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How to be Completely Mediocre in Divine Wind Part 5​

Hi again everyone, and thank you for the many responses on the last update. For this, I give you an update in only one day's time!
But anyways, let's start things off with the consensus pick of Quest for the New World as my new national idea.
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I will start by colonizing Rio de Oro, the Canaries, and the Azores. Portugal already has Madeira.
Unfortunately for me, I lose my heir almost immediately after the start of this update, and I also lose a stability for it. Great.
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But things are looking up after this, to say the least. How about I merge my throne with Portugal's, eh? Sounds good to me.
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However, the Portuguese weren't as willing as myself to give me their throne, so I decide that force must be applied before we can become one nation.
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And I easily win the war. I get 2 new vassal buddies, and a new throne to rule as the result of it. Happy days!
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Fez declares a jihad on me at some point, I don't remember exactly when, but the point is, that only fools would declare war on mighty Aragon.
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And so I easily kick their butts, and show them that foolishness is not tolerated in the Aragonese empire.
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I make a move towards naval, to give me an edge in colonization. I'm not sure how much it will actually help, though.
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I cancel my mission to build up my fleet, and get a new one to vassalize Navarra (again). I will probably do this soon enough, if I don't get distracted.
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Distracted that is, by something like this. Oh I really hate this event SO much. It is really annoying. I mean having a strong economy is good and all, but this is kinda ridiculous.
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And now is the ONE thing that I have been fearing. A war with Burgundy.
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Algiers also attacks me for no reason, but meh. What can you do about those heathens?
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Fortunately for me, Burgundy foolishly let their armies assault my provinces when I was right next to them. These still were tough fights for me, considering that Burgundy has far superior morale(and possibly troop type) to my own. I still managed to harass them into offering this, though.
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Algiers is annexed soon after, due to the fact that they were stupid enough to attack me with a casus belli that granted me 1 infamy province gains.
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My king dies on me, and fortunately Portugal is not integrated into my realm. I don't want this to happen just yet, because I need them to help colonize the New World. Also, my heir sucks.
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I make a move towards quality, because making new troops is expensive and time-consuming. Apparently having better armies is a bad thing to the nobles.
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And of course, this update wouldn't be complete without me getting another monetary reform, even though I've only had my last reform a decade or 2 ago.
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Finally, here is a map of the world. Denmark inherited their pals, Scotland is the "NEW" England, France is dead, Burgundy owns parts of England, I own North Africa, Castille is split, Qasim Khanate is beating the Golden Horde, and the Byzantine's are being mildy successful.​
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Are you converting those African provinces ? :blink:
 
Ouch, those are quite the hurdles. Those Burgundian troops are above average, and it doesn't look like you will be optimizing your troops soon. So go ahead and colonize at a steady pace. I'll be following, so keep up the good work!
 
Very impressive work with Portugal; will you be able to inherit them as cores (are they the same culture group?)

Keep up the good work!
 
yeah , keep expanding your overseas holdings , i'm sure you have enough cogs to bring tariffs home (what else to transport the loots?)
 
You're doing very well! Especially since Castille beat you very badly in the beginning.
 
Are you converting those African provinces ? :blink:
Nope, I have no missionaries!
Ouch, those are quite the hurdles. Those Burgundian troops are above average, and it doesn't look like you will be optimizing your troops soon. So go ahead and colonize at a steady pace. I'll be following, so keep up the good work!
Yes sir! Also, Burgundy is becoming quite a problem, though it looks like they'll lost the next election.
Very impressive work with Portugal; will you be able to inherit them as cores (are they the same culture group?)

Keep up the good work!
Yes, they are, so free cores! And thanks!
Nice update, keep up the mediocrity
Thanks you, can do!
yeah , keep expanding your overseas holdings , i'm sure you have enough cogs to bring tariffs home (what else to transport the loots?)
Im at about half my naval force limit, I can't build more because I just took.. well... you'll see.
You're doing very well! Especially since Castille beat you very badly in the beginning.
Thanks! I usually just rage after defeats, so doing this well feels pretty good.
 
