China: The Empire Strikes Back (on Bavaria)

juszuf7 · 09-11-2002, 20:48

Well this is just a game I played with China. By reading Heagarty's Gluttonic Knights, I suddenly got the feeling that I have to try and reverse the whole thing. The following is the short story about that

The snow was fallin in its usual fashion when a servant ran up the Chinese imperial palace and interrupted emperor Yongle in his meditation. Yongle was a very evil man, and he needed all the psychic power he could get to deal with himself. Terrible tales were told of what happened when someone broke his practice. Yongle’s eyes would turn red. His fangs would jump out, and hair would grow on his back. Emperor Yongle would turn into a monster, and not even the Gods could help the poor man that dared to disturb him.

“Emperor Yongle! Emperor Yongle! Terrible news from the other side of the world!”
“Speak out, my dear servant”
“A small nation called Bavaria has pledged to conquer the Middle Kingdom!”
“Oh, my!”
“What shall we do, Emperor Yongle?”

It was quite clear what has to be done. The Chinese had to strike pre-emptively, before all would be lost. Emperor Yongle called his advisors, and asked them for their advice.
“We don’t know where this Bavaria is, your highness. All we know is that it’s on the other side of the world”
“Well how can we reach this terrible foe?”, asked Yongle.
“There are two ways: we could reach them by sea, or we could march through enemy territory and fight them on land. Which one would you prefer?”
“BOTH!”, said the Emperor, and his words are the Law. The Imperial explorer, Zheng Ho was sent to find a sea route to Bavaria, while the Chinese troops gathered at the Chagatai border. Emperor Yongle was leading them.
“My men, you are defending your homeland, and let none of you forget about that! Now fight!”

There was no real resistance to tell you the truth. The Chagatai Mongols were building a fort in one of the bordering provinces, but their work was interrupted when the province was captured. After that Yongle marched on, until he finally encountered resistance in Bogda Shan.
The 2000 men enemy army was annihilated a few minutes after this encounter, and the Chagatai capital was put under siege. Later that year, the Chagatai surrendered all their possessions, except their capital.

In the meantime, a meteor has dropped somewhere in China. This has upset the entire people so much, and especially the emperor, that he decided to move his capital to the north. He did not expect, however, that this would further upset the people. The people were so Unhappy, that the entire country destabilized and almost reached anarchy (-2 stab). That is why Yongle decided that he needs to set the people’s minds away from their troubles, so he declared war on Chagatai once more, even though a peace treaty was signed only two weeks earlier.

And Yongle was right. After Chagatai was annexed in February, 1420, the people cheered and stability was recovered by the end of the year (to 0, that is).

Time was running out for the Chinese. The Bavarians could arrive any moment now! The independence-war that Dai Viet declared at the beginning of 1420 was concluded by the end of the year, and Yongle allowed that state to go free. In the meantime, a Buddhist monk visited him in his new capital.
“So, this is your new capital, huh Yongle?”
“How dare you speak to me with that tone, monk?”
“I am guided by Buddha, Yongle, and I fear nothing”
“Well I am guided by Konfuce, monk, and your Buddha should be afraid. Very afraid.”

After the monk was executed, punishment squads were sent to the two Buddhist provinces in an attempt to convert the people there. But Yongle did not bother with the issue any longer. He ordered that those who wouldn’t comply with the new order be sent to the new colony of Bogorodsk.

After securing military access with Malacca, the explorer Zheng Ho reached the eastern shores of India. And he found out that there was nothing there, so he went back to Malacca and began exploring the western shores of Indochina. He discovered that too, and established contact with Orissa. Then he went back to India, and established contact and military access with Vijayanagar. After that he sailed further, and reached Oman and the Horn of Africa.

The clock was ticking, and 1426 came. The Chinese troops crossed the Timurid border. As expected, there was no real resistance, and after a short two year war the Timurids lost all their territory. Yongle was not hungry on territory, however – all he wanted was to reach Bayern, so all he took was the northern provinces. Another year has passed, stability recovered and war was declared on the Uzbekhs. The Uzbekhs were even easier than the Timurids, though their territory was more fortified.

