Things I've Learned from Victoria 2

[enf91]

That Ben Franklin didn't discover electricity. Government did around 1880.
That Canada never gained independence from the UK, and Northern Maine still belongs to the UK.
That cottage industries could make machine parts anytime, but no one thought to make it into a major industry until the government discovered the technology.
That the US could have avoided the Civil War by abolishing slavery. UPDATE That the American Civil War was inevitable.
That nothing was discovered without initial government investment, and the government could research only one thing at a time (also a lesson from Civilization).
China exists as a buffer zone between Russian Siberia and British India.
That Garibaldi had nothing to do with Italian unification. Good ol' ass-whuppin' did.
That finding the source of the Nile was not possible on the first expedition. (read the event files if you don't believe me)
That Germany couldn't be formed without either taking the crown from the gutter or by the North German Confederation.

[Hardcore_gamer]

*The world heads towards bigger technological disparity because no matter how many people use automobiles, you still have to research them from scratch.

*My years of studying economy were just waste of time, because apparently subsidizing anything will make you no.1 economic powerhouse

*19th century trade was done with one and only goal in mind. To satisfy all the needs of those people who discovered the superior power of romantic literature.

*All the paintings about Napolenic wars are wrong, because it is clearly impossible for cuirrassiers to be there.

*Gold may make people rich, but whenever drop of oily black liquid is found, people stop caring about it and welcome the greasy poverty of drilling.

The fact that a real economist is pointing out how flawed the economy in Victoria 2 is is pretty sad.

Anyways.
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*That no matter how rich your capitalists are, they will always lose their money in one way or the other.

*That Railroads are the world's single most valuable type of building.

*That you don't have to pay attention to your nation's economy because it is either saved or screwed no matter what you do.

[Emperor Walter]

That after Germany won the Franco-Prussian war, France fought 6 more wars in an attempt to gain Alsace-Lorraine. After the failure of all of them, Republican rebels seized control of France and instituted a Dictatorship. Austria became the most stable state in the early 19th century due to the rapid assimilation of all minorities. Following the governments humiliating loss to germany in several brothers wars, Russia and every other state invaded, while Austrians rebelled, demanding an independent Czechoslovakia and Hungary despite the fact that all czechs and hungarians had long since disappeared. Austria thereafter disintegrated by 1870 and was no longer considered a great power.

[keynes2.0]

That industrialization generally resulted in falling living standards as people lost their cushy lives as serfs where they could afford even luxuries and took to starvation en masse as factory workers. Why they would do this remains a mystery.

[TekcoR]

1) That Denmark is a whipping boy of the Germanic people (Prussia or Austria).
2) That Russia likes the Ottoman Empire region of Kars, always declaring war within one year from the start.
3) Brazil is a super power and nobody dares intervene in its affairs.
4) Burma is conquered by China nearly every game.
4b) Burma is liberated by Britain shortly after wards and becomes British!

[Saintis]

*That by 1935 Asia consisted of the UK, Korea and Japan (Basically), and that 75% of Africa was Korean.

*That building two cement factories in Sicily can destroy the world's economy.

[Tanzhang (譚張)]

* The Boers in landlocked Transvaal knew more about shipbuilding than the Greeks

* China did not invent paper money

* Freedom of Trade is worth more in principle rather than in practice

* There weren't any slaves in Africa in 1836, but there were slaves in Cambodia.

[Forgiven]

telesien/Hardcore_gamer: That either of you believe whatever your economy studies/other economists tell you, tsk...
...yes, subsidizing does make industry flourish, every nation that has industry has done it, and probably still does, but it's just hidden better nowdays.
No, it's not a healthy industry, but, ah well...

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* Over half of worlds coffee came from Java in mid 19th century (I though it couldn't be, but apparently it's at least close to truth, found source saying 'over third' damn me for finding out things that are actually true)

* Capitalists and Aristocrats were frequent fliers past 1880.

