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I gotta say that this very one AAR plus the Tibetan AAR are the funniest AARs I've ever come to read here on paradox forums. Good Work! 
This AAR is hilarious, simply brilliant stuff! :rofl: Though I wonder will Borman ever recover from his bout of insanity?
*Embarresed* uhm, what happened to Borman again, in this AAR? how'd he become insane?
Anyways, the small typos and smartass lines, e.g. it's coffe, those horny bastards (answering to the "A bomb" of rush hour)
And those psychedelic colours, they just ebb cackling bursts of insanity.
I almost spat my pepsi on my screen when I was browsing this very AAR in the morning, as usual.
Well, I guess these things are usually funnyer when your a bit tired already but still...
Anyways, the small typos and smartass lines, e.g. it's coffe, those horny bastards (answering to the "A bomb" of rush hour)
And those psychedelic colours, they just ebb cackling bursts of insanity.
I almost spat my pepsi on my screen when I was browsing this very AAR in the morning, as usual.
Well, I guess these things are usually funnyer when your a bit tired already but still...
Let me guess. The general leading that invasion is Patton It would be soo like him to lead one mechanised? division against entire germany.
It would be soo like him to lead one mechanised? division against entire germany.
Hehehe... It seems the AI strategy of invading Dieppe is working! :rofl: Why do people say that the AI is dumb? The AI is a Genius!
Japan is in big trouble, I had the same in my game but it was the USA invaded with 3 divisions & managed to grab all of Japan except Kyushu with only the 3 divsions. I normally try to avoid military control of majors but in this instance I think it might be a good idea.
Won't be long till that mech division captures Berlin!!!
Excellent AAR
edit As its the UK that has invaded Japan they probably done it with 3 French militia divisions :wacko:
Won't be long till that mech division captures Berlin!!!
Excellent AAR
edit As its the UK that has invaded Japan they probably done it with 3 French militia divisions :wacko:
Lol, one word to describe the American insane landing in France, and it´s Shit? I would preffere a word like "dinner","idiots" or just simply... Again???
Laurwin: That must be the greatest compliment I´ve received so far, thanks
VILenin: Only if bringing him back opens up new jokes, otherwise he´ll stay gone
Leumatiello: You MUST be joking!! On the other hand, try comparing what the americans hold now and what they took during D-Day. Its almost the same
Kurt_Steiner: The closest germans are in Britain and Nice So yes...
insolent1: Taking MC of japan would be a good idea. Which is why I wont do it. This is a insane AAR, remember
Laurwin: Well I think I wrote he suffered a complete mental breakdown, coma IIRC after the unveiling of Hitlers Plan. You-know "take vladivostok"
I can´t read if you mean "Your AAR is insane, well done" or "Your AAR is too insane, Im beginning to get (more) insane". But I´ll go with number 1!
4th Dimension: Close.... It is a guy named Krueger. Check out this link.
Joppeius: How about I use those three words, when they invade again?
therev: Actually, I must admit Im more afraid of the british than the americans or the russians :wacko: Think this AAR must have affected my mind
likk9922:
jjman007: Welcome, and thanks
VILenin: Only if bringing him back opens up new jokes, otherwise he´ll stay gone
Leumatiello: You MUST be joking!! On the other hand, try comparing what the americans hold now and what they took during D-Day. Its almost the same
Kurt_Steiner: The closest germans are in Britain and Nice
So yes...insolent1: Taking MC of japan would be a good idea. Which is why I wont do it. This is a insane AAR, remember
Laurwin: Well I think I wrote he suffered a complete mental breakdown, coma IIRC after the unveiling of Hitlers Plan. You-know "take vladivostok"
I can´t read if you mean "Your AAR is insane, well done" or "Your AAR is too insane, Im beginning to get (more) insane". But I´ll go with number 1!
4th Dimension: Close.... It is a guy named Krueger. Check out this link.
Always fun learning something new about your enemy.by that link said:
Joppeius: How about I use those three words, when they invade again?
therev: Actually, I must admit Im more afraid of the british than the americans or the russians :wacko: Think this AAR must have affected my mind
likk9922:
jjman007: Welcome, and thanks
Okay, so heres a little gameplay update (as in tomorrow is still update day). Tomorrow is however also the great day of loading, and I plan to play severel months of game time. Possibly up to the summer campaigns. So I thought it might be fun to try and post what tactic I plan to use on the Russians, and then look back later and see how it turned out. And it really is the most advanced plan I´ve ever created. So hope you like it.
