Would I the english King, suicide would be my only option, and hoping that I pass through the white hole. 
Another good reason to vote!
Another good reason to vote!
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Brandenburg: 1485
King: “Ok, lets see what’s in the mail… New Core…. New Core… New Core… "
"What’s this?”
King: “Bah! Just another scam!”
Messenger: “Your highness! You are needed in Mecklenburg immediately! I am afraid it is of dire consequence…”
King: “Oh no, what’s happened now? A rebellion?”
Messenger: “No your majesty. It appears your uncle Arnulf has… an illness!”
King: “Dire news indeed. I must leave with much haste!”
Later…
King Arnulf: “Hey everybody… glad you can make it. WHEEEEEEEEZE! The…. The doctors say I have an illness…”
King Johann: “Yes uncle… We’ve heared.”
King Arnulf: “Oh, I can feel myself fade. My soul’s fleeting span is at its end. Tell me dear nephew, forst what shall I be remembered?”
King Johann: “For your vast ceramic unicorn collection Uncle Arnzy…”
King Arnulf: “Good. I have spoken my last rite and taken care of my affairs. I believe that now I may abandon this short existence and begin the ultimate and lasting one. Before I leave I have left but to utter my final words. The ending to the soliloquy of life.
King Johann: “Speak it now, so it may be heard and remembered.”
King Arnulf: “I like pie.”
The old kings eyes slowly shut and he sank deeper into the mattress of his deathbed. And then, with astounding speed he shot upright.
King Johann: “AAAGGGGGGGHHHHH!!!! ZOMBIE!!! Kill it! Kill it!”
King Johann began to strike his dear old uncle in the head repeadedly.
Mecklenburgian Archbishop: “STOP! STOP! You’re not hitting him hard enough!”
The Archbishop quickly grabbed the old king’s sceptre and began to beat him with it. The rest of the group quickly joined in. Afterwards everybody was to agree that it was all jolly good fun and would look forward to the next deathbed service greatly.
A few days later:
Archbishop of Mecklenburg: “Ok everybody, time to read out King Arnulf’s will. Lets see…. ‘Dear relatives’ blah blah blah…. ‘Deep love’, blah blah blah…. Ah, here we go. ‘To my Nephew Johann I leave my prized porcelain unicorn collection, and to my Great Great Second-Cousin-in-Law’s Nephew’s Groundskeeper I leave my kingdom…. I believe that’s the King of Gelre!”
King of Gelre upon hearing the news:
A few seconds later:
And with that the War of Gelring Duchebaggery began. It would see Brandenburg, England, and Saxony fighting against Gelre, Bavaria, and The Palatinate.
Next time on Glory and Poro Splelling: Find out who will win in this most Glorious and Epic war!
King: “Ok, lets see what’s in the mail… New Core…. New Core… New Core… "
"What’s this?”
King: “Bah! Just another scam!”
Messenger: “Your highness! You are needed in Mecklenburg immediately! I am afraid it is of dire consequence…”
King: “Oh no, what’s happened now? A rebellion?”
Messenger: “No your majesty. It appears your uncle Arnulf has… an illness!”
King: “Dire news indeed. I must leave with much haste!”
Later…
King Arnulf: “Hey everybody… glad you can make it. WHEEEEEEEEZE! The…. The doctors say I have an illness…”
King Johann: “Yes uncle… We’ve heared.”
King Arnulf: “Oh, I can feel myself fade. My soul’s fleeting span is at its end. Tell me dear nephew, forst what shall I be remembered?”
King Johann: “For your vast ceramic unicorn collection Uncle Arnzy…”
King Arnulf: “Good. I have spoken my last rite and taken care of my affairs. I believe that now I may abandon this short existence and begin the ultimate and lasting one. Before I leave I have left but to utter my final words. The ending to the soliloquy of life.
King Johann: “Speak it now, so it may be heard and remembered.”
King Arnulf: “I like pie.”
The old kings eyes slowly shut and he sank deeper into the mattress of his deathbed. And then, with astounding speed he shot upright.
King Johann: “AAAGGGGGGGHHHHH!!!! ZOMBIE!!! Kill it! Kill it!”
King Johann began to strike his dear old uncle in the head repeadedly.
Mecklenburgian Archbishop: “STOP! STOP! You’re not hitting him hard enough!”
The Archbishop quickly grabbed the old king’s sceptre and began to beat him with it. The rest of the group quickly joined in. Afterwards everybody was to agree that it was all jolly good fun and would look forward to the next deathbed service greatly.
