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The Past (18th June 1682) - Two days later

I make a final inventory of the contents to be put into the small sack on my bed – one good set of clothes, the clothes I had taken from the Red Lion, a spare pair of boots, and a cape. I ponder adding my box with its bottle of ink and freshly cut quills, but I do not think I will need them. I wrap the fine clothes in the cape, and stuff the rough garb from the Lion into the boots. Together they half-fill the sack. I add a large piece of linen, and rope the top closed. I place my dagger in my belt. I stop and caress my chest with its compartment. I am tempted to open it, to take Father’s notes, but I will not risk them. If my study has been insufficient it is unlikely I will have the opportunity to consult them.

Gunter is in the stables. “Are you ready, monsieur?” he asks as I hand over the sack, but I shake my head.

“I must first see de Tallon. Immediately after that we ought to leave.”

“We are all prepared here, we will wait for you.”

I nod. “Thank you.” I march back into the main building, and stomp up the stairs to de Tallon’s study. The door is ajar.

I walk nearer and Henri calls out, “Do come in Jean. You did say last night you wanted to see me this morning.”

I step inside, and close the door. The room is as full of paper as ever. Henri frowns at a letter, scribbles a comment, and moves it onto another pile.

He looks up. “You are lucky, you know, not to have been bogged down in parchment from the moment you arrived.”

“I will need to be absent for some days,” I say without preamble.

He blinks. “Again? I had thought that with Pierre dispatched…”

“Our problems would be over?” I complete, though I know they were not his words. “Do you really think that?”

“Of course I don’t,” he snaps, and adds, “I had thought that you would not be needing to make another excursion.”

“Henri,” I say, leaning forward, “in an ideal world I would not have to have made the last one. But when danger next threatens it will be easier for me to act if it is already known I spend much of my time outside this place. And truly, do you think the Ambassador will miss me?”

“He might well hold it against you,” he replies.

I shrug. “Just say that you told me to keep an eye close to the ground.”

He pauses. “You came to this meeting prepared,” he says. I nod. “Do you know how long you are likely to take?”

“To be honest – no. It is probably safer to say that at the latest I will return on Monday, if only for a few hours.”

“Very well,” he says, and sighs. “It is not like I can stop you, with what we have wagered…” he lapses into a silence, and picks up the next item on his desk that needs his attention. I wait for a moment, and leave.

Gunter is as good as his word. The horses are already hitched to the cart. He shows me the little space he has constructed amidst the cargo – mostly barrels that once contained all manner of things for the kitchen. Once a week, sometimes more, some of the guards take the cart around the city picking up orders, and once a week they make another journey, returning empties. It is another trick from Bernhardt’s repertoire, and rather less dangerous than precipitating a riot. I notice my sack perched on the back.

“Excellent,” I say, and take out the boots. I smile at Gunter. “I had to look good for de Tallon.” He takes my meaning as soon as he sees the tatty clothes, and protects my privacy for the few minutes that it takes me to change. My own clothes I bundle together with the extra piece of linen. They are only casual, as such things go, but still worth enough to be treated with a little care.

I am retying the sack when the Captain appears. “All set?” he asks in Bavarian.

“I am now,” I say, and clamber into the cart. I stumble as something shifts, and land awkwardly in my assigned spot. Bernhardt passes up my bag. “Try not to bang anything,” he says, “even the dimwits watching the gates might get suspicious if there was a ruckus in the back.”

It is a poor joke, but I still laugh. Gunter calls in another guard, and under Bernhardt’s direction they pile on the remaining barrels, entombing me. I hear some muted speech, and with a lurch the cart begins to move. It is very dark, but chinks of light spear through the gloom. I close my eyes, and try not to sneeze. I pray I am not about to make a mistake.
 
Hmm.. Let me do a quick retake:
one good set of clothes, the clothes I had taken from the Red Lion, a spare pair of boots, and a cape.
Not quite a cloak, but we also have:
I place my dagger in my belt.
Close enough! More cloak and dagger stuff! Huzzah!

Jean definitely seems more of a spy recently than a diplomat. Of course, the line between the two can get rather blurry... Nice picture, of Jean stowed away amongst the empty barrels, sneaking out of the embassy again.
 
