Chapter VI: A Song of Ice and Mud
“All he talks about is the Night’s Watch,” my brother, Torghen, complained to me once they have returned to Winterfell with my betrothed. “He’s like, ‘I heard a wildling rose up to be the Lord Commander,’ and I’m just sitting there enduring all this. So what if a wildling became in charge of a frosty wall? It’s all the way up there and we’re all the way down here.”
“You sure know how to sell the man I’m going to marry,” I replied. “And don’t make fun of the Night’s Watch. Meliana’s father,Domeric, and Heward Quagg joined the Watch, remember?”
“Man? He’s only three namedays ahead of me and I’m better than him with a sword!” He scoffed. “All of the Starks are cravens even Lord Robb. The guy is as good with a sword as I am but I can still see him tremble inside his armor. I can’t believe father lowers his head for such a boy.” Torghen paused and looked at me quizzically. “Why aren’t you with Jon? Shouldn’t you be talking to him instead of me?”
“Ah… No, mother told me that I shouldn’t meet with my betrothed before the day of the wedding.” I hesitated for a moment. “She told me to enjoy my time with my friends.”
“But you don’t have any friends,” he mocked. I could almost hear him laughing hysterically inside his head.
I sighed. “Yes, I don’t have any friends.”
“Come on, don’t say that! I’m your friend.” Said Barba Dea, a girl the same age as me and the daughter of my father’s most loyal bodyguard, Summer. We grew up together as playmates along with her brother, Mycah.
“I didn’t see you there, Barba.” Accompanied with a smile that Aglantine, my mentor, taught me. It always makes everyone around me smile back. “Are you here for something?”
“Oh, yes, m’lady,” she said with an exaggerated courtsy. “Your mother awaits you with gowns straight out of White Harbor. She told me to call you.”
“Gowns? Blech!” My brother exclaimed. “Mother didn’t call for me as well, right?”
“No, but I think your father needs you for something. Oh, I think your father’s bannermen already arrived.” Barba answered.
“Another blech! He wants me to greet them, doesn’t he?” Torghen never did have any skills in diplomacy. “Fine, I’ll head there now.” My brother slouched and walked away.
“Isn’t it great?” Barba said, interrupting the silence as we walk across the hall to my mother’s room. “You’re going to marry a Stark.”
“A Stark bastard,” I corrected her. “Torghen’s the one who’s going to marry a Stark, not me. He’ll also get Greywater Watch even though I’m older and smarter.”
“Nonetheless, he still have Stark blood and the last Stark to marry a woman from the Neck is the King of Winter who slew the last Marsh King.” She’s getting too excited about the comparison, it seems. “Unlike me, you’re beautiful and smart and … a Reed. My father says, ‘No power can stop us,’ the words of House Dea. But the reason why no one can stop us is because there’s no reason to, we never move. I’m probably just going to end up as some old man’s wife.” Her eyes started to swell up with tears.
I pulled her close to me and rested her head on top of my chest while I wrapped my arms around her. “Come now, don’t be sad,” soothing words to soothe her mind. “What ever will be, will be.” I then lifted her head to face mine. “I’ll always be your friend and I’ll always be with you.” I gave her a kiss on her forehead.
She pulled back immediately afterwards. Her face flushed and her movements became awkward. “No, sorry, this isn’t right. I… I have to be excused. Pardon me, sorry. Goodbye.” Then she walked away rather fast. Such an odd girl, we’ve played kissing games together with Meliana before. She was never embarrassed back then why was she embarrassed now. Besides, it was only on the forehead.
A little later, I finally reached my mother’s room and inside I found her and Aglantine looking at gowns laid on the bed. “Oh, here you are!” my mother cheered. “Come quick! Try out these gowns!”
The dresses are all bought from White Harbor and made from the finest silk. Mother says it’s to show off how rich House Reed has become since the war against the Mad King, fourteen years ago. We are probably one of the richest house in the North. “We need a gown that shows off your slender body and hide the fact that your breasts are barely there.” Aglantine commented.
“The boy is only fourteen, I doubt he’ll pay that much attention to detail.” My mother argues.
“The boy is fourteen, that’s all he’ll pay attention to,” Aglantine jests. “In any case, the gown must be both fierce and beautiful like a lizard-lion.” But lizard-lions aren’t beautiful, their big, scaly and look like logs floating in the river, I thought to myself.
I tried on multiple gowns but it seems like nothing fits the description that Aglantine suggested. Until I tried the very last one. It has a close-fitting grey-green bodice with a neckline edged with plush black velvet. Its flowing skirt is adorned with black lizard-lions walking across a grey-green field. “I like this one,” I told my mother and Aglantine.
“A good choice,” my mother agreed.
“We’re all set then,” Aglantine announced.
