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firezatswill9

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Aug 26, 2014
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*Abruptly wakes up* OH GOD, WHAT YEAR IS IT?! 2019, nearly 2020? Oh damn, I overslept. What's the state of the game?

...

I see, so the devs went the brave route of making the game worse by breaking several mechanics. Well, I got the itch to play, and I've NEVER* done a Belgium run before. But I want to make this run special. So I've gone ahead and made some SPECIAL arrangements for Belgium this time!

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As you can see, it appears that the entirety of Belgium, has transported back from WW1 to 1444! How bizarre! I wonder what could happen with such a kooky occurrence!

Setup aside, let me break this AAR down for you.

Country: Belgium
Status: Confused
Technology: Super Western
Ideas: Big Brained
Religion: Less important, but pretty Orthodox
Status of the New World: Unknown

Goal: Making the largest coalition possible. Intentional coalition creation will start upon reaching the age of absolutism. If we make a coalition containing the entire world, we win the gold medal. If we WC before then, then it's a silver medal.

Rules: Upon completing our national ideas, we MUST take max WS in any war we're in (unless it's an ally's war we got pulled into. Can't control the AI). Any coalitions we fight MUST be won, and we MUST take as much land as possible. And continue to do so until either 1821 or we die. Whichever comes first.

Difficulty: Hard. This is meant to be a relatively simple and relaxing campaign. No need for Very Hard AI.

So strap in folks, time for a wild ride!

*Please don't look up any other potential Belgium AARs that I may have abandoned, I lost interest in the game once Rule Britannia came out and gutted the mission system for something much worse IMO.
 
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I knew looking at the title that it would be something of you :D! No-one in their right mind would do something with Belgium, and you have the precedences even if you tend to ignore them ;). I'll definitely follow this, third time's the charm after all.
 
I knew looking at the title that it would be something of you :D! No-one in their right mind would do something with Belgium, and you have the precedences even if you tend to ignore them ;). I'll definitely follow this, third time's the charm after all.
Glad to see you again, Tom! I hope I entertain with this kinda dumb idea I had!

And what other Belgian runs? This is the first and only one I've done ;)

But seriously, I hate that I left 2 runs barely started, but I just could NOT bring myself to play :(. This time should be better, though!
 
Chapter 1: From Confusing Beginnings
Chapter 1: From Confusing Beginnings

Hello ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Belgium! But if you were to ask the neighbors, there's no such thing as a Belgium. Only some bizzaro land that has appeared in the Burgundian Benelux!

But that's not our primary concern. Our primary concern is with the fact that Belgium has been thrust through time itself to deny the world the right of using it for a battlefield in World War 1! Or something. I don't know, once time travel's introduced, all logic goes out the window. :confused:

First order of business, preventing the Central Powers from prematurely forming and invading us!

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By marrying the walking chins, we're definitely going to provide safe haven for our people! ;)

But no alliance yet, we gotta bump our relations more. But we got a slot reserved for us with this wedding.

Hopefully none of our family members are related to the Habsburgs, we might have just become our own ancestor if they are. :eek:

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And with the wedding comes people staring in awe at our futuristic ways of managing a country. You see, we pay people to enter the army, instead of drafting farmers with pitchforks.

Also we have some pretty impressively build homes. And saxophones! :cool:

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In fact, our saxophones are so beloved internationally, that the globe is in awe of our innovative thinking! Which lets us get our diplomacy and military reforms slowly working towards the newly immigrated peasants we now rule over. It's a slow process, we don't want to overload them with future knowledge. :rolleyes:

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Alas, there are some traditions we cannot break the rabble from enjoying. Jousting being one of them. Oh well, as long as they listen to us, let them keep their silly custom for the time being.

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Despite our wishes for peace, we know that the Netherlands are nothing but trouble, and will not help us in our dire hour. So we will FORCE them to help us, by bringing them into the fold!

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Wow, it's a wonder what 400 years of training will do. Our morale is through the roof, knowing that our end goal is beyond just!

