Female duke and lover will not marry me

[Keunus]

I am still pretty new too this game but this problem is the first I could not find on the internet.

I am duke and my lover is also a duke in the same realm.

My wife suddenly died ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
I did marry my son too my lover a few years back.
now that my wife died i wanted to claim my lover for myself to inherited her titles.

So I made up a story about my son to imprisn and execute him.

Now ME and my LOVER are both single but she will not accept my marriage.
Even matrilineal is a nogo for her (was checking)

It still says she is married with my dead son, not sure if that is the problem?
she also has the: become queen trait
her opinion of me is 77

Did my poor son die for nothing???!!!

 

[Keunus]

I noticed with a little bit more searching she has: political concerns. is there a way to overcome that?

 

[StarSword]

Okay, political concerns modifier means she's worried about the independence of her realm.

• https://www.reddit.com/r/CrusaderKings/comments/1zdx0p/political_concerns/
• https://steamcommunity.com/app/203770/discussions/0/610573751160531775/

Personally, if you weren't playing Ironman, unless your son was married to her matrilineally I'd just go back a save and marry somebody else.

 

[Keunus]

Okay, political concerns modifier means she's worried about the independence of her realm.

• https://www.reddit.com/r/CrusaderKings/comments/1zdx0p/political_concerns/
• https://steamcommunity.com/app/203770/discussions/0/610573751160531775/

Personally, if you weren't playing Ironman, unless your son was married to her matrilineally I'd just go back a save and marry somebody else.

I am playing on iron man. ohwell better next time. thanks for the answer!

 

[Knotz]

Wow and after you murdered your son to be with her, so ungrateful.

 

[Naufragus]

FWIW - The GOT mod has a great feature that allows you to rape and/or force marry prisoners. So you could kidnap her or siege her holding and then force her. I really wish they would add those mechanics to the stock game

 

[Sirrobert1]

FWIW - The GOT mod has a great feature that allows you to rape and/or force marry prisoners. So you could kidnap her or siege her holding and then force her. I really wish they would add those mechanics to the stock game

You can already do that. Pegans can have 3 concubines, and you can just pick a prisoner and declare her your concubine. So you can pillage capital holdings, take the royal woman, get a child, and press the child's claim.
The resulting children will get -1 diplomacy for being child of a concubine, but they count as regular children for inheritance

 

[plainsfox]

In addition, if you take a woman as your concubine, you can make her your wife.

 

[Brodacious]

But you cant take rulers as concubines, unless you take their land away first. I think OP wants to take her land peacefully.

 

[Knotz]

You can already do that. Pegans can have 3 concubines, and you can just pick a prisoner and declare her your concubine. So you can pillage capital holdings, take the royal woman, get a child, and press the child's claim.
The resulting children will get -1 diplomacy for being child of a concubine, but they count as regular children for inheritance

Yeah but you can't do it with landed women I think is the point. Frankly, if you could, there should be a not-insignificant chance of them stabbing you full of more holes than swiss cheese.

 

[Thure]

FWIW - The GOT mod has a great feature that allows you to rape and/or force marry prisoners. So you could kidnap her or siege her holding and then force her. I really wish they would add those mechanics to the stock game

Game of Thrones is NOT Middle Ages.
In Christian Europe at least this would NOT be possible that easily to just force a prisoned princess/queen/duchess into marriage.

 

[Azarias59]

FWIW - The GOT mod has a great feature that allows you to rape and/or force marry prisoners. So you could kidnap her or siege her holding and then force her. I really wish they would add those mechanics to the stock game

Forced marriages would be historically accurate, and since they already have forced concubinage in the game, adding in such an option makes a lot of sense.

But a "rape" button? While that did happen, it's not something that should be included in the base game.

 

[Sirrobert1]

Yeah but you can't do it with landed women I think is the point. Frankly, if you could, there should be a not-insignificant chance of them stabbing you full of more holes than swiss cheese.

Really? I never tried to kidnap female rulers, but I kidnapped the Pope quite regularly. So it's still possible to kidnap rulers themselves

 

[Knotz]

Really? I never tried to kidnap female rulers, but I kidnapped the Pope quite regularly. So it's still possible to kidnap rulers themselves

I only ever caught the Pope in combat, can you abduct him via raiding? And if so is there a gameplay difference between him and feudal rulers?

 

[Sirrobert1]

I only ever caught the Pope in combat, can you abduct him via raiding? And if so is there a gameplay difference between him and feudal rulers?

Yes, I've done so often. The Pope's lands are super easy raiding targets. Sometimes I even come raid during the recovery (like Rome itself has recovered from raiding, but the lowest 2 holdings haven't. Those recover while the rest is being seiged down).

As far as ransom, he counts as a regular king. That's what I usually do with him. Or if it's time, sacrifice him to the Odin

 

[Furion Matsuya]

Forced marriages would be historically accurate, and since they already have forced concubinage in the game, adding in such an option makes a lot of sense.

But a "rape" button? While that did happen, it's not something that should be included in the base game.

Concubinage isn't entirely the same as a normal marriage or forced marriage though from my understanding, concubines offspring having less status and prestige etc.

Also there is no "rape" button, the Game of Thrones mod has a decision called visit chambers where is discriptive enough but from what I remember only evil bastards can actually do it and it pisses off the woman in question and her kind and spouse etc and I think it also gives you opinion hits with your vassels (!?).
Its strictly a role playing option.

 

[Sirrobert1]

Concubinage isn't entirely the same as a normal marriage or forced marriage though from my understanding, concubines offspring having less status and prestige etc.

Yes, they get a 'child from concubine' status that gives -1 diplomacy. That's it

 

[Furion Matsuya]

Yes, they get a 'child from concubine' status that gives -1 diplomacy. That's it

I'm pretty sure that children of the actual wife take perference in the sucession in game as well if applicable.

 

[Dracko81]

Use conclave, get a favour. Force marriage. Problem solved.

I'm not 100% sure on this though as I've never forced it on a landed character, but it does work for unlanded characters.

I'm pretty sure that children of the actual wife take perference in the sucession in game as well if applicable.

They do not, eldest is eldest.

 

[Thrake]

Political concern partly depends on relative power of both parties; I happened to have the malus and then it would be gone after some blobbing; probably the AI saw me as a rival at first and when I were actually much stronger it thought it would be best to be in good terms with me.

Use conclave, get a favour. Force marriage. Problem solved.

Heirs and landed rulers can not be forced into marriage.