Zheng Ho advanced further, in the meantime, and from the small island of Zanzibar he sent expeditions to discover the south of Africa. The climate on the south was favorable, and he sent the message to the emperor that settlers could be sent, to establish a support colony in Karroo.

The message that he received was somewhat confusing. It seems that Emperor Yongle died in 1424, and some pretenders just used his name to confuse the world. Why, it was not clear. Probably to aide the Bavarians. Anyway, Zheng Ho’s brother, Zheng Tong grabbed the power for himself, and signed a peace treaty with the Uzbekhs, giving a lot of territory to the Chinese. The year was 1435, and the Chinese people desperately needed more war.

Zhengtong could not provide them enough wars because the stability has not yet recovered. One of the Buddhist provinces was converted, in the meantime, while the other resisted. This angered Zhengtong, and he said that all Buddhists are going to be repressed and hated. Not surprisingly, the province revolted the same month he said this. He did not care. Neither did the people of that province, and they defected to some foreign power a couple of years later.

The colony in Karroo was established, and Zheng Ho explored the seas even further. He reached an island he called Fernando Po, and called for colonists there again.

In 1437 stability was finally recovered, and war was declared on Nogai. This country had the Golden Horde for an ally. “Excellent”, thought Zhengtong, as he was hatching schemes to defeat the Golden Horde too. Suddenly, a servant came and brought the news of the death of his brother. The explorer Zheng Ho secured military access with Benin, and was very close to reach Bavaria, when he was attacked by sea monsters and died. It was very sad, but the emperor had to go on. The Bavarians could attack any time!

In 1438, Nogai surrendered all its territory except their capital. The Emperor was so happy he wanted to do something good for his people, so he choose to Internally perfect China. Everyone was very happy, and despite sky high stability, the stability rose even further (I had +3 stability and I’ve got 6 more

). It was good that they were so happy, because this way they didn’t notice the amount of their sons that died in Golden Horde. The winters there were quite harsh, and the Chinese tactics to send waves after waves of cavalry did not help those starving and freezing to death. Another blow came when Astrakhan declared its independence while being besieged by the Chinese. They said their country was not at war, so even after the fort was captured it had to be handed over to the Astrakhani. Too bad!

In April, 1440, the Golden Horde accepted a peace deal in which they ceded all their southern territories. The Emperor immediately ordered forts to be built in Volgograd and the province left to it. Another 90.000 cavalry was arriving, and they needed to be placed somewhere.

The new neighbor was Lithuania, and there wasn’t much consideration about whether it should be attacked. War was declared in 1442. It went on as usual. The Lithuanians did not invite their allies the Poles, which was unfortunate, but nevertheless the Chinese fought on. A 40.000 cavalry enemy army gathered in Bogutjar, only to be annihilated by 70.000 mad Chinese on horses. That battle broke the spirit of the Lithuanians, and they’ve lost most of their country in the following two years. After two years, however, most of the Chinese died from starvation, and the 3 northern provinces could not be captured. Facing Unhappy peasants, Emperor Zhengtong sued for peace, asking for Ukraina and military access. The Lithuanians were glad to accept.

Years have passed, and another 90.000 Chinese gathered in Ukraina, and another 50.000 in Volgograd and that other province. Poland found itself under attack in 1449.

While everything was going according to plan, Emperor Zhengtong went on a picnic along the northern borders. This was quite stupid of him, as evil Mongols captured him and his younger evil brother, Jingtai, usurped his throne. While Jingtai was more interested in causing troubles and provoking rebellions throughout the Empire, the Chinese fought on in Poland. The Polish just couldn’t stand the waves of Chinese, and they surrendered a handful of provinces in 1455.

China now bordered Silezia. A messenger rushed into Jingtai’s room.
“Emperor Jingtai! Emperor Jingtai!”
“Yes, it’s me speaking. What is it?”
“It seems that Bavaria is no more! Their neighbors, the Austrians annexed them a few years earlier!”
“Well, does that mean there are no more Bavarians?”
“There are, your majesty, only under Austrian rule!”
“Then we shall attack Austria, no problem”

And there was no problem. Ukraine declared its independence from Sibir and decided to grant military access to the Chinese. This way transportation was made shorter, and soon the occupied Polish territories, along with Ukraina (the province), were filled with Chinese volunteers.

