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Wraith11B

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For sure, those screenshots are small and difficult to read...

K1zhbbm.gif


That said, let's hear it for the Paradox Tutorial Maker (Or should that really be the Paradox Interactive Training Assistant?) doing so little, with so much?!
 
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TheButterflyComposer

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For sure, those screenshots are small and difficult to read...

Mm, I wasn't sure about the aspect ratio and sizes. I think we can add this to the list of things ck2 does better. The text boxes are much blurring and harder to read. And the colours aren't optimal I think.

Will attempt to fix, or at least make bigger.

EDIT: Christ, you're right. On the mobile version of the website you can barely see anything. I'll investigate this further but it does look like the screenshot made what was hazy nigh-incomprehensible.

That said, let's hear it for the Paradox Tutorial Maker (Or should that really be the Paradox Interactive Training Assistant?) doing so little, with so much?!

I wasnt going out of my way to single out or attack the tutorial program but yeah...I really began picturing a sort of faux-cheerful 50s radio announcer but he's decribing nuclear winter. The dissonance is disconcerting but...diverting?

Although saying that, the scroll over highlight function is quite good. Better yet, it stacks, so you can fill the screen with definitions and explanations should you so wish.
 
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nuclearslurpee

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This is marvellous stuff. PTM is very upfront about how your game world is screwed now you have begun, and it’s all your fault. ‘Victory’, however you personally define it, will ultimately prove meaningless and futile against the vast eons of spacetime.
This AAR is off to an absolutely poetic start, making even such literary classics as Ecclesiastes, Heart of Darkness, or the Twilight saga seem bright and uplifting by comparison.

Ged is also present, forced to watch frozen at the bottom of the screen as we learn to work the map movement functions (such earth-shattering concepts as WASD for movement and mouse scrolling for zooming).
I'm still seething that Paradox couldn't figure out how to implement WASD for entirely too many literal decades. Grumbles in HoI3 main

CK3 spans generations. These characters are tools, playthings of your whims and fantasies. It’s the Map, the Realm that is important. It is the kingdom that will weather the centuries, not Ged. Certainly not Ged. If it comes down to it, throw Ged to the badgers for the good of the realm. So long as he has babies to assimilate and possess, of course.
God forbid any Paradox game ever be anything but a map-painting simulator at the end of the day, really.

This could of course be Paradox again demonstrating their unique perspective on their customer base as small, easily distracted and satisfied children. I don’t know. Then again, the fact I’m writing this thing indicates the strategy worked, so I can only bow to their superiority once again.
You small, easily-distracted child, you. I hope you're satisfied.

I know I am. :p

Take it then, you miserable sack of penguin excrement.
I see familial relations are a bit chilly these days. Lots of cold shoulders being given.

I wasnt going out of my way to single out or attack the tutorial program but yeah...I really began picturing a sort of faux-cheerful 50s radio announcer but he's decribing nuclear winter. The dissonance is disconcerting but...diverting?
Every Paradox game ever requires the player to cheerfully accept that they are essentially roleplaying various forms of genocide, and that this is morally and ethically a-okay. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a million Soviet troops in a pocket that need to be...liquidated.

Mm, I wasn't sure about the aspect ratio and sizes. I think we can add this to the list of things ck2 does better. The text boxes are much blurring and harder to read. And the colours aren't optimal I think.

Will attempt to fix, or at least make bigger.

EDIT: Christ, you're right. On the mobile version of the website you can barely see anything. I'll investigate this further but it does look like the screenshot made what was hazy nigh-incomprehensible.
I was about to mention this myself. I hope this isn't a bug baked into the release version of the game itself, I haven't seen a screenshot bug that bad since whatever the Hell happened with Civ 4.
 
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TheButterflyComposer

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This AAR is off to an absolutely poetic start, making even such literary classics as Ecclesiastes, Heart of Darkness, or the Twilight saga seem bright and uplifting by comparison.

I thibk that's as close to praise as I can reasonably expect from something like this. CK3 is, for now, fine. I'm less than two hours in so have no business making any sort of judgement on the game itself, other than to pin paradox to the wall and note the obvious gap/nice thing.

God forbid any Paradox game ever be anything but a map-painting simulator at the end of the day, really.

Don't think about it, is the mission statement for all players and devs. Sure you can joke about it afterwards on forums and stuff, but when you're playing, you don't think too much about the effect you're having on the world.