You came to this meeting prepared
Did he have doubts?


Bavarians can definitely be handy. Oh, BTW, is Bavaria under Spanish rule too? I would say it's likely since Spain is on her way to WC (no, no, it's not Water Closets).

Jean is trying to free his hands as much as possible, which might come in handy later, even after he's become calife in stead of the calife and set up his little secret passage...
 
Ahh, the intrigue!

I enjoy the way Jean deals with his superiors, as well as with his inferiors.

Still a very nice guy who is nevertheless on the ball and knows when something nasty needs to be done.

I like his Bavarian entourage, also.

Rensslaer
 
Stuyvesant said:
Hmm.. Let me do a quick retake: Not quite a cloak, but we also have: Close enough! More cloak and dagger stuff! Huzzah!

Jean definitely seems more of a spy recently than a diplomat. Of course, the line between the two can get rather blurry... Nice picture, of Jean stowed away amongst the empty barrels, sneaking out of the embassy again.
:rofl: cloak & dagger :rofl:
 
And where to now, I wonder? Is it time to begin his nasty work? Or do we have yet another layer to lay atop what we already know? I am eager to find out and pleased to see so many great updates flowing out recently. Keep it coming, good sir! :D
 
I love the set up of a good cloak & dagger escapade!

I pray I am not about to make a mistake.

Well, Jean, old son, it's a little to late for that, but at least you have not yet become so jaded that you don't even second guess it. That line, I believe, shows that Jean is above all else, human. He will do what needs to be done for the safety of his country, but he will agonize over it. Nicely done, stnylan, as usual. :)
 
most excellent ! ! :D

time for an assassination, is it? ? :cool:
 
coz1 said:
And where to now, I wonder? Is it time to begin his nasty work? Or do we have yet another layer to lay atop what we already know? I am eager to find out and pleased to see so many great updates flowing out recently. Keep it coming, good sir! :D

knowing our character (and the author) there will likely be yet another layer of deliciousness added to this sublime dessert
 
kingmbutu said:
knowing our character (and the author) there will likely be yet another layer of deliciousness added to this sublime dessert
I certainly hope so as it is tasty, to be sure. Not quite marmite, but delicious nonetheless.

Wait a minute...I never did try the marmite, did I? ;)

Update please. :)
 
Just caught up, and I must say that it is as masterful as ever! I winced for my own leg when reading that scene. :wacko:
 
stnylan, finally caught up with this wonderful tale of yours. I must confess I sympathized with Bertrand, or more precisely, his leg.

Now, normally when I think of cloak and dagger, Madrid doesn't come to the forefront. From now on, however, Madrid may be my first thought on the subject. Great writing! Keep it up! :)
 
J. Passepartout Gunter mostly knows to do as he is told. Learning the ropes from Captain Bernhardt. We first met him being slighly indiscreet as a gate-guard, when Carlos de Aranda and Jean first met, if that helps jog your memory.

Stuyvesant Well in the day and age I am portraying I would say there was no fine line between spy and diplomat. Or instead of spy say foreign operative. Actually, I am fairly willing to believe the same is also true today.

Nil-The-Frogg I haven't really said much about Bavaria's role in all of this yet. But in the next few updates keep you eyes open.

Rensslaer Well, there is no harm in Jean being nice. If it helps him get what he needs it is all to the good. Of course, as has been shown, he can be nasty too.

kingmbutu Yes, the second time I have inserted this rather obvious pun. It amuses me, but I'll leave it for others to judge what that makes of my sense of humour ;)

coz1 Well unfortunately the spring ran dry again, but I think you might quite like what is due to come now.

Draco Rexus I think this is another of the differences between this young Jean and the old Jean. Can you imagine Bertrand's murderer thinking that thought?

GhostWriter Oh quite possibly - but there other things that need to happen too!

kingmbutu (2) You flatterer you! :D

coz1 (2) No, you never did taste the glorious Marmite. That delight still awaits you ;)

anonymous4401 Yes, it was definitely that kind of scene. Like chalk scraping on a blackboard.

fj44 Oh I don't know, irl I'm pretty sure 17th century Madrid would have been fairly nefarious for such things given Spain was still quite important then.