The young Jingtai lost his throne in the meantime, and Zhengtong came back to power. A few months later, he ordered an attack on Austria. The year was 1458.

The Austrians fought bravely. They kept sending their 2000-men armies to Silezia even after the rest of their country was under siege. They did not care that 30.000 men were besieging Silezia. They loved that province very much, and had a difficult time surrendering it in the Peace Treaty of 1460.

Bavaria was now under Chinese rule. Punishment troops were sent to Bavaria immediately, hoping to wipe out the need for foreign cuisine from its roots. But that is another story…

Images:.
Europe – www.icarusindie.com/juszuf7/kina/europe.jpg
Africa – www.icarusindie.com/juszuf7/kina/africa.jpg
The world - www.icarusindie.com/juszuf7/kina/world.jpg

heagarty · 10-11-2002, 01:45

New OscAAR Category: BEST ONE-POST AAR!

Peter Ebbesen · 10-11-2002, 04:01

Brilliant. A work of sheer demented genius. Conqueror of Bavaria, I salute you

nuffy · 10-11-2002, 07:09

Short, sweet, to the point and damn funny!

Syt · 10-11-2002, 07:12

I can say only so much on this:

juszuf7 · 11-11-2002, 16:10

* bows *

Thanx everyone! Now I'm tempted to write another AAR.

Oh, why not...

*******************************************
*********** THE GREATEST GAMBIT *************
*******************************************
** FRANCE vs. LUXEMBURG - WHO WILL SURVIVE? ***
*******************************************

I am France of course

A servant rushes in to the king of France's throne room.
"Your majesty, urgent news! The English have captured Paris!"
"No problem, I have a cunning plan. Send all our forces to Luxemburg!"
"Yes sir!"

Later that year...

"Luxemburg annexed, your majesty! Now how will it save us from the English?"
"Well didn't you find a Lost Wlak in Luxemburg?"
"Errr, no..."
"Darn!"

-------------- THE END -----------

Sam Vimes · 11-11-2002, 17:09

Just brilliant

It took you only 40 years to do what bavaria has been tryong for centuries. It's the end of leaderhosen...

*Stroph1* · 11-11-2002, 17:19

But did you capture the mad Ludwig?

If he escaped, you will have to go on, capturing the whole wolrd until you find him.....

Good job!

juszuf7 · 11-11-2002, 19:31

Um, I don't know who the mad Ludwig is. I just finished reading the 2nd book of the sea route (or 3rd? anyway it ended in 1700) so I'm another 100 pages behind of reading the whole story

But I guess it would not be hard to conquer the world since I was playing on normal/normal. The only problem was the 2100 ducats per stability points, and of course the fact that I did not invest in any technology, only in armies and stability

*Stroph1* · 11-11-2002, 21:40

The Ludwig was a figure in real history who led one of the small German states. He was as nutty as they come and built some of the most magnificent castles in the region. I always imagined that Heagarty's Gluttonic Knights must have been based in part on the mad king.

Just a silly tie in to factual history.....