A few days later:
Archbishop of Mecklenburg: “Ok everybody, time to read out King Arnulf’s will. Lets see…. ‘Dear relatives’ blah blah blah…. ‘Deep love’, blah blah blah…. Ah, here we go. ‘To my Nephew Johann I leave my prized porcelain unicorn collection, and to my Great Great Second-Cousin-in-Law’s Nephew’s Groundskeeper I leave my kingdom…. I believe that’s the King of Gelre!”
King of Gelre upon hearing the news:
A few seconds later:
And with that the War of Gelring Duchebaggery began. It would see Brandenburg, England, and Saxony fighting against Gelre, Bavaria, and The Palatinate.
Next time on Glory and Poro Splelling: Find out who will win in this most Glorious and Epic war!
:rofl:
That deathbed scene is hilarious. It makes me think of both blackadder and monthy python
That deathbed scene is hilarious. It makes me think of both blackadder and monthy python
demokratickid: Thank you kind sir
Griffin.Gen: Huzza!
Slinky: Thanks, I thought the same thing after writing it. I is proud
Enewald: Thanks!
tedescooo: Yay! New fan!
Mohatma: Indeed, everyone knows that the only way to be great is to be a part of Brandenburg!
Now, I'm feeling pretty sick, and tired from work and writing an update is a little hard but hold on the next update is coming soon. This isn't 10 Years Gone or anything...The coundown is still going, ( I aint no 10 AM Automatic, that's for sure!) it's going to take some time. Don't Worry, my mind is always rambling, I'll update soon! After all, all this glory and all the poro splilngin, It Just Got to Be.
Griffin.Gen: Huzza!
Slinky: Thanks, I thought the same thing after writing it. I is proud
Enewald: Thanks!
tedescooo: Yay! New fan!
Mohatma: Indeed, everyone knows that the only way to be great is to be a part of Brandenburg!
Now, I'm feeling pretty sick, and tired from work and writing an update is a little hard but hold on the next update is coming soon. This isn't 10 Years Gone or anything...The coundown is still going, ( I aint no 10 AM Automatic, that's for sure!) it's going to take some time. Don't Worry, my mind is always rambling, I'll update soon! After all, all this glory and all the poro splilngin, It Just Got to Be.
Last edited:
Ok, so I AM feeling rather sick, and AM pretty tired so this may not be that good but I will still update today! (Also I recommend checking out those songs, at least the Black Keys ones, they're pretty kick ass)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Last time on Glory and Proo Sepllign
Brandenburg declared war on Gelre!
Lets see what happened!
After the war was finished King Johann returned to his dinner, which to his displeasure had started to get cold. He just finished when another messanger arrived with the morning’s messages.
King Johann: “Ok, lets see…”
“Awww… How cute!”
“Tell them they can have their extra cheese, but only that individually packaged junk!”
“What!??! Bring the Duke of Gelre here now!”
The Duke came in, hunched over and wearing all black. “Whada ya want?” he groaned.
“What’s the meaning of this young man?” The king chided, raising the message. “And why are you wearing that?”
The duke sighed. “I need bigger allowance to by eyeliner, and conforming to this fashion trend expresses my unique personality. Can I GO now?”
The king was shocked, “I am your king and you will treat me with respect! Got that mister?”
“What-ever!” retorted the duck.
“That’s it! No trade agreements until you shape up!” the king was furious.
“You can’t do that! It’s… It’s not fair!” the duke was near crying.
“Life isn’t fair either, now go to your castle!” the king ordered.
“You know, maybe I’ll just run away!” the duke ran off crying.
“Dukes these days!”
….
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Last time on Glory and Proo Sepllign
Brandenburg declared war on Gelre!
Lets see what happened!
After the war was finished King Johann returned to his dinner, which to his displeasure had started to get cold. He just finished when another messanger arrived with the morning’s messages.
King Johann: “Ok, lets see…”
“Awww… How cute!”
“Tell them they can have their extra cheese, but only that individually packaged junk!”
“What!??! Bring the Duke of Gelre here now!”
The Duke came in, hunched over and wearing all black. “Whada ya want?” he groaned.
“What’s the meaning of this young man?” The king chided, raising the message. “And why are you wearing that?”
The duke sighed. “I need bigger allowance to by eyeliner, and conforming to this fashion trend expresses my unique personality. Can I GO now?”
The king was shocked, “I am your king and you will treat me with respect! Got that mister?”
“What-ever!” retorted the duck.
“That’s it! No trade agreements until you shape up!” the king was furious.
“You can’t do that! It’s… It’s not fair!” the duke was near crying.
“Life isn’t fair either, now go to your castle!” the king ordered.
“You know, maybe I’ll just run away!” the duke ran off crying.
