Crusading 101: Deus quæ vult?

[LlywelynII]

[size=+4]CRUSADING 101[/size][size=+2]:
Deus quæ vult?[/size]

_________________________________________________

[size=+1]"Do not the heathen say: 'Where is their God?'
Nor do I wonder, for the sons of the Church, those who bear the label 'Christian,' have been laid low in the desert
and have either been slain by the sword or consumed by famine." — St. Bernard, 1148[/size]

_________________________________________________​

[size=+1]Course Description[/size]:

In consideration of the success CSK of Bohemia's guide to earthly rule has enjoyed, Holy Mother Church, in her wisdom, has contracted the University of Bologna to offer this correspondence course to various leaders throughout Christendom in preparation for the coming crusade against the pagan lord Saladinus, lately victorious at Hattan.​

[size=+1]Course Objectives[/size]:

The recovery of the Holy Land, to be achieved through the improvement and education of our Crusaders.​

[size=+1]Course Topics[/size]:

TBA​

[size=+1]Texts & Required Supplies[/size]:

This textbook
Breviary, use of the Roman Curia*
De re militari, by Vegetius
Codex Justinianus,*
Digestæ,*
Authenticæ,* and
Institutiones Justinianus,* by Justinian
Crusader Kings, patched to 1.05
The Kings' Crusade (1188) Scenario [download here]

*available from the University scriptorium

Suggested Supplementary Materials:
Ulfberht or Damask sword
Hauberk
Charger
Deus Vult, 2.1b (X.15)
DV Improvement Project​

[size=+1]Grading[/size]:

The course will initially be graded on a pass/fail basis. Should Jerusalem remain in pagan hands a century from now, everyone in the course will be damned for all eternity.

As the Lord will doubtless provide for victory, everyone should pass and the course will then be graded according to the piety and good works of the students and their descendants to the month of January in the year of our Lord 1450.

Extra credit is available to those donating their class notes to the library's Crusader vicipædia.​

[size=+1]Enrollment[/size]:

Enrollment is by request, posting in this forum. Enrollment will remain open throughout the length of the course.

Enrollment is open to all Catholics acknowledged by the Holy See as at least a count or local equivalent. Enrollment to eastern Schismatics and to heretics is also available via special papal dispensation.

All students must either be literate or pay to have a cleric appointed to them.​

[size=+1]Rules of Conduct[/size]:

VH/Weakling.
No reloads except owing to Acts of God.​

​

 

[LlywelynII]

[size=+3]Course Syllabus[/size]​

[size=+2]Januar[/size]
​

[size=+1]Snipsday[/size]: Introductions (Character sheet & traits; editing & creating characters, marriages, &c.)
[size=+1]Childermas Octave[/size]: Introductions (Provinces, structures, & conditions; editing provinces)
[size=+1]Kingsday[/size]: Legalities (Inheritance: peculiarities & elective law; ruling a pagan, republican, or ecclesiastical realm)
[size=+1]Snipsday Octave[/size]: (Class cancelled)
[size=+1]St. Hyginy's Day[/size]: Legalities (Inheritance: biology, salic law, & gavelkind)
[size=+1]Kingsday Octave[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]Hermitsday[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]Plough Lunday[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Agnes' Eve[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Vincent's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Dwynwen's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. John Goldmouth's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Gildas' Day[/size]: TBA

[size=+2]Shortmonth[/size]
​

[size=+1]Candlemas[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Blaise's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Agatha's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]Candlemas Octave[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Scholastica's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]Prid. Id.[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Faustin's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Curig's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Barbas' Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]Chairsday[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Matthew's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]V Kal.[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Dewi's Eve[/size]: TBA

[size=+2]Marth[/size]
​

[size=+1]Ash Mercherday[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Hadrian's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Perpetua's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]Martyrsday[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Constantine's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]Prid. Id.[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Patrick's Eve[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Edward Martyr's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Benedict's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Gwinear's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]Lady Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]V Kal.[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]Laddersday[/size]: TBA

[size=+2]Abril[/size]
​

[size=+1]St. Tewdrig's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]Prid. Non.[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Prudence's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Madryn's Eve[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]Paschal Holiday[/size] (No class)


​

 

[LlywelynII]

[size=+2]Abril[/size]
​

[size=+1]St. George's Eve[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]The Greater Rogation[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Anastasy's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Hugh's Day[/size]: TBA

[size=+2]Boldane[/size]
​

[size=+1]St. Athanasy's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Monica's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]Ante Portam Lat.[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]VII Id.[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Tudec's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Sulien's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Carannog's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Potamon's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Ethelbert's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Julia's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]X Kal.[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Urban's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]Pope John's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]Gang Lunday[/size]: TBA