09-11-2002, 20:48	#1
juszuf7 Serf Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Behind you! Posts: 826	China: The Empire Strikes Back (on Bavaria) Well this is just a game I played with China. By reading Heagarty's Gluttonic Knights, I suddenly got the feeling that I have to try and reverse the whole thing. The following is the short story about that The snow was fallin in its usual fashion when a servant ran up the Chinese imperial palace and interrupted emperor Yongle in his meditation. Yongle was a very evil man, and he needed all the psychic power he could get to deal with himself. Terrible tales were told of what happened when someone broke his practice. Yongle’s eyes would turn red. His fangs would jump out, and hair would grow on his back. Emperor Yongle would turn into a monster, and not even the Gods could help the poor man that dared to disturb him. “Emperor Yongle! Emperor Yongle! Terrible news from the other side of the world!” “Speak out, my dear servant” “A small nation called Bavaria has pledged to conquer the Middle Kingdom!” “Oh, my!” “What shall we do, Emperor Yongle?” It was quite clear what has to be done. The Chinese had to strike pre-emptively, before all would be lost. Emperor Yongle called his advisors, and asked them for their advice. “We don’t know where this Bavaria is, your highness. All we know is that it’s on the other side of the world” “Well how can we reach this terrible foe?”, asked Yongle. “There are two ways: we could reach them by sea, or we could march through enemy territory and fight them on land. Which one would you prefer?” “BOTH!”, said the Emperor, and his words are the Law. The Imperial explorer, Zheng Ho was sent to find a sea route to Bavaria, while the Chinese troops gathered at the Chagatai border. Emperor Yongle was leading them. “My men, you are defending your homeland, and let none of you forget about that! Now fight!” There was no real resistance to tell you the truth. The Chagatai Mongols were building a fort in one of the bordering provinces, but their work was interrupted when the province was captured. After that Yongle marched on, until he finally encountered resistance in Bogda Shan. The 2000 men enemy army was annihilated a few minutes after this encounter, and the Chagatai capital was put under siege. Later that year, the Chagatai surrendered all their possessions, except their capital. In the meantime, a meteor has dropped somewhere in China. This has upset the entire people so much, and especially the emperor, that he decided to move his capital to the north. He did not expect, however, that this would further upset the people. The people were so Unhappy, that the entire country destabilized and almost reached anarchy (-2 stab). That is why Yongle decided that he needs to set the people’s minds away from their troubles, so he declared war on Chagatai once more, even though a peace treaty was signed only two weeks earlier. And Yongle was right. After Chagatai was annexed in February, 1420, the people cheered and stability was recovered by the end of the year (to 0, that is). Time was running out for the Chinese. The Bavarians could arrive any moment now! The independence-war that Dai Viet declared at the beginning of 1420 was concluded by the end of the year, and Yongle allowed that state to go free. In the meantime, a Buddhist monk visited him in his new capital. “So, this is your new capital, huh Yongle?” “How dare you speak to me with that tone, monk?” “I am guided by Buddha, Yongle, and I fear nothing” “Well I am guided by Konfuce, monk, and your Buddha should be afraid. Very afraid.” After the monk was executed, punishment squads were sent to the two Buddhist provinces in an attempt to convert the people there. But Yongle did not bother with the issue any longer. He ordered that those who wouldn’t comply with the new order be sent to the new colony of Bogorodsk. After securing military access with Malacca, the explorer Zheng Ho reached the eastern shores of India. And he found out that there was nothing there, so he went back to Malacca and began exploring the western shores of Indochina. He discovered that too, and established contact with Orissa. Then he went back to India, and established contact and military access with Vijayanagar. After that he sailed further, and reached Oman and the Horn of Africa. The clock was ticking, and 1426 came. The Chinese troops crossed the Timurid border. As expected, there was no real resistance, and after a short two year war the Timurids lost all their territory. Yongle was not hungry on territory, however – all he wanted was to reach Bayern, so all he took was the northern provinces. Another year has passed, stability recovered and war was declared on the Uzbekhs. The Uzbekhs were even easier than the Timurids, though their territory was more fortified. Zheng Ho advanced further, in the meantime, and from the small island of Zanzibar he sent expeditions to discover the south of Africa. The climate on the south was favorable, and he sent the message to the emperor that settlers could be sent, to establish a support colony in Karroo. The message that he received was somewhat confusing. It seems that Emperor Yongle died in 1424, and some pretenders just used his name to confuse the world. Why, it was not clear. Probably to aide the Bavarians. Anyway, Zheng Ho’s brother, Zheng Tong grabbed the power for himself, and signed a peace treaty