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Thread: What Crusader Kings 2 taught me

  1. #181
    The Article Beggar Derahan's Avatar
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    That actully the Byzantine Empire was not Orthodox but it was Bogomilist...always

  2. #182
    Colonel Pyriel's Avatar
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    It's a proven fact in history that 80 year old men and women who have been married since they were 16 will quickly turn to homosexuality after fathering and birthing 14 kids.
    “It's now very common to hear people say, 'I'm rather offended by that.' As if that gives them certain rights. It's actually nothing more... than a whine. 'I find that offensive.' It has no meaning; it has no purpose; it has no reason to be respected as a phrase. 'I am offended by that.' Well, so what.” - Stephen Fry.

  3. #183
    First Lieutenant TinMann's Avatar
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    Surround yourself with geniuses, but in the name of all that is holy - don't marry one.

  4. #184
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    Manzikert was easily preventable; on the way to Armenia, all Romanos needed to do was gather a few hundred more untrained city youths for his army.

  5. #185
    That a firstborn son who embodies all seven virtues will still plan his father's assassination.

  6. #186
    Quote Originally Posted by nicholas2000 View Post
    That a firstborn son who embodies all seven virtues will still plan his father's assassination.
    Yeah.

  7. #187
    Modding Paladin RedRooster81's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nicholas2000 View Post
    That a firstborn son who embodies all seven virtues will still plan his father's assassination.
    He is humble before the Pope who wants him to install papal investiture once daddy's gone; chaste to his wife; kind to the beggar outside the gate; charitable in involving his brothers in the plot; patient in waiting for just the right moment; diligent in going over the plan five times; and generous to his personal assassins. One man's vices are another man's virtues, my friend. :P

  8. #188
    That my mother is going to spend the last 20 years of her life trying to kill all my children, whilst being my strongest supporter

  9. #189
    First Lieutenant TinMann's Avatar
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    You can't make your primary heir a Bishop (and therefore remove him from successon), but someone else can.


    My heir decided to work as an officer of one of my Dukes, who later appointed him as a bishop. Totally hosed me!
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  10. #190
    Alférez Tengri's Avatar
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    That sometimes, assassinating your grandchildren is the only option you have.

  11. #191
    Contrary to what I learned in school, every tin pot, piss poor, Irish chieftain (sorry, Earl) was actually perfectly positioned to conquer the British Isles and, from there, dominate all of Europe. In reality, we must have just not WANTED it enough.

  12. #192
    The best way to rule a large kingdom is to keep a majority of your vassals in prison

  13. #193
    First Lieutenant TinMann's Avatar
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    Your wife will still help you manage your demesne from prison.

  14. #194
    Assassinating a pregnant woman WILL make you feel bad... until you inherit her former husband's duchy next generation.

  15. #195
    First Lieutenant TinMann's Avatar
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    That sociopathic behavior (plotting to kill your wife, your enemy's offspring, and everyone else for that matter) the best way to get ahead in the middle ages.

    On that note, Niccolò Machiavelli's The Prince serves as an excellent instruction manual for the game.

  16. #196
    Colonel Pyriel's Avatar
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    The Holy Roman Emperor around 1302-1324 was a mongol until he was burned on the stake by cathar heretics.
    “It's now very common to hear people say, 'I'm rather offended by that.' As if that gives them certain rights. It's actually nothing more... than a whine. 'I find that offensive.' It has no meaning; it has no purpose; it has no reason to be respected as a phrase. 'I am offended by that.' Well, so what.” - Stephen Fry.

  17. #197
    Major Game Slut Anthropoid's Avatar
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    Annual seasonal climatic fluctuations are a recent result of global warming, which must have started sometime just before Napoleon's Winter march; during the middle ages it was consistently balmy and temperate throughout Europe and the Near East, and sieging armies could campaign all year round without impediment (even in northern Norway!).
    Rising from Count to Duke, how I did it:
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  18. #198
    Always keep some money in store in case you get excommunicated. Powerful king with lots of people hating him + excommunication = trouble...big trouble

  19. #199
    Sergeant oPatJRo's Avatar
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    Even if you have 30 martial skill, you still walking out of tournament with -100 prestige
    Last edited by oPatJRo; 11-04-2012 at 10:38. Reason: previus post is a bit inappropiate

  20. #200
    It's perfectly normal for a 80 year old king with no martial skill to win first, second and third place in a tournament.

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