What Crusader Kings 2 taught me

Salik

Geologist

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Aug 10, 2001

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #41

dustbiter said:

Religious mentor can give a child homosexual trait.

Click to expand...

I always feel just a little uneasy when I send my children to be brought up by my fat, elderly bishop.

 

Dearmad

Lt. General

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Feb 16, 2001

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #42

naggy said:

When imprisoning your pregnant wife, everyone will think you are magnanimous for letting the newborn out of the dungeon 9 months later.

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That the baby is in prison is BRILLIANT! I love that engine handles that properly!

Salik said:

I always feel just a little uneasy when I send my children to be brought up by my fat, elderly bishop.

Click to expand...

Only just a little?

Wow most of the posts in here, while purporting to be humorous and unlikely, aren't too far from reality- the interpersonal crap/murders/jealousies,odd relationships, etc. all ring as totally true if you just know which historical story to reference.

 

aphrochine

War Plan Orange Member

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May 19, 2005

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #43

That your liege's champion is obviously your 19 year old heir with 27 Diplo and 4 Martial...the champion he chooses to lead his 35 knight charge against 20,000 muslims at Jaffa.

 

Syls

Sergeant

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Oct 7, 2009

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #44

Your 2 years old son will take great offense to you changing your succession law from Gavelkind to Primogeniture.

 

RedRooster81

Modding Paladin

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Feb 16, 2010

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #45

Never fight a land war in Asia.

Never fight a land war in Russia.

My naval superiority means naught. Well not yet anyway. There are static modifiers for naval combat, so maybe this rule will change soon.

 

naggy

Field Marshal

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Oct 23, 2003

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #46

2 year old? Try 2 day old!

 

RedRooster81

Modding Paladin

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Feb 16, 2010

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #47

naggy said:

2 year old? Try 2 day old!

Click to expand...

"I hate you, Daddy. You just passed high crown authority and agnatic seniority! WAAAHHHH!"

 

Viking

Godfather of Forts

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Jan 21, 2001

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #48

Rambo said:

Your entire family hates you and wants to kill you, even your 2 year old son/brother.

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Serves your right for sleeping with your mother.

 

Viking

Godfather of Forts

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Jan 21, 2001

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #49

DrLulz said:

Every King is King Henry VIII.
While some new Kings worked hard at goals like securing a place in heaven, or becoming famous, nearly all the more established Kings passed their time killing spouses. Then remarrying, then killing the spouse again.

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I've gotten the impression that they are more like Henry II Anjou where constant goading from his wife the richest woman in europe (ambitious -50) gave him 4 sons, 1 dead, 1 gay, 1 dead with an ambitious heir and 1 craven tyrant.

 

Solo?

Major

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May 6, 2005

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #50

That the Seljuks were responsible for keeping unruly and rebellious Byzantine Dukes inline by declaring a holy war on any breakaway duchies and dutifully handing the culprit and his territory over to their Orthodox friends once they'd conquered the rebels strongholds.

Also, and I'm sure it's already been mentioned, that France completed the Reconquista (la Récupération?) of Iberia in the 12 century.

 

Last edited: Feb 22, 2012

PureBeef

Second Lieutenant

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Feb 27, 2009

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #51

Ethnicity is not determined by your parents but by who educates you.

 

naggy

Field Marshal

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Oct 23, 2003

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #52

PureBeef said:

Ethnicity is not determined by your parents but by who educates you.

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Not ethnicity - culture. Look at what happens with kids adopted at a very young age from Asia - they're pretty much American.

 

Taghan

Second Lieutenant

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Feb 14, 2012

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #53

Everything's useless except Stewardship.

 

unmerged(104812)

Captain

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #54

That when you managed to engineer inheriting everything the strongest and most annoying duchy in your kingdom the duchess that rules it will live to be 83 and hate you the whole time. Kept thinking why kill her she'll kick the bucket any day now.

 

PureBeef

Second Lieutenant

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Feb 27, 2009

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #55

naggy said:

Not ethnicity - culture. Look at what happens with kids adopted at a very young age from Asia - they're pretty much American.

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I realize that, but the photo they use the characters end up looking like an ethnic person of that culture (i.e. Swedish born Caucasian child ends up having dark skin and black curly hair).

 

naggy

Field Marshal

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Oct 23, 2003

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #56

PureBeef said:

I realize that, but the photo they use the characters end up looking like an ethnic person of that culture (i.e. Swedish born Caucasian child ends up having dark skin and black curly hair).

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True...

 

unmerged(184215)

Sergeant

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Dec 18, 2009

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #57

That once you go brown you never go back.

 

A

Actinguy

Major

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #58

That the fine upstanding Christians of Iberia LOVE slashing the throats of their newborn nieces and nephews.

 

Julyan

First Lieutenant

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Aug 26, 2010

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #59

That women are shallow and will take great offense if their (male) liege is ugly.

 

unmerged(450592)

Second Lieutenant

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Feb 14, 2012

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• Feb 22, 2012

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• #60

Never ever give land to your brothers.
And under no circumstances marry an intelligent woman with high intrigue.

Also after playing CK2 for a week I'm sure I should convince my sister to matrilinearly marry her fiance, to spread the dynasty ;-)

 

Last edited: Feb 22, 2012