If only spies in game could sap these teleporters. The espionage tree might be more useful.
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Conversations that must have happened in Eu4
- Thread starter Vordeo
- Start date
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If only spies in game could sap these teleporters. The espionage tree might be more useful.
In the restored and expanded Great Palace of Constantinople...
Megas Basileus kai Autokrator Alexandros XI: "It is good to be Basileus, my dear."
Basilissa Theodora: "Yes, dear."
MB&A: "Delightful to be sipping tea grown in our Indian provinces, sweetened with sugar from our Caribbean islands, served in porcelain cups from our artisans in China."
B: "And all in the comfort of our little home on the Bosphorus. Have a spiced biscuit, too, my eyes."
A pinkernes hands the Basileus his biscuits. Even in this scene of homely informality, the Emperor of the Romans and his wife are attended by twenty court officials, plus the guards.
MB&A: "Why, I think I will, my darling lambikins." <sighs> "I wonder how our campaign against those Frankish barbarians is progressing."
B: "I'm sure it's fine, my baclava."
Suddenly, in a plop of displaced air, the Megas Domestikos appears, startling a poor spatharokoubikoularios.
MD: <Prostrates himself three times> "Hail, Emperor of the Romans! Long live the Emperor! May the Isapostolos be blessed!"
MB&A: "Oh, hello, Euphemios. We were just talking about you. How is our little war going?"
MDs: <Trembling despite his inherent military dignity> "Ill, o Hyperprotopanporphyrogennetos!"
MB&A: "What?!" <Shocked, he rises from his throne, forgetting that it was in levitation mode, and stumbles before he rights himself.> "How is that possible?"
MDs: "O Hyperprotopanporphyrogennetos" <Draws a breath> "Our armies fought valiantly against the forces of the Franks and routed them, sieging their fortresses and taking their last provinces."
B: "Dear Euphemios" <She eyes him appreciatively, for he is a fine figure of a general, with all the right stats> "Then all must be well?"
MDs: "O Basilissa, great in virtue, whose beauty outshines Helen, whose wisdom -"
MB&A: "Skip the pleasantries, man! Tell us what happened."
MDs: "Our campaign was going well, O Hyperproto -" <draws a breath> "panporphyrogennetos. But we needed to remove the Franks' allies from the war in order to enforce our demands. That was when we encountered problems."
MB&A: "Oh." <Presses the button to lower his his throne and sits on it, and then levitates again> "How so?"
MDs: "Our scouts reported a wondrous nation, O thrice-blessed Emperor. I would never have believed it had I not seen it with my own eyes."
MB&A: "And it was...? And you can skip the titles, I said."
MDs: "Very well, sire. It was on a scouting confirmation trip to the even more barbarous nation of Normandy that I first realised we might have problems."
The anticipation in the air is hyperpropalpable.
MB&A: "Normandy? Normandy... aren't they the little duchy that hasn't fought a war in countless generations, except in self-defence?"
MDs: "Yes, sire."
B: "But remember, dear, that your father always said that he envied their rulers, past and present, their stats. 'Such diplomats, such administrators, such military men,' he used to say."
MB&A: "I remember something like that. Proceed, Megas Domestikos!"
MDs: "Normandy is a province of wonders, sire, the like of which, I am ashamed to say, not even the Empire possesses! Caen, their capital, outshines the City!"
MB&A: <Checks himself before standing up> "How is this possible?"
MDs: "I do not know, sire."
MB&A: "Our Empire reaches across the globe! From here to China and thence to the New World and thence to Africa. My subjects are innumerable! The City has long since expanded even beyond the walls built by my great-grandfather. Chrysopolis and Chalcedon together, even those mean suburbs, are greater in population than that of the City at the time of Justinian!"
All the officials nod vigorously, agreeing with the Emperor.
MDs: "And yet, O Hyperprotopanporphyrogennetos, Caen is larger and more glorious still! Even their towns have towers and walls and barracks that reach to the skies! Worse, their armies were far larger than we expected, greater than those of the so-called king of the Franks, greater - I am told - than that of the so-called King of the Anglish barbarians. Our weary soldiers were killed or beaten back in disarray."
The entire court gasps.
MDs: "We will win this war, sire. But it will take many more men that we thought necessary."
MB&A: <Looks across his court> "Can anyone tell me how this might have come to pass?"
A pause. A little later, the pinkernes approaches bashfully.
P: "I have an idea, O Isapostolos..."