The plan is to pretend I´ve placed most units in the north, when in fact the majority of my army is to the south. I will try to disguise this tactic by placing the army a small way behind the front line and guarding the skies with intercepters to prevent their discovery.
These are the borders I hope to have by the time spring dries. It is basicly the borders now, except I MUST take Lvov for the succes of the offensive. This is due to two factors, a) it allows me to get a level 10 airfield close to the action. Quite importment. b) It allows my troops to hide in a bit better position.
I also accept the possibily that I might lose a province to the south, it will be no big loss.
My effective number will likely be roughly 200 divisions, ATM i have 220. But many axis minor divisions will move to the west to protect beaches and stuff like that, I´ll likely be receiving german troops in return. But it will be unlikely to be as many divisions as I lose. Secondly, the axis minor troops that stay are understrenght and far weaker than their german counterparts. The good news is however that the majority of these ~200 german will be infantery 45
Now Himmler expects the russians will have roughly 700 divisions by the start of the campaign. I think this might be a bit too much. Perhaps 600 divsions. Now according to Mannerheim roughly 50 are tied down in and around Finland, a additional 50 divisions are likely scattered throughout USSR. Guarding against the japanese, guarding against a invasion through Turkey or serving as a reserve. That means i´ll likely be facing 500 russian divisions on the eastern front. So i´ll be outnumbered 5:2 both in men and in tanks.
The plan is to place 65 divisions guarding the north front, leaving 135 divisions to make a offensive in the south. The North would hopefully be able to deal with the anticipated 3 million russians, anything more and the defenses might fall. Anything less, and too many russians would be in the south leaving the offensive in Jepardy.
Now luckily I have a secret weapon. 7000 rockets avaible by the start of the offensive, I´m considering increasing this number. These will be used to bomb the russian northern sector. Hopefully every single bridge and road will be disintegrated. If this happens, then the north will gain a vital logistical advance. And if the russians choose not to attack the north, but instead reinforce the south. Then this will slow them down greatly. The following areas are designated for complete destruction, hopefully I have enough rockets...
Now the rockets will be launched as soon as as one of the these conditions are met.
a ) The russians are beginning a major offensive in the norht.
b ) The mud has mostly melted in the south.
c ) I´m really bored...
As soon as the rockets begin hitting their targets then my four arme groups that have been in hiding move forward. And as soon as they are ready, then the offensive will begin. It will roughly follow this plan.
Yellow is pockets, black german advances and green support attacks. The first pocket contains ATM 22 russian divisions, and I think I have a good chance of encircling most of those. The pockets later on are far more sketchy, I have not taken into account the time to travel from a province to the next, nor taken into account that some arme groups may compose of quick units. ( okay Im joking, I dont have enough quick units to make a arme group). Ohh yeah, and Arme group E vanishes after offensive part 2 uhm... not because I forgot them.... But uhm.... to confuse the enemy
I´ve not decided finally on how many divisions each group should get. But I think it will be roughly like this.
D, E & G will have 20 divisions each. Probobly some heavy artillety pieces, esapcially in D.
F & H will have 15 divisions each, possibly later reduced to 10. Will likely see little action, they´ll get artillery if I dont know what to do with it.
J, K, L & M are the spearheads. These will be commanded by the best offensive generals and have first pick on big self-propelled guns. Combined they´ll have 50 division. The remaining armour and Mechs ( 8 units) will be divided between these groups.
I hope this works, but I´m not too certain.
Plan Edit 1: J, K, L & M will spend a lot of time in the north to convince the enemy that I have the most troops here. A few months before snow dries they´ll move due west ( to avoid being seen ), and then south and into their positions.
Plan Edit 2: I also plan to place 5 paratrooper divisions in Lvov. These will conduct opportunistic landings, to cut of enemy troops or to assist in breaking heavy resistance.
The plan is to pretend I´ve placed most units in the north, when in fact the majority of my army is to the south. I will try to disguise this tactic by placing the army a small way behind the front line and guarding the skies with intercepters to prevent their discovery.
These are the borders I hope to have by the time spring dries. It is basicly the borders now, except I MUST take Lvov for the succes of the offensive. This is due to two factors, a) it allows me to get a level 10 airfield close to the action. Quite importment. b) It allows my troops to hide in a bit better position.
I also accept the possibily that I might lose a province to the south, it will be no big loss.
