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unmerged(8830)

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Apr 20, 2002
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Little Teke: A Nation of Fish(ermen)

1419: It is the year 1419, by the Christian Calender. Why are we using the Christian Calander? I
don’t know. I look around to see the nation I have picked. Teke. A silly name. And a silly place.
Full of fish. That is what everyone in the capital does. Fish.

I was offered fish consistently every time I enter the market. I am heartily sick of fish, not that I
liked it in the first place.

Ahem. So our domestic areas are a mess. Let’s look at military matters. So I go to the barracks.
And quickly leave. The place stinks of rotten fish. The military has had so much disuse, that they
have been put to work gutting fish. So in other words, my entire-ENTIRE, mind you-military
consists of an untrained rabble of 5,000 infantry, and 1,000 cavalry.

OK. So our economy is a mess, our military is a bunch of fish gutters.... Can’t anything be good
in this country?

Foreign policy. Surely the foreign surroundings are somewhat good. I look.

I wish I hadn’t looked.

To our north was the monster Ottoman Empire. To our east was Karaman, not necessarily a
monster, but three times our size. Uh oh. Not to mention that the Ottomans declared war on
Candar, and after a 11 month, 19 day Candar is annexed. We prepare our military by building
more troops (the fish stink will surely crush our enemies) and by changing the Domestic Policies
one to narrow-mindedness.
 
Teke? Go underdog! :D

I assume that your main objective will not be any fancy stuff, but just to survive :p
 
I have a feeling that Teke is going to become the bane of the Middle East and of Christian Europe.... :D
 
EU2 has taught me, if anything, that nothing ever will go the same way twice in the middle east and balkans. I eagerly await watching the fishy hordes run roughshod throughout Asia Minor. :D
 
They're mean.
They're rotten.
And they reek of fish...
 
Thanks for all the replies! I was almost moaning by this time. Did this have to be the one time the Ottomans expand historically?


1420-1429: Wonderful. A decade of change. Well, not really. Our people still eat fish. The Ottomans, early in the decade, declare war on Karaman. In 1422, they take two provinces from them (the Ottomans from Karaman). We also managed to get an alliance with the monster (we had to buy their diplomats some beers first). We also built some galleys.

On the domestic front, people ate fish. They also built a naval equipment manufactory (code phrase for “Place where fish are processed”), and formed a monopoly company (for the fish
market).

Not much else happened, except people kept rejecting royal marriages and gifts, complaining they smelled like fish (How can we help it?).

1430-1439: We fight against Byzantium, a war in which our hard earned galley fleet (really just outsized fishing boats) defeated the Byzantine navy from Teke to Morea, heroically sinking several ships (mostly by hurling dead fish, asphyxiating their crews and causing them to be lost by the sharks which happened to be hungry that year).

We also fought against the greatly reduced Karaman, whose one province we entered. Upon asking why they had no army, the Karaman(ers? ese? i?) replied they were busy shearing sheep.
They apparently had our problem, except with a different phylum. By December 1433, we annexed Karaman! Other than that, we were dragged into a war with Ack Kooulooyoonoo, or something like that. We did not fight, and accepted a white peace.

In the domestic area, we were revitalized by a new resource. Sheep! Now we were a nation of Fish(ermen) wrapped in Wool.

Other than that, it stayed the same.
 
Originally posted by Snow King

In the domestic area, we were revitalized by a new resource. Sheep! Now we were a nation of Fish(ermen) wrapped in Wool.

Other than that, it stayed the same.


And, with an adjustment of the INNOVATIVE slide, Haggis comes to Turkey!
 
Teke is an original choice, and I'm enjoying all the fish jokes! It is brain food, though, and so far that shows with your strategy. I wonder who will be the next victim for your growing fish and wool empire? :D
 
Originally posted by Judas Maccabeus
Please don't be Trebizond, Please don't be Trebizond, Please don't be Trebizond, please, please...

They were annexed by Ack Kooyooloonoo. :)
 
Nice AAR and good luck with Teke. It should be Ok as long as you're allied with the monster.

At least you can make a lot of dishes with fish (thinks about a kind of Forrest Gump list :D)
 
Update!

1440-1449: The decade started off well, with a revolt in Sheepia (Taurus a.k.a. Karaman), which was put down. We asked why they revolted. They replied that they did not have enough grain.
We told them to eat fish instead, but I guess we should get a grain province. We made plans....

In 1441, we gained military access through the Ottomans, and set up our troops along the Dardanelles and the Hellespont. The moment came, and the Ottomans declared war on Byzantium. Thanks to our careful planning, we were at the forefront of the Ottoman armies.

In the meantime, the Byzantines landed a small army in Fishland (Anytalya a.k.a. Teke), which soon moved on. They did this several times until our ships hurled fish at their’s and forced them
to leave.

The Turks took Thrace, and they took Hellas from the Byzantines, while we dealt with a revolt. Sigh. The peasants are so restless.

Soon after the war, there was a political crises as a tray of fish was accidentally hurled into the faces of the Kaliph’s diplomats. Stability dropped again. It is not easy being a nation of wool
wrapped fish.

The scientists discovered that you could do something with logs near the frontier besides firewood (Infra level 2 (TPs) ), and an unexpected invention was discovered as the scientists
realized (unexpectedly) that you could build Goods in a Factory. Oh, wait, you can do that. You have to build them in a Goods Manufactory.
 
I thought goods in the EU2 map were blanket representations, as in fish would represent all seafood, sheep would represent all woolen stuff etc.
Couldn't Teke diversify and produce... shellfish? Clams are cute. :)
 
Excellent AAR.

I predict your life-expectancy to 3 seconds once the Ottomans Goes East.
 
I would say I'm looking forward to it, except I once smelled some of that stuff
blink.gif
!

I'll need lots of alcohol to wash that taste away. Do you think they'll have alcohol? ;)