MB&A: "Well?"
P: "Well, all it really requires is common sense..."
Megas Basileus kai Autokrator Alexandros XI: "It is good to be Basileus, my dear."
Basilissa Theodora: "Yes, dear."
MB&A: "Delightful to be sipping tea grown in our Indian provinces, sweetened with sugar from our Caribbean islands, served in porcelain cups from our artisans in China."
B: "And all in the comfort of our little home on the Bosphorus. Have a spiced biscuit, too, my eyes."
A pinkernes hands the Basileus his biscuits. Even in this scene of homely informality, the Emperor of the Romans and his wife are attended by twenty court officials, plus the guards.
MB&A: "Why, I think I will, my darling lambikins." <sighs> "I wonder how our campaign against those Frankish barbarians is progressing."
B: "I'm sure it's fine, my baclava."
Suddenly, in a plop of displaced air, the Megas Domestikos appears, startling a poor spatharokoubikoularios.
MD: <Prostrates himself three times> "Hail, Emperor of the Romans! Long live the Emperor! May the Isapostolos be blessed!"
MB&A: "Oh, hello, Euphemios. We were just talking about you. How is our little war going?"
MDs: <Trembling despite his inherent military dignity> "Ill, o Hyperprotopanporphyrogennetos!"
MB&A: "What?!" <Shocked, he rises from his throne, forgetting that it was in levitation mode, and stumbles before he rights himself.> "How is that possible?"
MDs: "O Hyperprotopanporphyrogennetos" <Draws a breath> "Our armies fought valiantly against the forces of the Franks and routed them, sieging their fortresses and taking their last provinces."
B: "Dear Euphemios" <She eyes him appreciatively, for he is a fine figure of a general, with all the right stats> "Then all must be well?"
MDs: "O Basilissa, great in virtue, whose beauty outshines Helen, whose wisdom -"
MB&A: "Skip the pleasantries, man! Tell us what happened."
MDs: "Our campaign was going well, O Hyperproto -" <draws a breath> "panporphyrogennetos. But we needed to remove the Franks' allies from the war in order to enforce our demands. That was when we encountered problems."
MB&A: "Oh." <Presses the button to lower his his throne and sits on it, and then levitates again> "How so?"
MDs: "Our scouts reported a wondrous nation, O thrice-blessed Emperor. I would never have believed it had I not seen it with my own eyes."
MB&A: "And it was...? And you can skip the titles, I said."
MDs: "Very well, sire. It was on a scouting confirmation trip to the even more barbarous nation of Normandy that I first realised we might have problems."
The anticipation in the air is hyperpropalpable.
MB&A: "Normandy? Normandy... aren't they the little duchy that hasn't fought a war in countless generations, except in self-defence?"
MDs: "Yes, sire."
B: "But remember, dear, that your father always said that he envied their rulers, past and present, their stats. 'Such diplomats, such administrators, such military men,' he used to say."
MB&A: "I remember something like that. Proceed, Megas Domestikos!"
MDs: "Normandy is a province of wonders, sire, the like of which, I am ashamed to say, not even the Empire possesses! Caen, their capital, outshines the City!"
MB&A: <Checks himself before standing up> "How is this possible?"
MDs: "I do not know, sire."
MB&A: "Our Empire reaches across the globe! From here to China and thence to the New World and thence to Africa. My subjects are innumerable! The City has long since expanded even beyond the walls built by my great-grandfather. Chrysopolis and Chalcedon together, even those mean suburbs, are greater in population than that of the City at the time of Justinian!"
All the officials nod vigorously, agreeing with the Emperor.
MDs: "And yet, O Hyperprotopanporphyrogennetos, Caen is larger and more glorious still! Even their towns have towers and walls and barracks that reach to the skies! Worse, their armies were far larger than we expected, greater than those of the so-called king of the Franks, greater - I am told - than that of the so-called King of the Anglish barbarians. Our weary soldiers were killed or beaten back in disarray."
The entire court gasps.
MDs: "We will win this war, sire. But it will take many more men that we thought necessary."
MB&A: <Looks across his court> "Can anyone tell me how this might have come to pass?"
A pause. A little later, the pinkernes approaches bashfully.
P: "I have an idea, O Isapostolos..."
MB&A: "Well?"
P: "Well, all it really requires is common sense..."