[size=+2]Midsummer[/size]
​

[size=+1]Gang Merchersday[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Clotild's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Gulval's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Syria's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Landry's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Dymphna's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Trillo's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Nectan's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Silvery's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Alban's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]Midsummer's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]V Kal.[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]Peter & Paul's Day[/size]: TBA

[size=+2]Jule[/size]
​

[size=+1]Kalends[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Odo's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Noyale's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Urith's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Pius' Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Cletus' Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]St. Swithin's Day[/size]: TBA
[size=+1]Summer Holiday[/size] (No class)
​

 

[TempestDK]

hehe ... ready and waiting

 

[Landwalker]

I love it. And man, I can't even imagine the Corpus Iuris Civilis being required reading... even in small print in modern books, that thing is about two feet thick. I spend entirely too much time with that my senior year of college (honors thesis on Justinian. Good times). I'll certainly be following along with this to see how it goes, and who knows, maybe I'll enroll. ;p

Cheers.

 

[phargle]

Dong.

 

[OutsiderSubtype]

The trick isn't taking Jerusalem, the trick is keeping it.

 

[Murmurandus]

I might join if there's enough fun and profit in the crusading...

 

[ssj18vegeta]

I wonder how this turns out.. It sounds good

 

[LlywelynII]

[size=+4]Lesson One[/size][size=+2]:
Introductions[/size]

_________________________________________________


[size=+1]"Know thyself." — St. Clement, c. 210[/size]

_________________________________________________​

[size=+1]Getting to Know You[/size]:

Most of you should have scrolls similar to the one below:

Please fill it in with all the information that will be pertinent to the class. That includes: name, epithet or patronymic (if any), family or clan name, year of birth, age, titles held, titles claimed, ethnicity, religion, coat of arms, portrait, current ready gold, portrait of your current liege (ia), level of satisfaction with liege (ia), and portraits of your vassals (ia) in order of loyalty, parents (if known) father first, siblings (ik) in order of age brothers first, spouse(s) (ia) in reverse order of acquisition, children (ia) in order of age sons first, current formal allies (ia), living friends (ia) in order of acquisition, living enemies (ia) in order of acquisition, current successors (ia) in order of succession, and current court members (ia) in order of acquisition.

I cannot stress this enough: Please do not draw the portraits yourself. Use a professionally-trained court artist.

That should leave a number of blanks at the top. The first of these is for Prestige, your fame and respect among your fellow Christian lords. For now, we will give you the benefit of the doubt and assign most of you 100 points — about the equivalent of having governed a mid-sized kingdom for a few years. Similarly, with Piety, your fame and respect within the Church, most of you will begin the course with 100 points — about the equivalent of having been an archbishop for a few years.

The next part is somewhat trickier.

The remaining four slots are for a self-assessment of your abilities in the fields of warfare and governance, particularly in diplomacy, intrigue, and stewardship. This Martial skill is not a ranking of personal prowess in arms but of your abilities as a general of men and an administrator of armies. It includes equal measures strategic thought, tactical thought, mastery of logistics, and personal charisma. Excellence here connotes larger than standard levies and victory on the field. The Diplomacy skill is a ranking of your ability in eloquence and persuasion. It includes the etiquette, empathy, and education needed to interact successfully with your peers, vassals, and court. Excellence here provides loyalty and able students. The Intrigue skill is a ranking of your ability to understand and note the work of Satan and bad men, along with literacy. It is not sneakiness per se — battlefield trickery falls under Martial; fast-talking under Diplomacy; defrauding under Stewardship. Instead, excellence here grants you the ability to avoid all the pitfalls and snares of the Enemy, as well as proficiency in personal administration of your realm. The Stewardship skill is a ranking of your ability to handle your realm's finances. Much of this is the patience to simply go over the ledgers yourself, but it also includes finding new sources for taxation, creating new sources of taxation, and limiting corruption regarding taxation. Excellence here also tends to establish justice and order throughout one's realm.

Naturally, your first instinct is to fill everything in with the largest number you know how to write (viz., "over MMM!") but the failure of the last Crusade — based as it was upon hoping very, very hard that nice things would happen to good people — has reminded the Church that the Lord has arranged this world as He has for His Purpose and that it is vanity to ignore the state of things as they are when we wish to change them. Therefore, in all things during this course, seek first to know and understand things as they truly are. As you are nor Charlemagne (M21) nor Pope Gregory VII (D17) nor a Swedish woman (I16) nor Alexios the Greek (S16), so let you lower your sights from them. An average score should be 6. A 4 or lower shows ineptitude. A 7, excellence. A 14, mastery.

