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Thread: Your Evil Doings in CK2.

  1. #1

    Your Evil Doings in CK2.

    Me, being annoyed at the civil wars going on once every 20 years, I decided to purge my realm.

    My King was old, had piety, and a little gold for mercenaries in case anything happened.

    I began by imprisoning the heir of every single duchy and county. Roughly 4 people escaped.

    Then, I began imprisoning Dukes, and banishing. Luckily for me, my overall intrigue was pretty high, and about 6 of my dukes rebelled. I got them, imprisoned, and banished. I am now at a point, 3 years later as my son, controlling every title in Britannia, with 30k gold, and 15 rebelling bishops/mayors left.

    Time to sit back, upgrade some of my expanded demense, and redistribute lands to loyal, freshly invited to court Englishmen, and give them only 1 county each.



    Edit: Now my King has just died, and my son, got married to amazing stat twin sister.

    As for those four people that escaped, well, I have gold, and an assassinate option..
    Last edited by ShotoLord; 21-02-2013 at 16:17.

  2. #2
    Forcing closely-related relatives to marry each other if it will benefit the dynasty.

  3. #3
    I've never done anything evil, anyone who says different is already dead.

  4. #4
    Starting and regularly losing plot-kill wars after the target begins to bring in heirs from distant relations rather than appointing me as heir. I don't know why I keep doing it, but it is like every generation I pick a title (generally one that doesn't fit into my neat de jure fetish) and begin killing the people that hold it, or their heirs, and after killing 5-10 people learning that I can keep going for a long time, and then give up. I suppose that makes my ruler not only evily ambitious, but also terribly callous as the poor family is left bled white for absolutely no change in the big picture. Like a boy playing with a magnifying glass over an anthill.

    Also I often find myself pruning out the bad weeds of my family, even relatively distant relations if I notice them. No dwarfs, no slow, no hunchbacks, no imbeciles and no inbred... For some reason these traits have a tendency to attract suspicious accidents.

    I guess I shouldn't be mad when I get Kinslayer, as I truly do deserve it when it happens (almost never get it on the first few kills).

  5. #5
    It's 1066 September 15th I decide that Harold godwinson has gone mad and does the following- he mints lots of bad money and fakes a great religious experience "cash cheat, piety cheat" assassinating William the conquerer and Harold of Norway he then proceeds to arrest and banish all earls and dukes of the realm destroying all titles other than Cornwall. The man is crazed with tyrannical mania. He then in a moment of realisation decides he has acted poorly.

    Deciding England deserves better harold provides the basis for a strong government and makes good on his wrongs. Edgar is made a powefull lord with lands Cornwall, Devon, Gloucester, Wiltshire, Oxford, Bedford, middlesex, norfolk and Suffolk. He is duke of Cornwall. A ballanced government is sought by Harold who decides that no other major lords should exist so he divides each remaining duchy to hold one count, one city and the others to be bishops thus strengthening the realm. Despite all this justice for the realm. Harold is greatly distrusted and recognising this Harold decides that meekness is his salvation, disbanding his army Harold transfers all his vassals except for the cities and churchlands of Cheshire harold's only remaining demsne to the best man in the realm Edgar edwardson the last of the house of Wessex. Edgar assumes the kingship and Harold submits to be Edgar's vassal. Harold had the ultimate pique of energy in one day changing the face of 3 realms forever. He died assassinated within the year but his heirs still hold Cheshire and some land in Wales now. Edgar new he was fortunate in his lands and never took them for granted ruling wisely and careful never to defraud or Mispeak his faith. (no cheating)

    Time to play the game with the king and the realm I want.

    Btw I have played the game with Edgar as king without cheating I just wanted the start point. But I'm evil. The godwinson for once don't have 50 odd living members with 20 different titles lol.
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  6. #6
    - Create Kingdom of Ireland
    - Convince remaining dukes/counts to become vassals by paper or sword
    - Imprison banish or slaughter every single land holder or claimant as well the majority of the court
    - Rule Ireland unopposed with an entire batch of fresh happy vassals.

  7. #7
    General Red_warning's Avatar
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    I fathered five bastards with a landless courtier, and figured that since she gave me more children than my actual wife I might as well marry her. So I divorced the old infertile hag and created a new happy family.

  8. #8
    As a legitimised bastard (Duke of Kent) I pushed my father's widow's claim (one of William the Conqueror's daughters) on the Duchy of Flanders. I then plotted to kill the children of my only surviving half-sister until she turned 45. Then just waited for her titles to pass to me as her closest surviving relative.

  9. #9
    Konungr of Scandinavia DarkieBabZ's Avatar
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    For some reason I really like to Blind and Castrate the rulers of "Friends" in MP games.

    For some odd reason they lost the will to fight me anymore.
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  10. #10
    Going to Scarborough Fair cybrxkhan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Teutonic_Thrash View Post
    Forcing closely-related relatives to marry each other if it will benefit the dynasty.
    Same here.


