• We have updated our Community Code of Conduct. Please read through the new rules for the forum that are an integral part of Paradox Interactive’s User Agreement.

Snake IV

Avatarless for the 3000 club
46 Badges
Sep 24, 2005
4.063
2
  • Crusader Kings II: Reapers Due
  • 500k Club
  • Cities: Skylines
  • Europa Universalis III: Collection
  • Europa Universalis IV: El Dorado
  • Europa Universalis: Rome Collectors Edition
  • Crusader Kings II: Way of Life
  • Europa Universalis IV: Common Sense
  • Crusader Kings II: Horse Lords
  • Europa Universalis IV: Cossacks
  • Crusader Kings II: Conclave
  • Europa Universalis IV: Mare Nostrum
  • Victoria 2
  • Europa Universalis IV: Rights of Man
  • Crusader Kings II: Monks and Mystics
  • Europa Universalis IV: Mandate of Heaven
  • Europa Universalis IV: Third Rome
  • Europa Universalis IV: Cradle of Civilization
  • Crusader Kings II: Jade Dragon
  • Crusader Kings II: Holy Fury
  • Europa Universalis IV: Golden Century
  • Imperator: Rome Deluxe Edition
  • Imperator: Rome
  • Divine Wind
  • Crusader Kings II
  • Crusader Kings II: Charlemagne
  • Crusader Kings II: Legacy of Rome
  • Crusader Kings II: The Old Gods
  • Crusader Kings II: Rajas of India
  • Crusader Kings II: The Republic
  • Crusader Kings II: Sons of Abraham
  • Crusader Kings II: Sunset Invasion
  • Crusader Kings II: Sword of Islam
  • Diplomacy
  • Europa Universalis III
  • Cities in Motion 2
  • Europa Universalis IV
  • Europa Universalis IV: Art of War
  • Europa Universalis IV: Conquest of Paradise
  • Europa Universalis IV: Wealth of Nations
  • Europa Universalis IV: Call to arms event
  • For the Motherland
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Europa Universalis IV: Res Publica
  • Victoria: Revolutions
  • Europa Universalis: Rome
Any competion here is no more. Use this thread for any kind of otherwise unrelated AAR songs.

"Hi and welcome to Paradoxian Idol, the first AAR to be shamelessly ripped off the TV.

Also visit our CK filial
And our EUIII filial


Here you, be you a writer, lurker, moderator, reader, serpent wannabee, or God of Thunder and rock 'n roll, will be the one standing for the actual making of the AAR. You are the innovative soul we are looking for, who we in the jury then can comment on in a snobby superior way (or in a kind and constructive way, whatever is fine for you.) The core here is songs; songs with neat lyrics. You will get the change to produce neat lyrics (own songs too if you're able) and present them here. The best of you will then move on to the next level of competition, were you fight each other in a cascade of song and dance.

This kind of writing is called a "Musical AAR" and has been produced in AARland in non-collective forms before. The only form I have so far observed is remade lyrics to one somewhat well known song. Among these the triplets AARs produced by EvilSanta stand for the biggest chunk, at least by one author. EvilSanta has also written a guide how to write an AAR like this, which you can read if you feel inexperienced in the field. Below will an example of a musical AAR be shown, including some practical notes.

Now, let's get down to business. The following guidelines should be good to have read.

1. Anyone can contribute to the AAR.
2. A contribution doesn't have to be in the competition. No jury contributions will. If someone else wish to just write state that you do not wish to compete. After all, the main thing is to have fun.
3. The contribution must contain a musical element in some way least modified by the author.
4. There must be a link to the tune corresponding to the text to qualify.
5. One competing contribution per member and level of competition. Non-competing contributions are unlimited. Unless stated otherwise in beforehand the first contribution will be the competing one.
6.To keep a good pace please try to keep the contributions under four per day. It's not a hard rule, but a recommendation.
7. The contribution should not be out of place in the HoI forum. There are threads for the other forums coming up.