“Dukes these days!”
….
This is absolutely brilliant, but I hate it!
But only because it made me fall out of my chair.
That's because I laughed my a** off and had nothing left that could support my weight... :rofl:
As always, Good stuff.
T
EnragedKiwi: Thank you!
Enewald: Tricks on you, those monkeys aren't sharp at all!
antracer: Hmmm.... Perhaps I should stop before I end up putting you in the hospital?
Delex: Good to here, I was a little nervous about it's quality... I've got a pretty bad cold and me no think gooder now...
demokratickid: We may end up seeing more of him in the future
Slinky: Do'h! Damn you spill-Czech!
Update coming up shortly! (While you wait watch this!)
Enewald: Tricks on you, those monkeys aren't sharp at all!
antracer: Hmmm.... Perhaps I should stop before I end up putting you in the hospital?
Delex: Good to here, I was a little nervous about it's quality... I've got a pretty bad cold and me no think gooder now...
demokratickid: We may end up seeing more of him in the future
Slinky: Do'h! Damn you spill-Czech!
Update coming up shortly! (While you wait watch this!)
King of Brandenburg: “Ok, delt with that ungrateful duke, time to finish the war.”
Three Days Later…
King Johann: “Ok, that was easy enough. Four new provinces, good haul. Hmmm…. I should probably help Saxony with that rebel problem. I’ll put it on my list.”
Six Months Later…
Johann: “Ah, Crap.”
Messenger: “Sire, the King of Saxony is here, he’s in the throne room.”
King Johann: “Ok, I’ll see to it right away.”
King of Saxony: “Ah, Johann, how are you this evening?”
King Johann: “Pretty good Coltz, however I hear you are less well off than I.”
King Coltz: “Yes, it would appear so. I come here to ask your assistance in our war with the Thurings.”
King Johann: “I will send my men at once.”
King Coltz: “Ah good. I am to personally lead my men against these most vile rebels.”
Later
More Laterer...
The Prince of Thuringia, under a white flag rides to meet the enemy commanders. After a long siege he and his people are exhausted and willing to do anything to get out of the war, even annexation.
The Prince dismounted his horse, the last one left in the city, and walked to meet the Saxon commander. He stepped closer and closer, knowing that with each step his new country was slipping away. Then suddenly the king of Brandonburg jumped between him and the Saxon shouting “I annex you!”
“Heh heh, this is for Anhalt!"
Messenger: "Your Highness, your advisors have sent me to tell you that we should probably lay off the wars for a bit..."
King Johann: "WHAT!?!?! What else is there for us to do than wage pointless wars?"
Messenger: "I dunno, maybe build a navy or something."
King Johann: "Ok, you'll be our new admeral!"
Messenger: "Me and my big mouth..."
Three Days Later…
King Johann: “Ok, that was easy enough. Four new provinces, good haul. Hmmm…. I should probably help Saxony with that rebel problem. I’ll put it on my list.”
Six Months Later…
Johann: “Ah, Crap.”
Messenger: “Sire, the King of Saxony is here, he’s in the throne room.”
King Johann: “Ok, I’ll see to it right away.”
King of Saxony: “Ah, Johann, how are you this evening?”
King Johann: “Pretty good Coltz, however I hear you are less well off than I.”
King Coltz: “Yes, it would appear so. I come here to ask your assistance in our war with the Thurings.”
King Johann: “I will send my men at once.”
King Coltz: “Ah good. I am to personally lead my men against these most vile rebels.”
Later
More Laterer...
The Prince of Thuringia, under a white flag rides to meet the enemy commanders. After a long siege he and his people are exhausted and willing to do anything to get out of the war, even annexation.
The Prince dismounted his horse, the last one left in the city, and walked to meet the Saxon commander. He stepped closer and closer, knowing that with each step his new country was slipping away. Then suddenly the king of Brandonburg jumped between him and the Saxon shouting “I annex you!”
“Heh heh, this is for Anhalt!"
Messenger: "Your Highness, your advisors have sent me to tell you that we should probably lay off the wars for a bit..."
King Johann: "WHAT!?!?! What else is there for us to do than wage pointless wars?"
Messenger: "I dunno, maybe build a navy or something."
King Johann: "Ok, you'll be our new admeral!"
Messenger: "Me and my big mouth..."
Another duck, am I seeing a pattern here
There is still some room to behave badly, but not too much. You relations with other countries are already strained, but I don't see how you can keep those crazy kings of yours in check
There is still some room to behave badly, but not too much. You relations with other countries are already strained, but I don't see how you can keep those crazy kings of yours in check