But really, 4.1 morale? Hmmm, I wonder if that has to do with our custom idea set... o_O

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Just a casual stackwipe, nothing to see here. ;)

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Brittany decided they wanted to try their hand at breaking through to our modern soldiers. Alas, they were no match for superior Belgian technology!

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Not long after, we vassalize East Frisia. Because we could. I mean, NOT being in the HRE in 1444? They were ASKING to be force vassalized! I did them a FAVOR!

Forgot to enforce religion on them, though :oops:

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Brittany is too big to be vassalized, so we just steal their money and trade money. We'll get you next time, Brits! :mad:

And we mean both you AND the future GB!

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Time for peace! We eat Utrecht, and take their treasury. More power in the Channel is ours! *Ahem* I mean, we're ONLY looking out for our future safety, this was a necessary evil. Yes, quite. ;)

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But all that war got Leopold in the mood, and just a few months later, we had a baby! And even more surprising, it SURVIVED despite local "doctors" trying to help!

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Now, I noticed Chinstria would ally us, but the bar says otherwise. Oh well, worst case, they use our land as a battlefield.

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....

Um, sure AI. That makes sense. Total sense. Great. I'm not complaining. :confused:

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Well, anyhow, we're plowing along with tech, and I figured I'd give a look at our army stats. As you can see, we're pretty stacked in the morale front!

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And finally, in 1454, we heard that the Renaissance has started. Better bring out all those Renaissance paintings we have hidden away in the palace, make sure the world sees us as the REAL originators of the Renaissance!

I think we might be causing some sort of ripple effect with our meddling in time. Eh, I'm sure it'll be fine! :D

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Next, to (attempt to) align ourselves with the frogs. They're big, and more importantly, next to us. Two very imposing things, if I must say so.

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It turns out that the Dutch-Belgian rivalry has transcended time itself, and as such we're looking to steal our neighbor's radio so their place looks worse than ours in comparison!

But in this case, the radio is Zeeland. ;)

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Tech 5 admin means it's IDEA TIME! Oh boy, I can't wait to get that Maritime-Naval Policy! Said no one ever.

We're getting innovative. So we can get to work on our electric saxophones.

But then, local news broke, in the form of some guy running down the street, shouting on the top of his lungs. And it may be trouble for us...

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The Baguette has the Castilian crown, in addition to the French one! :eek:

Well, if we're lucky (and PDX's bugs don't screw us), we may be able to get both crowns for ourselves! Or we could just kill them. Either way works for us. ;)

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Anyways, it's reform time. And we decide that we need more soldiers! ALWAYS MORE SOLDIERS!

Downside is, because of the how PDX designed the HRE to NOT consider custom nations, doing this demoted us to duchy rank, despite spending 10 Belgian dollary-doos on being a kingdom. :mad:

Also, we're Prussian government. Because when the world sends you back in time, you decide that Prussia had some good ideas, militarily at least!

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Now, it's time for us to continue our crusade against the Dutch! This time, we're coming for Gelre!

Hide yo kids, hide you wife, the Belgians are coming, bringing nothin' but strife!

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Well, strife and some authority to the churches. Gotta avoid the protestant reformation somehow!


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We peaced out both Munster and Alsace for their money, as well as changing their religion to the eastern orthodoxy. May as well see how long I can delay the reformation while I'm at it!

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Next, we've finally re-introduced the Renaissance to our people. And everyone was all "Oh yeah, I remember hearing about that. Is THAT what's going on now? Oh shit, we're never going back to the 20th century..."

AND THERE WAS MUCH REJOICING!

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And then, on July 10th, 1464, our engineers had finally gotten our factories to work on steam power and not coal, allowing us to resume production of our most stalwart weapon of the Great War, the Mauser M1889!

Allow me to transcribe the idea text here:

Mauser M1889
Due to our superior Belgian technology, we have managed to bring back our ultimate infantry weapon from the Great War, the Mauser Model 1889. With this, we will make sure that our future enemies shall never rise to prominence.