The levels of contribution will be adjusted according to the number of contributions. The final level is planned to be the the general forum

And for those who's interested: here is a short presentation of the jury, with some tasteless commercials for their other works.

Snake IV(me), who's idea this AAR happens to be. Has done a couple of AARs before, of which "The seven wonders of the Diplomatic world" is most known being the only Diplomacy AAR of some length. Until recently Snake IV regrettably hadn't done much in AAR lately besides reading already subscribed works. Snake has one AAR he is currently working on. “World war II in colour, boring bulge“ was started not at all long ago, where he whines as Bhutan.

grayghost, a big shot in the HoI II sub-forum. He has one AAR through the times, one but a tiger. The Manchurian Candidate is among the top of the Narrative AARs ongoing, and has been several times awAARded for its quality, among that the Favourite HoI overall and Favourite HoI Narrative AAR for Q2 2007. grayghost is also the founder of the warlords club, which includes such people as Le Ran and rcduggan.



EvilSanta, the master of musical AARs. As mentioned is EvilSanta’s greatest success the three AARs were everything is told through lyrics and lyrics only, in the CK, EUIII, and HoI II forums, for which he has won both WritAAR of the week and Weekly AAR showcase. Currently he works on “Ein Bergvolk, Ein Österreich, Ein Schuschnigg!” were he plays the smaller German version of a Reich (Austria), with easy-going and fun humour with one of his eminent songs once in a while.



Duke of Wellington, creator of many entertaining AARs, among them the two years old and counting “Golden Horde - Scourge From The East”, which is the longest EUII AAR since five years in posts counted. Duke has also made several other AARs about hopeless or very tiny nations in EUII or EUIII, all with a cleaver style of writing with an entertaining view on organized societies. Duke of Wellington is also one of the forums biggest readers, giving positive feedback in AARs of every style and quality all over the forum.






And now, let the singing begin! Remember that the important isn’t to win, but to contribute, entertain and be entertained."
 
Last edited:
This is no contribution.



The speech song
By Snake IV





The trumpets resounded, the soldiers marched, the people raised their hands in the air, and the birds soiled his clothes when the Führer stepped up at the podium at the Nürnberger conference.



Der Führer: Thank you everyone. Remember now to stretch. There is a day tomorrow too and you don't want to have your hailing arm arching. I will now present for you the general opinion the government has for our foreign policy the coming 10-20 years. If you will maestro.



Sing to the tune of O, Tannenbaum (also known as O Christmas tree, O Whacking Day, Mon beau sapin, or En busschaufför)


O Lebensraum, O Lebensraum,
I wish you soon to conquer
We need you for the German kind
Our mean intentions blow the mind
O Lebensraum, O Lebensraum,
I wish you soon to conquer

O Lebensraum, O Lebensraum,
You look so big and lovely.
Corrupted powers now you oppress.
Which are as sane as Rudolf Hess
O Lebensraum, O Lebensraum,
You look so big and lovely.

O Lebensraum, O Lebensraum,
We need you now so badly.
Our lack of space is to regret
There sleeps young men in my closet
O Lebensraum, O Lebensraum,
We need you now so badly.




Notes on the example song: Here I made a song conntecting to Nazi Germany. I begun with getting an idea for the most know part of the tune, and make the lyrics from there. To make it easy for people to follow I picked a tune I presumed most know. It is always eaiser to follow if you know the music in question. Though not nessesary I have put rhymes at the places there were rhymes in the original, and no rhyme were there weren't. I have included a short pre-song part to set the mode, and to direct people on what's going on. The tune is included with a link (this is compulsury), to which the lyrics fit. A tips is too include one with song and one without, as the one with can help people who don't know there the text should be, while the oen without can be used by people who know and doens't want to be disturbed by the original lyrics. I found no link to any musical only version in three verses, so I settled on sung lyrics only. I lack a finish line outside the song, but such a thing can be a fitting last comment. I also made a headline, and a note that this is no contribution.