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I hope OPM having most developed provinces in the world is now historic anomaly (after 1.13)
Adviser to New Chinese Emperor: Most honorable Emperor of the Middle Kingdom, I humbly present to you the revenue log of all the Celestial Empire
New Chinese Emperor: Ah glorious, our ministers are no doubt expert tax collectors, I have seen the studious nature of our Imperial Examination
Adviser: Well my Emperor, half of our income goes to the local lords who maintain the provinces on our behalf
Emperor: .... Lords you say? No doubt we exercise direct control over all land in the Empire, and our Imperial Examination fixed problems centuries ago with hereditary nobles
Adviser: Well, these men from Sweden came and made a very convincing case to adopt European style governance in 1444
Emperor: .....
Adviser: ....
Emperor: Moving on, I am hoping to wipe out the Wako threat from Japan with direct military force as my first act
Adviser: Ah, our loyal ally of Korea is willing to h-
Emperor: Ally, you mean Tributary right?
Adviser: No, ally, we realized that all nations around us are equal to us and have the right to be treated as a true nation not barbarians
Emperor: Those men from Sweden again?
Adviser: They were very convincing
Emperor: *Sigh* Well, at least the Imperial Concubines are plentiful
Adviser: Ah, yes sir, but only one is fertile, the Swedes found it unfair for us to have....
Emperor: Any more Swedes enter the country are to be boiled alive.....
New Chinese Emperor: Ah glorious, our ministers are no doubt expert tax collectors, I have seen the studious nature of our Imperial Examination
Adviser: Well my Emperor, half of our income goes to the local lords who maintain the provinces on our behalf
Emperor: .... Lords you say? No doubt we exercise direct control over all land in the Empire, and our Imperial Examination fixed problems centuries ago with hereditary nobles
Adviser: Well, these men from Sweden came and made a very convincing case to adopt European style governance in 1444
Emperor: .....
Adviser: ....
Emperor: Moving on, I am hoping to wipe out the Wako threat from Japan with direct military force as my first act
Adviser: Ah, our loyal ally of Korea is willing to h-
Emperor: Ally, you mean Tributary right?
Adviser: No, ally, we realized that all nations around us are equal to us and have the right to be treated as a true nation not barbarians
Emperor: Those men from Sweden again?
Adviser: They were very convincing
Emperor: *Sigh* Well, at least the Imperial Concubines are plentiful
Adviser: Ah, yes sir, but only one is fertile, the Swedes found it unfair for us to have....
Emperor: Any more Swedes enter the country are to be boiled alive.....
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Advisor: It has come to our attention that our second army is about to engage the enemy, yet it has no leader, my lord.
King: No leader you say? How big is the enemies army?
Advisor: About the same size as ours my lord.
King: Who is leading that army?
Advisor: General Beaufort
King: Ah I see.. he has manoeuvre 2 I see.
Advisor: 2? Based on what? What does that mean?
King: Oh just a scale of something.
Advisor: But what can we do my lord? This men can not fight without a leader.
King: Give the command to general Davis of the Third Army.
Advisor: But sir, he is hundreds of miles away, deep into Eastern Europe, on our campaign to conquer Moskva!
King: He will make it..
King: No leader you say? How big is the enemies army?
Advisor: About the same size as ours my lord.
King: Who is leading that army?
Advisor: General Beaufort
King: Ah I see.. he has manoeuvre 2 I see.
Advisor: 2? Based on what? What does that mean?
King: Oh just a scale of something.
Advisor: But what can we do my lord? This men can not fight without a leader.
King: Give the command to general Davis of the Third Army.
Advisor: But sir, he is hundreds of miles away, deep into Eastern Europe, on our campaign to conquer Moskva!
King: He will make it..
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I bet many players would die in agony if they removed that insta travel option for generals..
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Queen Elizabeth: Why is my damn castle falling apart?!?!
Sir Walter Raleigh: Your grace, I have sailed the world and seen many splendid sights. Castles and cities far more developed and advanced than our own.
Queen Elizabeth: Oh Walter I have heard enough of the glory that is Paris and it does not impress me...
Walter: Your Grace, the city I have in mind puts even Paris to shame.
Elizabeth: Well tell me where it is fool. Perhaps I can marry their King, have his children and bring our two wonderful countries together. Imagine me on such a splendid throne as the one you describe...
Walter: Well your grace, it truly is a shining city by the sea. I think they call it Wallachia. They are so well developed that they put our nation to shame.
Elizabeth: Even in the finest jewelry box... a turd is still a turd.