+20% Infantry Combat Ability

So yes, our ideas are a TAD OP. But we're from the future, we got better smarts and stuff! Also a really dumb goal to achieve.

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I'll leave this first chapter off with the peacedeal. We only took Gelre, because we could force their religion as well, which saves us a couple hundred ducats and some unrest. Remember, it's only after we finish our national ideas that we need to get the coalition building going.

I hope you enjoyed this first chapter!
 

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Belgium is confused, so am I.
 
At least there's also no such thing as the Netherlands here, and there never will be thanks to your actions :p.

Nope, we don't need some dutchman coming in here and just watching as our land and people get ravaged by the first test of modern warfare!

Belgium is confused, so am I.

Hey Atwix, good to see you again after so long! And what's all that confusing about Belgium as a nation being sent back in time by some scientists to prevent WW1 from ever happening? It's all completely sound logic :p
 
Chapter 2: Time is a Wibbly-Wobbly Thing
Chapter 2: Time is a Wibbly-Wobbly Thing

Welgekomen! It's time for more of the Adventures of Belgium and It's Time Traveling Government and Military!

...

That's a long title, I'll workshop it a bit, make it less lengthy and gross.

Anyways! It's time to see what kind of crazy shenanigans Albert, Leopold, and those goofy generals get themselves into!

...But it looks like we're not the ONLY time travelers!

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King Arthur has come forward to the 1400s for some reason! But, he did something much more vile, something that would seal the fate of England. He, and his cohorts, decided to "Not go to Belgium, it's a rather silly place" :mad:

Albert will not STAND for such indignity from some Dark Age myth! But, the people still like England for their help in the Great War. And there are a few people debating the "ethics" of "completely altering the course of history by targeting a nation that will form the largest empire in history", or as they're better known as, COWARDS!

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Whilst we root out the cowards in our society, we turn to a front that we can ALL agree upon. Destroying Germany! :)

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After a quick wipe of the Clevian Army, we're left with a paultry 7k Mainzians to deal with! But... where are they?

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They're... blackflagged in Saxony? And not attempting to move. OK. Sure. No problem. That's fine. Not like we're burning your nation in a siege.

AI gonna AI. :rolleyes:

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...

AI gonna AI :rolleyes:

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Not gonna complain about AI idiocy in my favor. Man, I wish that the AI was actually competent. I remember a time when it was. But that was a long, long time ago...

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Mainz becomes Orthodox, and gives us their lunch money, and their trade power. The more we convert, the more we cripple the Germans! Plus, we can eat them later for less AE. Because for now, AE is NOT just a number.

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Cleves is cleft from existence.

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Looking to the east, we see that the Poles are doing well in their war against the Hungarians. And we feel some kinship with the Poles, being used as the battlefield between the Russians and the Central Powers. So we decide to ally them! And definitely not just because they're big and strong atm!

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The unfortunate thing about being in the in the 1400s is that people are more gung-ho about their religion of choice. To the point that it sometimes falls on the state to do church stuff. But we get some good benefits, so we put up with it.

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ANOTHER unfortunate thing about living through the Renaissance is that, as time travelers, we already HAVE a LOT of Renaissance era art. And we don't want dupes of existing art, it lowers the prestige by acknowledging they're not one of a kind. :(

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Looks like the Burgundians have started to come around, and at least admitted that we're a nation. And you know what, that''s fine. We want Burgundy to live past the magical date of December 31st, 1499. Hence why we aren't attacking them yet.

YET ;)

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It's time for our first splendor ability doodad! We're getting the AE reduction, we'll need it while we eat the HRE. Like I said, coalitions aren't kosher juuuuuust yet.

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It looks like it's taken a while, but the world has finally acknowledged that BELGIUM was the first nation in the world to make cannons. Granted, they're FUTURE cannons, but they're still the first cannons in the world!

