Like I said, I really don't feel like an etymological argument, but OED is not the only place to look. I literally (and yes, as in actually) watched a conference filled with linguistics professors debating this - most of the ones on the side of "no it isn't" tended to be the people that get uppity about contractions.
Sad news OP - if you do manage to make a triumphant comeback, will you continue to update this thread?
I gave up on the campaign. Might give it another go some other time.
Although I am sure than in the spirit of the whole 'I cant be wrong and if I debate some more someone will be convinced I'm not' this thread might see another two or three pages of the debate on whether my use of the word 'literal' in the OP was proper or not.
Thank you everyone that subscribed and enjoyed reading it.
Good luck on your campaigns.