PS. Not to forget. A pleasent addition could be a picture, making it more pleasent to read.
 
Use time on your Bhutanese AAR, goddamnit!!! :mad:

An idea came to mind immediately, and I think I'll go ahead with it! I will post it when the lyrics are ready, OK?
 
Here is my contribution. Moderate your response, but don't cuddle with me.

Kampf Musik
by Mangudai

The world leaders of the year 1941 are gathered in the gritty slums of Berlin city, cheering. A voice interrupts them: "We have a problem! If you can count." It was general John J. Pershing, standing in full uniform on top of a car. He spoke with great confidence and authority.
"We got conservatives... standing right next to social liberal icons. We got PA stars... standing right here next to Stalinism. Nobody is wasting nobody!"

*Cheering*

"But then look what we have here: The Axis. "The Pact of Steel". Led by some Austrian... named Adolf Hitler. They are singlehandedly... destroying the world community!" Hitler and his crew are in disbelief and tails.
Angry shouts erupt from the crowd, while Pershing keeps going: "Can you dig it? Can you dig it? Can you... dig iiiiit?"

Rap to the beat of Fight Music by D12

(Chorus, by Adolf Hitler)
This kind of Musik, use it, and you get amped to hate shit
Whenever you hear some shit and you can't be pacifist
It's just some shit, for these haters, to trash their regions with
Just declare whenever they obliged to do shit
The type of shit that you don't have to ask who ranted it
You just know, that's the new shit
The type of shit that causes mass suggestion
and fanatical bullshit of people acting Jingoist

(Benito Mussolini)
I come to where I not belong with intention do wage war
Some brutal Roman ambition? Hell, that can't possibly bore
Il Duce's destiny's to become big bad motherf*cking Emperor
Fascist prick that'll gladly rape some wild boars
Iron will Ben, Musso with crap arms
Getting ass-whopped everywhere screaming, "commies, come get some!"
Journalist that loves to hate, with hate joining too late
For Hitler to not detonate, Britain sees me and invades
It should be drastic, but my black shirts are way too dope
Bustaz never gonna hang me with a meat hook or rope
Push your democracy and Geneva protocol into the line of fire, till I got a quagmire
I f*ck up deep the moment I with Adolf dastardly conspire
This is Kampf Musik!

(Ion Antonescu)
Yo, do you like referendums? (No)
Neither do I, I rather drink bitter blood of commie scum (Oh)
F*ck peasants up for revolts and crap (bitches)
So what if they're poor saps, they think mighty Antonescu is just an act!
I f*cking hate you, I'll send unarmed troops into the Russian winter to try and bitch-slap you
While the Wehrmacht try not to laugh at us while fighting you (hell yeah)
Iron Guard done got me on this song
eating a baclava, disgracing God's son, while I'm on the john
Tired of the red hellspawns
Take it back Stalin, you know where it belongs (hellspawn sp-spawn spawn)
Now here's a legion, I'll put it on the East Front
Now go over there and shoot down the Devil's ones
F*ck your October songs!

(Chorus, by Adolf Hitler)

(Miklós Horthy de Nagybánya)
Just bring your deep operations on, weak commies won't stand for none
I'm the crusher of Béla Kun, wanna see Hungarian guns in Wash-ington?
Show you armored funk
40 MP40s and one Panzerfaust (click-clack)
To my people I lie, I'll poke you in the eye
Have you smothered with a ton of stinkin' German Edelweiss
We go for lands, only real fascists understand
But f*ck it it's all good, the Tripartite is rioting on
It's Kampf Musik!

(Hideki Tojo)
I'm a Jap that loves European fascists
And won't hesitate to crusade with them against the democratic Abyss
I'm like that, hunting down the Chinese like wolfpacks
Goin' out with a surprise attack right in front of FDR, saying "You hear that!?"
I'll opt for a DoW, charge you with a Shõwa credo
If you send your marines and fleet, It'll be beyond bloody (sweet)
Japan needs to conquer through war, or it'll be lacking
Bring forth the Co-Asian Prosperity Sphere and give the Allies some skull cracking
It's Kampf Musik!