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OH HO HO! BAGUETTE! FOIS GRAS! ESCARGOT! Frogs. We got France as an ally, and Castile by extension. Looks like All's Quiet on the Western Front :D

But then, tragedy struck.

Prince Leopold the 3rd was killed in a freak hunting accident. He tried to wrestle a bear, but then realized he wasn't Russian.

BUT just then, a younger Leopold the 3rd appeared from another time portal, picked up the crown off the dead Leopold's head, and went about his usual business.

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I think we might only have 3 names available in Belgium. All our kings will be named either Albert or Leopold III, and our queens will be named Elisabeth. Custom nations, SO GREAT! :rolleyes:

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Time to finish off this minor dutch nation, no sweat.

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No sweat whatsoever.

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But, in the downtime, we managed to convince the people that King Arthur had unleashed the bear the had murderified Prince Leopold the 3rd the 1st! And with the backing of an incensed people, we declare war upon the rotten English! And as they're wrapped up defending the Portuguese from the Moroccans, we'll have free reign in their continental holdings!

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Provence dies pathetically. We know the drill with these small nations.

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A few years into the war, and we've seen neither hide nor tail of the English. Must be scared of how INNOVATIVE our miniature boomsticks are!

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Spoke too soon, it looks like the English have bailed out of their Moroccan war, and King Arthur is leading his men into a hail of bullets!

Unfortunately, we need to conserve ammo, so we end up in a bayonet charge!

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FIX BAYONETS AND AIM FOR THE EYES!

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Reinforcements are on the way, we need to win before they arrive and outflank us!

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In the nick of time, victory was reached. Oof on those casualties, but we'll survive.

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TIME FOR ROUND 2, YOU PROTO-BRITS!

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UNLEASH THE CANNON BARRAGE!

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More warscore, and at a little over half the losses that England felt. Unacceptable. We must CRUSH them!

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Recovered and ready for more, but this time we got a plan!

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Reinforcements mean nothing to us, we have superior tech, skill, and musicians!

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LOOK AT THEM RUN, THE PANSIES!

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More 2:1 casualties in our favor. One day, we'll make it be 5:1. One day...

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That day may come soon, as we're getting our next idea group. And of course we're going for Quality ideas! Infantry combat ability, cannon combat ability, discipline, and a policy for even MORE infantry combat ability is the stuff space marines are MADE of!

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Unfortunately, we couldn't force convert Provence, as they were too big. So we just took a bit of change to get them out of the war.

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... Not sure WHY the AI abandoned this siege, while I was moving into Alencon. They would have had a severe numerical advantage, but hey, who am I to turn up free WS?

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And all during this war, we've been building up our idea set, and we've unlocked our SECOND national idea! Allow me to write out what it is, for those who are on mobile and can't read the screenshot so well.

What's a Belgium?

The nations of this time period are unaware of any state called "Belgium." As such, we are free to make our presence known by claiming land, and claiming that it is our birthright. And if they disagree, then we shall send in the army.

Core-Creation Cost: -20%
So basically, we can core things faster and cheaper. Which is nice in areas with dense amounts of rich provinces.

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Now it's time for the final bit of our trap. FIRST, we kill the English!

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NEXT: we pursue the fleeing Englishmen!

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We follow the English to Labourd, and then we stackwipe them! Destroying their entire army in a matter of moments!

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And with that, we peace out England for their continental CoTs in the English Channel node. With only minimal potential for coalition. Hurrah!

And I think that's where we'll call it for now. We're getting more power, both in and out of the HRE. And despite taking French cores, France still wants to be our ally! For now. They'll probably dump us in the middle of a war and not get a stabhit. I'M NOT STILL BITTER ABOUT THE OTTOMANS DURING ZOROAFRICA! YOU'RE STILL BITTER ABOUT THE OTTOMANS DURING ZOROAFRICA! :mad:

Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this entry!
 
