The Golden Harp
Playing: Duchy of Leinster
Starting Scenario: 1066
Difficulty: Normal
Aggression: Coward
Playing With: Crusader Kings + Deus Vult + 2.1 beta patch + DVIP + Addons
I imagine a lot of people play Crusader Kings as one of the larger kingdoms in areas where expansion is easy. For example, the King of Denmark can expand southward and eastward into pagan lands, while Robert Guiscard, Duke of Apulia, can create the Kingdom of Sicily without much trouble and has no shortage of Muslims to wage war on. Most strategy games are played this way, but CK allows you to set a relatively less ambitious goal – to unify a bunch of smaller realms into a minor regional power, or to just survive in an ocean of hostility. (See "Suenik the Beleaguered" for a well-played and hilarious case of the latter.)
This will be the former. This AAR will track my progress as I attempt to create a united Ireland. I will be starting out as the Duchy of Leinster, which is the largest of the Irish dukedoms. This does not mean I will have an easy time of it, though. My neighbors will not simply turn their titles over to me, and on top of their alliances with foreign nations, I will have to keep an eye on internal concerns as well.
Still, a lot of time can pass where, admittedly, nothing much happens. But AARs are about storytelling, so I will be adding flavor with bits of history, both based on fact and the fictional, alternate history the game creates. These parts will be written in green text. Conversely, if you only want to follow the AAR as a game as its played, I will write my own thoughts, reactions and plans in gold text. By the way, guess what the two colors of the Leinster flag/coat-of-arms are?
So, sit down and relax, and hopefully with the luck of the Irish I'll avoid the Paradox curse!
The field, which was so verdant in summertime, lay under a heavy snow, and even through heavy furs one could feel the bite of the winter chill. Looking out at the landscape from one of the windows of his castle, Diarmait mac Máele-na-mbó could see nothing but pure whiteness, could hear nothing but the crackling embers in the fire burning in the hearth beside him. The sheer nothingness allowed him to think deeply, to muddle over the state of his kingdom without distraction.
In his mind's eye, Diarmait could visualize all the territory under his control. From his capital here in Ferns, his influence extended throughout the prosperous southeastern quarter of Ireland. His own domain was the province of Laigin. Through a series of conquests and connections, the lords of Osraige, Dublin and the Isle of Man knelt their knee to him. All around him, however, were erstwhile allies and long-time enemies. Munster, Connacht, Mide, and the various dynasties in the north… They were all potential threats to what Diarmait had built up for him and his kin. He would have to be careful, lest it all collapse before his eyes.
So this is our starting location. As you can see, the Duke of Leinster (green) only controls one province right now; the others belong to his three vassals. The Duke of Munster (blue) only has one vassal but has two provinces under his direct control. The Duke of Connacht (dark brown) has one vassal and one demesne. Mide (brown) is sandwiched in central Ireland, while from left to right Sligo (dark yellow), Tir Connail (khaki), Tir Eoghain (gray) and Ulaid (beige) are independent counties. Basically, we want to expand quick, preferably gobbling up the counties so we can get a leg up on those other dukedoms.
Reflecting on his accomplishments, Diarmait could not help but remember his own humble beginnings. His father had been known as "The Cattle Rustler" and for most of his career he had been a typical Irish prince. He had finally earned distinction when he provided shelter to a pair of Anglo-Saxon nobles named Harold and Leofwine Godwinson. At the beginning of the year, Harold had been crowned King of England – only to be killed in battle during the Norman invasion eight months later. Still, in the brief period where Harold ruled, Diarmait had had a powerful friend. These days, however, as he entered his twilight years, he enjoyed the company of the fairer sex – and all the pleasure they brought with them.
Despite historically being something of an above average Irish lord, Diarmait in the game isn't all that great on his own. Still, he's far from terrible, and of all the traits to have, Lustful is a pretty good one! It means he likes to get it on, and usually the more kids you have, the less likely your bloodline will run out – which means "game over" in CK.
