How to be Almost Slightly Less Mediocre Than Usual in Divine Wind

[Ashantai]

You've done well to maximise the time you get with Holy War. Will you shift back to Europe when 1650 rolls around?

[homy_dog34]

How to be Almost Slightly Less Mediocre Than Usual in Divine Wind Part 15

Hey y'all. I'm back again to finish off these last few holy wars.
Let's get right into things. I attack both Bijapur and Madurai with holy wars.

I annex Bijapur. However, Maldive has somehow managed to annex Madurai. I attack both Maldive and Vijayanagar. Maldive actually saved me a point of infamy!

In the mean time, I have completely vanquished Qara Koyunlu. the Caucasus are mine!

I take Madras off of Maldive, and I annex Vijayanagar. Easy pickings.

I attack Crete, so that I can lose 2 infamy from vassalizing them.

I vassalize and convert Crete, and complete my mission. Too bad my mission brings back bad memories from my Aragonese conquests.

Unfortunately, I lose a stability to a random event. Great...
Also, check out how much of India I own! Pretty sick, huh?

Now, Swahili attacks me for some reason. In retaliation I declare war on Delhi, Travanacore, Gujarat, and Assam.

I annex Swahili, Travanacore, and Assam.
I then attack Deva Bengal, who is Tibet's vassal.

I annex Gujarat as well. Now, Southern India is held my me, Great Britain, and Sweden. I have a core on Sweden's provinces there.

I take 2 provinces off of Delhi, and then force them to spit out Malwa.

As I am busy curb-stomping Tibet, I get another loss of stability event.
Wow I really events like that.

Anyways, I take 5 provinces off of Tibet. I feel like a winner.

And with that, all holy wars are now over!

Luckily, my war with Sibir is not even close to its finish. I have taken 2 provinces off of them already.

I now take my leave of you all. Here, have this map of my nation as a parting gift!

*Not shown: Mozambique, Diego Garcia, and Mahe.

Until next time...

[homy_dog34]

fix the link plz - at least for me it's broken.

Try this link here.

You've done well to maximise the time you get with Holy War. Will you shift back to Europe when 1650 rolls around?

Nowhere else to go!


Also, you guys are pretty sneaky, getting in 2 extra comments before I post. Well played.

[PdoxNewbie]

fix the link plz - at least for me it's broken.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=duHA7n36Jfs

[vasziljevics]

thanks - both of you!

your infamy is horrible - you deserve to be attacked by someone you don't want to be attacked by

[dragonizer]

Nice gains push right to the limit
Trying to read SFORZA AAR and you slip in two updates on me.
Keep up the mediocre work.

[Tallfellow]

You need to clean up the Balcans/Greece, remove all those strange colours so that the Hungarian tan spreads from Budapest to well China

[MrQwerty]

Well that's fantastic. Your empire stretches from Budapest to Burma and from Sibir to Swahili .

So, is it time to stop and catch up on technology ?

[homy_dog34]

thanks - both of you!

your infamy is horrible - you deserve to be attacked by someone you don't want to be attacked by

You're welcome! Also,

DON'T EVEN JOKE ABOUT THAT
I HAVE NIGHTMARES ABOUT MILAN AND BOHEMIA

Nice gains push right to the limit
Trying to read SFORZA AAR and you slip in two updates on me.
Keep up the mediocre work.

Well what can you do when you follow a mediocre AAR?

You need to clean up the Balcans/Greece, remove all those strange colours so that the Hungarian tan spreads from Budapest to well China

Tan: The color of men.

Well that's fantastic. Your empire stretches from Budapest to Burma and from Sibir to Swahili .

So, is it time to stop and catch up on technology ?

Ha.

Haha.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[homy_dog34]

How to be Almost Slightly Less Mediocre Than Usual in Divine Wind Part 16

Hey everyone! Sorry I took a few days to post again. I've been working on a mod for the game.

But anyways, let's just see if anything awesome is gonna happen this update.

First off, I've been colonizing Sibir for a little while now. But then Mutapa got all up in my grill and declared war on me.

Luckily Mutapa failed to take into account that they have no troops in the province they have bordering me, so I took it off of them with ease.

Meanwhile Bihar thinks that it would Bihar-larious to attack me.

I beg to differ, since I can't take any province off of them like this without getting 4 infamy...
But anyways, I cancel my current mission after getting peace. My new one is to break a blockade somewhere. Unfortunately, I totally forgot to this, so that isn't very good.

I then notice that I can create the East Indian Trade Company. I do it, of course.

Meanwhile, both Kazakh and Chagatai appear at my borders. Those scumbags. They'll pay for walking near my nation!

After that, I decide that it's time to do something a little more civilized, so I attack Sweden for my core in Telingana.

It is taken with little effort.

I have now fully occupied the remaining hordes of the world. I have about 10 to 15 colonies in horde lands. The hordes will soon be a threat no longer. (Not that they've been a threat recently, but you get the point.)

Of course, Crimea has a problem with that, considering that they are now a horde in 5.2 beta, so they go on the attack.

If you noticed in the previous image, I can now fully centralize. Maybe my stability will be regained soon enough to modernize my military.

When I said soon, I meant with a month and a half. I modernize my military. Winning ensues.

Of course, having -3 stability really puts a damper on things. Seriously. That revolt risk is horrible!

I stopped playing here, since I really didn't want to spend 2 hours playing just 1 year.

So, until next time...

[dragonizer]

Time to play wack-a-mole for a while
You may prevail. If mediocrity does not get in the way.

[MrQwerty]

Well, at least Hungary proper and your African colonies love you!