Of course, this is Ged's Existential Nightmare, where that doesn't really work...

You small, easily-distracted child, you. I hope you're satisfied.

I know I am. :p

Yeah...the condescension from the 'Nice Job!' Text box had to be commented on, even though you really can't knock their business practices in terms of results.

I see familial relations are a bit chilly these days. Lots of cold shoulders being given.

I have no idea why. As I said, the guy is unlanded and untalented. The dad is no great shake of a lamb's tale (wroth and impatient and temperate must have made for a fun childhood for the kid) but it seems mostly just a bit of mild soap opera mutual hatred thats forogtten within moments.

I remain bewildered by the bribe target choice though. Ged starts the game with an earl and a bishop who dislike him, so why not bribe them and mix in some vassal learning?

I was about to mention this myself. I hope this isn't a bug baked into the release version of the game itself, I haven't seen a screenshot bug that bad since whatever the Hell happened with Civ 4.

I'm starting to suspect it's a little bit of me cropping the images down so the tiny boxes aren't lost in the giant screen, and the truly awful colour balancing in the actual game. I'm not sure what this bodes for in future AARs, but the text itself, never mind the boxes, really is that small.

The screenshots I have compared to other aars on the page seem similar, but I've blown smaller areas up. Pop ups seem to be a good two thirds of the screen in size and uniquely crafted or rsther small text boxes with grey on grey colours. I miss the parchment and big black text.
 
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El Pip

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This is, as expected, excellent and is written in a style and tone I 100% approve of.

So, what have we learnt thus far?

Well:
  • Ged is doomed, obviously.
  • Maps are pretty awesome. I mean, come on! Look at those maps!
  • Paradox knows their audience better than I know when to stop.
  • Death is certain.
You missed off;
  • Core features are missing, so they can be added by DLC
  • Those DLCs have probably already been created and are just waiting for release at.. Christmas? (they can surely wait that long. Surely?) It will probably have an incredibly anachronistic event where you can tell your children Father Christmas doesn't exist in order to gain some piety or prestige. Then sacrifice their presents to Odin.
Next Time, Ged enters the wonderful world of wedded life! Only to be told love is a lie, and happiness is cheap. Till then, venerable readers, goodnight, and sleep well.
Will PTM teach you about how you can repeatedly marry and divorce the same person to gain prestige, which I understand is an entirely valid strategy in the current game?
 
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Nikolai

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The latter half of the screenshots doesn't show for me, unfortunately. :(
 

TheButterflyComposer

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This is, as expected, excellent and is written in a style and tone I 100% approve of.

Always nervous when I go this angry logicked route but people seem to like it???

Core features are missing, so they can be added by DLC

Well the map is pretty much complete and you can play as all regions immediately but not republics. And you still can't cocking play the pope! The former is definitely dlc in the way they phrased it ('tee-hee, not yet! Etc).

If the game was never expanded past this point, there is a huge map and lots of variety, more than original ck2. But let's be real, this game is going to be three times bigger in five years.

Those DLCs have probably already been created and are just waiting for release at.. Christmas? (they can surely wait that long. Surely?) It will probably have an incredibly anachronistic event where you can tell your children Father Christmas doesn't exist in order to gain some piety or prestige. Then sacrifice their presents to Odin.

Father Christmas is Odin so...yes? In ck2, you can sacrifice your children to Odin so this is actually a step down...

The latter half of the screenshots doesn't show for me, unfortunately. :(

I'm currently fixing them up. It does seem to be a game thing but I'll try and make them as clear as possible.

Will PTM teach you about how you can repeatedly marry and divorce the same person to gain prestige, which I understand is an entirely valid strategy in the current game?

Not that exactly but you're on the right cynical wavelength. Trust me, the marriage of Ged is a darkly funny thing, and a chance to view into his psyche.

EDIT: Ok, screenshots should be back up and working now. I still don't know why they went with dark grey on grey text but presumably its the same person who designed the new forum layout...
 
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alscon

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That's the cynical tone I needed. Especially as I skipped the tutorial - PTM is truly glorious at times.
 
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TheButterflyComposer

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That's the cynical tone I needed. Especially as I skipped the tutorial - PTM is truly glorious at times.

They sort of knew what they were doing, or at least what was important. PTM is indeed a force of nature onto itself.
 
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El Pip

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New screenshots are still a bit blurry and I think part of it is compression effect - the files are very small JPGs so have been viciously squished. Obviously this is Paradox's fault.

Father Christmas is Odin so...yes? In ck2, you can sacrifice your children to Odin so this is actually a step down...
I'm assuming you want to utterly break the child's spirit and soul first. Then sacrifice the child to Odin.

If you just jump straight to child sacrifice then you are missing out on many nilihstically grim opportunities to gain money/prestige/traits from being horrific. And what is CK about if not being horrific for minor perks? (OK it is mainly about child murder to inherit land, but apart from that).
 
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New screenshots are still a bit blurry and I think part of it is compression effect - the files are very small JPGs so have been viciously squished. Obviously this is Paradox's fault.

I guess it is, since I've been doing JPEG compression for my images for all my AARs and these are the ones that are blurry? Unless you were all giggling about it behind my back for 3 years?:eek:

I'm assuming you want to utterly break the child's spirit and soul first. Then sacrifice the child to Odin.

If you just jump straight to child sacrifice then you are missing out on many nilihstically grim opportunities to gain money/prestige/traits from being horrific. And what is CK about if not being horrific for minor perks? (OK it is mainly about child murder to inherit land, but apart from that).

Honestly, being needlessly cruel for a small amount of money or prestige is the bread and butter of a ckii game. That, or picking the opposite option of not doing the needlessly cruel thing for pocket change and one point of impressiveness.
 

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I guess it is, since I've been doing JPEG compression for my images for all my AARs and these are the ones that are blurry? Unless you were all giggling about it behind my back for 3 years?

Honestly, comparing these to your previous CK2 AARs, I think it's the way the compression is interacting with the more subdued color palette; the new ones are still a bit blurry and hard to read (though on my part that could just be down to my steadily deteriorating eyesight). There are some noticeable artifacts on the older screenshots as well, but the text contrasts a lot better with the background there, so my brain usually just filters it out.
 
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New screenshots are still a bit blurry and I think part of it is compression effect - the files are very small JPGs so have been viciously squished. Obviously this is Paradox's fault.
I guess it is, since I've been doing JPEG compression for my images for all my AARs and these are the ones that are blurry? Unless you were all giggling about it behind my back for 3 years?:eek:
Honestly, comparing these to your previous CK2 AARs, I think it's the way the compression is interacting with the more subdued color palette; the new ones are still a bit blurry and hard to read (though on my part that could just be down to my steadily deteriorating eyesight). There are some noticeable artifacts on the older screenshots as well, but the text contrasts a lot better with the background there, so my brain usually just filters it out.

It turns out they are saved as miniscule JPEG files as screenshots (smaller file size than prior titles), so far as I can tell, so there isn't much way of recording the game without screen capturing the whole screen manually and cutting out paradox entirely. And even then, you have the problem of the colour pallete being reprehensible.

So...for future reference would-be AAR writers, focus on the largest custom text boxes rather than the normal set. And if you're doing an AAR about what these little boxes say...

Umm...

Create a feeling of absolute despair and cite it as part of the experience?

*points desperately at the premise and runs off*

Editors note: A lavish apology and lambasting of the textboxes will feature in the next chapter.
 
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Out of curiosity, are you using any third-party screen capture apps? Some of those allow you to customize things like file format and compression, as well as the choice of whether to capture the whole screen or just a defined section of it.
 

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Out of curiosity, are you using any third-party screen capture apps? Some of those allow you to customize things like file format and compression, as well as the choice of whether to capture the whole screen or just a defined section of it.

The normal screenshot feature paradox provides (F11 in game) and then editing on computer for size/composition before putting on imageshack and on here.

Might have to look into it but to be honest, there is little reason to focus down on text boxes unless you foolishly decided to focus on them. And even then, the tutorial stops sending messages after a while so we only have a hundred or so to go before we are free of them forever and can focus on the huge custom pop ups the devs intended for screenshots...
 
Hell is Other People

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Hell is Other People

Ged is still frozen in time, forced to watch as his life is systematically explained and deconstructed as part of a terrible grand game between cosmic entities. It is only going to get worse for him today.

Before that however, a bit of housekeeping from the prior toll. Whilst it is indeed true that Crusader Kings III is a beautiful game in many aspects, especially the Map (oh God, the Map!), at some point in the process something went terribly wrong and the monster that redesigned the forums got out of their prison. Thanks no doubt to the brave sacrifice of many Swedes, the damage was mitigated to one tiny, minuscule area of the game-play.

Unfortunately, that small piece was the text boxes for the entire game.

Scholars are as yet undecided on how a sapient mind can conceive of deciding upon grey text upon greyer background, yet it takes a kind of demented genius to not only do that, but have a slightly darker shade of grey text kick in for random paragraphs.

When the Great Day of Reckoning arrives, whoever okayed that decision will be put to the wall alongside the guy who wrote Fallout 3’s ending and everyone involved in creating Echo the Dolphin.

pngC0FXIj

Watch out for 'accidents' and 'terrible disease'!

Anyway, we were discussing Ged, were we not? So easy to forget him in the vastness of the game engine, isn’t it? The PTM remembers however, and does not like what they see. Ged is mortal and death is certain. We have covered this previously, but PTM feels the need (dare I say, the desire?) to spell it out for us. Not to worry, for children are there for parents to live through.

pnORBzskj

Brian inherits everything, but why not show me how screwed I'd be if he didn't?

PTM is breaking out the exclamation marks again, which never bears well for Ged. They are particularly gleeful when describing how you may find out that your new character murdered your old one and got away with it. What fun! Anyway, Ged has only managed to sire and raise one son, and he is a gigantic disappointment.

pnx8QF9Mj

It better not be identical to the CK2 system when it comes out...

Similarly, pay no mind to the fact you can’t play as a republic yet, even though it was one of the first things added to CK2.

pncJT0qBj

What a mess. Not just the inheritance. The screen is so dark when the UI is in use

Believe it or not, Ged’s actually very fortunate he did not sire more useless children, as PTM reveals we have the worst inheritance law in the game (presumably, unless they’ve come up with another one…). If Ged dies, as he certainly will, the realm will be torn apart by his surviving male babies. I suppose the fact that Ged is worthless and only has one county to his name works in our favour.

pmMFlknNj

Remember Ged, marriage sucks!

Of course, this one benefit of our present terrible situation is a tiny light in the dark PTM swiftly moves to extinguish. Ged is reminded that he is alone in the world, unloved and unlovable. His son hates him (allegedly). His vassals do not like him. Marriage, what should be that most noble and sacred of institutions, has been bastardised into a sham of political manoeuvring and behind-closed-doors abuse. Ged is indeed fortunate that his ex-wife is so dead that she never technically existed.

pn40VEdAj

I'm making you do it anyway!

PTM immediately afterwards forces a marriage. CK3 has buffed up the genetics of characters to the extent that it has never been easier to commit a centuries-long eugenics programme with your own children as test subjects. Naturally, the wise player will carefully select from the choicest of potential fruits (the tastiest kind of fruit), bearing in mind political ramifications and benefits against promoting or degrading the family bloodline.

poXZ1lgoj

A pretty gene that makes you more attractive and fertile...
Presumably then this will spread like syphilis through the continental aristocracy

Naturally, in the spirit of the game, I pick the first pretty woman I see. Apparently, her name is Urraka and she’s a content atheist. These two facts and her pretty gene are all we need to know going forward.

pndOcpm9j
pmXoLsEyj

Now everyone will live unhappily ever after! A least until someone dies...then we start again!

Ged doesn’t need to suffer alone however, and so we force his stupid son into marriage with a quick-witted girl, just to see what happens. The game and the wife (for some reason) wish Ged a long and fertile marriage. I’m sure he’ll enjoy shacking up with this random stranger for the rest of his life. Still, at least his son Brian is in much the same position.

poHc5okaj
pm1cWCPVj

We say 'technically' because our system is one size fits all and we're damned if we're changing it now

PTM then decides to tell us all about their pyramid scheme, or in common-parlance, feudalism. Just to affirm their lack of respect for Ged, they also talk about how ‘usually’ rulers have vassals but of course there is no way to guarantee say, Dukes, having control over their de jure realm. The tutorial isn’t even going anywhere with this until much later. PTM brings this up seemingly just to mock Ged’s tiny spread.

pmQphaTnj
pmYMLsDgg

It takes three years for Irish tribesmen to build a wall and ditch around their capital in 1066 AD.
It also takes the entire Kingdom of Ireland in the 14th century three years to build canon-proof walls

Holdings however, have been changed as well. Now with the county split on the Map, the Player can directly select their holds with greater ease. Of course, PTM is still spouting heretical nonsense about what you build ‘doesn’t really matter’ but we need not listen to their lies. We shall build an incredibly ambitious (and exceedingly a-historical) set of bastions and curtain walls around our wooden shack. The game cheerfully informs us we can upgrade these beauties all the way up to resisting canon fire (whatever those are). Who knew the Irish were such great builders?

