- Mar 31, 2008
Chapter Three: Uways Happy to Help
2 January 1477
Prathamesh slowly approached the throne room, he had good news for Nasir but was nonetheless a bit worried about this coming meeting. Nasir had not been particularly happy of late, several failed attempts at perfecting a black hair dye, made from dung and horseradish, leaving him less than impressed.
Gathering himself before opening the door to the throne room, Prathamesh consoled himself with the thought that Hemant had assured him that Nasir would be happy with this news. Having fortified himself with this thought Parthamesh thrust open the door, only to be met by the sight of Hemant happily explaining to Nasir how he had uncovered an old casus belli which had been forgotten about.
The exact same casus belli that Prathamesh had in fact uncovered and discussed with Hemant. Prathamesh was striken by anger upon listening to Hemant, the snake had stolen his chance to impress the Sultan and perhaps finally force Nasir to learn his name. A bewildered and unhappy Prathamesh could merely watch on whilst Nasir congratulated Hemant on his brilliant find.
Both Hemant and Nasir quickly agreed that as the Timurids were on the brink of ruin, now owning a mere three provinces, that Khandesh was forced to once again send aid to the struggling nation. This was especially true as Nasir's distant relative, Khan Uways I Faruqi, was still clinging to the Timurid throne.
Nasir was left surprised that this offer of aid had left the Timurids furious. For some reason they had felt the 'aid' was instead a declaration of war. Dissapointed though Nasir was at such a misunderstanding, he still ordered his men forward so as to liberate the Timurid nation from the rebels currently plaguing the nation. Admittedly said rebels were non-existant but Nasir was happy to overlook this small technicality, so desperate was he to justify sending the Timurids aid.
In little time the Timurid lands, which had been slowly recovering after decades of warfare and rebellion, were once again filled with loot hungry soldiers intent on destruction. After little more than a year Nasir was being brought the great news that his aid mission had proved a resounding success.
Nasir had been left very happy as a result of this war-of this mission of aid. He had found it especially gratifying when Uways had broken down in tears as the peace treaty between both nations was being decided. Nasir was in no doubt the tears were those of joy from Uways, delighted as he no doubt was that he had such a helpful and selfless member of family ever willing to aid him and his nation.
After the peace treaty was signed, and a sobbing Uways led away to a darkened room, Nasir had met with Hemant complaining that the next mission required the creation of a fleet. As Khandesh's current navy consisted of pedalos, fishing boats and kayaks Nasir was in no doubt it was more than strong enough to defeat her enemies on the oceans without more ships being required. He thus demanded of Hemant a new mission. Scurrying to obey, Hemant rushed off to sort out a new mission to better satisfy his warmongering master.
Feeling rather perplexed by this new mission, Khandesh had just recently fought to defend Punjab after all, Nasir was nonetheless happy for another excuse to gain land. Thanking Hemant for some sterling work in acquiring this new casus belli, war was quickly declared upon the faithful and peace lovin-uh, the warmongering and despotic nation of Pubjab once again.
1 November 1477
Vikas slowly shuffled towards Nasir, who was busy examing various types of grass in the splendid palace gardens in the hope that one type would prove useful in the creation of a wig. Having noted Nasir's displeasure at his slow speech, Vikas had brought along a useful reinforcement and translator in the shape of Tushar. After haltingly greeting Nasir, and thus covering him in phlegm, Vikas ushered Tushar forward to speak on his behalf.
"Good afternoon...uh...cousi-no, uhm, uncle?" Nasir greeted Tushar distractedly whilst wiping his face with a towel.
"Exactly so, sire, greetings."
"So what brings you here today? Wait, you haven't near bankrupted the nation again have you?!" Nasir suddenly demanded.
"Oh no, sire, no. And I resent the notion that I have ever near bankrupted the nation. I simply briefly mislaid the state funds last month."
"Yes, mislaid them in your personal vault."
"A small mistake, sire, a small mistake. Anyway, both myself and Vikas are here today because I..." At this Vikas issued a threatening cough, "...uh, that is to say, we, have a rather interesting proposition for you."
"Oh, well, pray continue."
"As you know, sire, we recently uncovered a nation of heathens on the western borders of the realm."