My effective number will likely be roughly 200 divisions, ATM i have 220. But many axis minor divisions will move to the west to protect beaches and stuff like that, I´ll likely be receiving german troops in return. But it will be unlikely to be as many divisions as I lose. Secondly, the axis minor troops that stay are understrenght and far weaker than their german counterparts. The good news is however that the majority of these ~200 german will be infantery 45
Now Himmler expects the russians will have roughly 700 divisions by the start of the campaign. I think this might be a bit too much. Perhaps 600 divsions. Now according to Mannerheim roughly 50 are tied down in and around Finland, a additional 50 divisions are likely scattered throughout USSR. Guarding against the japanese, guarding against a invasion through Turkey or serving as a reserve. That means i´ll likely be facing 500 russian divisions on the eastern front. So i´ll be outnumbered 5:2 both in men and in tanks.
The plan is to place 65 divisions guarding the north front, leaving 135 divisions to make a offensive in the south. The North would hopefully be able to deal with the anticipated 3 million russians, anything more and the defenses might fall. Anything less, and too many russians would be in the south leaving the offensive in Jepardy.
Now luckily I have a secret weapon. 7000 rockets avaible by the start of the offensive, I´m considering increasing this number. These will be used to bomb the russian northern sector. Hopefully every single bridge and road will be disintegrated. If this happens, then the north will gain a vital logistical advance. And if the russians choose not to attack the north, but instead reinforce the south. Then this will slow them down greatly. The following areas are designated for complete destruction, hopefully I have enough rockets...
Now the rockets will be launched as soon as as one of the these conditions are met.
a ) The russians are beginning a major offensive in the norht.
b ) The mud has mostly melted in the south.
c ) I´m really bored...
As soon as the rockets begin hitting their targets then my four arme groups that have been in hiding move forward. And as soon as they are ready, then the offensive will begin. It will roughly follow this plan.
Yellow is pockets, black german advances and green support attacks. The first pocket contains ATM 22 russian divisions, and I think I have a good chance of encircling most of those. The pockets later on are far more sketchy, I have not taken into account the time to travel from a province to the next, nor taken into account that some arme groups may compose of quick units. ( okay Im joking, I dont have enough quick units to make a arme group). Ohh yeah, and Arme group E vanishes after offensive part 2 uhm... not because I forgot them.... But uhm.... to confuse the enemy
I´ve not decided finally on how many divisions each group should get. But I think it will be roughly like this.
D, E & G will have 20 divisions each. Probobly some heavy artillety pieces, esapcially in D.
F & H will have 15 divisions each, possibly later reduced to 10. Will likely see little action, they´ll get artillery if I dont know what to do with it.
J, K, L & M are the spearheads. These will be commanded by the best offensive generals and have first pick on big self-propelled guns. Combined they´ll have 50 division. The remaining armour and Mechs ( 8 units) will be divided between these groups.
I hope this works, but I´m not too certain.
Plan Edit 1: J, K, L & M will spend a lot of time in the north to convince the enemy that I have the most troops here. A few months before snow dries they´ll move due west ( to avoid being seen ), and then south and into their positions.
Plan Edit 2: I also plan to place 5 paratrooper divisions in Lvov. These will conduct opportunistic landings, to cut of enemy troops or to assist in breaking heavy resistance.
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Good luck!
But how many units will be left to attack the Kamtjatka from the east? lol
But how many units will be left to attack the Kamtjatka from the east? lol
Guderain? :rofl:
I really like the idea of disintigrating bridges. And the battleplan looks good, if a bit optomistic about the south.
I really like the idea of disintigrating bridges. And the battleplan looks good, if a bit optomistic about the south.
Good plan! South-western USSR is an ideal playground for tanks. The north will be more demanding though. Got to use some Luftwaffe there.
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Your plan sounds shockingly reasonable! Will perhaps each of those rockets have a German paratrooper riding it to do the sabotage work?
Will perhaps each of those rockets have a German paratrooper riding it to do the sabotage work?
aAAh, now I remember. The abominable plan to flank the Russians from Vladivostok, through US.
Perhaps Bormann thought that there were more pressing matters to be adressed, like the Russkies.
And the yanks DO have some divisions there as well, at this point of the game.
Although your own navy isn't that bad either, so why isn't Britain your top priority anymore?
Perhaps Bormann thought that there were more pressing matters to be adressed, like the Russkies.
And the yanks DO have some divisions there as well, at this point of the game.
Although your own navy isn't that bad either, so why isn't Britain your top priority anymore?
Britain? What Britain? Where?
Buckingham Palace is now just another Eva's shoe closet.
Buckingham Palace is now just another Eva's shoe closet.