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Väinämöinen is the name that all finn children are born with. When they get to the age of two, their parents then pick their child name, until they're 18 when they get to choose their adult name.
 
I love it, same leader but two utterly different portrayals of him. Not that such information gets manipulated generally of course *cough* questionable election opinion polls *cough*!

Excellent update.
 
Aw, c'mon, even if all those things were true, all his evil deeds should still see him sent straight to Harry's loving embrace...

But I have to admit, nice job by Gabi spinning things his way. It is almost convincing. Almost...
 
Hmm... nothing.
Just the usual tsuhna-madness.
The Finnish names don't make any sense. :cool:
I agree. Toikka? Venla? Why don't they use proper names, like Matti, Heikki, Matias etc.? Eu3 also has names like Väinämöinen :wacko:.
Because those names you proposed are Christian names, but CK has old paganish names. :p
Or some gibberish. :cool:
Väinämöinen is the name that all finn children are born with. When they get to the age of two, their parents then pick their child name, until they're 18 when they get to choose their adult name.

Don't blame me ... I think its because the first King title I acquired was King of Finland, so they've acquired Finnish culture. Anyway have now learnt how to mod the save files and we'll soon enough return to proper Russian names.

I love it, same leader but two utterly different portrayals of him. Not that such information gets manipulated generally of course *cough* questionable election opinion polls *cough*!
So Heaven has its own spin doctors? Fantastic!

For some reason this seemed topical, enough to give anyone bad dreams really ;)

Aw, c'mon, even if all those things were true, all his evil deeds should still see him sent straight to Harry's loving embrace...

But I have to admit, nice job by Gabi spinning things his way. It is almost convincing. Almost...

and, just for a change ...
 
Toikka's synthesis

Scene 1: Waiting area outside the Court, Toikka and Ukko are talking

“what happens is you end up with 4 or 5 of them, 2 seem to be some sort of clerks who hold all the paperwork and then Harry, Gabi, maybe someone else turn up and ask questions, and fight amongst themselves. You’ll be ok, after all Kettu got off”

“Toikka, we’re ready for you now”

Scene 2: the vestibule of Hell

Harry enters leading a bemused looking Toikka

“hey Guys, am I the man, we’ve got ourselves a real live Rurikovich, this sort of thing just made the case, first I had further evidence of intent to invade his neighbours,



and of course its hard to go from that to this, without being aggressive to someone



See, I've really got my old touch back ...

Harry stops and notices the lack of acclaim from his demonic hordes

“Guys, Guys, Girls? Look I know this is the domain of mischief, chaos and brutality but all this pushing and fighting is so unseemly when I return in triumph”.

A spear whistles past his head, followed by a rather sickening grunting sound

“right what is going on, this is so not funny”

My liege – yes what is it Astarte?

You might want to read this

What? ... “красный демон (Red Demon)? Starts reading

“We, the demonic democratic republic of Hell, demand the overthrow of that tyrant Harry on the grounds that he isn’t very tyrannical and Hell has been allowed to fall behind as the destination of choice for the discerning evil doer”

What tosh, Muffin pass us your spear

Right, that’s you kebabed for a while, Baal [1], so who’s behind this?

gasp, Beelzebub my liege

Astarte bring me Beelzebub [2]

"Do you want me to retrieve the spear sire?"

"No no Muffin, I’ll use this", starts rolling up the newspaper … "I believe its what the humans do"

Scene 3 Heaven

“right Gabi, you do have some explaining to do. You assured us there were no maps revealing plans for world conquests, no laughing at the misfortunes of other realms




So what do you plan to do … my lord

Well you’re to be demoted, Michael and Raphael will take over your duties, and, Harry is a bit short handed as he’s lost Beelzebub, so you can help out down there for a while, especially till Toikku is recovered from that nasty spear wound …

So Toikku how are you feeling now?

Scene 4 The Vestibule of Hell

Harry is supervising the demons using the damned to repaint the walls

“You, ... yes you, ... Demon, .... demon, .... demon charles [3], you’ll find you get more whitewash on the wall if you dip the head in the pot not their feet”

Gabi, sidles in

“Gabi what are you doing here? Not really your sort of place”

“well I’ve been demoted … temporarily mind you”

“ok, for starters make yourself useful, grab one of the damned and paint over that nasty fly stain over there”

Now Harry has his mojo back, is it time for the Rurikovichs to behave? When will Toikka be recovered enough to serve out his sentence? Is Gabi really up to Beelzebub's job?

1 - who is often depicted as a sort of sheep/goat thingie
2 - who is of course, also known as the Lord of the Flies
3 - who may, or may not, have a Scottish accent
 
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It's a turnup for the books! Gabi's been humbled, Harry's got his groove back (the Demonic democratic freedom fighters could be defeated with a rolled-up newspaper? Not exactly great advertising for their prowess) and a Rurikovich resides in his rightful afterlife!

I particularly enjoyed the half-assed demonic revolt and Harry's subsequent housecleaning (literally! Hah!). :)
 
and a Rurikovich resides in his rightful afterlife!
If by "rightful afterlife" you mean "went out the back while Harry thrashed the rebels!"
loki100 said:
Scene 3 Heaven
...
So Toikku how are you feeling now?
But, hey, the Messenger of Heaven fell into hell, so it's not a total loss for the forces of evil.
 