His mind on reproduction, Diarmait turned his thoughts to his two sons. His eldest, Murchad, ruled Dublin. It had been an important Viking settlement before Diarmait captured it fifteen years ago, a serendipitous adventure that had begun as a raiding jaunt but transformed into a major coup when the town's owner fled without provocation. Dublin came both with great commerce – and a great navy. Murchad was well-trusted with these useful commodities, as he was neither devious nor ambitious. On the contrary, he was an honest, plain-spoken man who shared his father's appetite for women but, even in this vice, was not indulgent. But although his inoffensive, modest nature made him dependable and likable, Murchad would likely lack the toughness sometimes needed from a leader… Fortunately, he had his brother Enna to rely on. Enna was, in a word, a warrior and little else. He was the grand commander of the armed forces under Diarmat's control. Unfortunately, these forces amounted to a handful of knights and a few hundred lightly armed peasants. Leinster depended on the troops of its vassals in anything larger than a minor skirmish.
So let's check out the heirs Diarmait already has. Murchad is the Count of Dublin and one of our vassals, so we can depend on him to be pretty loyal… Plus, that title is increasing his prestige, so he's not just some nobody no one has ever heard of when he assumes power. Also, as another bonus, he's Lustful, so hopefully we'll have even more children carrying on the family name! Enna is the Marshal in our court, having a respectable Martial skill. Murchad has a higher one, though, which is important, because due to the "law of the land", the son who is considered "the strongest" is the primary heir.
Diarmait had chosen other family members for the rest of his court as well. His wife served as his Chancellor, who oversaw the administration of the state as well as external affairs; his cousin Amalgein tended to the coffers, ensuring that funds were appropriated to the appropriate places; and Loigsech, his nephew, saw to the security of realm, keeping track of seditious elements in the court and gathering information on enemies foreign and domestic. Sadly, there was no man of great piety to serve as bishop. Financially speaking, Leinster was barely breaking even. In terms of technology, knowledge did not extend far past swords and walls. These were simple and brutal times, and most of Ireland was the same way.
So this is Leinster's starting court, with all the positions filled by people from the royal family. We're going to let some time pass and let our court be filled by randomly generated personalities, but none of them are going to have terrific stats. We'll deal with that in a bit. In terms of economics, I set my taxes so the loyalty of all classes (peasants, merchants, clergy and nobles) drains to around 75%. We're kind of poor right now, though, so raising taxes doesn't net us much right away. We're going to be making a profit of around 3 every month at the moment. As you can see, I've set the Advances to technologies I think will be most useful. We don't know much, but neither does the rest of Ireland! I should also mention infrastructure-wise, we're starting from scratch… All we have is a little fort and that's it.
I didn't take a screenshot of the Laws screen, but as I stated earlier, the strongest son inherits. This means that the son with the most titles inherits, with the tiebreaker being the son with the highest Martial skill (or at least I believe that's how it works). Traditional Custom is also in place and there is Ecclesial Balance, meaning that the power of both the secular lords and the clergy are more or less on the same level.
Perhaps things would improve in the coming year. Perhaps, before his end would come, Diarmait would bring more glory and wealth to his people. He was getting on in years, yes, but his spirit was strong. As he turned away from the window, he clenched his fist and made a vow to himself. He would not rest, never retire, not until he had become High King of Ireland…
Suddenly, he coughed. He put a hand to his chest, shocked by how intense it was. Then he coughed again. And again. It was several moments before he recovered from the fit. He looked to the window and the harsh conditions outside. Perhaps he had stayed by the window too long…
This is bad news. If you were sick in medieval times, you were on death's door. Plus, Diarmait is no spring chicken, so things look pretty bleak. And we just started the game! Come on, man! Let's cross our fingers and hope this isn't the end for our fearless leader…
The envoy had shown all due supplication upon his arrival at the castle in Ferns. "I bring greetings from Conchobar Ua Máelshechnaill, King of Mide," he announced. "He would form an alliance with Leinster, with the hope that we would stand together in the face of mutual foes. While our two lands are formidable on their own, together the might of our armies would be insurmountable."
Diarmait had taught himself long ago how to laugh on the inside, his features unchanged. He would have done so now, had he not felt so miserable. His head ached, his body felt cold and… this accursed cough! It was not a chuckle but a whimper he suppressed as he addressed the envoy. "Very well. Inform your lord that the Kingdom of Leinster and the Kingdom of Mide are allied. If crisis should come to either of us, one should not hesitate to call on the other for aid."