* That, sadly, lot of people don't bother to check their facts before making their, still humorous, contributions =)

[KonradRichtmark]

That Socialists want every social reform they can get, but refuse to support extending the voting franchise to the working class. No, those social reforms have to be granted by the Almighty Kaiser, we're not going to give ourselves the power to vote them in!

[Krautkopf]

* When Cuba gained independance from Israel, they destroyed all factories as they do not know of the combustion engine.

This is my favourite one *g*

[Sortulv]

When one buys German rifles, you only get the good new bolt action rifles if you have discovered how to make them yourself. If you only know how to make flintlock rifles, the Germans will deliver that.

[crunox]

*Factories never close and become national monuments
*You can borrow money without paying back
*The older you get the more life will slow down, and if you are old enough it seems you go back in time
*WW1 never happend
*If you are out of money you can say cash and get 5k on your bank account
*Wallionian is primary culture in Belgium and Flemish secondary
*USA actually lose the civil war with the help of russia and mexico in 1880

[coola567]

Even though Karl Marx was "invented" communism and/or socialism wasn't

[lizardo]

Things I have learned.

* Proficiency with clicking dialog boxes is more important than strategy in advancing the history of the world and avoiding disaster.
* Precognition is an important talent to have or skill to learn when clicking anytime during the run of a paradox game (see 1) else disaster is inevitable.
* All political movements and social change are the result of random supernatural responses to improbable events (see 1).
* After being overwhelmed by said events said supernatural beings become apathetic and ignore all events that they are not forced to respond to (see 1).
* That after apathy comes rage at being damned to respond to meaninglessly trite and trivial events to appease the event god (see 1).
* Democracies and Dictatorships are indistinguishable.
* If you put a horse on a train it (the train) will move at the speed of the horse.
* You will eat more hamburgers more often and the components of your vehicle will rot faster in geometric proportion to your distance from the take out window (must be vista).
* Armies changing sides because of civil war will step out of column and meekly fall on their swords.
* The American civil war will end in six months as it is over run and quickly occupied by well placed Union troops who have prepared years in advance for the opportunity.
* Americans can vote in national elections every year until they get a party that they don't hate. Or hate less than the others. But it still ignores all pending legislation unless submitted by some supernatural unseen leader.
* While no one has ever built a printer or newspaper, we have the option to shut them down if they ever do .
* Capitalists exist to spend money on railroads. It's more fun that watching army ants eat a locust.
* If you build a railroad at the edge of town you can not build a port in the harbor.
* I can spend decades researching irrelevant technologies everyone else knows, then buy build and destroy all the primitive rails in order until thirty years later I have what everyone else has because they finally ran out of new things to research. But I still don't know why I did this instead of paying one of their stupid capitalists to build a modern rail for me 30 years ago.
* I learned that instead of training my troops to elite levels I should execute them and raise a whole new army of raw recruits that know how march in pretty clothes and drink wine instead of moonshine.
* I can learn a new tech and all my units and factories will instantly know and be able to use that technology and all my existing stocks and arms will magically upgrade.
* If I run faster I can get in front of a retreating army running for its life and be dug in and waiting for it in its crib.
* I never get tired of doing that.
* Capitalists believe that, if there are no railroads to build, throwing money at random projects in random locations is fun.
* Capitalists are too stupid to borrow from the bank not realizing how much more random fun they could have with OPM.
* State Capitalism regimes believe that they should build everything everywhere all the time.
* Even if you have no coal mine or access to the sea you must, and more amazingly can, learn all about these things.
* Prices look pretty when plotted graphically and no one cares what anything costs.
* Send your minions to kill hobbits early and often (yes, I know, but why take the chance?).
* Legislatures don't care if i go to war.
* Legislatures don't care about anything unless I propose it.
* No other country cares if you set high tariffs because they have no clue that you are fucking them.
* Being pretty allows you to buy things whereas offering more money is useless because sellers only care if you are pretty.
* Buyers will buy anything at any price if they have the money. But some evil god set a max price.
* Because Capitalists exist solely to spend money, they don't care about demand or cash flow even if they do care about margins. Probably because it is pretty.
* Bureaucrats can work without paper.
* Most people that matter were invented.