(Jozef Tiso)
This ass-kissing I'm perping isn't hurting
See all these anti-nazi crooks? When I step into the Axis they're toast, sure thing
If any country is in the way, they'll see some blitzkrieging
Carpet bombing them and SD'ing'em at Heydrich's whim
Form an armored spearhead, and roll it at'em or spit it at'em
Hold up a copy of his constitution and goose-stepping it at him
Wage total war while you right hooking, censor while we're weapons' cooking
F*ck Kampf Musik, this is becoming German slave Musik!

(Adolf Hitler)
If I could capture the Aryan rage and bottle it
Crush the glass with my SS and swallow it
Then spit it back in the faces of you Versailles treatists
and communists who think Germany's shit but don't say shit
You amràtsish, hintish*, and you anti-nazi's
watch me, cuz you thinking you got me in this hot seat
You motherf*ckers wanna judge me cuz you're not me
You'll never stop me, I'm top speed as you pop me
I was sent by providence to save the German nation
from the stinking breath of Weimar degeneration
to grow to praise me, I'm making'em go crazy
That's how I got this whole nation to embrace me
I'm a Nazi till the day I get spit on
I'll cripple any creaking two-bit nation I'm sic'd on
And this song is for our new world order to be brought on
A sick song to steal Lebensraum to, and it's called...

(Chorus, by Adolf Hitler)

It's Kampf Musik!

hit-muss.jpg

Comrades in arms, not scared to piss the world off

*The Jiddisch words for ignorant and canine :D
 
Last edited:
Right, time to enter the jury mode and give a brief judgement.


First of all I must mention that your usage of rap music makes it very difficult to follow the lyrics along the tune. Couple first verses are still doable but Antonescu's part made me fall from the wagon, so to speak. The tune is very generic and sounds the same throughout the song, so it's not easy to catch up, either. All in all, very poor choice of music. It might work for people able to do rap but your average Joe will struggle to follow the lyrics.


The idea behind this song is a good one, I give you that. Gangsta rap and it's extravagant self-righteous boasting in itself is a hilarious concept that carries great to WW2. Your lyrics are aggressive and thus fit your gangsta trashtalking theme. They also stay true to the WW2-theme, a thing we require from contesting works here in HoILand. Your lyrics are clear in their message and there is also a bit of a story in there, with John J. Pershing's speech and the fascist response to it. Lyric-wise, this song was succesful, I'll say. Plentiful usage of WW2 terms like "panzerfaust", "Wehrmacht" and "Co-Asian Prosperity Sphere" is a definite bonus. You know your history and are able to make it known through your lyrics.


So comes the time of final judgement. Your music choice really drops your points in my eyes but good lyrics and idea fix that somewhat. You definitely put up a lot effort into that one but still, only slightly, I need to lean towards a negative answer. Excellent idea and great lyrics but all of this ruined because, atleast in my opinion, it is too hard to follow words and thus I can't get the all enjoyment that the lyrics have to offer. Afterall, half of the magic these musical bits offer IS the fact that you can sing along to them and that magic is lost if words don't fit the tune.

I urge you to give another shot in the upcoming regional qualifications in Vicky, CK or EUIII areas with more appropriate music. The lyrics are there and with proper tune to back you up, there's no stopping you.

Mangudai, sadly I must let you go. It was a difficult choice for me but all-lyrics does not do it for me, I require a tune to keep them company.
 
I'll judge it later on, when we have got things rolling, but I have to say it was quite short notice you managed to get something up Mangudai, and it wasn't a few worded lyric. Cudos to that.

