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*sniff* God bless ol' King Gerry. Dont get his kind round here no more, no sir! Not like these modern kings!

With 25 kingdoms under his name, some of the Dukes must be fairly impressive... care to share with us some of the more powerful Dukes resumes, DW?
 
ARRGGHH! I go away for a long weekend and come back to find my liege dead (finally), succeeded by his son (Long live the Emperor! ;) ), and my good name smeared with the falsehood of being labeled a passer of a forgery. (Just because that's my job doesn't mean it can be bandied about like that, eh?) :D :rolleyes:

So with most of Europe and good portions of North Africa and the Middle East under the thumb of the House of Normandie, what's Edward gonna do for excitement? :eek:
 
Perhaps a strong cup of Brownian Motion Producer (say a nice hot cup of tea) could assist him in making this decision :)
 
One can hope and pray, Avernite. One can hope and pray.
 
Edward should drink, have fun with some pretty wenches and generally try to have a good time. Conquering some pagans perhaps? Giving some money to me perhaps? :D Nothing better than action to ease the pain.


An update of a different nature, however still a good read. I'm off to a small island in the baltics to celebrate the the longest day of the summer, so I won't be missing an update so soon. Hope you can write something next week however. It' would be a nice read before my roadtrip to Portugal.

Is Portugal yours by the way? :) :confused:
 
Edward needs to have 25 plus sons, and split the Empire between them. "You I dont like, so you get to be King of Bulgaria" "Aww, Dad! Cant I be King of Sweden?"

Hehe. The Royal Bucket Regiment stands ready, Imperator!
 
But wait! Only most of Europe is in his grip. The logical step, then, would be to get the rest of it, then conquer the rest of Africa and the Middle East.

Hmm... I wonder if there's an easter egg 'King of the World' title hidden somewhere in here?
king.gif
 
Excellent funeral description post. It's umpteen times better than the one I had for Torstein :)
 
Feedback to Feedback

Phew, wander a away for a minute and you're almost on page 9. This is beginning to look like a Farquharson AAR! :D Anyways, feedback.

King of Minors: I wanted to see if I could still write in a more serious vein, all this humour is wearing me down. Soul, 5/12ths, Henry V. Keiper's received. Now how do I make a link to a single post... :confused:

The_K: Well as far as conquest goes, the load should be fairly light, except for Qarakhnid and the Seljuk Turks, who both have 9+ demesne provinces. But we'll get there, if we are not too distracted by pretty wenches...

BBBD #1: Castle, what castle? I see nothing here but rubble. Must have been bombarded by coconut carrying african swallows....

Mac85:Welcome! Hang up your coat, I will see if I can work you in...

Mike von Bek #1: Not like these modern kings, eh? I guess not all king Gerald's old advisors will get promoted.... Some will be shoveling dung.

As to the dukes, I try to keep the buggers to their historical demesne as much as possible. Which is why my conquests can be a mite slow, since I don't use vassals to conquer places. The most powerful dukes, landwise, are Champagne, who owns Troyes, (Far too poor and too weak btw) Ile de France, Orleans, Sens and Lusignan. Then there's the Duke of Morroco, the duke of Finland (some finn), The Duke of Oultrejourdain, the duke/master of the hospitallers Order of Ascalon, the duke of Volga and the duke of Ural. Then there's a bunch with more than one title and little land. 9Includign the duke of Braganza and Coimbra, who holds the single province of Breda...) Also there are some independants like the heretic duchess of Ikonion and the triple Prince who lives right next to Byzantion and whose life will be ugly, brutish and short... No really outstanding dukes, few have more than two/three vassals. Little chance of succesful rebellion... I hope

Draco Rexus #1 : Long weekends are dangerous things. I should know, just look at all this feedback. And well, these things do run in families... There's plenty left to conquer in Russia and Mesopotamia. The Seljuks and Qarakhnids are doing quite well... :mad:

Lord Boreal:Welcome to you as well! Hmmmm, tea. First have to conquer a Tea producing province... Got Qat, opium, wine, beer, aqavit, whiskey and whisky, wodka, coffee, no tea I think. Something ought to be done about that...

Avernite: Edward less aggresive to his messengers? Yeah, right. He may be an egghead, but he is a de Normandie egghead! Don't you bring me no bad news!

Draco Rexus#2:Hope all you want, pray as hard as you like, just do not expect any miracles....

Deus #1: Portugal belongs to the de Normandie clan, even if its dukes live in Breda... Jerry conquered it quite early on in his illustrious carreer. Or at least conquered such provinces as were needed to make up the title. (the war against Leon/Castile) In my considered opinion, Portugal is Edward's
b!tch. :D


Mike von Bek#2:Split the Empire? SPLIT THE EMPIRE?!?!? Over my dead body!? And Edward's too! Anyway, there are too few sons, Edward only has three living sons... Though all would make pretty good monarchs. (Screenies later) The RBR had better be on stand by. If the army goes on campaign, many people will get the runs...

Deflare: i think if there was a King of the World Easter Egg, someone would have found it by now... More likely there is an "Your Empire collapses under it's own weight event... :p
Left to do: some of the choice real estate in Europe!
Norway, some bits of Ireland, Iceland and Russia. Also some nasty Arabs.

Jestor: Of course it was a nicer funeral! Gerald was far more powerful, actually liked by some people and not the winner of the Piss on the Pope competion ten years running. What did he expect? Hugs and kisses? :D

Meresin:Welcome! There should be a new screenie of Edward in the next update, whenever that might be...

Deus again: Gerald was cruel. I got all those ruler commits an act of cruelty things. Bloody annoying!

Actually Edward is a result of very careful breeding, with as little inbreeding as possible (which is getting harder by the generation, as the de Normandies spread.) And of course, lots of luck :D
 
Wherever there is soil, you will find us. Wherever there is dung, we shall be there. Wherever a steaming midden lies, we will be ready - bucket in hand. For we are the men of the Royal Bucket Regiment!

Leave no manure behind!
 
You gotta respect a man who enjoys his work, and you just gotta respect that man when he's a member of the Royal Bucket Regiment! :D

Can't wait to see where Edward decides to march first. I'm laying odds that's to the North first, and then after the Arabs. ;)
 
Lord Boreal:Welcome to you as well! Hmmmm, tea. First have to conquer a Tea producing province... Got Qat, opium, wine, beer, aqavit, whiskey and whisky, wodka, coffee, no tea I think. Something ought to be done about that...

What what what!? No tea? Well that is upsetting. I insist I tell thee tales of Ceylon and China, that way you may know what you are looking for and more importantly, where to get it from :D
 
King of Minors: I wanted to see if I could still write in a more serious vein, all this humour is wearing me down. Soul, 5/12ths, Henry V. Keiper's received. Now how do I make a link to a single post...
Like this:
Code:
(URL=http://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/showpost.php?p=4177592&postcount=177)
partiallly sold(/URL).
But changing () to [].
You can also change the text displayed by submitting "partially sold" for something else.
That is actually the "deed" posted above, so the only thing you have to change are the above mentioned things.
 
Not an Update, sorry!

Right, due to the fact my study felt like the inside of a toaster oven, moving my brotehr and his girlfriend from two houses into one and a very annoying game crash, I am way behind on my AAR schedule and foaming at the mouth at the injustice of it all. Also my computer fan is busted. The way things are looking now, the next update might be next thursday, but don't pin me down on this. Sorry :( Dead William
 
Well, don't that just bit the big one! :(

I say you take that axe from von Bek and take to your computer... that way you can get a new one! (but only after you take all your saved info off the soon to be executed computer, eh? :D