    Your sister/brother is also an attractive, strong, genius whatever with at least 15+ or 20+ in every stat? Sorry, kiddo, go marry.

    The chances of getting inbred are completely dwarfed by the changes of getting another generation of superstrong, superattractive, supergeniuses with high stats.
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  11. #11
    Regent-Custodian of the Light riknap's Avatar
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    does dynasty-cide via mass-murder count?
    no? another day at the office then
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  12. #12
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    Aided a woman in killing her brother, while simultaneously having her brother aid me in disposing of her. I ended up destroying their entire dynasty, because they were a 'threat to my power'. Also, isn't having a spymaster increase assassination chance on themselves just so rewarding?
    "Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."-Napoleon Bonaparte

  13. #13
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    My one and only playthrough as the ERE I ended up with a female Empress. She loooooved castrating dudes. Not just nobles mind you, her relatives, random courtiers, POWs, you name it. I'm RPing that she has a room full of them pickled in jars somewhere in the palace (like the purple room of genitals . She didn't keep her kingdom long obviously.

  14. #14
    Grand Strategist takedown47's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Heartsbane View Post
    My one and only playthrough as the ERE I ended up with a female Empress. She loooooved castrating dudes. Not just nobles mind you, her relatives, random courtiers, POWs, you name it. I'm RPing that she has a room full of them pickled in jars somewhere in the palace (like the purple room of genitals . She didn't keep her kingdom long obviously.
    got a screenshot of this purple room of genitals?

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by takedown47 View Post
    got a screenshot of this purple room of genitals?
    Only in my mind

  16. #16
    Grand Strategist takedown47's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Heartsbane View Post
    Only in my mind
    Maybe she was a radical feminist? The Germaine Greer of the medieval world? I shudder at the thought of her as Queen with absolute power.

  17. #17
    Field Marshal
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    Having homosexual characters marry, which in some cases could be avoided.

    Somewhat gamey matrimarriage.

    Somewhat bad-looking use of the problems sons tend to have with fathers around the time of growing up to invite them to my court.

    Landing the heir of a title with an equal tier title in my vassalage to make that title flip to my vassalage too.

    Could argue about the justice of some of my wars.

    Hoping to stop doing some of the above.
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  18. #18
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    Between the ages of 73 and 78, had 2 kids with my own wife, 2 with my heir's wife, and 2 with the chancellor's wife. The cuckolds thought the bastards were their own and I made sure these kids were schooled by those parents.

    I sent my chaplain to Rome to suck up to the Pope. The chaplain was the ONLY literate man in the whole realm, nobody else in any of my dominions having learning over 1. But the chaplain died from "severe stress" on the journey so I picked some illiterate bozo (learning 1) at random to do the job while waiting for the church to appoint a new bishop. This guy was already married but I told him the job was only temporary so just go with it. Well, pretty soon a new bishop arrived, 38 years old but with ZEROs in ALL stats! Huh? No way I was getting stuck with such an moron and, not being able to appoint my own bishops, I had to kill him. That was easy enough and soon the 2nd replacement bishop arrived, this guy having very good stats, so I fired my random bozo and installed the new guy. But by then, the bozo had decided he liked the job so was furious with me, as were several other folks by now for other reasons. So that meant several more suspicious carriage accidents. All this trouble just because my original chaplain was so rude as to die on the way to Rome.

    I've made my marshall arrest himself, my spymaster assassinate himself, and my chaplain talk himself into liking me more than the Pope. I've murdered the wives and children of my neighbors just so I could get them into matrilinear marriages with my own daughters. I've murdered people just because I was out of honorary titles to give them and so couldn't fix their low opinion of me. I've accepted heretical faiths just because I was bored.
    -Bullethead
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    "I've snapped and plotted all my life. That's the only way to be king, alive, and 50 all at once!"

  19. #19
    Second Lieutenant TheKeef's Avatar
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    My Byzantine Emp just up and dies with no son, so my daughter who I married off to a doofus to keep their offspring out of the picture, becomes Basillia.

    Killed my ugly, near moronic first born son of another husband(who had died already fortunately), married the Prince of France and went to war with Father-in-Law right away and deposed him, had a child who is now in line to be Byzantine Emp and King of France, Greece, Croatia, Anatolia, Serbia, and perhaps one other country.

    Start a plot, kill Hubby, boom huge land grab that gets me the entire Nation of France without any more blood than the first war whatsoever (though hubby fended off some rebellions and such on his own before the poisoned wine bit..)

    TLDR?
    Killed my firstborn to have another son with real claims not crap ones, Killed my hubby when that happend, took their lands, conquered most of Europe through this...
    Do it please ya...

  20. #20
    Captain SweArdaia's Avatar
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    Setting my self up as the heir to the byzantine empire, without knowing that republics can't inherit feudal titles. Ended up assasinating my kids and senior family members to get my heir on the throne..

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