with the Uzbekhs, giving a lot of territory to the Chinese. The year was 1435, and the Chinese people desperately needed more war. Zhengtong could not provide them enough wars because the stability has not yet recovered. One of the Buddhist provinces was converted, in the meantime, while the other resisted. This angered Zhengtong, and he said that all Buddhists are going to be repressed and hated. Not surprisingly, the province revolted the same month he said this. He did not care. Neither did the people of that province, and they defected to some foreign power a couple of years later. The colony in Karroo was established, and Zheng Ho explored the seas even further. He reached an island he called Fernando Po, and called for colonists there again. In 1437 stability was finally recovered, and war was declared on Nogai. This country had the Golden Horde for an ally. “Excellent”, thought Zhengtong, as he was hatching schemes to defeat the Golden Horde too. Suddenly, a servant came and brought the news of the death of his brother. The explorer Zheng Ho secured military access with Benin, and was very close to reach Bavaria, when he was attacked by sea monsters and died. It was very sad, but the emperor had to go on. The Bavarians could attack any time! In 1438, Nogai surrendered all its territory except their capital. The Emperor was so happy he wanted to do something good for his people, so he choose to Internally perfect China. Everyone was very happy, and despite sky high stability, the stability rose even further (I had +3 stability and I’ve got 6 more ). It was good that they were so happy, because this way they didn’t notice the amount of their sons that died in Golden Horde. The winters there were quite harsh, and the Chinese tactics to send waves after waves of cavalry did not help those starving and freezing to death. Another blow came when Astrakhan declared its independence while being besieged by the Chinese. They said their country was not at war, so even after the fort was captured it had to be handed over to the Astrakhani. Too bad! In April, 1440, the Golden Horde accepted a peace deal in which they ceded all their southern territories. The Emperor immediately ordered forts to be built in Volgograd and the province left to it. Another 90.000 cavalry was arriving, and they needed to be placed somewhere. The new neighbor was Lithuania, and there wasn’t much consideration about whether it should be attacked. War was declared in 1442. It went on as usual. The Lithuanians did not invite their allies the Poles, which was unfortunate, but nevertheless the Chinese fought on. A 40.000 cavalry enemy army gathered in Bogutjar, only to be annihilated by 70.000 mad Chinese on horses. That battle broke the spirit of the Lithuanians, and they’ve lost most of their country in the following two years. After two years, however, most of the Chinese died from starvation, and the 3 northern provinces could not be captured. Facing Unhappy peasants, Emperor Zhengtong sued for peace, asking for Ukraina and military access. The Lithuanians were glad to accept. Years have passed, and another 90.000 Chinese gathered in Ukraina, and another 50.000 in Volgograd and that other province. Poland found itself under attack in 1449. While everything was going according to plan, Emperor Zhengtong went on a picnic along the northern borders. This was quite stupid of him, as evil Mongols captured him and his younger evil brother, Jingtai, usurped his throne. While Jingtai was more interested in causing troubles and provoking rebellions throughout the Empire, the Chinese fought on in Poland. The Polish just couldn’t stand the waves of Chinese, and they surrendered a handful of provinces in 1455. China now bordered Silezia. A messenger rushed into Jingtai’s room. “Emperor Jingtai! Emperor Jingtai!” “Yes, it’s me speaking. What is it?” “It seems that Bavaria is no more! Their neighbors, the Austrians annexed them a few years earlier!” “Well, does that mean there are no more Bavarians?” “There are, your majesty, only under Austrian rule!” “Then we shall attack Austria, no problem” And there was no problem. Ukraine declared its independence from Sibir and decided to grant military access to the Chinese. This way transportation was made shorter, and soon the occupied Polish territories, along with Ukraina (the province), were filled with Chinese volunteers. The young Jingtai lost his throne in the meantime, and Zhengtong came back to power. A few months later, he ordered an attack on Austria. The year was 1458. The Austrians fought bravely. They kept sending their 2000-men armies to Silezia even after the rest of their country was under siege. They did not care that 30.000 men were besieging Silezia. They loved that province very much, and had a difficult time surrendering it in the Peace Treaty of 1460. Bavaria was now under Chinese rule. Punishment troops were sent to Bavaria immediately, hoping to wipe out the need for foreign cuisine from its roots. But that is another story… Images:. Europe – www.icarusindie.com/juszuf7/kina/europe.jpg Africa – www.icarusindie.com/juszuf7/kina/africa.jpg The world - www.icarusindie.com/juszuf7/kina/world.jpg __________________ Walt Disney had wooden teeth. The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets. The Sanskrit word for war translates as 'wanting more cows.' For more interesting facts visit the Random facts site

