Ireland's Teardrop

Avindian Yes, yes, only by Irish leadership did the Scots win! I have no immediate plan with the English, other than taking care that niether they, not the Scots get too powerful. That'll mean another 1-3 wars...

Malurous

Indeed, the English arrived first. They lost anyhow

Arakhor

Thanks for the cheering!

blsteen

You've outlined the plan masterfully! That's exactly what we're going to do.

loki100

There were two large English armies: the one we annihilated, and the one the Scots will annihilate soon in Lothian. There is a smaller stack somewhere, but that's not worth mentioning.

hoi2geek

Good advice! I'll certainly go after the Castillians, but for now I need them more than they need me.

Ashantai

Oh yes, lots of men lost, and a high WE. Luckily, we're rich enough from trade that I don't need to raise war taxes. That way, my WE is manageable, and with a high Adm monarch, I can actually reduce WE during war easily.

A note to all:

There will be no update today, and no update on Friday. I have my final oral examination on Friday, and I still need to prepare the presentation. So, next update will be on Monday. Sorry for the delay, I'll make up for it with a double update.

Thanks for reading, commenting, and/or following this. Much appreciated!

To all

Exam finished, and passed. Also with the grade I was secretly hoping for! I'll post the next update today, a bonus one tomorrow, and then I'm back on my regular Mo-Wed-Fri schedule.

Avindian

Thanks! At first I was very nervous, but after five minutes I was on "presentation autopilot" and everything went smoothly. Good thing I did all my lecturing duties and went to lots of conferences. They're good practice!

CivandEUIII

Oh yes, I'm not going to sit idly by and let the English stack regroup. But the war was won with that battle in the Cumbrian hills!

EktorGomes

Thank you, and I will tapestry everything, not carpet

Sethanon

Thank you for your kind words! Do try an Ireland game, they are fun. You might need a couple of re-starts (I needed five), because you need some luck and a suitably otherwise engaged Ireland. If you use the mission overhaul mod, England can't get the conquer Ireland mission on day one, so that saves you a few re-starts. England also cannot get that mission if it does not hold all English provinces at 1399 start. So if you get them to srelease a country or province, you're safe from that mission.

loki100

Thanks. Yes, it was a bit stressful, but then the beer afterwards tastes that much better!

Sweboy

Thanks, but that is not necessary, and also doesn't sound very Irish, eh?

Kerry

Oh, I don't know about the club... I see it like Groucho Marx: "I do not wish to enter any club that would accept me as a member"

Chapter 17: Second Battle of Cumbria


Cumbria falls after 108 days. We cannot afford any assaults.




This has left England with some time to regroup their forces, and hire a few mercenaries.




We manage to corner a large part of their remaining forces, again in Cumbria. Luckily, Charles I has decided that he is no longer fit for military command. Suits us: Geoffrey Braddock, the replacement general, is but a shadow of the king.




But the Irish military academies are not idle. The very best Ireland can offer, general Conn Keane is promoted. His tactics relying on musket fire are years ahead of technology. Historians will write what a fine general he would have made... if he were only born 100 years later.




The war is going well. Even though we're the only one left on our side. At least there are no alliance doctrines that can mess things up.




The old king dies in an tragic accident. He brutally stabs himself in the back with a quill while writing the realm's balance sheet for external investors to check. He is ceremoniously dropped in a cask of whiskey and Mathúin Martyn, the king's former scribe, succeeds him. Investors are pleased by Mathúin's knack for financial details.




Meanwhile, reports from our spies in England arrive. Charles I is still on the throne, and by now Brittany has decided that England is sufficiently weakened by our attacks that it's safe to declare war. Opportunists.




It is clear that England has lost this war. That green in Cornwall is not Irish sweet grayish-green, but yucky Portuguese I-was-here green. They also decided to attack their former allies England while everyone was having a go.




England desperately offers peace, but on terms that are too generous: We don't want all that BB!




We wait for England to sign a peace treaty with Brittany...




...and then tapestry the lands with our troops.




With England well and truly broken, we offer peace on our terms: Lancaster is ceded to Ireland (this province has a Northumbrian core, so we can sell it later to those backstabbing bastards). Northumbria is cut loose, and is no longer under the protection of England. Our next war will show them who's the boss! As a BB-free bonus, England agrees to drop their claims on a number of provinces, including the newly-lost Breton-English ones.




What will happen now that Northumbria is a valid target? Will Ireland descend upon those fake Yorkshiremen, or let them live? See for yourself, tomorrow on Ireland's Teardrop!

Avindian

That's what doctrines are for. But see for yourself, we have a new doctrine in the next update!

Chapter 18: Contumelious Northumbria



The will of the people has been made clear: Northumbria needs to be vassalised, to avenge the contumacious Yorkshiremen.




Mathúin Martyn points out that we still hold a truce with them, so it would be folly to attack immediately. The court, and the people do not listen. Instead, the mood discharges into a crisis. Or more a commotion, or traditional Irish ruckus.




Abhorred by all the violence, artists leave the country.




Suits them... by now we are the second riches country on earth. If the artists don't want our patronship, then so be it.




Just after the artists fled the country, Prince Martyn suffers from a terribly tragic accident. He is found dead in his art room, having accidentally strangled himself with a silk scarf. Cathaoir Dongan, the last remaining court artist and expert in silk colouring, steps up to take Martyn's place as Prince of the Realm.




With his bellicose attitude, Cathaoir sends a delegate to the pope. No longer shall the Roman-Catholic church have any say in the matters of Ireland, hundreds of miles away from Rome.




Cathaoir's second order of business is to declare war on Northumberland. They are guaranteed by England and Scotland, but Scotland is our ally. The Scottish diplomat personally guarantees us that Scotland will honour its alliance. So, nothing that could go wrong, eh?




Well, congratulations, Scotland, you just made it onto our list! The Scottish diplomats must have read too many of our secret Irish Alliance Doctrine papers. That, and the fact that the AI will always side with the defender, so no surprises here. We need to take down Scotland a notch as well anyway.




At least the Castillians are still on our side, and offer not barrels of whisky, but rather barrels of Port. A decent substitution.




But then, Britanny decides that it needs to enter the war on the side of the Northumbrians. How did these pesky Yorkshiremen manage to get so many friends with their backstabbing ways? This might be bad, that's one rather powerful country that we did not expect to fight!




And so, the war begins. Customary, the Irish expeditionary force is sounds trashed and beaten. It manages, again, only barely to retreat from the battlefields and back onto the waiting transport ships. Lost prestige, lost men, and high war exhaustion entails.




Can Ireland win this war? Will the combined might of Scotland, England, and Brittany prove too much? Can Ireland at least win a battle? Or is this the test for the Irish Fighting Doctrine, which states that you must lose the very first battle of every war? Be sure to check back tomorrow, for another update of Ireland's Teardrop!