It's too bad you cannot go a-conquering anymore, since fighting Europeans is almost out of the question. I don't want to see a small Imperial state beat up a globe-trotting empire again. Get those rebels crushed .

[PdoxNewbie]

I'd just have your armies hunt rebels.

[Dauth]

May I suggest, Diplomat, Grand Marshal and High Judge. Your stab costs will be astronomical which will render the next ~20 years very painful indeed. You could well do with shedding infamy and any inflation soon to bring stab costs down. You have some money, invest in armes for rebel whacking and you may not lose anything.

Read both this and the Aragon AAR, nice writing style, most enertaining.

[Tallfellow]

Uhhh, that doesn't look too good... Well i'm sure that Hungary is up for the challenge of holding all of it's holdings together!!!

[mathl33t]

Does the red in the ocean mean pirates can spawn there?

GJ modernizing your military.

...Wait, make that mediocre job.

[Orlov Kruskayev]

OHHHH YAAAY
Fun with Rebels!

How about a bodycount on rebels in the next few updates? Like in this very mediocre piece of work?

[homy_dog34]

Time to play wack-a-mole for a while
You may prevail. If mediocrity does not get in the way.

Well, let's just say that mediocrity and me are always together, no matter what. So... yeah...

Well, at least Hungary proper and your African colonies love you!

It's too bad you cannot go a-conquering anymore, since fighting Europeans is almost out of the question. I don't want to see a small Imperial state beat up a globe-trotting empire again. Get those rebels crushed .

Well, my troops could actually fight a European army. I think my tech is about the same as theirs. Though, Bohemia would probably still trample me!

I'd just have your armies hunt rebels.

But of course.

May I suggest, Diplomat, Grand Marshal and High Judge. Your stab costs will be astronomical which will render the next ~20 years very painful indeed. You could well do with shedding infamy and any inflation soon to bring stab costs down. You have some money, invest in armes for rebel whacking and you may not lose anything.

Read both this and the Aragon AAR, nice writing style, most enertaining.

Well, I went Diplomat, Grand Marshal, and whatever the inflation guy is. Close enough, I guess! And thank you, I appreciate that.

Uhhh, that doesn't look too good... Well i'm sure that Hungary is up for the challenge of holding all of it's holdings together!!!

Why yes! Hungary is ugly mighty and proud!

Does the red in the ocean mean pirates can spawn there?

GJ modernizing your military.

...Wait, make that mediocre job.

I have no idea what the red means. I really don't bother fighting pirates, though. Also, thank you! I'm glad that you can comprehend the mediocrity of this AAR!

OHHHH YAAAY
Fun with Rebels!

How about a bodycount on rebels in the next few updates? Like in this very mediocre piece of work?

Oh yeah, that AAR is sooo mediocre. But anyways, I think I got around the total number of rebels I killed until a certain point. Don't want to spoil anything, but I'll just say the number were less than I expected.

[homy_dog34]

How to be Almost Slightly Less Mediocre Than Usual in Divine Wind Part 17

Hell again people, and welcome back to the most mediocre AAR in all the lands.

Let's get started on what is probably going to be a very boring update, shall we?
First things first, while I'm busy fighting hordes of rebels, I manage to assault Crimea's forts, and annex them.

After that, I just kinda wait around playing ping-pong. Eventually, I gain a core on one of Malwa's provinces, and one of Kazakh's defects to me.
I also cancel my mission, but my new one is to build a manufactory, so I didn't bother to take a screenshot.

Thousands of dead rebels, and a couple of horde provinces later, I finally regain one point of stability!

One or two more provinces defect to me before I get an event that gives me +1 stability!!!!
HALLELUJAH

Finally, on November 18, 1665, I get a day where there are no rebels besieging any of my provinces, anywhere!
I celebrate by taking a screenshot.

I guess my celebration was a bit much, since a few months later, I get one of the worst possible events I could receive.

I eventually regain the stability point naturally, but that still sucks...

I reach 0 stability in 1669.
In this picture, you can see my army headed towards an unoccupied Koda. This is because, for some reason, rebel armies can take down your forts in like 3 seconds in provinces you occupy. In fact, Koda had about 700 colonists there before I had to restart.

I take the colonial expansion decision, giving me -3% colonial cost and +3% colonial growth, at the cost of -3 infamy limit.
I also cancel my mission, but the new one is to build a manufactory, so I figured that I would shun it.

In 1670, I get an event giving me +1 stability. Great!

Anyways, I attack Malwa for core soon after that.

They hand it over after a short fight.

I get +2 stability at one point, giving me renewed vigor. In fact, I get so... vigorized(?), the I attack Tripoli.

Tripoli is made more mediocre than it was before. They are now mine!

I then attack protestant Travanacore for my core in their lands.

I take my core, but I also decide to take them as a vassal, since they are christian. More infamy!

Then, in July 1673, I take away Sibir's last province, ending their cruel reign of Tyranny over the Siberian people!

Oh yeah, I also attack Tunisia with the tribal conquest casus belli.(I totally didn't forget to take a screenshot. *cough*)

Anyways, I annex Tunisia, giving me a border with Spain's African holdings. Go me.

BUT
That's not the important part. The important part is that I've finally regained all of my stability!

During this time, I killed 176 rebel armies, totaling around 783,000 men. Quite an astounding number. I suppose that that accounted for everyone in Hungary that is less mediocre than me.
So, now everyone that is left is completely mediocre! What a great outcome! Totally worth all of the rebels, in my opinion.

Anyways, until next time...

[vasziljevics]

that Naples-owned Alexandria is very... disappointing. it perfectly fits with the mediocrity though.