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Raaritsgozilla

Lt. General
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Oct 5, 2007
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Well, i know what you are probably thinking... OoOOoooOOOO a British AAR, havent seen one of them before!!

I am well aware of that, but i thought, having never played Britain before (NEVER!!) I'd give it a lash and chronicle it for others to admire, and/or poke embarrassing fun at. The aims of this AAR are quite simple.

GAIN LAND FOR THE EMPIRE!

whether this is actual land that GB (great britain) once, or did, hold, or new land entirely is not of importance, but more the expansion of my grandmother's home. I realise, that once big bad Germany has been defeated, more often than not, the SU declares war on the allies... which should make this AAR interesting for me, as I have only battled the Soviets as Germany.

For anyone that has read my NZ AAR (see sig), our favourite Poms, Basil and Cecil shall make appearances, maybe in divisions ;) Also, appearances from our favourite surrender monkeys Henri and Claude, (who, I have read just today, may not have actually surrendered that easily... go figure) and the occasional different nationality, if i can figure out stereotypical names for them :D

And so. On we travel!

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This is Britain as at 1st Jan 1936. Not looking too hopeful if we wish to go against the big bad bear is it? Im none too pleased. (In Birmingham there is 2 Inf. and one HQ) 5 infantry divisions in the Isles? You gotta be kidding me.

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The situtation in India isnt that much better. It looks as though we MAY have enough divisions there to stop a Japanese rampage through the area once Nat china is gone... if it goes, and we must also protect against Siam at the same time. Oh well.

Onwards to ministers and diplomacy!!!

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Ooohhh arent you the pretty one minister!!

Yeah well, as everyone knows George V dies in rapid order and Edward VII comes in, and HE SUCKS! -10% IC my friggen ass! on top of that Baldwin takes off 5% so this is just a bloody joke. Bring on Churchill i say.

I have no problems with technology though. High skilled tech teams, quick to learn, alot researched, alll goooood.
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CAS and Int.s are the order of the day, as these will be needed to destroy enemy armies and protect in the air early on, respectively.
Also, whatever tinassed stupid Land techs we have are going in favour of the Blitzkrieg doctrines. These are where modern warfare is at!!

Production.

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Well that IC problem sucks, but it'll sort out with the gearing up for war events. Also the machine tools techs will help as well, so its going to be ok. Creation of Inf divisions is needed at the moment as they are vital for defence, but soon armoured divisions will flow out of our factories and take the fight to our enemies! Radar stations are good on the channel coast to detect escaping German ships, and also for air battles.

I realise I havent mentioned the navy. This, while inexcusable for a GB game, can be explained easily:
I havent looked at it at all yet.
I know the Royal Navy was a huge part of GB, but all other games have ahad small to no navies, so i havent worried before. Besides im not that much of a fan of navies anyway. Land and air is the place to be!
Finally: NZ is trying to convert England to be better at rugby and cricket, be more lenient to natives and... well... to do bugger all else really.
screensave9rg3.png

IM THE LEADER NOT THEM!!!
 
Raaritsgozilla said:
Finally: NZ is trying to convert England to be better at rugby.
Ahh, because only rubbish teams get to two world cup finals in a row. No the correct way is to choke every single time like a big bunch of girls. :D
 
Hey... i cant say they didnt choke. Theyre the chokiest chokers of all chokers. But theyre our chokers! haha. That... and England did well. Even though they were rubbish in the lead up, but they were good when it mattered. top job
 
Is it just me, or does King George V look like Tsar Nicholas II? Anyways, get rid of those pesky Irish first if you plan to bring the Empire back, like in my short-lived AAR.

EDIT: No wonder! They were first cousins!!!
 
Raze said:
Is it just me, or does King George V look like Tsar Nicholas II? Anyways, get rid of those pesky Irish first if you plan to bring the Empire back, like in my short-lived AAR.

EDIT: No wonder! They were first cousins!!!
Yes Ireland first!
 
Raze said:
Is it just me, or does King George V look like Tsar Nicholas II? Anyways, get rid of those pesky Irish first if you plan to bring the Empire back, like in my short-lived AAR.

EDIT: No wonder! They were first cousins!!!
Which one is which? :wacko:

tsarnicholasiikinggeorgor8.jpg
 
I bet they call eachother every night so they can match their clothes and hair. :rofl:
 
Are they cousins or brothers?
 
Chapter II: The Clam Before Teh Storm

Yes I am well aware that I wrote 'clam', and not 'calm'...

So on we plod on our merry way to war. I regret that I got rather caught up in the game, and forgot to take alot of screen shots, but thats ok. ALSO, if anyone could tell me how to take screen shot of the LEDGERS, thatd be much appreciated, as I keep trying with F11, but no picture is stored.