The envoy grinned from ear to ear. Diarmait knew why. Situated as it was between the much larger kingdoms, Mide was vulnerable. It was only a matter of time before Leinster, Munster or Connacht stole its sovereignty. This would have most definitely happened if it were on its own; allied with Leinster, however, it stood a chance of survival. The lion was protecting the mouse so the mouse could be eaten later, at the lion's choosing. At the moment, Diarmait felt no urge to lead an army… He just wanted to get well!
Is your face buried in your palm? We should be making a claim on Mide, not allying with it! Well, right now we can't make a claim because we don't have enough prestige to cook one up. Also, we want to build up our money and our forces before we jump into a war. Plus, going into battle with a sick Duke would probably not be wise…
Spring was traditionally the wedding season, but a flurry of matrimony had taken place in February. Enna, strangely a bachelor at his age, had been married as quickly as possible to a fiscally-minded young woman named Eua, one of the Norse-Gaels from the western coast of Scotland. After that, a charismatic young woman from the Isle of Man was betrothed to one of Diarmait's courtiers. Finally, a sly and stealthy lass from the south – Tuadmumu, to be precise – was pledged to eternal bliss with yet another one of Diarmait's kin. Of all the bachelors in Diarmait's family, all had been married off save for young Loigsech… There was no need; at least, not for the time being. Diarmait had both selected a coterie of brilliant and beautiful damsels, satisfying his tastes in intelligence and comeliness in one swoop.
It's good to have young and Lustful women for your heirs. However, we'll take the risk and assume that Marshal Enna won't displace his older brother in the succession order. The other two, who aren't currently in the running at all, are also married to Gaelic gals whose primary attractiveness is that they are really good at one specific thing. Now, we'd like to have had at least one of these guys marry the daughter of a Gaelic title-holder, but there aren't any – at least not in and around Ireland.
"Naw, naw food," Diarmait said softly, pushing the dish away. He was laid up in bed again, his head pounding, flush with fever, his stomach nauseous. Despite praying for recovery day and night, he had not felt one iota better since he had become ill; if anything, he was worse. He had, after much pressure from his wife, tried to eat some cooked meat, but had been unable to keep it down. On top of his vomiting, he was also coughing up soft little yellow pieces. He had begun to think that maybe he had been poisoned. Who had it been? Who was it? His mind raced, which only made the fever more intense. What in God's name was wrong with him?
Uh-oh…
Diarmait pressed his clammy hands together and closed his eyes. "Holy Father, if I have fallen from your grace… if no doctor may give me relief… If I am buried 'neath the sod… If your angels will not receive me…" He swallowed hard and tried to make some heat by rubbing his hands together. He was so cold, so cold… Except for his head, which was as hot as a searing fire! He reached for the bowl of water beside his bed and caught his reflection. Beneath the wrinkles, beneath the blue flesh, there was a prince…
"Diarmait… Diarmait mac Máele-na-mbó…"
Diarmait raised his head. "Who calls to me with such familiarity? Murchad? Enna?" His eyebrows narrowed, drilling together. "Or is it an assassin? Who's there? Reveal yourself!"
"'Tis me," the voice said coolly. "Ruaidrí mac Taidc. Your auld rival." The tone turned curious. "Have you forgotten me, Diarmait? You son of a cattle thief! You wee nothing!" A laugh broke out, deep from the belly, and it sent a shiver down Diarmait's spine.
"It cannot be," he whispered. "I killed you! I tore out your eyes!" He began swinging at the air, pushing himself against the wall. It was to no avail. The same deep, haunting laugh filled his ears. He tried to scream, but no sound came from his throat. He closed his eyes shut hard… so hard that he saw a bright light flash before him…
The next morning, Diarmait was found dead in his bed, done in by his poor health.
Well, that stinks!
It's getting late… Next time, we begin the adventures of our new Duke, who takes the reigns less than five months into the game!
Please let me know what you think! What do you like? What don't you like? What would you like to see in the future? Just keep things on-topic and respectful! Thanks!
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