There is also Health and Fertility and BadBoy, but the last of these starts at 0 and the first two we'll send around a doctor to find out.

Afterwards, provide your scroll to your confessor to annotate with your virtues, vices, traits, and education, using the icons below:

​

​

Pope St. Gregory I ordained 7 Heavenly Virtues provided by Grace for the soul's salvation: These are Chastity, Temperance, Charity, vigorous Diligence, Forgiveness, Kindness, and Humility. Following the Lateran Councils and the examples of our Lord and many saints, many have also lately dedicated themselves to Celibacy, rather than simple Chastity. Study of Plato adds to the Heavenly Virtues the pagan ones of Wisdom, Justice, and Valor. The Godly valorous who pledge themselves to the Cross are Crusaders. Among his Christian Virtues, St. Ambrose lists zealous Faith. Finally, Solomon the Wise in his book of Proverbs tells us that the Lord looks kindly upon both Honesty and Mercy.

Against these, the 7 Deadly Sins removing a person from Holy Grace are Lust, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, vengeful Wrath, Envy, and Pride. Against Plato's virtues may be placed the vices of Recklessness, Caprice, and Cowardice. Against Ambrose's, Skepticism. Against Solomon's, Deceitfulness and wanton Cruelty.

​

A few items of importance under Canon Law: First, if you are Friedrich von Hohenstaufen, make note of the fact that you are the current Emperor of the Romans. The next two do not apply to any living men but are worth noting as a goal: the first is Beatified which indicates a local cult approved by the bishop; since 1170, however, it has been necessary to secure papal approval before any declaration of the blessed figure as a proper Saint. Fourth is a marker to denote a Civil War where a vassal has questioned the legitimacy of your title(s). The fifth denotes Bastardy. Sixth, while Kinslaying is not treated separately from murder under the law, it is quite reviled in society, particularly by your other relatives. The last two denote Heresy (espousal of a belief condemned by church council or papal decree) and Excommunication (removal from the church by episcopal or papal decree).

​

These are various important Health Problems. Stutter and Lisp can be somewhat serious, as they impact other's respect for you. Stress reduces your performance and can worsen into other complaints, such as suicidal Despair. Madness is not quite so bad as Possession, although either can cause maniacal homicide. Should more than one of your parents' grandparents be identical, you will likely be Inbred. Other curses inherited from your parents' sins include Hairlip, Clubfoot, and Hunchback. Blindness can be caused by various factors including combat. Serious Illness, Parasites, Leprosy, and Serious Injury are unpleasant enough to endure, though Consumption and Plague are worse.

​

These are the degrees of Education. In the church: Novice, Priest, Monk, Scholar, Theologian. In the field: Squire, Soldier, Knight, Tactician, Strategist. At court: After service as a Page, one specializes. In foreign service: Boor, Braggart, Negotiator, Statesman. At court: Fool, Schemer, Plotter, Mastermind. In business: Spendthrift, Merchant, Bureaucrat, Midas.

​

These last are miscellaneous Personality Traits. They are not virtues or vices, necessarily, but some are mutually exclusive and they can be important. The first pair are Parental Upbringing (a child personally reared by his father) and Fosterling (a child boarding at another court than his father's). Second is Trusting and Suspicious. Loyalist is generally taken to be more honorable than Rebel, but there much depends upon the nature of your liege. Weak-Willed and Stubborn are both off-putting. Romantic and Pragmatic are simply different ways of seeing the world: as it might become or as it certainly is. Gregarious and Shy are both charming in their different ways, although both can be inappropriate for kings. The last is the marker for a child Prodigy.​

[size=+1]Example[/size]:

As an example, here is a sample scroll already filled in by one of your classmates:

​

​

[size=+1]Review Questions[/size]:

1. Which skill is the most useful for rulers?
2. For courtiers?
3. King* Donnel rules only one province. The province is poor, full of Irishmen, and under the capricious
hand of the Angevins. What advantages does the O Briain court have to address these problems?
4. Seriously. Without using a search engine, what's 5,000 in Roman numerals? 50,000?
5. If your twelve-year-old were going to design your coat of arms, what would s/he draw on it?

*Irish for "Count."​

​

 

[LlywelynII]

Breeding

No longer works in DV, so don't bother. The only hereditary traits remaining are fertility and health, and all others rise randomly each year and potentially fall off suddenly in the late teens (particularly with DVIP or TASS.)

Parental education does have an effect, but only on the children's education.

