We really need more information on the OP's build vs. his friend. Races are absolutely not created equal now. If you, not fully understanding how everything comes together economically, stumble into an awful choice like Egalitarian and enabled Social Welfare/Utopian Abundance (especially without robots), you've basically shot yourself in the foot except it took you several decades to find out. Stuff like this pushes your support costs into the stratosphere and arguably does make edicts mandatory. On the other hand if your friend started with a Syncretic race whose workers produce +35% resources and have 1/3rd the support cost of your workers (not an exaggeration, it can be this high), they are going to pull way ahead regardless of skill.
Ignoring Clerks is fine. Clerks are not very productive pops. If on low habitability worlds (and/or using poor policies like shared burden) they are likely to cost more in maintaining than they produce.
What you do need though is amenities, either from entertainers (best early on) or domestic servants (best late game). Ideally you want to just meet your amenity needs, not going significantly over (wasteful for minor bonuses) or below (awful penalties).
The post also implies intentionally suppressing clerks, so my provisional diagnosis is that they shot their own foot by undervaluing trade & amenities, which would drive higher than normal technician employment and impose generally inferior productivity for all pops.
Ignoring Clerks is fine. Clerks are not very productive pops. If on low habitability worlds (and/or using poor policies like shared burden) they are likely to cost more in maintaining than they produce.
What you do need though is amenities, either from entertainers (best early on) or domestic servants (best late game). Ideally you want to just meet your amenity needs, not going significantly over (wasteful for minor bonuses) or below (awful penalties).