“We, the demonic democratic republic of Hell, demand the overthrow of that tyrant Harry on the grounds that he isn’t very tyrannical and Hell has been allowed to fall behind as the destination of choice for the discerning evil doer”​

That really had me chuckling, excellent stuff. And demons use the damned as paintbrushes? Finally an explanation for the afro...
 
If by "rightful afterlife" you mean "went out the back while Harry thrashed the rebels!"

<Insert highly salient quote that got lost in hitting the 'quote' button and that I'm too lazy to reconstitute>

But, hey, the Messenger of Heaven fell into hell, so it's not a total loss for the forces of evil.

How did I miss that?!?

Well, at least, as you point out, Harry gets to gloat over Gabi, even if it's only temporary.
 
Hahah. I am carrying spears in Hell!

always happy to incorporate the readership as well as I can ...

It's a turnup for the books! Gabi's been humbled, Harry's got his groove back (the Demonic democratic freedom fighters could be defeated with a rolled-up newspaper? Not exactly great advertising for their prowess) and a Rurikovich resides in his rightful afterlife!

I particularly enjoyed the half-assed demonic revolt and Harry's subsequent housecleaning (literally! Hah!). :)

How did I miss that?!?

Well, at least, as you point out, Harry gets to gloat over Gabi, even if it's only temporary.

If by "rightful afterlife" you mean "went out the back while Harry thrashed the rebels!"

But, hey, the Messenger of Heaven fell into hell, so it's not a total loss for the forces of evil.

thank you Sophilia, glad someone was actually paying attention ;), its a sort of a swap, but I don't think that Gabi has worked out the full implications yet

That really had me chuckling, excellent stuff. And demons use the damned as paintbrushes? Finally an explanation for the afro...

... or at least a decent use, imagine what'll happen when all those rockers from the 50s start pilling up down there ... Harry's interior decorating problems continue into the next episode

Please stick with Finnish names, there is no other cool AAR with a Finnish kingdom, Russian family-name with Finnish speaking members. :cool:

Russia > Finland... cos

I'll see what happens, the next King is Finnish but I've modded the save game so that King of the Rus is the primary title and it seems as if the generation after are becoming a bit more Russian again, and, somewhat more insane, but you'll have to wait a wee while for that to become plain.
 
Tuokki 1179-1182, the new Vladimir?

Scene 1: Outside the Court

Grandfather, what are you doing here?

Oh waiting you know, always waiting

But for what?

Oh well, you see you get judged on your actions when alive and then assigned to an appropriate corner of eternity. The last century or so, its been pretty easy for our family but there are rumours that a new regime is in place and its all going to be so much stricter.

Oh well that doesn’t worry me, I was so good, so successful, so virtuous what can they do to me?

Send you to Hell for eternity?

Scene 2: Inside the Court

The 2 clerks and Raphael

How do you want us to address you?

What do you mean?

Well Gabi, you know Gabriel, with him it was a bit informal.

I think for simplicity you’d best keep to my short title, the Archangel Raphael will do

Wonder who Harry …

Look this court needs more formality, there's been just too much laxness recently, you mean the Prince of Darkness

Yes, well we were wondering who he’d send to present his case

Well since I have attended, I rather expected it to be himself

Possibly not, we hear he’s having problems supervising the decorators they have in down there

Door opens, whiff of sulphur enters the room

Hi

Gabriel? What are you doing here?

Well Harry thought that since I was doing penance I could do this too

Scene 3: The trial

Tuokki, King of the Rus, King of Finland and all the rest you are accused of pride, taking pleasure in the ill fortune of others, lust and waging aggressive war, how do you plead? …

Tuokki please begin

Well, I was pretty pleased, I mean at the start of my wise reign, all these people just flocked back to the Kingdom:







Yes, very impressive, but I, the Archangel Raphael, note from the file that Ilya didn’t volunteer until you’d fabricated a claim on his lands? Also all this hints at excessive pride, especially as you found time to laugh at the problems of your fellow Orthodox state in Constantinople



And, made fun of a rather confused land locked Sheik?



There is also the question of your morals. I note that both you and your brother managed to produce bastards in additional to your legitimate children:





Can I say something?

Yes, Tuokki, please do, this court is nothing if not fair.

Well it depends on how you present things, look my Bishop was quite pious:



Though admittedly that did lead to problems later on



Even the peasants got better, you know a bit less lax so to speak, in my reign:



And despite temptation, I didn’t do anything too underhand



No, but you did attack a small Baltic county



Yes but that was a long standing family policy, really Grandfather had the basic idea and so we all just carried on doing it, and, anyway, look how well the children were brought up



Can Tuokki keep up these standards? Is the new regime more interested in celestial justice? How good will Gabi be at acquiring souls for Harry? Should Harry be less interested in the performance of his builders?

 
I'll see what happens, the next King is Finnish but I've modded the save game so that King of the Rus is the primary title and it seems as if the generation after are becoming a bit more Russian again, and, somewhat more insane, but you'll have to wait a wee while for that to become plain.

Thats what happens when you get fat rich and fulla voddy :rofl: