Furious Vengance - A 1944 UK AAR

[El Pip]

4th Dimension - Patience sir, patience. The master plan is still unfolding.

Sir Humphrey - Indeed.

C&D - A few things to mop up first sir, but they're on the list.

trekaddict - Clearly a popular plan.

Murmurandus - Very wise.

Nathan Madien - It was your own tea you destroyed, you were only hurting yourself.

trekaddict - As always wise words.

Beladriel - We've got crack philosophers working on the problem as we speak! They say it could be tricky and probably very paradoxical.

Chief Ragusa - That is the correct ratio of foreign policy experts.

 

[El Pip]

A Fortunate Solution!​

While worrying about how to cope with this 'Peace' phenomenon, cases on no-trauma-at-all stress disorder are through the roof apparently, we receive a nice letter from the League of Nations;

Frankly we'd forgotten we'd even entered that competition, let alone what the prize was. It's always nice to win things anyway.​

Obviously we claim the territory, to the considerable annoyance of the ex-Ottoman states in the area. Still rules are rules as they say.

France is particularly annoyed at losing her last two puppets. While sympathetic we do tell them they should have read the small print more carefully.​

However that doesn't solve our lack of war problem, though it is a nice distraction.

Fortunately while shipping our boys back from the Caribbean we notice a lingering outpost of Fascism we can mop up; Spain!

Now Franco may try and hide behind being calling the country Monarchist Spain but we know the truth; all El Pip's AAR games are played from the same directory. That name is nothing more than a copy over from 'The Butterfly Effect'!

To war and liberation of the Spanish, no more will they be forced by the culture police to push donkeys of church towers! Instead they can go back to doing it voluntarily and for fun, like they used to.​

Back to war, to the great relief of all non-Spaniards involved. Can the mighty British war machine trample the cunning and crafty Spanish or will Franco spring a massive surprise? What new shiny toys will get an outing? Will any allies send useless expeditionary forces? Find out next time!

 

[trekaddict]

Hooray! WAR!

 

[Sir Humphrey]

How terribly unsportin'.

 

[Murmurandus]

Thank God we got over that peace thingie rather quickly...

 

[Lord Strange]

Phew. No more horrific peaces.

 

[trekaddict]

Dear god, what are we going to do when the whole world is the British Empire? Create fake enemies ala 1984?

 

[phargle]

Heh, cash alternative?

What's behind door number three?

DEAL OR NO DEAL?!

 

[Raaritsgozilla]

A Fortunate Solution!​

While worrying about how to cope with this 'Peace' phenomenon, cases on no-trauma-at-all stress disorder are through the roof apparently, we recieve a nice letter from the League of Nations;

Frankly we'd forgotten we'd even entered that competition, let alone what the prize was. It's always nice to win things anyway.​

Excellent.... Moar war I says!
On an aside, El Pip is the King Haakon AAR dead? It was the first AAR I read, and made me laugh so hard I fell off my chair.I liked the Milliganesque tones to it.

 

[cdcdrr]

Heh, cash alternative?

What's behind door number three?

DEAL OR NO DEAL?!

I bet it was 'War with United States'. The best solution for peace. But I think Spain will put off the boredom for a least a day.

 

[Nathan Madien]

Nathan Madien - It was your own tea you destroyed, you were only hurting yourself.

Perhaps, but we weren't the ones who closed down Boston and placed Massachusetts under martial law as a result of that little tea party.

Back to war, to the great relief of all non-Spaniards involved. Can the mighty British war machine trample the cunning and crafty Spanish or will Franco spring a massive surprise? What new shiny toys will get an outing? Will any allies send useless expeditionary forces? Find out next time!

I think Franco should spring a massive surprise.

*Franco uses Afternoon Sleep attack! It is super-effective!*

 

[Beladriel]

Great Game still goes on? Wow!

Oh, and I agree with Raaritsgozilla about Norway AAR. It should go on.

 

[El Pip]

trekaddict - War! What is it good for? Most things!

Sir Humphrey - Not sure what you're on about old bean?

Murmurandus - Peace is bad for you....

Lord Strange - Heaven forbid.

trekaddict - I was thinking more invading the Moon.

phargle - Deal?

Raaritsgozilla - Perhaps when I finally finish this beasty I may return to King Haakon and finish that epic tale as well. But not both at the same time! :wacko:

C&D - A cunning plan is being prepared for that eventuality.

Nathan Madien - Well if you'd only appreciated the true scale of the tragedy it wouldn't have been necessary. If only there had been those booms used to contain oil slicks available, then perhaps the tea could have been recovered and the entire incident could well have been avoided.

Beladriel - Every game continues until it's abandoned or someone wins. Much like King Haakon actually which, as it hasn't been abandoned, still continues, though very slowly I confess.

 

[enigmamcmxc]

Only up to page 5 but chuckling away here in work! :rofl:

 

[Nathan Madien]

Nathan Madien - Well if you'd only appreciated the true scale of the tragedy it wouldn't have been necessary. If only there had been those booms used to contain oil slicks available, then perhaps the tea could have been recovered and the entire incident could well have been avoided.

I actually heard somewhere that you could taste the tea in Boston Harbor after the event for a while.

 

[El Pip]

It's back. And it will have it's vengeance in this update or the next.

Correcting oversights.​

Our most innovative and cunning generals, along with Bernard 'Parachute' Montgomery, gather to prepare our plan for Spain. After a great deal of discussion, pipe smoking and several large whiskies the scheme emerges;

We're calling it "Operation CHARGE!!!", what it lacks in subtlety it makes up in massive amounts of tanks, carriers and air support.​

The key element of the plan is to use our latest and greatest units to bludgeon the Spanish into submission through superior technology and better hats.

At sea the Royal Navy's latest carriers trounce the opposing fleet from hundreds of kilometres away. While wearing very jaunty hats.

On land the British army uses the latest Centurion tanks, advanced mechanised division and cool hats to pummel poorly attired, very old and bombed to buggery infantry.

Finally in the air the RAF uses it's brand new de Havilland Venoms escorted by de Havilland Venoms to... Wait a minute, there's something wrong here.​

Quite aside from the lack of hats there is something wrong here, tactical and escort aircraft both the same make and model. Very odd. We decide to compare and contrast these allegedly identical new aircraft, starting with the bomber;

[IMGhttps://i.imgur.com/eucXW6x.jpg[/IMG]
So this one has the longer range but can't detect things in the air.​

Meanwhile the escort fighter;

While this one can see things further away but has a maximum speed of zero. That probably explains its far shorter range if we're honest.​

A generous interpretation would be we have entered the age of multi-role aircraft; highly advanced flexible aircraft capable of doing different jobs and having different specs despite being notionally identical. The actual interpretation is that the Swedes were too damned lazy to put in proper names and do a decent job.

Typical Swedes! Even after all this time they vex us! We resolve to solve this one and for all and consult our greatest-beginning-with-B-minds! Assembling the cunning dream team of Blackadder and Basil Brush we order them to create a plan of such cunning it will redefine the very meaning of the word.

However while that is going we turn our attention back to Iberia and in particular Portugal, the amusing side car to Spain's motorbike. We've received an alarming report about their government...

Argh! It's Swamp Thing. In an aircraft!​

Dear lord we must purge this flying abomination!

That'll sort it.​

Will the war on Iberia be a walkover or merely very easy? What cunning can Blackadder and Basil Brush combined produced? Will vengance, or even vengeance, be satisfied? Can the Swedish threat finally be countered? Will this finish before 2009, or even 2010? How long can I drag this out before even the committed band of followers give up and stop reading? Some of this will be answered next time!

 

[Le Jones]

A generous interpretation would be we have entered the age of multi-role aircraft; highly advanced flexible aircraft capable of doing different jobs and having different specs despite being notionally identical. The actual interpretation is that the Swedes were too damned lazy to put in proper names and do a decent job.

Typical Swedes! Even after all this time they vex us! We resolve to solve this one and for all and consult our greatest-beginning-with-B-minds! Assembling the cunning dream team of Blackadder and Basil Brush we order them to create a plan of such cunning it will redefine the very meaning of the word.

Brilliant - simply brilliant. Good luck against Swamp Thing!

 

[C'est Moi]

Will the war on Iberia be a walkover or merely very easy? What cunning can Blackadder and Basil Brush combined produced? Will vengance, or even vengeance, be satisfied? Can the Swedish threat finally be countered? Will this finish before 2009, or even 2010? How long can I drag this out before even the committed band of followers give up and stop reading? Some of this will be answered next time!

1. I sincerely hope Basil Fawlty is one of these beginning with B minds.

2. You can probably drag this out until 3010, we'll still be reading and laughing. Well not us, but our children's children's children's - you catch my drift.

3. You sir, are a genius, and British, thus more genius-y.

In summary, I love you and your work and would quite happily have your babies.

 

[4th Dimension]

When I saw this "simple" pathfinding

I was allmoust expecting Phargle copyrighted "The Plan was simple"

Those damned Swedes. When will their devilish slander end!

 

[trekaddict]

Not really. When you look closely you can see that the Cunning of the British is unsurpassed because they manually ordered all advancing Divisions to cover all the important locations in spain.