All Well, as I said in a reply to coz1 above, the burst of activity dried up pretty quickly, at least in part because I realised I had reached a place of opportunity. Although I know in a broad sense where this story I am purposefully winging the details, and so when a new thought comes to me sometimes I need to take some time for it to perculate through my system. Actually, I have two particular thoughts here, but the next immediate update is basically written. Before I post it however I need to get down a few more details of the sequence, so I may not round to posting it tonight.

However, this little period of calm has also opened another window, which I would like to share with you, and I hope you will forgive me for a little indulgence on my part.

A few of my readers might remember from past comments on the boards or past conversations that one of my favourite authors is C J Cherryh. This week I have read, after having the book sitting on my shelves for a long time, Cyteen, a novel from her Alliance-Union universe. It is the sort of book that makes me feel small inside as a writer, and inspires me to try to be larger than I am. It is hardly the first time that her work has had that effect on me. It is a novel about characters - that is the characters are the driving force in the storyline, not the plot. Two characters in particular, both set in a world seething with hatred and betrayal, and with the sort of History that deserves the capital letter. Cherryh writes science fiction, but unlike say Peter F Hamilton or David Weber (to mention two more recent authors) where the Plot drives the Story, and the characters revolve around it, Cherryh writes in what I consider to be a different vein. To put it simply, the wider Plot is very much the background, the setting. The Characters are the driving force. It is what I am trying (though I think only partially successfully) to do with "Memory".

Second, in many of her stories - and "Cyteen" is no exception - one of the main characters (though not always the central one) is what I call an alienated male - a male human out of his natural environment, or a serious loner, or someone largely at odds with the world about him (for good or bad reasons), or someone in self-imposed exile. The comparison with "Memory" should be clear enough. I am sure other readers of Cherryh would be able to find other comparisons, some probably conscious on my part, and some probably not.

Anyway, what am I trying to say? Well, part of the interesting things about writing this AAR, and I think about reading it from what people have said, is looking at old Jean and young Jean and seeing the difference between the two. Well, something similar (though not the same) occurs in "Cyteen" with a number of characters. It is very illuminating seeing something similar to what you are doing in a work by an author whom you tremendously respect. It has allowed me to write the next sequence, and given me the confidence to try and do so. It is something I had thought about a lot before I read "Cyteen", but the implementation is different. The opportunity I mentioned earlier makes it possible. But seeing that similar occurence allowed me to think just how much I have been trying to work into "Memory". There are, of course, elements here from other authors, but I do not doubt that Cherryh is to the fore.

Anyway, I hope that did not bore you all to tears. Time for me to have my dinner and get these last details worked out. Hmm, and the lure of the Tigers-Yankees might keep me away from the AAR as well come to think about it.
 
Excellent feedback session, stnylan, and I think you recognize my own desire to establish such a driving force of a story. To my way of thinking, you've done plenty well to do so in your own effort without having ever read Cherryh myself.

And yes, the glories of marmite still await me. Perhaps I may yet still if I get that trip to England off the ground for next year. Still working on it.

Oh...and Go Tigers! :D And Go Dawgs! (Though I doubt you'll be up that late...or early. ;) )
 
Wow, did not know about this author. I may have to read her (either in original version, or a translation, but they are sometimes horrific). I'm always interested when I read good authors (that's you, Stnylan ;) ) explain their motives and the hiden face of their work. Characters driven? I always like (love? :rolleyes: ) my characters, even when I try to make them unappealing. That's strange: I always put the focus on the plot, but the characters seem to revolt and start to develop in their own way, forcing me to adjust the story accordingly...

Eager to follow your tale where it goes! :)
 
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Nil-The-FroggWell, as I say Cherryh is one of my favourites. I have no idea if any of her work is translated into French (it is French, right? - I sometimes do not trust my memory ;) ). I may sometime write an Advocate article or similar on my ideas of differences betwen plot, character, and atmosphere. But you are right, characters do have a life of their own, or I think it would be better to say that as we write we just get to know them better than we did at first. Hope you enjoy this coming update.

coz1 Well, the game did get in the way of the update. Good to watch though, even if rather lop-sided. And no, I didn't watch the Dawgs (though I note it is, unfortunately, time for commiserations there) - with the LDS going on and being put out live over here there is less college football being shown on NASN.

