Funny moments in history

[zezeb]

Now I wonder, what are there for funny moments in history?
Ironic ones, funny things said by a leader/to a leader and all that.

Like this, A japanese officer was visited by some german around 1930s and was told that "You can take your third reich and shove it up your arse."

Or during the great fire of London, a politician burried his cheese to save it from the fire...
(The back-story of that is that cheese costed ALOT and it was imported from Italy)

ALSO could a Moderator change the title? I mistacly mispelled it and didn't notice it until now... I have no idea how I spelled it that way and I apologize for it.

[Fishman786]

hahahahah... This is certainly amongst the funny moments!

[zezeb]

hahahahah... This is certainly amongst the funny moments!

Well it isn't so funny for me... I got no bloody idea how it happend, eh...

[Jayavarman]

There were moments in history where poorly written officer commands resulted in great loss of life. Think about that the next time your type out a thread title.

[RedRalphWiggum]

[videonfan]

I remember an austrian battle...among themselves
The hungarians were camping,and on the other side of the river,there were romanians selling vodka
Their calary went to buy some and got drunk and started shooting in the air.
The infantry,thinking that they were the ottomans started shooting everywhere and after a few minutes they routed
The generals didn't knew what to do
When the ottomans arrived weeks later they found many dead and wounded

[hyder]

I remember an austrian battle...among themselves
The hungarians were camping,and on the other side of the river,there were romanians selling vodka
Their calary went to buy some and got drunk and started shooting in the air.
The infantry,thinking that they were the ottomans started shooting everywhere and after a few minutes they routed
The generals didn't knew what to do
When the ottomans arrived weeks later they found many dead and wounded

Though, "the battle" may never have happened at all. There is a wiki article about it btw.

E: There is a story about a certain Finnish infantry soldier who twice took the same Russian shot-down fighter pilot as a prisoner of war. Once in the Winter War and two years later in the Continuation War.

[zezeb]

E: There is a story about a certain Finnish infantry soldier who twice took the same Russian shot-down fighter pilot as a prisoner of war. Once in the Winter War and two years later in the Continuation War.

Heh. That's a good one.

During world war 2, americans tried something called "Mexican kamikaze". They putted small napalm wests on mexican bats. Even tho this was never used something fun happend. The idea was that they'd release them outside the coast of Japan at dawn, and then they'd sleep under the japanese structures and ships so after a while it'd blow up. But the wind changed at the bat was blown back to the american base and it blew up the americans instead.(Poetic Justice)

[bugwar]

•In September of 1855, during the British and French occupation of Sebastopol after a long siege, a Zouave seen making off with a large tom-cat explained that he wished to give to his grandmother to replace one which the Russians had stolen when they occupied Paris in 1815.

Source: http://www.strategypage.com/cic/docs/cic394a.asp

[Tornadoli]

I preferred the previous title...

[DarthJF]

Considering the present day US-China rivalry and the once again warm relations between China and Russia, it's kind of funny to think, that during the cold war Soviet Union seriously tought about nuking China, and it was fear of angering the US that prevented them from carrying on with it.

[Korgus]

The battle of Trinidade.

The British ship Carmania was disguised as the German ship Cap Trafalgar, and the Cap Trafalgar was disguised as the Carmania. They ran into each other.

[gordonah]

"They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance."
General Sedgwick
Battle of Spotsylvania

[bugwar]

In 1610, attempting to avoid their onerous militia obligations, the citizens of Brandenburg argued that they should not engage in target practice because the noise would frighten pregnant women.

source: http://www.strategypage.com/cic/read...=0&BeginCnt=61

[Sarmatia1871]

I very much like the story of Louis Napoleon's attempted coup of 1840, where he landed in Boulogne with fifty men and a pet vulture (impersonating a Napoleonic eagle), was promptly set upon by the local garrison, and - while attempting to flee - his boat capsized and he needed to be ignominiously fished out of the sea.

He was then promptly arrested.

[Watercress]

This is more crude than funny, but still: In essence, Sultan Mehmed IV sent a letter to the Zaporozhian Cossacks, asking for their submission. It read something like this:

As the Sultan; son of Muhammad; brother of the Sun and Moon; grandson and viceroy of God; ruler of the kingdoms of Macedonia, Babylon, Jerusalem, Upper and Lower Egypt; emperor of emperors; sovereign of sovereigns; extraordinary knight, never defeated; steadfast guardian of the tomb of Jesus Christ; trustee chosen by God himself; the hope and comfort of Muslims; confounder and great defender of Christians—I command you, the Zaporozhian Cossacks, to submit to me voluntarily and without any resistance, and to desist from troubling me with your attacks.
—Turkish Sultan Mehmed IV

The Cossacks decidely to reply rather rudely:

Zaporozhian Cossacks to the Turkish Sultan!
Thou art a turkish imp, the damned devil's brother and friend, and a secretary to Lucifer himself. What the devil kind of knight art thou that cannot slay a hedgehog with your naked ass? The devil shits, and your army eats. Thou son of a bitch wilt not ever make subjects of Christian sons; we have no fear of your army, by land and by sea we will battle with thee, fuck thy mother.
Thou art the Babylonian scullion, Macedonian wheelwright, brewer of Jerusalem, goat-fucker of Alexandria, swineherd of Greater and Lesser Egypt, Armenian pig, Podolian villain, catamite of Tartary, hangman of Kamyanets, and fool of all the world and underworld, a fool before our God, a grandson of the Serpent, and the crick in our dick. Pig's snout, mare's arse, slaughterhouse cur, unchristened brow, screw thine own mother!
So the Zaporozhians declare, you lowlife. Thou wilt not even be herding Christian pigs. Now we shall conclude, for we don't know the date and don't have a calendar; the moon/month's in the sky, the year in the book, the day's the same over here as it is over there; for this kiss our ass!
Koshovyi Otaman Ivan Sirko, with the whole Zaporozhian Host.

[theusje]

"I have sinned."

[Fishman786]

Marco Polo describing how the Deccanese mine their diamonds was rather amusing. Supposedly people couldn't get into the diamond-rich valleys because of giant 'serpents' so instead they got chunks of raw meat and threw them into the valleys, where the diamonds stuck into them. Then eagles would come and eat the raw meat and the diamonds stuck to it, and when the eagles shat them back out the miners would gather up the diamond-laced bird poo.

Some people have interesting imaginations...

[Imperator1993]

Western Roman Emperor Honorius being told the Goths had taken Roma, thinking there were talking about his favorite pet chicken named Roma.

[NapoleonComple]

Upon asking how much of England Harold intended to give him in 1066, Hardrada recieved the answer "six feet. No, seven, since you are a little taller than most men."

Rather darkly humorous as Harold was as good as his word.