Chapter Eighteen - Unboliviable
As Sokoto's armed forces have acquitted themselves surprisingly well over the last few years, Sokoto's officers are left rather annoyed when professionalism is nonetheless forced upon the army, research into 'Army Professionalism' completed in April.
The officers remain convinced that giving the troops proper training is a hugely foolish idea. This especially true as Sokot soldiers are already taught how to salute, mount suicidal charges, march, walk directly into cannon fire, fire their weapons and inflict high levels of friendly fire casaulties. How professional training can surpass this current amateur training is beyond them.
In order to show the world what an industrial powerhouse Sokoto has become, the government order for 'Experimental Railroad' to be researched next. 'Experimental' certainly the right word here as Sokoto's academics are currently attempting to make railroad tracks from rotten vegetables, hole ridden wood and brackish water. They are optimistic that said experiments will prove successful.
[I was not truly wishing to bother with any industrial tech at present but my hand was forced due to my own ridiculous stupidity. In recruiting so many guard brigades in so short a space of time I completely ruined my economy. I went from a surplus of £400 per day to hemorrhaging money at an alarming rate. Even cutting back spending in numerous areas I was still losing a great deal of cash, eventually stabilising at making a loss of 'only' -£200 per day. I really have struggled with the extra supply consumption cost on very hard difficulty, it makes balancing the economy far more difficult. Anyway, ruining the economy was far from my only major blunder during this update.]
The government is left hugely confused a few weeks later as they learn that Argentina has surrendered to Chile, handing over the province of Tucuman.
This despite Chile having no war score in her favour and no armed forces left with which to fight Argentina after Sokoto rushed to Argentina's aid and 'rescued' her from the warmongering Chile. With such an impressive display of ineptness Sokoto's government hurriedly begin attempting to hire Argentina's diplomats, who are clearly masters of diplomacy.
Having handed over a large chunk of her land for no reason whatsoever there is little surprise when Argentina is declared bankrupt a day later.
There is even less suprise when the Sokot National Bank admits to having given a large loan to Argentina. With the discovery that Sokoto's nemesis, the Ottomans, have also been given far more cash over the last few years, the finance minister is quickly applauded for his great work.
As support for war remains inexplicably low in Sokoto the government is forced into agreeing an overly lenient peace deal with Argentina.
All the more lenient considering the war is currently heavily in Sokoto's favour and Argentina seem happy to give her land away for no good reason at present, as shown by her peace deal with Chile. Unfortunately though the public has little appetite for war at present as for some reason matters such as the currently failing economy, the complete lack of democracy and the horrific inequality within the nation are considered more important issues.
[Here is massive blunder number two from this update, as will soon become apparent.]
Despite the distinct lack of enthusiasm for war at present the government does what it does best, completely ignoring the will of the public, as the diplomats are sent forth barely a week later.
The diplomats return several months later oddly wrapped in bandages. This due to their Egyptian counterparts insisting they accept the 'honour' of mummification after they delivered the decleration of war.
Egypt's meagre forces are soon crushed, allowing for Sokoto's troops to begin the horrifying business of besieging her lands. It is whilst Sokoto's troops are suffering horrific siege conditions that the government is given some startling news.
Prussia's war with Egypt instantly worries the government. If Prussia was to gain a direct border with Sokoto things could prove tense between both nations. Thankfully though the prospect of Prussia gaining a direct border with Sokoto looks disctinctly unlikely.
This because Prussia is demanding a region from Egypt, Farafra, which is entirely inaccessible to them unless they send troops accross barren, uncolonised wastelands. In failing to notice how inaccessible Farafra is, evidently Prussia have cartographers able to rival Sokoto's own in terms of their ability.
The government is left hugely shocked mere months later as it becomes clear that Sokoto's public still have little appetite for war.
This despite Sokoto defeating the mighty army of Egypt recently. This great feat something which the government had expected to improve support for war.
Rather than support war the most important issue for most of the public is that of voting reform. For some reason the fact that parliament is currently filled primarily with the rich and that parliament promotes and protects the interests of the rich over everyone else, does not sit well with the average dirt poor member of the public. Desperate to gain support for war, the government takes the drastic step of enacting voting reform.
Although the government makes sure to not go too far with said reform. Only members of the public with some assets, the middle class, are given the right to vote. It would be quite unthinkable to allow the common rabble to vote as well. They would likely do something ridiculous such as vote for a party other than the ruling, staunchly pro-upper class, Conservatives.