And indeed, Into the West is very much what I would describe as a character driven story. To the point where some of the larger plot is itself setting, background if you will.



Update follows...
 
The Past (18th June 1682) - Continued

The wagon sways and rumbles as it makes it slow journey. The barrels muffle the sounds of the city, the bustle is reduced to a humming. It is hot, covered in that place, and my eyes begin to close. I might as well. There is nothing I can do until we arrive, and Gunter will be sure to wake me. I shift my bag so that it acts as a pillow, and allow myself to drift…

Memory (April 1672)

“Be careful with that dress Marianne,” Mother says, “or you will ruin it before your father arrives.”

“Yes mama,” his sister replies, curtseying.

“I cannot see him yet,” Louis says. He is sitting at the window sill, staring out into the fog.

“Well of course not,” mother replies, “you cannot even seen the garden gate on a day like this. Now get down here and behave!”

“Yes mama,” Louis says with a sigh. He stands and walks to one of the chairs. Before he sits he casts a last glance at the window. Mother notices, but does not say anything. She calls for one of the nurses, and leaves us alone as she goes to ready Philippe and Anne-Marie.

Marianne pulls a stool next to my chair. “Why is He coming now?” she asks. Louis shrugs.

“I do not know,” I say, “but there is usually a reason.”

“Everything has a reason,” Louis says, repeating a line of Father’s.

“Well?” Marianne insists.

“He only comes here when the King lets him,” Louis says.

“When the King calls him to Paris,” I correct. Louis looks angry at me, and I smile. “He always visits when he does.”

“But mama said He will stay for a whole week!” Marianne exclaims, excitement making her crease her dress. “He’s not done that for ages and ages.” Louis does not say anything, and neither do I. She frowns at us both. “It cannot be good, can it?” she says after a moment.

I shake my head. She looks very serious, and I see the thought grow in her. She is a big girl now, she can figure this stuff out. I remember thinking the same thing, two or three years ago, waiting for Father to arrive on one of His visits. I wonder if Louis felt something similar, but he has always been the Eldest, and that is different.

Mother re-enters, carrying a sleepy Anne-Marie, Philippe trailing. “Come children,” she says. “Old Gaston has just said they are stabling the carriage horses. Walk!” she shouts as both Marianne and Louis start to run. They do not hear her. I follow them, walking.

He is already in the Hall; I wait at the stairs. Marianne clings to him, her arms about His neck. She is speaking quickly, and He is laughing and smiling. He picks her up and swings her about, and puts her down. Louis is waiting a few feet away. He looks at him, and says something I cannot quite hear above Marianne’s giggles. They shake hands, and He pats his shoulder.

Mother sweeps by, Philippe in tow. When He sees Her He makes that special smile He has for Mother. They do not cuddle, but He looks down at the sleepy Anne-Marie. His smile widens, and He tickles her chin. He says something else, and then kneels down to bring him level with Philippe, who grasps Mother’s hand tightly. I start to make my way down the stairs.

He stands and sees me. Something changes in his face. For a moment He watches me, and I watch Him. He makes three quick strides to me, and grasps me under the shoulder. With a wrench He lifts me high, and I shout.

He puts me down. “You are getting too heavy Jean,” He says with a smile.

“Welcome home Father,” I say, “we’ve been waiting.”

He laughs. “I am sure you have. Now, why don’t we all get something to eat?”

Philippe breaks free of Mother and races Marianne to the Dining Room, Louis tries to be serious, and I follow.

Louis and Marianne sit either side of Father, Marianne telling Him everything that has happened to people, real and imagined, since He was last here. He listens with a smile on His face, sometimes asking Louis a question on our sister’s outpouring. Philippe sits across from Father, and once cries for some attention. With a laugh Father draws him into the conversation. Mother, sitting at one end of the table, fusses over little Anne-Marie, who is waking up with all the noise. I sit at the other end, quiet. He looks relaxed, His face lit with joy. Marianne snuggles herself under one of His arms as Philippe tells Him about his new pony.

