Chapter 5: Calm before the Storm
28. December 1939
The morale in Wellington was low. The looming threat of the USA hung over the city like a Sword of Damocles. No happy chatting could be heard, no laughter of children playing. People went about their daily business silently, as if waiting for their impending doom. However there was one man in the city who wasn't depressed. In fact, he seemed quite cheerful!
"FREYYYYYYYYYYBERRRRRRRRRG!!!!!!"
Freyberg: Yes sir!
Savage: Freyberg, we've been quite lucky these past few months!
Freyberg: Because the USA still didn't attack us?
Savage: Exactly! I fully expected them to, actually. But it seems the dissent from our canceled NAP has taught them not to muck with us
Freyberg: I don't think they're exactly afraid of us...
Savage: Come on, who wouldn't be afraid of the incredible EMPIRE OF NEW ZEALAND?
Freyberg: Uhm... anyway, war has broken out in Europe. With our allies fighting for freedom and democracy the USA will now be reluctant to
actually attack us, because they'd be helping the Nazis.
Savage: Ha, freedom and democracy? Who needs those? We don't have it here in NZ and look at us, we're pretty awesome
Freyberg: o
Savage: In any case, time is of the essence! While the USA is unwilling to pick us up right now, that can change at any minute. We have to exploit this opportunity to grab as much land as we can before it finally happens. Freyberg, show me the plans.
Savage: That looks pretty straightforward. Get it - wait, what? Is it me or are some of your soldiers already standing in Uruguay?
Freyberg: Yeah, sorry about that. While I was moving the army to Argentinia, I got lost and accidentially marched through Uruguay
Savage: Oho... very nice indeed Freyberg! You sure know how to please me
Now off you go, and conquer some more!
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Wasting no time, Freyberg sends the defenders into retreat...
... and ruthless Carr kills them before they can escape.
Carr: Kill and maim, that's my name
Freyberg: I don't think that's a name Carr...
Carr: Tightass
The advance is in full swing, and soon Carr has slaughtered the bulk of the Argentinian "army".
With no enemy to attack on the ground, Carr gangs up with the British on the Argentinian Navy.
Carr: Gang-Bang bitches
Freyberg: Watch your language Carr!
This AAR is supposed to have a teen rating!!
And so, only one month after the beginning of hostilities, Argentinia is already beaten.
The annexation would have to wait another month though:
Freyberg: What's the deal with bloody South America!? Every country has some province that is completely in the middle of nowhere! My horse is fricking tired!
Freyberg: Finally...