Things I would like to learn:

* How to build a railroad fort and a port at the same time in the same province, given that I have the resources. I can chew gum and walk, why not this?
* How to build a (railroad, port, fort) at my present level of technology rather than starting with the HO scale model first and proceeding sequentially through all possible incrementation until at last I arrive at what I intended in the first place.
* As the invisible supernatural leader of my people, where the hell is my ring?
* Why, if some ass declares war on me, I still get infamy if I demand anything in compensation for all the damage?
* How did Britain get ten times the military of the entire world and not even go bankrupt under the weight or strip its nation of trees? They must have a ring.
* Why, if I put all those nice artillery pieces in my nice big fort the army there doesn't use them or shoot at ships.
* How to build AA units.
* How to build a blimp.
* Where I can find aluminum. I hear that is real useful to build real functional planes with.
* Why my planes can't find and sink their ships.
* Dr. Zarkov, my wizards scientist, tells me I can build something pretty hot with uranium and that his boy Flesh Gordon can deliver it in his rocket to that place that's never seen sunshine before. Where can I find that magical stuff?
* Why the wife and kiddies of my worker/soldier fall over dead when he dies. Can't they just try plural marriage. Hell, I got a stable.
* why I'm not making shitloads of money from all those canals. What, they never heard of tolls?
* How I can siphon money out of my country into my private account at Dr. Evil's Swiss bank, and why that shouldn't count for double the usual scoring.
* Why can't my navies competently capture the opposing ships? Really, 'cause, at least until guns are so powerful that things get blown out of the water first, they usually have to go on board and fight them hand to hand in order to win. And it's a lot cheaper than building my own boats.
* Why can't my voodoo clerics make a decent zombie? Or do I have to invent George Romero?

[M4j. Maniacal]

in 1915 the british began experiments on a new piece of military harware called a Barrel, this weapon would forever change military tactics in the coming decades.

[Brin Milo]

* the CSA won the American Civil war, only to have a slave revolt 3 months later turn it back to the USA, go figure.

*there is no China there is only Russia.

*Canada is a superpower, Ireland and Scotland gave the British the finger only for the Irish to meekly return after the Uk stared at it and tapped its foot.

* by 1900 there was a giant grey blob dominating central Europe there is no Denmark or Italy no France or Poland. Oh yeah, its called Germany. (and it also holds the midlands and the eastern counties)

[NapoleonI]

* Fascism is great and has no negative effects on society what so ever.
* Promoting pacifism is good for countries that want to expand their standing army.
* Capitalists are plentiful in a planned economy.
* Thilo Sarrazin was wrong. Minorities assimilate in a few years and the process is painless.
* 190 % of all craftsmen in Stockholm can read. 55 % of the population are clergymen.
* During the 1890is the world slowed down and days became longer due to the 50 million strong army of British soldiers in India.
* Even if stationed in the Himalaya with no food, no more than 15 % of an army can perish due to attrition in one month. If soldiers starve they will die on the first day of the month.

[Premu]

* The typical American is a socialist who prefers a Laissez-Faire-policy.
* Besides New York and California the most important industrial centers in the USA are Alberta, Nunavut and New Guyana.
* Larger nations have hundreds of dreadghnouts.
* Some states are able to keep taxes at 10% and still finance a giant army and a extensive social system.

[Fish Hunter]

- The minorities in the Ottoman Empire never thought of making an uprising against the Turkish oppressors and just looked how they slowly became assimilated.

- Oregon is a part of Russia, but Russia sold Alaska because they thought that Alaska was hard to defend against the British.

- Savoy and Nice never became French.

[htilden42]

Swiss neutrality ended in 1836, when they started invading the weak Italian states to the south, eventually gaining valuable beachfront property on Sardinia.

Later, with the collapse of the Hapsburg Monarchy, the Swiss wisely decided to liberate Tyrol from the horrible Austrian oppressors.

Speaking of which, the Swiss are as different from Germans and Austrians as the English are from the Chinese, and the country is 100% ethnically homogeneous.