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Alone on a top of a bloody hill on the holy land stood Duke Robert. Amongst the bodies he stood serene for he knew by doing the god's will he would earn a place in heaven for him and is future kin.
 
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His mother was the queen of Crannog
and his father was a spanish wardog
he is Danius the Splendid king of AoE
as a retarded dwarf with crooked teeth
he rode north to the land of Wyoming
where summer ends and winter is coming!
 
Ah what the heck, i feel like a bit of fun.

Michael, a great king, from the family of Durain,
With his armies did he make the enemy suffer pain,
Killed his wives, thrice, his mind unshaken,
Never to conceive - a dwarf in womens clothing.

I always love the wacky characters. :laugh:
 
After sailing to the holy land, Duke Thibault drove the French army deep into heathen forces. He maneuvered his king's army as a skilled warrior would maneuver his sword. After much blood was shed, Duke Thibault remained in Jerusalem as king.

(202 Characters)
 
In peace, he served, In hell he lived, and in war he loved.
Annoying vassals, flipping the Emperor and trolling the Czechs.
Such is the fun of King Heinrich of Bavaria and Bohemia.
 
The steppes used to be quiet before, thought Igor. He missed the hot summer's hunt of his childhood,
the usual chatter outside the gates of great city, now his capital, the usual hum of the guards on the walls, he missed it all now.

The city of his childhood now being turned into a capital of slavs, once again, like so many years before him, before Varangians fell, the city has turned into a great hive.
If his grandfather saw him today, thought Igor, he would be mighty proud. A tribe after tribe crushed, differences settled and old enemies at council, like snakes, beheaded.

No one dares challenge Igor now, not after what happened to Poles. A king's head in basket, that was a good present brought by his generals. They get their share.
The great city is buzzing and swirling, trying to store and forage food for a new army, an army that will challenge the West for the first time. Our ambassadors in the inner chambers praying and learning their instructions, ready to leave for the frontier cities of Hungary, to be offering fair terms to mayors who have good sense of living. Prayer is always good too before offering to foreigners what Igor has to say.

Igor now smiled, realizing the whole picture once again.

This is the biggest summer hunt of his life.
 
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There once was a Duke of Savoy
Ambitious since he'd been a boy
If his neighbours did sneeze
Their lands he would seize
In EU3 he'd have lots of Badboy
 
From his patch of western land, Ronan de Bretagne was bound to rule France. Was the king Arthur spirit giving him such bravery ? The foolishness of Avalon sorcerers ? No.
He won, they bowed.
196
 
The silver tongued devil prefers flattery and soothing to bloodshed. A bit daft in open combat the duke is not afraid to use intrigue, knowing one blade in the dark can be worth 10,000 on the field.
 
A holy Polish king, seeking nothing but glory and to see the kingdom of Rus become his through marriage and intrigue. Scared to fight on the field and weak in the body but able in the soul to conquer!
 
She is attractive and cruel, her hair as red as the blood that flows down the hilt of the dagger that impaled her young stepmother before her efforts stole the throne. She is the queen of Sicily.
 
My ruler likes cats. All he thinks about is cats. He made a cat, Mr. Tinkles, his heir. He was called a heretic for marrying his cat, and has been henceforth barred from all church picnics. Elect Gerhardt, 1077: Cats for a Change.

(Yeah.)
 
A genius who became the emperor of the Holy Roman Empire by a total surprise thanks to his charming diplomatic skills. The duchy of Upper Burgundy prospered greatly from his emperorship. Kingdom of Burgundy was founded and imperial laws were changed so that hefty tax from the nobility of the HRE could be divereted to build great castles and cities to Burgundy. Sadly fertility isn't one of the virtues of the unearthily skilled emperor - his only son is an imbecile who'll probably ruin majority of what his father achieved unless he has an accident and dies.
 
Emperor Niphon of Byzantium
Became a pagan at the age of one
revoked titles of his subjects
religiously, they didn't object
He coveted all his vassals wealth
robbed from the rich and gave to himself
 
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Of nimble mind and deft tongue unlike his brutish rivals, he often found the sharpest blade was a kind word, a beautiful daughter the perfect spy, and a fistful of gold the most loyal soldier.
 
Barking orders and charging ahead in a man's armor and cloth, sword raised high above her, was the searing image last engraved in the minds and hearts of the soldiers of the Tyrant Queen of Hungary.