Be sure to loot all the Northern Low Countries to squeeze all the money out of them as possible ;). Nice progress, I fondly remember a CN run as Belgium sticking to my territory but committing myself fully to developing, the HRE and colonisation. It was a fun run to do.
 
Why not take pale and invade england from their home turf? I would ally scotland and bash them!!!

But that is me...
 
Will try to follow and keep up
 
Be sure to loot all the Northern Low Countries to squeeze all the money out of them as possible ;). Nice progress, I fondly remember a CN run as Belgium sticking to my territory but committing myself fully to developing, the HRE and colonisation. It was a fun run to do.
Oh, I plan on taking more than just the Northern Low Countries ;). I tried playing tall, making CNs and intervening in wars, but I couldn't really keep myself interested. I'm an expansionist through and through I guess.

Why not take pale and invade england from their home turf? I would ally scotland and bash them!!!

But that is me...

My immediate focus is on the mainland, since that's where the land that France could take is. Once the mainland English Channel node is locked down, that's when our Operation Sealion starts proper.

Will try to follow and keep up

Hiya Stnylan, glad to see you! And no worries if you can't keep up with it, I know you have a lot of AARs that you're reading!
 
QUICK UPDATE: I've played for another 20 years or so, and I've decided to change one of my rules. The coalition creation will begin once we hit the age of absolutism. This isn't all that much different from my original idea, where I'd just pick and choose what ideas I'd get until I had a nice powerbase, meaning that I'd fill my national ideas out around about 1600 or so. Basically, this is just me being more transparent instead of sneaky cheeky about it. Plus, as I rarely play in Europe, I had NO idea how easy it would be to fill out idea groups. Like, really, I could have all my national ideas by 1530 or 40 if I wanted. Having god rulers also helps, but still.

That's all for now, I should be making an update tomorrow or Thursday, depends on how long my meeting runs.
 
As long as you continue, I'm good with it
 
Chapter 3: Channeling Our Inner Trader
Chapter 3: Channeling Our Inner Trader

Hello everyone, and welcome back the the Tale of the Time Traveling Belgians! Where the country is enlightened, but the neighbors are not!

We start off today with France wanting to know what our maps show.

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We only show them a little more than what they know. I mean, we can't just REVEAL the whole world to them with our FUTURE maps, that could destroy the space time continuum! Or something ;)

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And then, several decades after the Blurple menace had died, their refugees have come pounding on our door, asking if they can crash on the couch while they get their life back on track. And they'll pay some rent so they're not just freeloading. And who are we to say no to such an offer? :cool:

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And then Austria comes asking for a cup of maps. And we say "sure" since we're not giving them anything more than a poorly drawn picture on a cocktail napkin. It wasn't even of the earth, but the Austrians were happy either way. Stupid Habsburgs... :rolleyes:

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Next, we get our 2nd age ability! We want the bordering claims one! While transfering subjects is nice, there's a limit to the size of the subject you can get. IIRC, the biggest you can get is Norway. And who wants Norway? Gross...

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Our modern sciences are slowly seeping to the lower dregs of society. But they don't seem to realize that we already know things like "if you tie a man to a table and cut open his stomach, you can see inside it but he'll die pretty fast", but hey, at least THEY'RE learning! o_O

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Unfortunately, on March 1st, 1486, we lost Albert. Which is gonna be hell to inscribe on his tombstone! April 8th, 1875 - March 1st, 1486? THAT oughta confuse some scholars! :eek:

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Meanwhile, France is OK with us, but man are they going HAM in Iberia. We're gonna see a massive France this game. Here's hoping we can play the game of thrones once they annex Castile, given how PDX broke how PUing a nation with PUs works. :oops:

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And, as usual, Burgundy declares a war that it really SHOULD win, but of course will lose spectacularly. :confused:

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And now, for some raisin, Austria decides that they don't want us to be friends with them AND France, so we have to choose. And that's easy, since ONE OF YOU DIDN'T BOMB AND PILLAGE OUR LAND IN THE MID 1910s! :mad:

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Double unfortunate is that Leopold the 3rd the 2nd is now the only person in the royal family. I'm hoping that he'll croak and get me a de Valois on the throne.