Unsurprisingly having enacted such sweeping democratic reform, which marginally dilutes the political power of the rich, Sokoto's public quickly become happy to support war once again.
[Here is major blunder number two. I had not noticed that Wealth Weighted Voting had become such a major issue for the nation, to the extent that it was keeping support for jingoism lower than it otherwise should be. As can be seen after passing the Weighted Wealth reform support for jingoism shot up. If I had but noticed this before ending my war with Argentina I would have had the jingoism necessary to gain yet more land from them. I truly am shockingly incompetent at this game.]
With Sokoto's economy still struggling the government decide that cuts must be made to the budget so as to stave off bankruptcy.
This the only option as it would be entirely unacceptable to instead increase the currently low taxes which the rich and middle class pay, as clearly the rich contribute more than enough. Instead a cut is made to national stockpile spending. Considering that Sokoto rarely engages in war and has but a small army to support, said cut should not prove too costly.
With Sokoto's troops now barely paid and only given minimal supplies the government decides that this is an excellent time to begin another war. The diplomats are sent forth.
The diplomats return a few days later looking surprisingly happy. For once they were treated with respect as their Bolivian counterparts were left hugely impressed by their uniforms. This little surprise as Bolivia is herself a highly fashionable nation which currently sports the same glorious pink for her map colour as Sokoto.
A month later and peace is agreed with Egypt.
Sokoto made sure to reward her comrade-in-arms in this war, Prussia, by taking the very land Prussia demanded. Sokoto is nothing if not an excellent ally.
Research into 'Experimental Railroad' comes to an end a few weeks later. Surprisingly rotten vegetables, hole ridden wood and brackish water proved poor material from which to create railroad tracks. Thankfully Sokoto's academics soon overcame this problem by instead using grass, string and brittle iron to make sturdy railroad tracks.
The academics are next ordered to begin research into the 'Practical Steam Engine'. The government believe such research should prove useful as Sokot engineers are currently unable to build working locomotives as they have no knowledge of how to construct a steam engine. This something of a slight problem as miles of the newly designed experimental railroad track is already being constructed without the locomotives available to use said track.
A month later the government decides that having conquered millions of people and gained control over vast swathes of land in the last few decades, it would be a good idea to hold a celebration to show the world how great Sokoto is.
Dignitaries from accross the world are invited to witness a grand parade to mark the occasion. There is then slight surprise when the parade instead turns into a protest. The many non-Hausa people Sokoto has conquered in the last few decades proving inexplicably unwilling to celebrate Sokoto's recent achievements.
A few weeks later, and memories of the protest quickly forgotten, the government is left very worried. With the swingeing cut made to stockpile spending the government is no longer able to afford supplying the army with much loved pink uniforms, Sokoto's soldiers having to instead make do with rather more mundane uniforms. Clearly this is likely to have an adverse effect on morale, the troops doubtless distraught at having lost their fashionable clothing. With such poor morale the government fears the army will face nothing but defeat against Bolivia.
Surprisingly morale actually rose dramatically when the troops were told they would no longer be supplied with pink uniforms. It almost as if they are glad to no longer be wearing pink.
With Bolivia's forces crushed and Sokoto's troops suffering through siege duty in Bolivia, the government receives the good news that Kuka is now fully colonised.
There is now a large and ever growing waiting list of Sokot citizens wishing to be chosen as participants in the next colonisation project in Darfur. For some reason ever increasing numbers of people remain desperate to leave Sokoto's poverty stricken, highly taxed, poorly governed states for life in the colonies. It almost as if the lower taxes and lessened government interference make colonial life better.
The government is left rather surprised and worried in August as they recieve news that a regiment in Ruwayshid is rather unhappy.
Quite why the colonial regiment is considering rebellion when it is barely paid, given minimal supplies and is led by some of Sokoto's highly competent and brilliant officers is a mystery.
As the war against Bolivia has been proceeding well, this due to Sokoto's troops desparetly attempting to bring fighting to an end before they completely run out of supplies, peace is soon agreed.
Sokoto's holdings in South America have grown considerably with this peace deal as Bolivia is left with a sole province, this happily allowing for yet more font to be added to the map. Of course Sokoto was completely justified in her warring with Bolivia, as she employed the much respected 'You Stole My Political Map Colour' casus belli.