“And what have you been doing Jean?” He asks, turning to me, those bright piercing eyes challenging.

“Learning,” I answer.

He laughs, “Learning what?”

“All those languages Masters Rodrigo and Guiseppe can teach. Spanish and English, Bavarian and German, Greek and Latin, Italian, and a little Danish, Dutch, and Flemish – but they do not know much of that themselves. And history and books.” I make a face, “I do not like Plato.”

“I’ve been doing that too,” Louis interrupts, “but I think Plato is excellent. He really thinks!” From beneath His arm Marianne sticks her tongue out at Louis, and grins at me.

“Now, now, we don’t need to rehash philosophy at this table,” Father laughs, and then asks something of Philippe whose face has screwed up.

The rest of the day passes like that. Philippe shows Him the pony, and grooms him just as he has been instructed. Father offers a little advice, and the rest of us stay silent. Marianne stands at the edge of the stable, with Mother, ordered to keep her dress clean. Marianne presents Him with some of her embroidery; Louis and I take Him into our study. He looks at our books and inspects our desks, including the third desk that Marianne sits at, even though Mother does not like it. He does. He sees our writing, compliments us three on our penmanship. We have dinner, and at the end, when Philippe is starting to fall asleep and Anne-Marie has already been taken to her cot, Father calls us three together. Mother takes Philippe away, and He sits us down together in the Drawing Room. He kneels on the floor, and leans back on his heels.

“Children, I have something to tell you.”

We are in separate chairs. Louis is in the middle and I cannot see his face. Marianne leans forward, her face furrowing as she concentrates.

“You are all old enough that it is time you know some things. Louis, because you are my heir, Jean because you are my son, and Marianne because you are my daughter. Do you understand why I have been called back to Paris?”

We shake our heads. “About six weeks ago King Ferdinand of Bavaria visited Madrid. While he was there the King signed a treaty. Of course, the Bavarians have been allied to the Spanish and Genoese for many years. This was something new. King Ferdinand pledged that he and all his successors would forever recognise the King of Spain as their suzerain – their overlord.”

“But Father,” Louis says, “you’ve told us that King Carlos is, is not … very good.” He blushes. Children do not speak ill of Kings, even when they are far away.

“King Carlos is served by some very able men, as are all Kings. And King Ferdinand must look to Bavaria’s future. To the north lies Denmark, which crushed a revolt in Saxony recently. Southward and eastwards is the Empire, and the Emperor Ferdinand has always considered himself the natural ruler of all Germany.” He leans forward. “Do you understand?”

Louis says nothing, but I see Marianne’s face, and let her speak. “Is it,” she says, a quiver in her voice, “ is he – King Ferdinand I mean – is he going to continue ruling?”

He smiles. “For the most part. Spanish merchants will get certain rights in Bavaria, and be allowed to be tried under Spanish laws, but when it comes to Bavaria itself King Ferdinand will still rule. There are other details, but I will not bore you with them.”

“Details are important,” I say, echoing a saying of His.

He nods. “They are,” he agrees, “but for the purpose of this discussion we can ignore them. Marianne?”

“He gives up a little to save a lot – like when I agree to a small thing that Nanny wants, so that I can do something I want.” Marianne is always been open with Father.

“Very true. Now, I am here a week. I have things I need to teach you – all your regular lessons will be postponed. Remember what I tell you. If you do not understand it now, you will later.” He yawns. “Let us go and find your Mother, and then the three of you need to go to your beds. You will have a long day tomorrow.”

And we rise.
 
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It's as though the fog begins to clear just slightly. By offering us this look back to Jean's earlier time with his father, we begin to see what he is as a man, which then informs his later actions. Excellent work. And timely, I believe.
 
Finally we get a direct look at father, although not actually a direct look because this is merely a memory... But quite interesting nonetheless. May I assume the reason father is home is because the French government is in full worry mode over these developments and wants him to report in person?