Chapter II - Best Day Ever
My sincerest apologies for the delay. I threw the first draft of this out, then I got sick, then I had to take exams. But I am finally back and still alive, so here we are! Apologies for the quality of this one since I haven't had time to warm up after I not being able to write for a week.
TWO
BEST DAY EVER
“Sometimes, I wonder...” Raphail said aloud to no in particular. Unfortunately, Ximena happened to be in the room and thought he was talking to her.
“You wonder about what?” Her face had lit up, excited to actually talk to her husband for once. Ever since she had left Navarra to come to Athens about a year ago, she had very rarely even held conversation with the man who brought her there in the first place. She had figured out his queer tendencies within a week or so, and she was only looking for friendship. She had been lonely in the palace, primarily because there was a rather surprising lack of almost any noblewomen at all besides the older, married ones. Raphail sighed.
“Well, if you must know, I'm wondering how to get Vagharshak to stop bothering me all the time.” Ximena saw an opportunity.
“I'm sure he's just very lonely. I bet if you get him a wife, she'll keep him occupied at least some of the time!”
He laughed, then his face slowly became more serious. “Incredible. Something useful actually came out of your mouth!” She pouted, and he laughed again. “I will arrange for some lowborn girl to come to the palace.”
“He needs a strong woman, not some weak-willed peasant. You know how those mobster types are. Even I do, and I'm from Navarra where there is a distinct lack of Armenian nobles.”
“You see, there is a slight problem. A strong woman is usually a smart woman. And any woman who had an actual brain would never agree to marry Vagharshak.”
“Surely there must be a smart woman with a stupid father somewhere in the world!” Ximena exclaimed. Raphail stared and then slowly nodded. Indeed, even though it was hard to find a genius without genius parents, perhaps he could find a woman who was at least of moderate intelligence who was born to an idiot. An idiot stupid enough to marry his daughter to Vagharshak. Where would he find one...?
–
Raphail walked throughout the manor, trying to find his pseudo-friend. He wasn't in any of his usual spots, like the kitchen, the armory, or the small dark corner near the dungeon that he liked to wait in to jump out at people. He tried thinking where he hadn't been. Then, he realized there was one room he hadn't yet paid a visit to. “It can't be,” he said, running down the hallway.
He turned and opened the door. Indeed, as he had expected, Vagharshak was sitting inside. Reading. In the library. Raphail's mouth hung open. “Why the hell do you know how to read?” he asked accusingly. Perhaps it wasn't a book with words so much as one with pictures. But Raphail didn't think he owned one of those, books with pictures were very expensive and, despite being the glorious duke of Athens, he lacked the necessary funds. It was unlikely there was one in the whole ducal library.
“Raphail, my friend!” Vagharshak exclaimed as he looked up from the book. Raphail caught a glance at one of the pages. He could
hear his world view shattering as his brain deciphered the images to mean that yes, the Armenian man actually
was reading words.
“I know how read because father taught me. He was very interested in books, and in write them. He actually make machine that could print pages of a book very quick, no need for write,” Vagharshak said.
“I've never heard of such a machine.”
“It was very interesting. But no one really wanted read books, and then machine get lost after house fire. He not remember how make. Is very sad.”
“What did he call this machine?”
“I think he call press of some kind. Print press. That what it is.”
“Oh, I see. Well it sounds rather silly, your father should have put his time into something that would actually change the world. Like a new kind of weapon.”
“I agree. Is actually funny how ridiculous idea was, now that I think about it. This why I become mafia, to show father that hurting people make you much more successful than word. But I also like reading.”
Raphail nodded. It was strange how suddenly he could feel himself empathizing with Vagharshak. That was a bad sign, he needed to stop immediately. What had he come here for?
“Ah, yes, I remember why I'm even here in the first place. Congratulations, friend, you're getting married!”
“What? I not find wife.”
“I know, I find – er, found, one for you. Or at least I will, I haven't yet. But it's time for you to be married, then hopefully you will stop trying to extort money from my captain of the guard since you'll actually have something to do.”
Vagharshak smiled and tried to run over to give him a hug, but Raphail closed the door and went back to his chambers.
–
As Raphail walked back into his room and prepared to lie down, already exhausted from the very surreal conversation he had just had, his wife was waiting with a smile on her face. “I have some great news, darling!”
“Please don't call me that. Also, what is it?”
“I'm pregnant!” she exclaimed. They had already worked out a deal where she could sleep with anyone she wanted and Raphail wouldn't care, as long as the child was said to belong to him. That took away his need to complete his most awful duty as her husband.
“Fantastic. That means you'll be busy too, and soon no one will be able to disturb me! Things are great for you Raphail, you're really on top!” he said, genuinely smiling. Ximena pouted again.