10-11-2002, 01:45	#2
heagarty Who? Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: on location Posts: 2,162	New OscAAR Category: BEST ONE-POST AAR! __________________ "Brevity is....wit" The only AAR I still take credit for: Can Morbidly Obese Bavarians Conquer China? Tales of the Gluttonic Knights! (OscAAR Winner!) Maps My musical link-try it.

10-11-2002, 04:01	#3
Peter Ebbesen the Conqueror Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Beyond the infinite Posts: 12,607	Brilliant. A work of sheer demented genius. Conqueror of Bavaria, I salute you __________________ When I said: "Death Before Dishonour!", I meant it alphabetically. ----- For new denizens of the forum: To post here you have already agreed to follow the user agreement and the general rules (pay specific attention to rules 2, 3, and 6 if writing while your temper is heated). Furthermore, there may be special rules for specific forums. These can usually be found in sticky posts at the top of a forum. Read the stickies and obey the rules and, overall, it is a much nicer forum for all of us. Disobey the rules and be moderated, warned, put on probation, or banned.

10-11-2002, 07:12	#5
Syt Lewwer duad üs slaav! Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Vienna, Austria. Posts: 6,550	I can say only so much on this: __________________ Many people think of changing the world, but few think of changing themselves. Leo Tolstoy

11-11-2002, 16:10	#6
juszuf7 Serf Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Behind you! Posts: 826	* bows * Thanx everyone! Now I'm tempted to write another AAR. Oh, why not... ***************************************** ******* THE GREATEST GAMBIT ********* *************************************** FRANCE vs. LUXEMBURG - WHO WILL SURVIVE? * ***************************************** I am France of course A servant rushes in to the king of France's throne room. "Your majesty, urgent news! The English have captured Paris!" "No problem, I have a cunning plan. Send all our forces to Luxemburg!" "Yes sir!" Later that year... "Luxemburg annexed, your majesty! Now how will it save us from the English?" "Well didn't you find a Lost Wlak in Luxemburg?" "Errr, no..." "Darn!" -------------- THE END ----------- __________________ Walt Disney had wooden teeth. The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets. The Sanskrit word for war translates as 'wanting more cows.' For more interesting facts visit the Random facts site

10-11-2002, 07:09	#4
nuffy Second Lieutenant Join Date: Oct 2001 Posts: 173	Short, sweet, to the point and damn funny!

11-11-2002, 17:09	#7
Sam Vimes Déserteur Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Tarragona, España Posts: 7,135	Just brilliant It took you only 40 years to do what bavaria has been tryong for centuries. It's the end of leaderhosen... __________________ Chi va piano, va sano. Chi va sano, va lontano. La version Paradoxienne: Chi va piano, va sano. Chi va sano, va boultano.

11-11-2002, 17:19	#8
Stroph1 CatAARstroph1c moderator Moderator Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Pennsylvania, USA Posts: 3,530	But did you capture the mad Ludwig? If he escaped, you will have to go on, capturing the whole wolrd until you find him..... Good job! __________________ More spam, you die! Horribly, horribly!

11-11-2002, 19:31	#9
juszuf7 Serf Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Behind you! Posts: 826	Um, I don't know who the mad Ludwig is. I just finished reading the 2nd book of the sea route (or 3rd? anyway it ended in 1700) so I'm another 100 pages behind of reading the whole story But I guess it would not be hard to conquer the world since I was playing on normal/normal. The only problem was the 2100 ducats per stability points, and of course the fact that I did not invest in any technology, only in armies and stability __________________ Walt Disney had wooden teeth. The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets. The Sanskrit word for war translates as 'wanting more cows.' For more interesting facts visit the Random facts site

11-11-2002, 21:40	#10
Stroph1 CatAARstroph1c moderator Moderator Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Pennsylvania, USA Posts: 3,530	The Ludwig was a figure in real history who led one of the small German states. He was as nutty as they come and built some of the most magnificent castles in the region. I always imagined that Heagarty's Gluttonic Knights must have been based in part on the mad king. Just a silly tie in to factual history..... __________________ More spam, you die! Horribly, horribly!