And thus ended the English branch of the Plantagenet line.
Sir Walter Raleigh: Your grace, I have sailed the world and seen many splendid sights. Castles and cities far more developed and advanced than our own.
Queen Elizabeth: Oh Walter I have heard enough of the glory that is Paris and it does not impress me...
Walter: Your Grace, the city I have in mind puts even Paris to shame.
Elizabeth: Well tell me where it is fool. Perhaps I can marry their King, have his children and bring our two wonderful countries together. Imagine me on such a splendid throne as the one you describe...
Walter: Well your grace, it truly is a shining city by the sea. I think they call it Wallachia. They are so well developed that they put our nation to shame.
Elizabeth: Even in the finest jewelry box... a turd is still a turd.
And thus ended the English branch of the Plantagenet line.
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General Not So Bright: We will never be ale to lift the siege of our capital...
Private: But sir, our numbers are far superior to the enemy forces surrounding our city.
General: But we will have to travel for months to get there.
Private: What are you talking about? The capital is right there. Its literally in walking distance...
General: PRIVATE! That is not the way back to the capital... This is the path we shall take. It is much more efficient (General draws a path through 6 territories to reach the one next door)
Private: Sir but the shortest distance between two points is a straight line. I just.... don't know....
General: That's right private... you don't know... anything apparently. And who was the idiot who told you that drivel about straight lines anyway?
Private: His name was Galileo I think.
General: You mean that fool who thinks the Earth revolves around the sun? That right there should tell you that anything that comes out of that guys mouth is just dumb. Look! I found a better route.... get the cogs ready, but we must be careful not to fall off the edge of the world!
Private: But sir, our numbers are far superior to the enemy forces surrounding our city.
General: But we will have to travel for months to get there.
Private: What are you talking about? The capital is right there. Its literally in walking distance...
General: PRIVATE! That is not the way back to the capital... This is the path we shall take. It is much more efficient (General draws a path through 6 territories to reach the one next door)
Private: Sir but the shortest distance between two points is a straight line. I just.... don't know....
General: That's right private... you don't know... anything apparently. And who was the idiot who told you that drivel about straight lines anyway?
Private: His name was Galileo I think.
General: You mean that fool who thinks the Earth revolves around the sun? That right there should tell you that anything that comes out of that guys mouth is just dumb. Look! I found a better route.... get the cogs ready, but we must be careful not to fall off the edge of the world!
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*10 november 1444*
-Chancellor: Sire, we are redy to declare a Holy War against the infidels! Let's cross the border!
-King: I don't fell well today... We can't wait for tomorrow and then crush the infidel!
*The next day*
-King: Let's go, Let's declare a holy war!
-Chancellor: But we can't, my lord.
-King: Why?
-Chancellor: We haven't taken religious ideas.
-Chancellor: Sire, we are redy to declare a Holy War against the infidels! Let's cross the border!
-King: I don't fell well today... We can't wait for tomorrow and then crush the infidel!
*The next day*
-King: Let's go, Let's declare a holy war!
-Chancellor: But we can't, my lord.
-King: Why?
-Chancellor: We haven't taken religious ideas.
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Religious zeal...
"Missionary, go show the people the truth path"
"I will, my lord!"
Day 3649...
"Sir, the people do not want our faith, they will revolt if we try to convert them"
Day 3650
"Sir, the people are suddenly willing to follow our faith"
"Missionary, go show the people the truth path"
"I will, my lord!"
Day 3649...
"Sir, the people do not want our faith, they will revolt if we try to convert them"
Day 3650
"Sir, the people are suddenly willing to follow our faith"
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I always imagine that they get the supplies from the provinces, they hunt, harvest, cut trees, ect. It makes sence for me.
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That works for smaller armies, but can you imagine trying to procure supplies for 30 000 soldiers?
From my current France game.
King of France: Messenger, what news do you bring?
Messenger:both sad and glorious news your Highness. The king of your Austrian allies is dead. However, the closest successor to his throne is you.
King: How? We're not even from the same dynasty?
Messenger: The entire Habsburg dynasty is gone, you, a Valois, are the closest heir.
King: What about those Hungarian Habsburgs? I see them right there, right on my royal marriages list.
Messenger: They thought the Austrian throne smelled bad.
King: Wut
Messenger: Also, the Burgundians have declared war.They prepare to march on us as we speak.
King: Who marches with them?
Messenger: None but those loyal to Charles of Burgundy himself.
