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I am trying to start the game as Texas, and in dire need of an alliance with the USA, in the war against Mexico. My relationship with the USA is +178, but they will not accept my offer of an alliance. Why is this?
Well, first get the relations to 200 to have the maximum chance, and if you are at war with Mexico then I doubt the USA would want to join your alliance as it will send the nation to war.
Getting alliances when in war is a big no. The AI is quite foolish, but rarely accepts any such alliance. The best way to maximise alliance chances is peace+exclusion.
Don't forget that some countries (at least in VIP) are AI-driven towards some alliances (US-Texas, for instance).