(It's a frog pun, because France)

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But hey, we at least got our RM with Austria back, keeping us about 100 relations and in reach of an alliance, if they didn't hate France. the 100 relations is good because that means that they won't send us unlawful territory letters. Which we promptly reply with "we didn't get them, sorry!"

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We get free claims on Burgundy. Because those proto-Frenchmen are just SO bad at their jobs!

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Next, it's time to bash England again! But, what's that?! AUSTRIA?! ON THE ENEMY'S SIDE!?

That's it, England has OFFICIALLY betrayed us! Because alliances are a completely static thing that have NEVER once changed with the times! They MUST die! :mad:

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We first sieged up the land we wanted that bordered France, and THEN called them in. That way we can get everything we want! :)

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Large stack of Austrians and English in our vassal's land! But our brave Belgians with their bolt action rifles are here to stop them, with the French and their pointy sticks covering our flank!

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Hah! Easy peasy! And the French are just about to arrive!

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Unfortunately, we didn't kill enough of them to cause a wipe. But we WILL still kill a lot of them! ;)

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Oof, that hurts. I mean, we'll recover, but ouch, that's a lot of men lost.

I'm also trying to avoid mercs this run, since it looks like that's a mechanic that's getting gutted and essentially removed in the next patch. Unless PDX changes their direction with that between me writing this and the present.

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More Austrians? IN OUR LAND?! GET OUTTA HERE!

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About 2:1 casualties. Still too high on our side...

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Huh. Looks like England doesn't like that 15k stack. Well, we'll take care of it for them, Old Yeller style!

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Nearly a flawless victory :cool:

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We peace out Austria, and get war reps, some cash, break their alliance with England, and make them unrival France.

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The downside from being an orthodox nation in Catholicsville is that we ALWAYS get this event. Unrest galore. But Orthodox gives SO MUCH - unrest, we're fine with it.

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And... we get an heir. A pretty shit heir, too. I'll disinherit him after we peace out, not like I'd forget to kill the dumb baby. :eek:

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Next age ability, free war taxes. Because cash money is cash money.

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Speaking of cash money, we're taking the last provinces that England had on the mainland (that were in the English Channel node), as well as Mann. Why? Because that gives us more places to make claims on!

And I tried to take something on the British mainland, but I was always denied due to "active forts" baloney. Hence why I only got Mann.

But hey, France is cool with this peacedeal, even though we now own a LOT of their cores. So that's pretty sweet. :D

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And while we're on the topic, let's get more of those mainland CoTs, especially since Burgundy lost their war (big surprise :rolleyes:) and now their PUs are free. Free and unallied to anyone.

Their first and LAST mistake.

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...Shit, did I kill the kid? No, I said I was going to do that next week. Well fuck, now we're stuck with an idiot on the throne until we get a better heir that's 15 or older. Here's hoping he dies prematurely and we can get that Valois on the throne. That'd be sweet, and it wouldn't mess with bloodlines and timelines! I think... Time travel is complex, OK?!

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But hey, we're keeping in bed with the Habsburgs and their massive chins, so we're safe from them FOR NOW!

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I failed to mention it earlier, but the protestant reformation has begun! We've got a bit of a pickle, now, since we gotta prevent Europe from becoming ALL protestant or reformed. We want a mix of the 3 branches of Catholicism, not just one or two dominating like they do this patch, due to busted AI conversions.

Seriously, why can't that get a priority patch to get fixed? Sorry for constantly complaining this time, but there are a LOT of boneheaded things that are coming up and I can't NOT call them out!

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Next, since we won our previous war with little effort, we go after Lubeck, to get more trade nodes that lead into the Channel!

Plus, we can force convert some OPMs and weaken the reformation that way! :p

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Even caught unaware with half our army split off, we're winning!