King: But what about the English, our centuries old rival? Or the Aragonese, our rivals AND allies with the Burgundians? Or what about the half of the HRE that joined Burgundy and Aragon in that massive coalition war against us a few years back?
Messenger: The English were tired and the other still have a truce with us.
King: A truce? Why? All I did was pay them 30 ducats to stop occupying the 2/3rds of my kingdom they had taken, and I've heard that the entire payment went to Burgundy.
Messenger:That created a truce between them and us.
King:*Commits suicide*
I annexed all of Provence, took Avignon from the Papal States and took half of Brittany in two wars just after taking all of England's continental territories. Half the HRE, Aragon and Burgndy formed a coalition against me. My ally Castile DOWed Morocco (bringing in the Ottomans) and then Burgundy started the coalition war. My allies Castile, Portugal, Austria and Hungary joined me. I was invaded by the Ottoderps and the coalition. After years of intense fighting most of France (me) was occupied but I had won most of the battles (random 2 star general OP, I'm guessing Austria was making progress in the East too, but I was too focused on the Western front to notice) so my warscore was just around +30%. I managed to peace out for just giving up 30 ducats (worth 2% warscore). Castile signed peace with Morocco the next day. A few years later I got a PU over Austria (despite having a different dynasty than them and Hungary having the same dynasty), and Burgundy DOWed for the succession. My entire alliance chain accepted the CTAs, but their ally Aragon did not join (because the truce from the coalition was still standing). Halfway through the slaughter of Burgundy my king died. (I kept the PU over Austria though, high relations and prestige).
King of France: Messenger, what news do you bring?
Messenger:both sad and glorious news your Highness. The king of your Austrian allies is dead. However, the closest successor to his throne is you.
King: How? We're not even from the same dynasty?
Messenger: The entire Habsburg dynasty is gone, you, a Valois, are the closest heir.
King: What about those Hungarian Habsburgs? I see them right there, right on my royal marriages list.
Messenger: They thought the Austrian throne smelled bad.
King: Wut
Messenger: Also, the Burgundians have declared war.They prepare to march on us as we speak.
King: Who marches with them?
Messenger: None but those loyal to Charles of Burgundy himself.
King: But what about the English, our centuries old rival? Or the Aragonese, our rivals AND allies with the Burgundians? Or what about the half of the HRE that joined Burgundy and Aragon in that massive coalition war against us a few years back?
Messenger: The English were tired and the other still have a truce with us.
King: A truce? Why? All I did was pay them 30 ducats to stop occupying the 2/3rds of my kingdom they had taken, and I've heard that the entire payment went to Burgundy.
Messenger:That created a truce between them and us.
King:*Commits suicide*
I annexed all of Provence, took Avignon from the Papal States and took half of Brittany in two wars just after taking all of England's continental territories. Half the HRE, Aragon and Burgndy formed a coalition against me. My ally Castile DOWed Morocco (bringing in the Ottomans) and then Burgundy started the coalition war. My allies Castile, Portugal, Austria and Hungary joined me. I was invaded by the Ottoderps and the coalition. After years of intense fighting most of France (me) was occupied but I had won most of the battles (random 2 star general OP, I'm guessing Austria was making progress in the East too, but I was too focused on the Western front to notice) so my warscore was just around +30%. I managed to peace out for just giving up 30 ducats (worth 2% warscore). Castile signed peace with Morocco the next day. A few years later I got a PU over Austria (despite having a different dynasty than them and Hungary having the same dynasty), and Burgundy DOWed for the succession. My entire alliance chain accepted the CTAs, but their ally Aragon did not join (because the truce from the coalition was still standing). Halfway through the slaughter of Burgundy my king died. (I kept the PU over Austria though, high relations and prestige).
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"My king, I bring grave news!"
"What? Grave news on a happy day like this? I have just added the beautiful cities of Bremen, Lubeck and Hamburg to my realm!"
"About that, sire."
"Yes?"
"Sire, you waged war on the Hansa for the province of Ostfriesland. You had no claim to those cities."
"But I won them fair and square, didn't I? I defeated the Hansa completely and singlehandedly."
"Still, some of the Princes are concerned that your behavior in the last war has been a little... aggressive."
"Aggressive? I even let them keep Ostfriesland, and they dare call me aggressive?"
"To put it bluntly, sire, they are starting a coalition against you."
"They? Who is they? I'll show them I'm not afraid of a little coalition! They shall fear our might (and our allies)!"
