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Thread: Things I've Learned from Victoria 2

  1. #21
    Second Lieutenant Magirot's Avatar

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    Marx got it backwards: You actually need communism to transition into capitalism.

  2. #22
    Slacker Extraordinaire Zzzzz...'s Avatar
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    A Man o' War has a structure that is strong enough to receive a blast from a nuclear bomb and remain standing afterwards.

    At the end of 19th Century, the workers, farmers and soldiers of the British empire united and overthrown the fat and lazy ruling class. The proletarian of Britain, Ireland, Canada, Oceania, India and China (China became a British colony during the mid-19th Century) established the People's Commonwealth. Long Live the Revolution!

    Also, during the chaos of the Great Proletarian Revolution, Scottish nationalists revolted and declared independence from their masters in London. And they lived happily ever after with their deep-fried Mars bars.

  3. #23
    Darkest Hour Team & Lead GFX Inner Circle's Avatar
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  4. #24
    • Clergy in XIX century were overwhelmingly liberal. In fact, they were the driving force of the liberalism. I can't believe no one remembers this.
    • Prussian separatism was one of the biggest problems of the German Empire.
    • In XIX century it was perfectly acceptable to sell a huge tract of land and then immediately demand it back.

  5. #25
    * That the word 'United Kingdom' stands for 'the United Kingdom of India and a few small islands somewhere in the Atlantic'.
    "The soul becomes dyed with the color of its thoughts." ㅡMarcus Aurelius, Meditations

  6. #26
    Historically plausible Dewirix's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by naggy View Post
    Tourist: "What is this contraption?"
    American: "It's an automobile. It's like a horseless carriage."
    Tourist: "Wow! I'd love to buy one."
    American: "Well, normally, I'd say go down to the dealership and get one, but first your nation must research how to build automobiles."
    Actually, it's something like:

    Tourist: "What is this contraption?"
    American: "It's an automobile. It's like a horseless carriage."
    Tourist: "Oh, you mean like the tractors we have back home, or the tanks, or the things-we-presumably-use-on-our-limited-access-roads?"
    American: "Yes, it's just a non-agricultural, civilian, presumably-exactly-the-same version of those".
    Tourist: "Wow! Wish we could make those back home."
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  7. #27
    Catalonia is French

    Schleswig-Holstein and Jutland is usually Prussian or Austrian (I live in Jutland /cry)

    The Great Powers have laid a plan to eliminate all non-Great Powers.

    The Netherlands always make sign the Treaty of London and goes to war with Belgium over Wallonia.

    The world begins to go slower in 1880, something must have hit the earth...

    Krakow was one of the first nations to find the lost treasures of Egypt (The Valley of Kings decision)

    Morocco is divided by Spain, France, Portugal, the Netherlands or Britain.

    Cement, Steel, Liquor, Wine and Glass are profitable, everything else gives a deficit.

  8. #28
    Sergeant Confucius Rex's Avatar
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    After Japan industrialized, the Japanese people immediately started to emigrate en masse to Serbia.
    Before 1836 European nations were able to colonize some parts of Africa before suddenly being stopped by African magic that the European nations had to develop new technologies to conquer.
    There are no national markets, only the international market from which all nations are required to buy from.
    Transport costs are irrelevant in respect to goods.
    The nation of Norway is but a fleeting fantasy that will never come to realization.

  9. #29
    Sergeant crunox's Avatar

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    *chuck norris actually trained the british army to be invincible
    A human life, I think, should be well rooted in some spot of native land where it gets the love and tender kindship for the face of the earth, for the labors men go forth to, for the sounds and accents that haunt it, for whatever will give that early home a familiar unmistakable difference amidst the future widening knowledge. The best introduction to astronomy is to think of the nightly heavens as a little lot of stars belonging to one's own homestead.

  10. #30
    *That by 1850 75% of the population of iceland and greenland were north germans

  11. #31
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    In 1875 mainland Denmark was completely devoid of life, as the population had moved to Greenland and Iceland
    The American state of Washington is British
    Canada is considered a Great Power just like The USA, Oldenburg, Lucca, UK, Austria, Russia and Prussia
    Atheists are taught how to read by priests
    Greece never got a hold of Crete, it's still Egyptian
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  12. #32
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    *The mighty Austrian empire, at peace since it re-conquered Silesia, turned under a HM's governement at the beginning of 1870. However, after that, liberals lost upper chamber while they had won a 90% election at the lower house, so they couldn't extend the suffrage since socialist would not support them.

    *Also, Germany was peacefully founded in 1878 when Baden fell to German Panationalists and the Prussian King accepted the crown. However Baden, Bavaria, Wurtemberg, Hanover and Brausweich were not part of this country.

    *France was a very liked HM's country under this period, which was allied with many countries like Austria, Spain and United Kingdom and never fought a war with Austria.

    *Piedmont was a great ally of Austria and never thougt about unifying Italy.

    *Denmark is obviously a German land!

