@Kazmir: Well, it's three updates now. Better get cracking!
@mayorqw: But the emperor is a Greek! Everybody in Korchev hates Greeks! It might be a good idea to get some additional protection, though, you're right. And I'll keep an eye out for any single Knytling princesses.
@Fookison: Welcome aboard! Since my characters have a tendency to ramble on if unchecked I'm glad to hear that the humor/words ratio is just right.
Episode 8 - A Well-Executed Plan
as told by Rostislav Vladimirovich Rurikovich
Is everybody here?
Good.
Now, Kirill, what was so important that it couldn't wait until after I had led my victorious army in triumph through the city?
"Mylord, do you remember the mission you sent me on, to the Doux Theodoros of Cherson's lands?"
Of course, you were to... well, 'stir up trouble' was the phrase I used, I believe.
"Indeed. And I have had great success."
You did? Like what? Did you get the Fishermans' Union to strike or something?
"Far better. I managed to...
convince certain people close to the Doux that he should not tolerate the oppressive rule of the current Emperor anymore. They have been filling his ears with arguments towards open rebellion and have almost succeeded."
You mean, he is about to raise his banner against his liege?
"Any day now. But that is not all. Do you want to take it from here, Spymaster Yeremey?"
"Yeah, thanks, K-Man. So, while the man Kirill here was working the Doux,
my agents were looking around among his subjects for those willing to support the real lord of all of Taurica. In other words: you."
Did they find any?
"Yep. And not just any. Some real big shots, in fact. Barons, city councilmen. And we have reason to believe that, once the Doux turns on the top dog in Constantinople, others will abandon him as well."
I see. And once the Doux makes a move we'll attack?
"Yes, mylord. Everything is prepared. The levies will get a few days rest, but will not be disbanded, so they are ready immediately. And thanks to your successful campaign against the pagans we are also able to afford some mercenaries, if neccessary."
I must say, I'm impressed, gentlemen. You all showed great initiative, determination and teamwork, and worked for the good of the realm in my absence.
What do you think, son? Don't I have the best council this side of Constantinople?
"They have shown themselves to be surprisingly capable. I wouldn't have expected it from them, actually."
...
Remind me to give you a lesson on positive feedback later.
But now we wait.
...
Oh. That was quick.
The Doux... I mean,
former Doux of Cherson has set sail for Constantinople. I don't even know what exactly his pretext for rebellion is.
But I don't care.
Holy mother, may you hold your protecting hand over me and my sons and shelter us from harm. And Saint George, may you fill our hearts with courage and guide us to victory.
Hm, that reminds me.
Iakov! Did you ever finish that icon?
"Um, well, I..."
...
"Alright, here it is..."
...
"..."
This... this is terrible.
"I know."
It's so...
absolutely hideous. Associating this with Saint George might actually count as blasphemy. I can't even tell which one is him and which one the dragon.
"I'm sorry."
Every second I spent looking at it a little bit of my soul dies. And yet I can't look away.
"Yes. I told you painting wasn't my strong suit."
The understatement of the millenium.
"I'll just... burn it or something..."
Yes, please do.
Or, no.
Who knows, burning it might open the gates of hell or summon a demon.
Iakov, I charge you to travel to the end of the world and drop it off the edge.
"What?!"
It's the only way to be sure.
And wrap it in cloth while travelling, so nobody accidentally takes a look at it.
Now I need something to stave off the darkness that's enveloping my soul.
What?
It worked.
And this whole war thing's got me pretty excited anyway.
It's got Gytha excited as well, I can tell you.
Anyway, let's go!
Since my army is rather small I have hired a mercenary company to increase our numbers.
Why they look like an angry mob of dirty peasants with pitchforks?
Well, I took the cheapest one available.
They can close off a castle just fine, though.
If only through their smell.
Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more,
or close the wall up with our Russian dead!
Or rather, Pecheneg dead.
Could someone tell the mercenaries to go first?
Because they are such... great... warriors!
Yeah, make clear to them how much we admire their martial prowess and stuff.
And promise them some more virgins while you're at it.
Good.
The city is ours.
How far we have come!
Who would have thought but a year ago
that our moment of triumph would be this close.
...
I have no words.
It's just... so beautiful.
Excuse me, I have something in my eye.
any more of a sissy? You know, apart from the fact that he is rapidly turning into a well-known and successful general? Still, real men don't cry, am I right? Guys? No? Well, we'll see how tough Rostislav
.