"Saxe-Lauenburg."
"Is that all?"
"Wait... no. Verden. And Mecklenburg."
"That's doable."
"And Cologne. And Munster. And Pomerania. And Hesse. And Mainz. And Magdeburg. And Cleves. And Liege."
"..."
"And Bohemia. Brandenburg. Trier. The Palatinate. Holstein. Anhalt. Saxony. Wurzburg and Augsburg. Baden. Poland."
"WHAT?"
"They just hate us, sire."
"Don't remind me..."
"Salzburg."
"Well I am pretty salty now..."
"Ansbach."
"Et tu, Habsburgs?"
"Bohemia."
"You already said that. Now is there anyone else, or are you done?!"
"Aaaaand Ulm."
"Fantastic. You may go now."
"I have other news, your highness."
"Fire away..."
"The king of Poland has died without an heir. The order of succession dictates that Poland shall now be ruled directly by the king of France."
"...I... <sigh> ...but...but they...but...and I..."
"Sire?"
"Would you kindly go fetch me the scientist? I think I finally know in which direction I will lead this country."
"And which direction would that be, sire?"
"The northwest, I think. Into the unknown lands beyond Iceland."
"But sire, there are no lands beyond Iceland."
"No? Well, we'll let him double check that. I fear those icy waters out west might be the only chance at survival that we'll get..."
"What? Grave news on a happy day like this? I have just added the beautiful cities of Bremen, Lubeck and Hamburg to my realm!"
"About that, sire."
"Yes?"
"Sire, you waged war on the Hansa for the province of Ostfriesland. You had no claim to those cities."
"But I won them fair and square, didn't I? I defeated the Hansa completely and singlehandedly."
"Still, some of the Princes are concerned that your behavior in the last war has been a little... aggressive."
"Aggressive? I even let them keep Ostfriesland, and they dare call me aggressive?"
"To put it bluntly, sire, they are starting a coalition against you."
"They? Who is they? I'll show them I'm not afraid of a little coalition! They shall fear our might (and our allies)!"
"Saxe-Lauenburg."
"Is that all?"
"Wait... no. Verden. And Mecklenburg."
"That's doable."
"And Cologne. And Munster. And Pomerania. And Hesse. And Mainz. And Magdeburg. And Cleves. And Liege."
"..."
"And Bohemia. Brandenburg. Trier. The Palatinate. Holstein. Anhalt. Saxony. Wurzburg and Augsburg. Baden. Poland."
"WHAT?"
"They just hate us, sire."
"Don't remind me..."
"Salzburg."
"Well I am pretty salty now..."
"Ansbach."
"Et tu, Habsburgs?"
"Bohemia."
"You already said that. Now is there anyone else, or are you done?!"
"Aaaaand Ulm."
"Fantastic. You may go now."
"I have other news, your highness."
"Fire away..."
"The king of Poland has died without an heir. The order of succession dictates that Poland shall now be ruled directly by the king of France."
"...I... <sigh> ...but...but they...but...and I..."
"Sire?"
"Would you kindly go fetch me the scientist? I think I finally know in which direction I will lead this country."
"And which direction would that be, sire?"
"The northwest, I think. Into the unknown lands beyond Iceland."
"But sire, there are no lands beyond Iceland."
"No? Well, we'll let him double check that. I fear those icy waters out west might be the only chance at survival that we'll get..."
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Militaristic ruler of California: "I think we should ATTACK someone. Starting to get bored."
Advisor: "You might consider Japan, my lord."
Ruler: "Japan? Why?"
Advisor: "Your rivals, the puny nations of Oregon and Mexico, are invading them also."
Ruler: "But shouldn't we attack THEM then, while their armies are abroad?"
Advisor: "That is the idea my lord. Invade their home turf, and sail for Japan. They are an ideal arena for prestige fights against your rivals. They practically invented mortal kombat there."
(cause everyone and their mother uses expansion cb on Japan)
Advisor: "You might consider Japan, my lord."
Ruler: "Japan? Why?"
Advisor: "Your rivals, the puny nations of Oregon and Mexico, are invading them also."
Ruler: "But shouldn't we attack THEM then, while their armies are abroad?"
Advisor: "That is the idea my lord. Invade their home turf, and sail for Japan. They are an ideal arena for prestige fights against your rivals. They practically invented mortal kombat there."
(cause everyone and their mother uses expansion cb on Japan)
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