If you are thinking differently, especially if you are thinking of that Faulty Towers episode, you’re being racist.

pnpbYH88j
pm4zo2Mvj

Yes, the earl is a viking. No, the county itself is not Norwegian.
Yes, he does suddenly decide in a few years that he's actually Irish

We then meet our vassals for the first time, after being told the utmost importance of keeping them happy. Needless to say, like everyone else, they shit on Ged. I’m not sure what he did to these people (or why a Norwegian Viking is pretending to be landed gentry) but I’m sure it was justified. If we go down that rabbit hole, we’ll start wondering why tribal Irish leaders are being called ‘Earls’ in 1066…

pneIdN28j
pnovFiP6j

Not a particularly loyal or competent bunch. A fairly good example of typical CK councils

PTM then introduces us to even more people who don’t like Ged all that much. The new council system has the wife of the ruler in her own place, and switched things around so the Bishop of your council is the one going around committing active fraud by fabricating title claims. This rather impressively makes the Church even more fundamentally corrupt than in CK2.

pngRHC5dj

Time to do the masochism tango. The only language these priests understand is interpretive dance!

For some reason, even though we have an absurd amount of money and have already been told how to bribe people, PTM forces us to ‘sway’ with Bishop Fernando instead. You may wonder why they didn’t have it so bribing council members (something everyone does all the time in Crusader Kings) and influencing family members (ditto) wasn’t the order of the tutorial, rather than the opposite. We all wonder, for there is much to wonder about in this sick world.

pnhQARKRj
poDkRjLyj

Ged is wrathful and temperate, and now can be wholesome and a blackmailer. Variety is the spice of life in CK3

Although swaying with characters is a more ‘wholesome’ way of scheming, according to PTM, they then enthusiastically talk about all the blackmail material you can gain on some sucker by doing it. Perhaps this is why we had to target the bishop, as PTM has already set it so they are doing something unspeakable we can use against them (I genuinely do not know if this is the case. If it is, it hasn’t come up yet). If religious figures didn’t like Paradox already, they certainly aren’t winning any friends here.

So, what have we learnt today?

Well:

  • There is no end to Ged’s suffering.
  • Someone at the Dev Office needs to say no to that designer.
  • Eugenics is perfectly acceptable as long as you know you are doing it.
  • Republics are impossible. Can’t be done. *cough* Got any change, gov’na?
  • The medieval Irish possessed at least the theory of sloped artillery forts.
  • Do not believe the vicar’s lies.
Next Time, Ged enters the wonderful world of warfare! Marvel at the death and destruction, as well as the inherent class-discrimination of the medieval battlefield. Till then, venerable readers, goodnight, and pray for Ged.
 
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Ged is going to be really messed up by the end :=)
 

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I guess it is, since I've been doing JPEG compression for my images for all my AARs and these are the ones that are blurry? Unless you were all giggling about it behind my back for 3 years?:eek:
Actually, I had noticed on your Lancaster AAR that the images were a bit fuzzier than some as well. Could it be partly due to however you’re converting the original screenshots (which iirc in CK2 are higher resolution png files in their native format) into jpg format for AAR publishing? There is always some loss of quality in that process.

PS: You mention jpg compression: not sure what’s involved in that. I just take the original png, crop it, save it as a jpg without changing anything except the file format. There is a slight resolution degrade, but very little.
 

TheButterflyComposer

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Actually, I had noticed on your Lancaster AAR that the images were a bit fuzzier than some as well. Could it be partly due to however you’re converting the original screenshots (which iirc in CK2 are higher resolution png files in their native format) into jpg format for AAR publishing? There is always some loss of quality in that process.

PS: You mention jpg compression: not sure what’s involved in that. I just take the original png, crop it, save it as a jpg without changing anything except the file format. There is a slight resolution degrade, but very little.

I don't do any compression deliberately. I tend to take the screenshots, crop em, make em jpegs and put em online. I can only assume it's the jpeg process.