    American Civil War was fought between 1861 and 1866 and the result was the defeat of Confederacy (actually very not far from reality! Just the dates differ slightly).

    *Texas was after that taken by USA in a war against Mexico.
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    « [...] We are not the last colonized of the Earth, but the first emancipated from the old world of nation-states.»
    -Pierre Elliott Trudeau, 20 mai 1980

  13. #33
    Ask how many Divisions I have! InnocentIII's Avatar
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    There are two kinds of angry Liberals: The Angry Liberals who want to extend civil and voting rights via revolution, and the Even Angrier Liberals who want to end all that and establish an Angry Liberal Dictatorship.
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  14. #34
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    *Russians were very interested in colonizing Africa, the Russian Madagascar is one of the most famous Russian colonies.
    * When Russians sold the Alaska, they refused to sell Oregon as well. The state is often referred as Russian United States of America.
    *One of the most famous battles in the 20th Century was when Byzantine forces met Babylonian armies in the battle of Ankara.
    *British industry followed the hyperbolic growth until their industrial power turned negative.
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  15. #35
    Many think that steam power was the most important invention of the XIXth century. It's not true. The world has truly changed January the 1st, 1836. It was when two scientists from Cambridge discovered a mind control device which could mold every single human in the Earth into a perfect British. Unfortunately, its plans were stolen by foreign spies and soon every country in the world had its modified version.

    Still, this has proven to be beneficial to the humanity. The nationalism, which had poisoned the world for too long, had been eradicated in less than a century. The humanity, no longer imprisoned in the ruins of the Tower of Babel, had finally managed to unite against their tyrants. After the head of the false Empress had fallen on blood-soaked ground, we have eliminated conservative and socialist scum and begun a new era.

    Long live the Republic of Britain, the ruler of the world! Long live the anarchy!
    Last edited by Gantolandon; 25-10-2010 at 01:37. Reason: Minor grammar and spelling errors.

  16. #36
    * 5% of all Communists in 1900 were self-described capitalists.

    * The sun never set on the British Empire: It stayed up straight for 100 years.

    * Germany didn't form until 1924.

    * Belgium never owned the Congo as it was reduced to 1 state by the NGF, and was reduced to rank 64.

    * When Cuba gained independance from Israel, they destroyed all factories as they do not know of the combustion engine.

  17. #37
    OT's own Sgt. Schultz telesien's Avatar
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    * All the recent talks about Chins stealing technology must be lie, since technology can only be researched (sorry for copying my own idea)

    *Never trust anarcho-liberals. They claim to be freedom fighters, but timmediately after winning the revolution they establish the most severe dictatorship where even they don't have any voting rights

    *Engineer is a guy who is defined by using muzzle-loaded rifle

    *The whole story of aristocracy turning to goods production in the 16th century must be some big misunderstanding, because aristocracy obviously can't turn into capitalists
    Last edited by telesien; 25-10-2010 at 01:57.
    "'Religious faith. Belief in daemons, belief in spirits, belief in an afterlife and all the other trappings of a preternatural existence, simply existed to make us all more comfortable and content in the face of a measureless cosmos. They were sops, bolsters for the soul, crutches for the intellect, prayers and lucky charms to help us through the darkness. But we have witnessed the cosmos now, my friends. We have passed amongst it. We have learned and understood the fabric of reality. We have seen the stars from behind, and found they have no clockwork mechanisms, no golden chariots carrying them abroad. We have realized there is no need for god, or any gods, and by extension no use any longer for daemons or devils or spirits."

    - Primary Iterator Kyril Sindermann

  18. #38
    Field Marshal naggy's Avatar
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  19. #39
    Captain M4j. Maniacal's Avatar
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    during the 19th century all the worlds resources were exported soley to england

  20. #40
    The Mexican-American War is a myth.
    Prussia took over France. Or France took over the Rhineland. History isn't quite sure.
    Howard Carter was French.
    The Balkan Wars ended in Status Quo Ante Bellum (white peace) because Russia was the alliance leader and didn't feel like fighting more than 6 months.
    Contrary to popular belief, people in the southern United States had no desire to be soldiers. New Hampshire, OTOH, could support an entire division by itself. (OK, this was fixed in 1.2. But still...)
    Disease hit armies as soon as they entered a province and then not at all until the first day of the next month.
    Anarchists want as small a government as possible. That's why, whenever they succeeded in a coup, they ignored the welfare state and repealed all political freedoms.
    Santa Ana was never captured, and Texas is still a part of Mexico because the US couldn't be bothered to help out.
    California is 18% British, 15% French, 8% Bengali, and only 10% Mexican despite being controlled by Mexico for 50 years.
    Imperialism started in 1850.
    People started thinking 50% faster when Empiricism was discovered.
    Countries that believe in equality can draft people more effectively than countries that believe in shutting up and following orders.
    The UK could field a million-man standing army by 1865.
    >>Starting in 1836, North Dakota was a highly desirable place to live. As soon as it became a state, no one wanted to move there.

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