​

Hidden Stats

A potential spouse's health and fertility may be approximately determined in-game by looking at her siblings, her father's siblings, and her mother's siblings. Many brothers and sisters suggest a high fertility; many relatives dying during their childhood suggests a low health score.

In the save game, the stats have been oddly switched in DV. Fertility is the first number in the list; health the second. BB is impersonal and kept with the realm information, but we'll talk about that later.

​

Scoring

The current game score (f1) and the final one are computed based on only your current ruler. To compute a score based upon your entire dynasty, you will need to save your game and use Kinniken's DynasticGlory application.

It also computes an individual score called "chivalry," based on your character's approximation (or rejection) of medieval courtly ideals and knightly virtue.

​

Traits

For a full explanation of the effects of all traits, see Gratianus's CK Help File. It was written for 1.05 but is still (almost completely?) accurate.

You can also look in your CK directory. Trait information (including how certain traits interact with others to affect loyalty) is in /db/traits.txt.

​

Vista...

Is of the Devil. But most of your problems will go away if you move your (entire) CK directory out of the program files directory and onto your desktop.

The remaining confusions mostly occur because some of the files are designated "read only" by default. You simply have to right click the offending file and uncheck this attribute under preferences.
​

 

[LlywelynII]

@Mr. Tempest: Glad you could sit in!
@Mr. Walker: That does sound interesting. What was your thesis?
@Mr. Phargle: Stop making strange noises.
@Mr. Subtype: Quite. All the same, first, we'll worry about taking it.
@Mr. Andus: When is crusading not fun? Profitable, you'd have to talk to the Venetians about. Almost always more money in opening the general store than in being a prospector yourself.
@Mr. Vegeta: Pleasure to have you.

 

[Landwalker]

@Mr. Walker: That does sound interesting. What was your thesis?

A monstrosity of an examination of the governing principles and foundations behind Justinian's imperial ideology in his campaigns of reconquest in the west (mostly Africa and Italy, though I touched on Spain). Internal and external politics, religion (snuffing out heretics and all that), belief that he was still the leader of a Roman Empire and that it was his duty to restore that empire to the glory of his predecessors, and the like. It was definitely interesting, but that didn't make the Corpus Iuris Civilis any less of a beast.

I love how this is shaping up. Definitely looking forward to seeing what's in store.

Cheers.

 

[TempestDK]

hehe ... I love your opening

Just a little worried that the writing form you use might be a bit much for people who do not master english that well.

... and as far as I know (without looking) there is no numeral above M, so 5000 would be MMMMM and 50.000 would be MMMMMMMMM... well you get the point

And my 12-year old child (if I had one) would make something truly awesome ... well it couldn't be much worse than c279 (Lappland) which looks like it was made by a 7-year old neanderthal

 

[OutsiderSubtype]

I would say that for rulers Intrigue is most useful. The ruler's personal Intrigue score, unmodified by that of the court's spymaster, determines how many provinces the ruler can reasonably govern. And all temporal power - money, soldiers, and prestige - flows from provinces. Finally, resisting the work of Satan seems like a good thing.

For courtiers, I would say that it is most important to have at least one with good Stewardship. A good court steward can provide the funds necessary for improving provinces, buying your vassals' loyalty, and moving troops over long distances to Outremer. Further, combined ruler/steward Stewarship score is what determines the maximum size of the regiments of troops that can be raised from provinces in the ruler's personal demense. You'll need a lot of men to conquer the Holy Land.

 

[Landwalker]

For Rulers, I almost always consider Intrigue to be the most important attribute, for the reasons Outsider pointed out -- more Intrigue = More Demesne Provinces. It's also a major factor in some of the "gaining claims" events that are so important on high difficulties (to expound on this: Intrigue of at least 7, 10, or 13 lowers the MTTH of those events by 15%, 25%, and 50% respectively, while having Intrigue of less than 3 doubles the MTTH).

For Courtiers, I say Diplomacy. You only need one courtier with really good Diplomacy, but all of your courtiers/advisors need at least good (7 or greater) Diplomacy for purposes of education / raising your ruler's snot-nosed little brats properly. The same does not apply to any other attribute (your court chancellor can be awful at Martial, Stewardship, and Intrigue, but your court Steward needs to be at least competent at Diplomacy in addition to Stewardship).

Cheers.

 

[phargle]

I am tempted to submit a report card, but I am afraid of not loading up EU3 to play Morocco. OTOH, I did just run 1.05 the other day to play the Seljuks. Tempting, tempting.

 

[crusaderknight]

This is amazing, Llywelyn! I will definately keep an eye on this one!