"We've just found out..." At this Vikas moved a bit closer to Tushar whilst coughing more pointedly, "...or rather, Vikas has just found out that this nation of infidels is rather weak..."
"Declare war upon them immediately! We do this so that we can free the oppressed people of...of...where was it again?"
"Right. We shall free the oppressed people of Georgia from the tyrannical rule they have suffered for far too long! And, rather more importantly, we shall free the wallets and purses of the oppressed people of Georgia, so that we may tax them to the hilt and begin robbing them blind!"
"Inspirational stuff, sire."
12 January 1479
Despite having been confident when ordering the declaration of war against Georgia, Nasir was soon assailed by doubts. Georgia was a western nation, as such she enjoyed considerable technological advantages when compared to Khandesh. Admittedly her armies had nothing to compare with Khandesh's vaunted faux realistic iron swords madeoutofwood and grey painted cloth 'metal' armour, Georgia instead preferring to equip her forces with iron swords madeoutofiron alongside chainmail and plate armour for some reason. Despite this advantage in equipment, Nasir continued to worry, this war would prove a true test for Khandesh's armed forces.
Thus Nasir was feeling horribly apprehensive when finally he spotted a messenger approaching him with news from the west.
His confidence returning once more, Nasir blithely assured everyone that he had not doubted this outcome for a second. He made this assurance whilst quietly informing a messenger that the treasury could now be returned to the capital and his escape horse returned to the palace stables. These measures having been taken in the unlikely event of a Khandeshi defeat, in which case Nasir had been more than ready to bravely abandon the capital and beg for sanctuary in another nation. Not that Nasir had thought such a defeat possible for a second of course.
15 January 1479
Nasir was soon left very glad he had received such promising news from the west as Hemant quickly brought him some altogether more worrying information.
Worrying that is until Nasir was told that Gondwana had a mere 3,000 men under arms. Dismissing the threat, Nasir did still ask what had provoked Gondwana into declaring war upon Khandesh. Hemant explained that Nitin had become rather overzealous whilst touring the country with the portable well and had strayed into Gondwana. Numerous terrified Gondwana peasants later and war had been declared.
Nasir felt himself sinking into gloom at this further evidence of incompetence from one of his ministers. Thankfully that gloom was soon lifted by further details brought from this new front. The despicable Gondwanese forces were being blocked in their advance into Khandeshi territory by brave Khandeshi peasants, no doubt moved to fight the invaders due to their great love for Nasir.
This was rather stretching things. Truly these 'brave Khandeshi peasants', far from being moved to defend Khandesh from the Gondwanese incursion, were actually rebels who despised Nasir's rule, declaring him an inept and cruel tyrant for some reason. Wounded as Nasir was by these insults, he found it impossible that anyone would consider him cruel, he was happy to overlook the slurs provided the traitorous rebel scum-uh, that is, the brave Khandeshi patriots continued to fight Gondwana's forces.
1 February 1480
Relaxing with a game of 'Kick the Cartographer', Nasir was once again feeling at ease. The wars were progressing well on all fronts, Georgia and Punjab having little left to resist Khandesh's all-conquering armies, whilst the impertinent Gondwana was already begging for peace term. Life felt good for Nasir. It was then with some alarm that he noticed a messenger approaching, dodging blubbering cartographers as he did so. With some foreboding Nasir accepted the scroll from the man.
"Oh. For some reason I thought this would be bad news."
An excerpt from Khandesh: You Now Regret Buying This Book
Khandesh agreed peace with Punjab in 24 March 1480, Punjab's bewildered armies having been caught unawares by their attack from a supposed ally, she had been left with little chance to resist the Khandeshi juggernaut. Surrendering three provinces to Khandesh Pubjab was left a horribly weakened one province minor and Khandesh left a nation proud of her ability to conquer smaller peace loving foes.
With this peace treaty Khandesh had accomplished another of her goals, the conquest of the province of Kohistan. The next mission assigned to Khandesh was the vassalisation of the small non-aggressive Baluchistan. However it would take quite some time before this small nation could be crushed and subjected to tyrannical, that is enlightened, Faruqi rule.