The Fatimid Caliphate: The Seventh Branch pt.2
It is worth noting, at this time, the disparity between the Emperor of the West Jordan de Toulouse and the Fatimid Calipha Zeyd, as well as the realms they ruled.
The Toulousian Empire was at the time of Jordan's crowning a mere shadow of the Holy Roman Empire that had stretched from Morocco to Brandenburg, that had taken Constantinople and held the Croats, Lotharingans and Neustrians as near tributary kingdoms. It faced rebellious feudal lords, suffered from ethnic fractioning, as well as Emperors spending their time running the court instead of the country. Jordan, an Occitan by birth, decreed that the Empire had lost its way and moved the court from Imperial Milan to old Toulouse. The birthplace of his line was by any measure a beautiful city rich in both culture and gold, but it further removed the already aloof court from the always independent minded Italian cities as well as his Arab subjects chafing under Christian rule.
The last Emperors of Italy
Palermo University Press
How the devil does one get pneumonia in South France?
The Caliphate meanwhile was prospering under Calipha Zeyd, who during his long rule had done extensive work to calm the hothead Lords Fatimid. As well as binding the two Caliphates closer to one another. By the time Barbarossa was starting his campaign any lordly or Sovereign line worth its salt had a girl in the Caliphate harems, and Zeyds offspring were plentiful enough to form their own class at the Alexandrian War Academy. Something other jokingly implied was the reason the Calipha ordered the establishment of a third Academy in Palmyra.
Following his ongoing efforts to structure the rather anarchical use of uninhibited power by the Fatimid nobility was the raising of the old Masters of the Watch, formerly honorary titles for the Castellans of Damascus and Palermo, into Emirs al-Mumenin. Who were granted overall command of the new Syria-Jerusalem and Barbary military districts, centred on Damascus and Tunis respectively.
It was Zeyds plan that with the day-to-day running of far of provinces off his shoulders he could focus on more longterm matters. Such as the rising popularity of duelling amongst the younger Fatimids which had caught his attention after his spymaster, one Hakim Yngling, had gotten himself killed after an lieutenant of the Sayyedi Guard had taken offence at some comment over the Calipha preferring to spread the faith in bed rather than in the field.
The Calipha was soon to find, however, the risks of delegating military command to far of Lordlings.
From -2 to +3 stab, dude's good at calming things down. Also; harems apparently conductive to longlevity..
"He
what?" The Calipha burst ouf of his bed, courtesans falling pell-mell in his wake.
"It appears the Lord Fati, eh, Emir al-Mumenin Hayreddin of the 7th branch has retaken the isles of the west and is now refitting in Tunis while boasting broad and wide of his plans to retake Sicily come spring.." Master of the Court ibn Abbas responded from behind the Nubian eunuchs of the Harem Guard.
"It
is bloody spring! The insolent whelp was supposed to be chasing Pirates!" Zeyd raged, tossing aside concubines on his way to the wardrobes. "Not start a Jihad! I had just gotten the trade guilds to start paying tolls to my coffers instead of wasting it on maintaining escort ships!"
"He has declared that the only way to stop piracy is at its source, and requisitioned all the battleworthy ships of the west in the name of the power you delegated him last year."
"By Allah! We will have all of christendom upon us by next year! Send a rider to Baghdad, the Rus will surely stir over this, and have someone in the Greek senate remind them that the bread they throw to the mob was baked with Egyptian grain!" The Calipha ordered, stepping on a slavegirl to reach a fez on the top shelf.
"There is also the issue of the Sultan of al-Andalus declaring Jihad in Iberia, and decreeing Hayreddins actions just and holy"
"That heretic? I thought he was christian by now?" Zeyd grunted, rifling past various sashes and strumpets.
"Apparently he has decreed the court is to pray both at the mosque, church
and synagogue each week. So as to more completely understand the face of Allah..."
"Well isn't his weekend full." The Calipha growled through his teeth, wading through a gaggle of mistresses on his way to ibn Abbas "Round up the Guilds and Emirs, it seems we will be burning Milan!"
"Its Toulouse now"
"I thought they were moving back during the winter?"
"It appears the Emperor is spending all year in his ancestral lands."
"Lets burn both to be sure!"
"No one ever claimed we were subtle.."
While the Calipha was just finding out about the troubles in the west Hayreddin Barbarossa had already launched his assault on Sicily, smashing aside a respectable fleet assembled by Pisa and Genoa.
My island rose up against the infidel dogs at first sight of our banners of the coast of Siracuse, just as I had said they would! Hardly had I even swept aside some Italian ships troubling my landing before the entire east of Sicily had thrown of the yoke of the Toulousian tyrant and embraced me, Barbarossa the Magnificent, as their rightful Emir! But such little gains are not enough for me, Hayreddin the Hammer, and soon I had marshalled another 10 banners of the lokal Arab faithful and marched on Palermo!
There before the city that by ancient and divine right belonges to the head of the 7th branch Fatimids, ME, Barbarossa the Liberator, I was met by Wilhelm de Hauteville. I don't know what he was going to say, because he introduced himself as Count of Palermo. Which he isn't. Because I am. So I put an axe to his face. Then I noticed he had left the gate open, so I rode into my city to take it and was victorious! After I was done being victorious in Sicily I decided to go be victorious in Italy to!
I remember my gandpa saying our island was invaded by the Neapolitans, so I started there. In Italy the infidels had closed their gates, which forced me to rethink my carefully crafted plans. But realizing that would take to long I instead ordered my engineers to bombard it with naphtha for a month while I went back to Tunis to look after some things. After I came back we had a peek through the gates and concluded there were no more Italians there, lots o' ash tho. After we were done there we went to Salerno to. When they saw us they opened the gates for us, which made burning the town down a lot easier. Then my sergeant treasurer notified me we couldn't pillage any more cities, because our ships would sink from the loot, so we went home.
My Island!
A Memoir of Blunt Force!
