heagarty: LOL!
Ontario Supreme Court
Family Court
Medical Division
Courtroom 42
Hepitis vs. MrT
Part 4
‘Wine? Who ordered red wine…and the bastard didn’t even let it breath so what was I supposed to do I ask you?”
quote from Hepitis
Well the Papal States were in a real mess. Only one province, allied to Sienna, Tuscany and Genoa and already massive war exhaustion. They must have been at war since 1419. Current wars were vs Naples which I seemed to be winning since I held Napoli already and was besieging Apulia. The other war was vs. Milan, Baden, Bavaria, Wurtemburg and Bohemia and I had no access to them and they refused to make peace. My navy…well, let’s not ask why the Papal navy was over near Gibraltar…I don’t think we need to know that.
I let the siege of Apulia continue and began building something resembling an army. This took (you guessed it) a series of loans to complete. Meanwhile the intrepid navy was cut in half trying to return to my only port – the controlled port in Napoli.
In Aug 1430 I captured Apulia and someone made peace before I could even negotiate one so I got Apulia…joy…10% RR due to nationalism and war exhaustion. EXPLETIVE@!
Instantly, Venice (+Serbia and Bosnia) decided that this was a good time to DOW Genoa and so we were dragged into another war right away before concluding the other. I sent the intrepid navy to sea with some troops from Apulia (which revolted) and proceeded to Corfu where I intended to land them. Thus began the year-long series of naval battles vs. Venice which I managed to lose consistently and was left with 6 ships out of the 12 I started with (the remainder of the 24 that were sight-seeing near Gibraltar). Forced back to Apulia, I sat there and sulked and drank red wine and tried to convince Venice to agree to a white peace even though the war score was –9%. Of course they weren’t interested, but I did manage to get Milan to agree to a white peace ending that war.
The remaining couple of years involved fighting rebels that showed up every couple months in Apulia, gradually whittling down my army. I was forced to take loan after loan to pay for the army replacements and upkeep and was delighted to go bankrupt in May 1433 – anyone notice a trend here?
For fun, Ragusa DOWed Genoa in May ’34 dragging us into yet another stupid war. I took a couple loans. In July, the trend of DOWing Genoa continued as Provence attacked and invited France, Savoy and Scotland along for the ride. Sienna and I decided we’d had enough and broke the alliance. I then quickly joined the Aragon/Naples alliance for some measure of self-preservation.
In November the nightmare continued as Apulia revolted for the umpteenth time and I lost control of the city and, worse, my 22k army lost the field battle vs. 3k rebel and was destroyed.
Sadly, the Papal States were pretty much in terrible shape when I left them in December, suffering 29% inflation and very unhappy.
“Sadly! Sadly he says. Not a word for me but he’s feeling sorry for a stupid computer-controlled bitmap. Worse, he suddenly throws back a Rum & Coke so I had yet another pollutant to deal with. The f***er!”
quote from Hepitis
So I take it that the TO and a G&T is on tap. Thanks for your organisation of the votes. Saves me from tallying it myself.
EDIT: Errr...make that 39% inflation.