EDIT:
EvilSanta said:
I urge you to give another shot in the upcoming regional qualifications in Vicky, CK or EUIII areas with more appropriate music. The lyrics are there and with proper tune to back you up, there's no stopping you.
We havn't discussed that, but I'd say it's fine. Though, you don't have to draw the picture that Mangudai is out before we others have had a change to express ourself ;)
 
Last edited:
Cudos for not having a life? :rofl:

I didn't think it was hard to follow, but EvilSanta is judge.
 
this is a very original idea, and funny. unfortunately I'm not good at this type of thing, but so far the contributions have been great.
 
Mangudai said:
I didn't think it was hard to follow, but EvilSanta is judge.

I know what you are talking about. It definitely is easier to follow one's own works than those of others.

I don't listen to rap at all so I am not used to that kind of music. The generic, mind-numbing beat and very fast pace does not help me at all. Also my non-nativeness when it comes to English is also a big, big factor. Had that been made in Finnish, I could have followed it quite a bit easier.

Also, since it was the first song and first judgement, I didn't really know how tough I should be. But afterall, we must drop the majority of contestants out in every regional qualification so the finals have some meaning.


Snake "the Boss" IV said:
We havn't discussed that, but I'd say it's fine. Though, you don't have to draw the picture that Mangudai is out before we others have had a change to express ourself

Yeah, I thought that since they can do it in real Idols (as far as my 15 minutes total of ever watching the show can tell) we could employ it here also. But you are the boss here and make these decisions.
 
Judge number 2 grayghost jumpin in here to give praise or a beatin for the recent contribution of one Mangudai who had the sack to jump and be the first in line.

And now (drum roll please)...my assessment of Kampf Musik!

I have to agree with Evil Santa, the choice of music made this one hard to follow. I speakum the englits fine, and I have listened to rap, but hell, even when you know the words, that stuff is hard to follow.

To be honest, I finally had to turn the music off and just read the lyrics.

The lyrics were fricken outstanding. Your grasp of history and hiphop pulled together a veritable cornicopia of historical info and slang. I felt that you were able to grasp the feel of each leader in your lyrics and make them come alive in a way that was just fricken of the hook.(cant believe I just used that line)

Now, perhaps if you were to actually perform this, I might be able to put it together with the music, but my limited brain cells (to much partying with my entorage) couldn't pull the two together.

Overall...A for effort, top notch lyrics...but in the end, the choice of musical accompanyment brought you down.
 
(Pending approval to change my mind, this will be an actual entry for the contest!)

Narrator: Tucked away in the Balkan region, nestled between the Mediterrenean Sea, Yugoslavia, and Greece, lies a tiny nation. A great nation, with beautiful landscape and brave men! A nation which...

Oh, who are we kidding, it's a pretty bad country to be. Surrounded by potential foes, no real chance of advancement, and doomed to fall to one or another of those foes. Heck, we're lucky if we can even train up a single undermanned militia unit!

However, on behalf of His Majesty, King Zog I, we present this informative song about our... not-so-great... land: (to the tune of America, The Beautiful )

albania.jpg


ALBANIA, THE PITIFUL

Oh pitiful, with few IC,
How can we build things here?
Our tech teams have almost no skill,
But at least we've got beer!

Albania! Albania!
Frustration knows no bounds.
And soon another flag will fly
Above your dark brown grounds!

Our Balkan land has some big rocks,
And not much more than that.
But our flag still looks pretty cool
And King Zog's got a hat!

Albania! Albania!
Frustration knows no bounds.
And soon another flag will fly
Above your dark brown grounds!

Oh pitiful, with no army,
Soon Italy attacks.
Our manpower is negative,
No one will watch our backs!

Albania! Albania!
Frustration knows no bounds.
And soon another flag will fly
Above your dark brown grounds!



zog1albania.jpg

Glorious King Zog: "Take my nation, please!"
 
Last edited:
Cascadia said:
(Not technically for the competition, but I'm submitting this anyway, just... because. Have a whack at critiquing it, if you like. Also, not so much about the history involved so much as gameplay.)

