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AshWarrior

Corporal
70 Badges
Mar 4, 2014
26
1
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Here's a little secret, just between you and me...
ready?
*bum bum bum bum*
ok
it's coming
*bored timpanist*
wait for it
I LOVE MODS

It's an unhealthy love that spawned from Morrowind, where the base game was so broken that playing with the game couldn't even be considered modding. I learned of these new feelings with Oblivion, a game so ugly that any change would be considered a graphical improvement. Then... Skyrim happened.
Like a clown at a car dealership, infinite possibilities and spaces to expand were laid before me, and the next thing I knew, i was rolling up to the scene with over a hundred mods under the hood, and only minor inconveniences. I was used to Morrowind stability, and Skyrim did not disappoint.

Voice in my head - "But Ash, what about your other AAR, your first one, that's not even done yet, have you given up on that?

Actual Voice - Oh, silly, Voice, you've know as well as I do, that doing multiple things at the same time with dubious quality is my thang.

Mr. Voice - "Ash, isn't that the name for some 40 year old hipster who thinks Pokemon is still cool?"

Actual Voice - "Silly Voice, it's actually the name for some 4 year old who thought Pokemon was cool, and makes poor internet naming choices that will haunt him for the rest of his life, eventually succumbing to the weight of the enormity of his failure, he will resort to making overly-long, self-aware jokes about it on the internet that by virtue of their length are inherently what we like to call 'unfunny'.

Mr. Voice - "You're a loony"

All together - "I know you are, but what am I?"

Random pointless detour aside, what mod do you have the misfortune of hearing me write about? Well, John Locke will provide guidance, inspiration, and if we're lucky, a swell punchline.



Wow, Locke, i'm touched, for you to appear here, with a swell little quote on your neck there. How nice of you to come prepared, but you still never told us what mod we're using. Well, I guess our friend Conan knows what mod we're using. Play us out Conan!

Atta boy Conan

Yeah, uh, Locke, I know that you've got a nice resume and all, but, this just isn't your scene. I hate to be the one to do this to you, but... we're letting you go.

Now where were we? Right, right, talking about the game. I was trying my hardest to pick a nation to play as, and I can't move past Ethiopia, with sexy fort defense from sultry coptic ideas, stiff mountains, and with that totally rad uncolonized wasteland it borders, I would only have to worry about small fronts. Yeah, gimme that one.

Oh baby, those blues and with those heels! Ima cover you in spinach and call that a wrap!


Look at all the AI these days, gimme a historical bonus, gimme a lucky nations bonus, gimme free MONARCH POINTS!
BACK IN MY DAY, WE WERE ALL EQUALS, AND WERE THANKFUL FOR IT! NONA THIS AI BONUS NONSENSE!

until next time, when gameplay may actually happen, and the jokes may actually be funny.
 
Last edited:

Jack45

Captain
55 Badges
Feb 19, 2013
425
133
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Would be interested to see progress on this, Ottomans normally start ahead in this mod, but then collapse under their own weight and the world is conquered by Naples, Castille, Portugal or someone else with few fronts to fight on.

You should be able to do a WC with Ethiopia as long as you carefully pick which fronts to prioritise.