War Resumes!
Skirmish in the North provokes a new campaign against the Dastardly Junta!
Colonial Army Regiments on the march to the battlefield
The writers and editors of this publication were among the crowd watching in awe on the pavements and gazing from windows as Colonial Army regiments march north through our fair city of Fair Wind, the provincial captial of the Outer Falkands, the location of our central offices, and formerly known by the Argies as 'Buenos Aires'. The Falklander regiments were the first of this great column, naturally. They were resplendent in their red uniforms and white ivory helmets, their black boots finely polished and their rifles cooly laid on their shoulders. They marched with a great of precison and discipline that can only be the result of their birth. The newly raised Argentine regiments followed them. They were somewhat more shabby, though this comes as no surprise. They were dressed in similar clothing to the earlier regiments, although donned with a brown cap or helmet instead of a ivory helm, to differentiate themselves from their Falklander comrades. Though their formation was less trained, and their manner more rough, they certainly seemed more professional than many of the Argentine soliders of the past. The source of this is evidently the stalwart work of their Falklander officers, who have trained and maintaned them to rigirous, proper military standards. 'We've made true men of them over the past months.' said one of the officers, who stopped to answer our questions. 'Yet we must wait to see if their posture is retained when fighting against their old countryman.' Wishing him luck in the battles to come, he returned to his regiment.
This whole business has been set off by a large skirmish that occurred several days ago in the Great Salt Mountains, which form a key part of our Armistice border with the Junta. Junta guerrillas and soldiers launched an attack on a army garrison nestled deep within the hilly countryside surrounding the Mountains. Taken by surprise, the regiments were spilt apart by the shock and speed of the Junta assault, and there were numerous casualties before the army was able to recover, regroup and launch a counter-attack that sent the Junta troops running. Estimates and reports put our dead at around two hundred, with twice that number wounded. This blatant act of aggression that completely broke our armistice with them has naturally led many to call for the Junta's heads.
The garrison valiantly resist jeopardy from the Junta's forces
Yesterday morning, the Governor finally received word of the battle. Reports from inside Government House in Port Stanley stated that 'the governor flew into such a rage in such that several pieces of furniture and crockery were destroyed.' Several hours later, he once more took to the square of Port Stanley to announce the end of the armistice treaty with the Junta; by personally tearing the very treaty itself in twain. He then followed this with a bold declaration of war penned to the Governments of Paraguay and Bolivia, which was latter telegraphed to their respective embassies. He citied constant and 'openly aggressive' support for the Junta through weapons, funds and volunteers. Indeed, he claimed that both nation's governments had been covertly infiltrated by the Junta, so much so that the difference between their states were superficial. In his own words, 'Those Diego bastards are all in league against our Dominion, and we will not tolerate the continued aggression against our Falklander and Argentine citizens.' After his passionate, three hour speech, he stepped down to allow General Garnet Wolseley, Commander-in-Chief of the Falklands Colonial Army, to announce and give detail on a new, bold campaign against the Junta, that plans to utilise the Falkland's greatly expanded manpower (achieved by the Argentine Regiment reforms) to smash the prominent standing armies of our three new enemies.
And so, several hours later, we return to the streets of Fair Wind. Most of the regiments have past now, yet many more, no doubt, will follow them in the coming days. Regiments from across our Dominon are being raised, levied and redeployed to the north from Patagonia and The Falkands, and they will inevitably pass through our city for supplies, information, and the support of our patriotic populace. The return of war has once more lightened the flame of patriotism among us Falklanders, as many eagerly await the final ruination of our grave Junta rivals, and the victory of our Dominon over the Diegos who have resisted our tide of modernisation, progress and civilisation. So, from all of us here at the Daily Telegraph,
God Save our soldiers, God Save the Falklands, and God Save the Queen!
Orders:
Invade the Bolivia-esque province to my north with Five armies
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