Narrator: Tucked away in the Balkan region, nestled between the Mediterrenean Sea, Yugoslavia, and Greece, lies a tiny nation. A great nation, with beautiful landscape and brave men! A nation which...

Oh, who are we kidding, it's a pretty bad country to be. Surrounded by potential foes, no real chance of advancement, and doomed to fall to one or another of those foes. Heck, we're lucky if we can even train up a single undermanned militia unit!

However, on behalf of His Majesty, King Zog I, we present this informative song about our... not-so-great... land: (to the tune of America, The Beautiful )

albania.jpg


ALBANIA, THE PITIFUL

Oh pitiful, with few IC,
How can we build things here?
Our tech teams have almost no skill,
But at least we've got beer!

Albania! Albania!
Frustration knows no bounds.
And soon another flag will fly
Above your dark brown grounds!

Our Balkan land has some big rocks,
And not much more than that.
But our flag still looks pretty cool
And King Zog's got a hat!

Albania! Albania!
Frustration knows no bounds.
And soon another flag will fly
Above your dark brown grounds!

Oh pitiful, with no army,
Soon Italy attacks.
Our manpower is negative,
No one will watch our backs!

Albania! Albania!
Frustration knows no bounds.
And soon another flag will fly
Above your dark brown grounds!



zog1albania.jpg

Glorious King Zog: "Take my nation, please!"

Hahaha, made me laugh.
 
Cascadia,

I am actually quite dissappointed that you chose not to enter this into the actual competitiion, and I actually hope you reconsider and rescind the "Not for competition" statement.

First, due to the music chosen, very, very easy to follow. I found your lyrics quite hysterical and easy to put to the music. Your grasp of Albania in relation to game terms is spot on and captures the futility of trying to play this country. An outstanding effort.

My only criticism is...that you did not submit it for competition! Mangudai gets extra points for not only submitting, but putting it out there to compete. I offer you one last chance (with boss man Snake IV's approval) that you submit this for the actual competition.
 
grayghost said:
Cascadia,

I am actually quite dissappointed that you chose not to enter this into the actual competitiion, and I actually hope you reconsider and rescind the "Not for competition" statement.

First, due to the music chosen, very, very easy to follow. I found your lyrics quite hysterical and easy to put to the music. Your grasp of Albania in relation to game terms is spot on and captures the futility of trying to play this country. An outstanding effort.

My only criticism is...that you did not submit it for competition! Mangudai gets extra points for not only submitting, but putting it out there to compete. I offer you one last chance (with boss man Snake IV's approval) that you submit this for the actual competition.

You really think it's that good? Weeelll... perhaps I could be persuaded to submit it for the competition after all. What the heck? So long as Snake IV approves that.
 
Cascadia, that was simply brilliant. Just brilliant. Lyrics are hilarious and fit the tune perfectly. Like grayghost said, spot on describtion of Albania.

Only negative point I can point out is the version of "America The Beautiful" you picked doesn't have the clearest vocals but I must admit that it does not prevent me from following the words the tiniest bit.

IN!
 
Arg. Don't do that! People should be able to contribute without the judges pushing them to do so when they does, don't you think. (which is anotehr thing than saying "I'd have voted yes had it been in")

And in my opinion you shouldn't be able to change the status of an already commented song. That'd make it possible to make lots of non-contributions and then change one when it do well. If everyone disagrees I'll not go against the stream, you can hav eyour own will ;)

That wouldn't mean you cannot contribute Cascadia, but I would say you would have to do so with something else.

Oh, and I will make some comments with a third entry. :)
 
Snake IV said:
Arg. Don't do that! People should be able to contribute without the judges pushing them to do so when they does, don't you think. (which is anotehr thing than saying "I'd have voted yes had it been in")

And in my opinion you shouldn't be able to change the status of an already commented song. That'd make it possible to make lots of non-contributions and then change one when it do well. If everyone disagrees I'll not go against the stream, you can hav eyour own will ;)

Okay.