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That'll teach them for coming into OUR land! HOME TURF, BABY!

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Bremen peaced out for war reps, money, and making them follow Orthodox Christianity. All in all, good stuff.

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Finally, 6 years late, colonialism has spawned! In Portugal iirc. Either way, we're not getting any growth naturally in our lands.

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Hamburg has been peaced out as well, and we killed a protestant center of reformation, iirc. It had spawned there right before the war and I didn't notice until midway through. So that's one down, one to go, since we want to have one up and around. To lessen the AE gain for the time being.

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And speaking of lessening AE generation, we vassalize Lubeck instead of eating them. But that's fine, that means we can convert them at the same time, saving us cash in the process.

And that's where I'll end it off here! Next time is when I decide to stop being cutesy about it and just go HAM with ideas, hence why there was a lot of alerts about innovativeness possible from taking ideas, but I never did anything with it. Speaking of, we're already at about 50 innovativeness, so it's not like we're barely having any.

I hope you enjoyed and I'll see you in the next chapter!
 
As long as you continue, I'm good with it
I'm definitely planning on continuing. I won't let myself abandon this run, it'll take either a game over scenario, or some sort of bug that means that I can't continue (unavoidable CTDs, corrupt save, etc.)
 
Hello everyone, and welcome back to Belgium! I've got some mayo and frites ready for those who want some!

(Although, as an American, I will never understand why you'd put mayo on french fries. But to each their own, I guess)

Anywho, without further ado, let's get on with it!

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First on the agenda is annexing East Frisia. We WERE going to use them for claim fabrication and coring lands, but then I remembered that the AI is stupid and will return unlawful territory regardless of the fact that I would eat 10+ AE for taking it in a peace deal. Stupid AI... :rolleyes:

So we don't want them, we're better off fabricating and taking the land ourselves.

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And as I stated before, we're no longer being cutesy about our ideas, due to me changing the rule ever so slightly. So we have now unlocked our next national idea!

The Horrors of the Future

Having seen firsthand what the horrors of the Great War will reap upon Belgium, our generals have gone into overdrive, preparing our soldiers for the war to come. But if we're able to use said soldiers to prevent such a war, that would be even better.

Discipline +10%

Yup. The future of warfare has prepped us for these backwards wars. Or something. Maybe we just have really good whips. :eek:

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As @atwix had pointed out, allying Scotland would allow for easy invasion of Britannia, so we have done just that. Who needs naval combat when you can just use transports and a friendly border? ;)

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But, while we wait for our truce to end, let's bash the Dutch some more. Teach them for trying to weasel their way out of the Great War!

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And the Age of Reformation has finally arrived! We already have 2 of the objectives completed, as we've been RELIGIOUSLY converting our land and our enemies in the peace deal. With the AI not converting this patch, we gotta try and make Germany more than just one or two religions. And since Catholic is bound to die due to horrendous AI calculations, we may as well try and spread the Eastern Orthodoxy!

Plus, if we eat Orthodox land, we get less AE, which is very important in our buildup phase!

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We peace out Verden for their cash, trade power, and make them follow Orthodoxy. Our typical non-cobelligerent peace offer.

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But then, while we were sitting on our 100% as we made a claim on England (our last one expired without me noticing :mad:) and improved relations with our neighbors to prevent an early coalition, France DOW'd England for their Gascon provinces!

Naturally, we joined and waited for a chance to land in Scotland! Hopefully we'll get some land that we claimed as being "vitally important!"

But it's the AI, so I'm not holding my breath. :(

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Now, this is something that left me perplexed. Apparently, it will give me NEGATIVE WS to take Amsterdam, which was the wargoal. So this peace deal of 104 will go down to...

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..95? :confused:

I can't even. I just freaking can't. Just give me the goddamn province and flip religion, ok?

Christ alive this game sometimes... o_O

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Our regency has ended, and we have our idiot on the throne. But the heir is three shy of being PERFECT! But all the same, let's take a look at the pretender's stats...