How to be completely mediocre at managing save games Part 2.
Hi guys, but I lost the save for this update. Please disregard it, and just pretend the next update takes place after the previous one.
How to be Completely Mediocre in Divine Wind Part 6​

Hello everyone, and welcome back to another round of watch homy_dog ruin Aragon's economy.
To start things off this time, let's take 2 loans, and then lose 200 ducats. Happy days! I also hire an adviser so the interest isn't so bad, but he's not helping out a WHOLE lot.
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Next I declare war on Castille. Don't mind the truce in this screenshot, I just missed taking it at the time, and felt like it was sorely needed in this update.
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I am easily able to steamroll Castille, and their French allies, as well as Scotland and England. My heir dies, but is immediately replaced by a new, less skilled one. Meh.
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Castille accepts our peace offer soon after. I get 4 provinces for 4 infamy. Thank you excommunicated ruler!
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Soon after, I gain 2 new French vassals. The more the merrier, eh?
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I repay one of my loans! Now my economy is actually starting to do well again...
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Of course, Burgundy just has to rush in and ruin the fun...
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I make a slider change to quality, in hopes that it will help me in some way.
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Of course, people are too busy looking at the sky to pay heed to the looming war...
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I peace out with Switzerland(remember that one province I took from them for Savoy a long time ago?), cause I vassalized them!
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I lose both of my armies in Africa to Burgundy, leaving me with just 3 armies in Europe. Luckily the Burgundians are cowards, and we settle the war for a white peace.
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I cancel my current mission, because I lost my casus belli on Navarra a while ago. Now I must annex Armagnac. Good luck to me with this infamy. Oh well...
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A map of the known world: Noteworthy since last time: Dat Polotsk and Montenegro.
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A map of me and my vassals, along with my ridiculously high infamy(it's actually not that ridiculous...)
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My economic situation: My economy is picking up, yet I still have 1 more loan to pay off. I have to keep my troops funded to fight rebels, and I need my colonies to grow.
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My revolt risk: Pretty bad in Africa, elsewhere, not so bad. My war exhaustion is at 4, but that will lower quickly.
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I decide to embrace the counter-reformation, and check out my tech levels. They suck compared to everyone else's, especially Burgundy's land tech 15. Also, my ideal slider are fully Centralized, Aristocracy, Free Subjects, Mercantilism, and Quality. I could go either innovative or narrowminded; and I like to keep land/naval and offensive/defensive in the middle.
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Until next time, folks. Probably not tomorrow, because I'll probably be playing some tf2 or Fallout 1, which I just got with Fallout 2 for 6 bucks.
Anyways, until next time!​
 
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I would watch out for that Montenegro: They could destroy and conquer the Ottomans :eek:hmy: !

But yes, kicking up your feet and letting the infamy cool off is what I would do. After that, conquer Iberia in the name of mediocracy :p
 
I can't get over how weird/cool Provençal Bretagne is. :D
 
You should always go Naval as a coloniser, Defensive is superior to Offensive other than certain situations in the early game and definately go Narrowminded, if you don't need to westernise avoid innovative like the plague, narrowminded offsets the stab costs of free subjects and gives missionaries which are absolutely necessary for maintaining stab in a conquest heavy game.
 
That awkward moment when you lose your savegame... again. Sorry guys, but I totally didnt save or something after the last update. So now I'm back at the end of the old one. Hopefully this time I won't have to take 2 loans.
 
I would watch out for that Montenegro: They could destroy and conquer the Ottomans :eek:hmy: !

But yes, kicking up your feet and letting the infamy cool off is what I would do. After that, conquer Iberia in the name of mediocracy :p
Yes, same strategy after this replacement, as well.
I can't get over how weird/cool Provençal Bretagne is. :D
Yeah... too bad I derped up.
Yeah Provence in Bretagne ! Maybe the sun will shine here for a change!
*sigh* Yeah right lol
You should always go Naval as a coloniser, Defensive is superior to Offensive other than certain situations in the early game and definately go Narrowminded, if you don't need to westernise avoid innovative like the plague, narrowminded offsets the stab costs of free subjects and gives missionaries which are absolutely necessary for maintaining stab in a conquest heavy game.
Yeah ok, that's what I was thinking, but I am mediocre, so you never know...
 