As promised, all land doctrines have been abandoned:
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duuhhhhhh how do we fight...?

but that is ok. All was not lost for the slow brained British infantry who suddenly forgot everything they had been taught. It wasnt long before the researched doctrines were back, and better!!

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duhhh.... im smart again...!!
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yaaaaay Blitzkrieg!!

The shot wasnt taken in 1937, I just forgot to take a screenie of the Inf. development, but was so excited about researching it about a year earlier than I usually do that I had to include it :D
Moving along, Paddy thought he'd be a funny guy and demand land from me... FROM ME!?
who does he think he is? like hell ill give Ulster to the rabid Catholic majority.. (Yes i did an Ireland paper this semester... it was pretty good, i advise anyone to learn about it...) Also I have nothing against the Catholics at all :)
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Silly bugger arent we?

As usual the Spanish Civil War fired. Which, didnt shock me. I went with supply the Republicans, as I believed that having an ally in spain would be to my benefit later.
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They lost.

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That is the last time I EVER help the Spanish. They can now look forward to an invasion from Britain once the Soviets are taken care of.
Japan throws her toys and declares war on the whole of Asia (seemingly...), but im not that worried... you see... I HAVE A SHUPER SCHNEAKY PLAN!!

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Which will be revealed later on...

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Heres a shot of the British army in the Isles at some stage. I dont quite know when, but suffice to say that it is now marginally larger.
 
Chapter II Part II

This stuff wouldnt fit in the 1st update. Here:

And finally, well for this update anyway, the most important part of the 20th century occurs... It was dastardly, cowardly and... well to be honest, sad really.


Poor old King Zog, already had a shitty name (I bet he got teased at school... kind like Edward would have, coz he looked like a git), lead a pretty shitty country, and had a shitty army, found itself under pressure for shitty Mussolini. He had balls though, probably because of fighting his schoolyard bullies, and did not buckle under this pressure. Good lad. As such, Italy went to war with the puny, no-IC country of Albania...

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QUIT PICKING ON ME!!!

Sexcellent...

All shall be revealed in the next update, possibly later today, ooorrrrr tomorrow.

ps, the prettttttyyyyy Edward VII found a bit of skirt in some American, and abdicated. woohoo, now we got someone else who is equally unimportant, but doesnt take 10% off my IC!!
Also I have begun to construct a more modern fleet for the defense of the Isles, and possibly for the destruction of the Japanese... OR THE MIGHTY IRISH NAVY!!! OOoOOoOOOO
 
Raze said:
Which one is which? :wacko:

The Tsar is the one on the left, the King is the one on the left. That's the problem when your moms are sisters (Dagmar of Denmark - Nicholas, Alexandra of Denmark - George). Good old Vicky and his marriage bussiness, you know... :D

For a second, BTW, I thought that Albania had DoW on Italy... I need to clean my glasses. :D
 
Chapter III: TEH VAR!!
Africa

Italy's ultimatum to poor widdle Albania ended up being one of the dumbest thing an Italian's ever done.

THIS is because Britain had been assuring Albania for years now that if they found themselves in a spot of bother, we shall come to their aid. This we did.

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"I say Basil. Those naughty Eyeties are in for it now!"

Rather indeed Cecil.... As soon as the Italian ambassador had the declaration of war in his sad hands our army in North Africa hit the Italian lines before they could entrench.

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"Cecil... These Eyeties should be beaten by 5, care for a brew up?"

To aid the invasion on the border, a SHUPER SCHNEAKY plan was unveiled, and a royal marine corps aided by an armoured division stormed ashore at Benghazi under the watchful eye of the Med fleet.

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Seemingly at the same time, but in reality a couple of hours apart, Italy shits itself and tries to get out of their predicament by offering us their North African empire. Fat chance of that. Also, Germany has a wee cry about their little friend being pummeled, and declare war on us. Im not really that worried, because we are on our own little Island yaaaay

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"Nuts to both of you"

After a month the situation in North africa looks very very good
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teh leet armies

SHOCKINGLY! the French are going the opposite way to the fighting... conincidence...??
Also, in Ethiopia, the Eyeties didnt know they were going to have to fight yet, so werent really ready, and had no armies present. My Militas made short work of walking around Ehtipoia i tells ya.
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muuuummmmmm im bored! are we there yet??

Finally, the devestating effect of air power is evident to the Italians, FAIRY BATTLES HO! haha
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It wasnt long before British armoured divisions were in Tripoli, and began to mop up the Italian leftovers
Next: War comes home for Italy
 
Last edited:
Nice little AAR you've got going.

You should remove the swastikas though. Against forum rules.
 
Tits. I thought i had. thanks for that
 
So good so far. Now, what can Germany do?
 
Retard said:
At the last picture.. How did you get your tacs to look like that??

Yeah theyre CAS, Ive got the SKIF pack going on, its awesome.
get it here