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... 0/0/0 with a weak (-1) claim?

I think something went wrong with my game, this is REALLY weird, man! Maybe the Dutch have been giving me some of the devil's lettuce? :confused:

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We were able to land in Scotland, after carefully watching the English navy and their patterns. Time to take it to them, our 32k vs their 31k stack. We have the defensive advantage!

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A rough start, looks like we're both in need of a warm-up stretch! I KNEW we should have done our morning calisthenics! :oops:

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THAT'S more like it! A 10 to a 6 in the shock phase! :D

We didn't wipe them, but we hit them hard!

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While England licked their wounds, we sieged down Northumberland, and the English went to countersiege. But that was a trap! We can break them here and now! (Lost the screenshot, but we handily won the battle)

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After a bit more of sieging (the eastern Isle belongs to us ATM, we were working on the west), we charge into a battle!

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Reinforcements won't save you now!

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Now THAT'S a lotta damage!

And now, for the peacedeal from the AI! We got a grand total of...

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... jack squat! Nothing! Nada! Nashi! Other words for nothing!

I expected that, but I'm still disappointed after we did most of the work (albeit the war screen said we did ~25% of the work. Lying PoS, we fought so many battles and sieged down their entire homeland... :mad:)

Favors with France is nice, though.

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As I'm so upsetti by that peacedeal, let's take it out on the Germans!

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Saxony is fighting back. A futile effort. :cool:

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Reinforcements saved them this time. Next time, they won't get away.

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Another battle, another AI doomed to death :rolleyes:

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Absolutely tragic. ;)

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Can we get an F for the Frisians who thought that was a good idea?

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Saxony is bereft of reinforcements. Time to send them to meet the Frisian army.

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We're getting firmly into stackwipe territory. All according to plan!

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Friesland is out. They were too big to force religion on. But the real goal was to break their alliances with the Danes and Burgundians. That way we don't need to worry about them when we next fight. :cool:

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More of the standard peace deal. Busting up the reformation one nation at a time!

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We sack Dresden, but we want the professionalism! So we pay the cost and get the better armies!

More professionalism means less shock and fire damage taken. And since we're avoiding mercs this run (well, for as long as we can), we want professionalism to be at MAX!

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Saxony is peaced out for cash. Once again, too big to flip their religion.

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And we peace out Aachen. We don't want anything special from them, we mainly DOW'd them to get Friesland the break their alliances.

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And of course, Austria wants our help in Italy. And we say "why not?"

But we don't intend to help, our armies will be at home, drilling away.

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... Just because we were drilling, the AI thought that its 7k stack could kill our 16k stack.

AI gonna AI. :rolleyes:

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Now, here's something I DIDN'T know. I thought that Orthodox lands were immune to the reformation (or at least, had a VERY high modifier against being affected). But I guess that's not the case. Is this a recent patch thing? Was it like this before Golden Century? Dharma? Or is this a result of religious conversions being borked? Genuinely curious here :confused:

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Speaking of, here's the reformation thus far. We've been able to disrupt it a bit by killing a center in the north, and our forced conversions are working well. Brunswick actually had Orthodox zealots rise up and convert all their land, hence that blob of Orthodoxy just south of Denmark!

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For our next idea group, we take quantity! Because we need all the manpower we can get!

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Meanwhile, with an expanding manpower pool comes a better selection of generals. Say hello to our first 3 star general of the game!

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And I'll leave things off here with the natural order of things. Insulting the Danes!

I hope you all enjoyed and I'll see you in the next chapter!
 
should have declared on england and peace deal the dutch sooner :(
 
F. But a deserved one :p.
Hey, gotta give them what they deserve, am I right? ;)

should have declared on england and peace deal the dutch sooner :(

Yeah, mistakes were made. I was working on too many things at once, and I missed that my claims died. But it's fine, we got all the time in the world to kill them. It's England, for crying out loud, we can eat and destroy them lickity split! :p