 

[Cecasander]

This looks very interesting. I laughed very hard at the Suggested Supplementary Materials, trying to imagine a lecture hall full of students dressed in chain mail, wearing a surcoat with a cross, all sitting on war horses.

I think intrigue would be the best stats for rulers, maybe combined with martial if you're a warmonger. As for courtier, I'd say stewardship, diplomacy, martial, intrigue, in that order.

 

[LlywelynII]

[size=+2]Departmental Memo[/size]​

[size=+1]Date[/size]: 1188, Snipsday​

[size=+1]Ad[/size]: Assistante Abdulisa Avenvalid
[size=+1]De[/size]: Professore Leolino da Galles
[size=+1]Re[/size]: CRUS101, first week​

Hello, welcome, and congratulations upon being accepted by the University to the prestigious post of professor's assistant! I hear that you are quite knowledgeable and generous enough to have your father donate all those books to the library and to pay full out-of-state tuition.

A gentleman and a scholar. I heartily salute you.

To brass tacks:

1. Your desk, office, and sleeping quarters can be found beneath the alchemical laboratory in the steam pipe trunk distribution venue. I have heard that Marocum is quite civilized, but here you are advised to carry your knife with you everywhere, particularly during Rush Week. If anyone troubles you about your prayer rug or pagan idols, simply explain it as research and refer them to the bursar's office who will handle the matter for you.

2. It is my understanding that both white lead and quicksilver are excellent skin-whiteners. Should you befriend any of the alchemists working above you, I am sure they would be happy to provide you some for a nominal fee.

3. In this course, we will be dealing principally with the rulers and lords of Christendom. In other words, morons. We in the faculty are all still poring over the books you brought in and I think, freed from distraction, I can make real progress on the problem of Universals. This week I had to deal with the students myself: I do not want this error repeated. Your desk has a copy of my signet: use it.

4. Since our students will be only passingly literate, expect their correspondence to have numerous errors of spelling and syntax. Be sure to correct them before presenting any papers to my office.

To illustrate the procedure:

​

Consultation with the archives will inform you that this idiot not only misspelled his own name, he forgot to include his rightful titles as "King" of Tuadmumu and Munster. If we fix that for him, though, he might rebel against his lord and oppose English rule in Ireland. Since that has the Pope's blessing, we'll stay out of it for now. Just make a note of it with Registrar or Student Union.

To correct his name, open your ledger for this year. Consult your list of ISO designated realm codes. Here we are dealing with C012. Search for it.

​

Here dna is Italian for Portrait Identification Number. (We might fix that later, too: he's certainly not much to look at.) Now, search your ledger for this dna. It's usually far more unique than a name.

​

And here is his record. Get out your ink, sand, and penknife: etch out the name and replace it with the proper one Dómhnaill Mór or Domnall Mor. Insight into our students, there: give him three hills and a cow and he calls himself "World-Ruler the Great" in whatever language he's managed to acquire. The attribute line is his martial, diplomacy, intrigue, and stewardship, fertility, and health. Don't worry about the long number after that: it seems to be librarian or archival gibberish.

If Domnall even is lord at Ossory, it's through his mother, the daughter of the last "king" there. Rather ungrateful of him to omit her. To correct this, make an entry for her in the margin beside his. Her name was Sadb nic Donnchad, same province, maybe 20 or 30 years older. Set all her attributes at 5. We'll leave out her family but give her a unique (ie, big) number and make sure to include her as his mother. Her clan is the mac Gillápadraig: dust off your dynasties .txtbook and look for "mac Gil" to make sure you don't miss any variant spellings. Include a death date: he obviously doesn't want to be bothered with her. Use this guide if you want to change her portrait around: just be sure to include all 14 digits.

​

Finally, since we assume she was actually married to his father at the time of conception (not that you ever know with Celts, admittedly), search upwards for "marrige" (don't ask why, just spell it that way). Using the same format you see there, write a marrige certificate for these two, husband first. You see that you can use the same format for editing friendships and enmities as those come and go.

​

There are some other amusing errors spread out among his family, but it's not important to include them if no one is ever going to check. Just make a note in the appropriate place if it bugs you. And there, something fit to be submitted:

​

5. Over the next week or so I need you to come up with a lesson plan for the rest of the semester, including a detailed invasion plan of Fatimid Judea and/or Egypt, culminating in the conquest of Jerusalem. Leave a copy in my box and distribute the rest to the students. Also, be sure to pick up and drop off my robes each Saturnday: The faculty all use the washerwoman by the Asinelli.

6. While I know that names can be personal matters, you might consider changing what you call yourself. Going by a name ending in -a might cause the Italians to confuse you for a woman, which business can only end badly.​

​