The day of my wedding has come. I can see my betrothed, Jon Snow, waiting in front of the heart tree in the Sunk Grove. Rows of chairs form an aisle in which my father gently held my hand as he escorted me across. As I walk across the aisle, I saw the guests that attended my wedding. Luwelyn Cray; the Master of Castle Cray, Sheryl Fenn; the Lady of Silvereed, Bohemund Blackmyre; the Lord of Greycrann, Eyron Marsh; the Lord of Churwell, Gariss; Master of the Grey Dun and others from court. Beside Jon stands Benjen Stark and there is no sign that any of his siblings attended the wedding. Once I reached the heart tree, my father gave my hand to Jon and left to stand beside my brother.
Jon and I looked at each other’s eyes and said our vows in front of the heart tree. My father once taught me that no one can lie in front of a heart tree. But, it’s probably just baseless superstition since I find myself saying words that doesn’t mean anything to me. The vow is not even my own words. Aglantine wrote my vow for me. This is Aglantine’s vow not mine. In my mind, I’m saying different things. In my mind, I’m praying to the gods to unmake this union. I want to wed an actual Stark or a prince not a bastard. If I’m going to be married then let me marry a lord with a big castle.
After we said our vows, I turned around so Jon may coat me and bring me under his protection. Since he’s a bastard, he is not allowed to use a coat with the sigil of House Stark. Instead, my father gave him a coat with the sigil of our House. When the coating is done, the feast followed. Jon and I sat on a reserved seat where the guests can come up and congratulate us and give us gifts. I smiled, I laughed and I teased as I was taught and this gave the everyone the impression that I am the happiest girl alive. Especially Jon, who sat beside me with a nervous smile. Torghen talked about how Jon won’t stop talking about the Night’s Watch but right now he won’t even talk. Does he even like me, I wonder.
We stayed awkwardly silent to each other until Jon’s uncle, Benjen, came by and whispered something to his ear. Whatever it is, it made him blush and nervously turned to me. “I hear you like lizard-lions,” he forced himself to say.
“I hate lizard-lions, they’re big, scaly and looks like logs floating on the river.” I replied
“Oh… Um, do you like frogs?” He forced himself once more.
“Why do you ask? Is it because I’m a crannogman?” I may be a little miffed at him.
“Ah… no. Sorry, my uncle told me that I need to get to know my wife but I’m not really good at talking to... women. And I’ve only met you once years ago when we were both very young.” I remember that day, that was when my father took us to Winterfell where he swore fealty to Robb Stark. “It’s not because I don’t like you or anything. You look very beautiful, far more than I ever could imagine, and I know that you are a good person… I’m just not used to all of this.”
I don’t know if its because of compliments but, I found myself smiling after hearing all those things. “Well…” I decided that I might as well get to know my husband. “My father and brother never lacked for stories to tell, do you have one? A girl always like a good story, you can start with that.”
A smile crept up his face and said, “Well there was this one time when Jorah and I lead Robb down to the crypts beneath Winterfell and…” Soon I found myself dancing with Jon. We danced until we’re the last ones on the dancefloor and that is when my raised his cup and announced...
The day after the wedding, the guests are starting to leave. Jon said his final farewells to his Uncle Benjen while holding back his tears. Everyone who attended thinks that we are both happily in love and the wedding became the talk of the North days to come. My father’s image greatly improved and House Reed’s vassals now feel proud of their liege lord and more eager to serve.
Weeks went by as if its a dream. Jon and I spent every moment with each other since the wedding. We went hunting, riding and visited towns together, always together. Jon would bring me flowers that he picked in the forests and I would give him a kiss in return. Barba, Meliana and my little sister, Maege, would make fun of us whenever they saw us having a picnic beneath a tree. This all ended when Jon came to me one day with flowers in his hand riddled with fever.
This can’t be happening, I thought to myself. I called for the maester to see if he can help him. He told me that he has caught the Bloody Flux and forbade me to be near him. I refused at first but after the maester, accompanied by my mother, told me of the dangers the Bloody Flux can do, I backed down. Instead, I went down to the Sunk Grove and prayed to the heart tree. I saw my father do it when my brother was born as a sick babe and it worked, now my brother is a healthy boy. I prayed day and night to the gods. Praying for the life of my beloved. I told the gods that I don’t want any other husband. I told them that I would give up anything so that we can live as husband and wife.
One night, I sneaked into Jon’s room and found him sleeping soundly. I sat beside him and before long I too fell asleep. I woke up to the sensation of Jon’s hand gently petting my hair. The first thing I saw that day was his smile.
A year later, my belly swelled up with child and then, not long after, a beautiful boy was born. We named him Leobald, after noone in particular.
I was watching Jon caress Leobald in his arms and I can’t help myself but to smile at the sight. I have been taught my entire life how to fake my smiles, gestures and emotions in order please the people around me. But, the smiles this man get from me are not fake. My real smiles, my real laughs, and my real everything are all for him. Only for him.
He looked at me with a puzzled look in his eyes. “Why are you looking at me like that? Am I doing something wrong?”
I giggled then replied, “You really do know nothing, Jon Snow.”