How to Completely Mediocre in Divine Wind Part 6 (again, *sigh*)​

Hello all, and welcome back to another rousing update of the most mediocre gameplay you will ever see.
To start things off, I want to apologize for losing my last savegame(and the previous update, as well), and I was also disappointed that awesome Provence died, so I decided that a picture of a pony would cheer all of us up.
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But let's face it. As much as I would like it to be, this AAR is not about ponies. It is about Aragon, and its mediocre controller, so without further ado, I give you the first thing I do upon my return.
I cancel my mission, and get one that has been haunting me for a while now, so that's just great... I should really get some more ducats.
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The next thing I do is attack Castille. This should be an easy war.
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This brings in a few of their allies, but I take care of them easily, gain 2 vassals, and set Castille back a couple provinces.
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After doing this, I realize I have a ne province decision available, and decide to go ahead and do it, seeing as it gives me lowered revolt risk, and higher efficiency ratings. A win for me!
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BUT, even greater things are happening. The thorn in my side, the bug in my dinner, the arrow in me knee, Burgundy, is no longer the emperor. Huzzah!
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I celebrate by getting some new troop types. More morale here I come!
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I decide to attack before the new emperor can build troops. I strike at excommunicated Provence, hoping to gain a new vassal or 2.
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The war is easily won, and I gain 2 new vassals as well. Oh happy days!
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EPIC WIN OF EPIC PROPORTIONS No further comment necessary.
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That is where I leave you, dear readers, and remember, sometimes accidentally forgetting to save your game can be a good thing.
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Goodbye.​
 
*ode to joy playing* PUS ARE MADE OF WIN!
Was going to happen eventually but this soon seems awesome. Using PUs makes you less mediocre than me(maybe I should make a AAR myself to show how mediocre I AM)
 
GO FOR TOTAL DOMINANCE OF AFRICA.

YES, WE KNOW THE WHOLE CONTINENT IS LESS VALUABLE THAN THE CARRIBEAN ISLANDS. DON'T CARE.

TAKE IT ALL FOR MOTHER ARAGON.

Also, on a somewhat more serious note, never tag-jump to spain. not much in it for you, and your current color is SO much prettier than the gross bright yellow you get as spain.
 
*ode to joy playing* PUS ARE MADE OF WIN!
Was going to happen eventually but this soon seems awesome. Using PUs makes you less mediocre than me(maybe I should make a AAR myself to show how mediocre I AM)
Yep! I <3 it when I do stupid things that turn out ok.
GO FOR TOTAL DOMINANCE OF AFRICA.

YES, WE KNOW THE WHOLE CONTINENT IS LESS VALUABLE THAN THE CARRIBEAN ISLANDS. DON'T CARE.

TAKE IT ALL FOR MOTHER ARAGON.

Also, on a somewhat more serious note, never tag-jump to spain. not much in it for you, and your current color is SO much prettier than the gross bright yellow you get as spain.
But... Spain gives you free cores AND a base tax gain. It must be accepted. IT MUST. Also, taking Africa is not a good idea right now.
 
How to be Completely Mediocre in Divine Wind Part 7​

Hello errybody, and welcome back to another "skillful" update.
I start things off this time by canceling my mission, and receiving a new one to vassalize Navarra. This is good, because now I can have more friends!
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I take a move towards narrowminded, because I really hate having high stab cost and revolt risk.
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However, if one wants to make friends, you have to play a little rough at first. So I declare war on Navarra. Castille and Foix join the war.
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I receive event moves to both Aristocracy and to Mercantilism(Please note that I now also have a CoT in Andalusia as well as Barcelona). I receive an upgrade in land tech as well. WE are closing in on Burgundy, who is currently at around land tech 16.
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After handily beating my enemies, Navarra and Foix become my vassals, while Castille is just "weakened" some more. I really need a better casus belli on them.
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I change my troop type to landshncekten Infantry(Or something like that). These troops can easily defeat most attackers towards them, but have some trouble defending.
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I build an embassy in Leon, to stimulate my infamy growth(and by growth I mean loss).
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I reach government tech 11, and take Colonial Ventures, so that I can build many colonies before Scotland and Scandinavia start to colonize.
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Of course, Burgundy hates us, so they attack us. All of my vassals from Switzerland to Foix were completely occupied at one point during this war, but I fought them back, and eventually "lost" 25 ducats to them.
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I am glad that being patient and not just going out and assaulting random provinces is a good strategy. My old one kinda sucked.
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And so, I leave you all here. I have expanded my colonies, and gained a few vassals, but not much has changed. Hopefully I can do something to fix that.
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Also, the world is very... odd.
Giant Kazakh and Nogai. Scandinavia. Successful Scotland, Utrecht, Polotsk, and Qasim Khanate. Also, weirdly stretched Bohemia and Ryazan.
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Until next time, folks.