Tales from our Faarthers
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Turkish Rus? No one will ever accept him.
Maybe if we made his name more Russian sounding. Instead of Bugra he could be Bugr-off.
Perhaps he's channeling his name, if he's not producing any offspring (okay, that's the last time I'll make a comment about Bugra's name - it's starting to become in poor taste)...
I can't tell if Harry's truly making an effort to gain a soul, or if he's merely being contrarian. There doesn't seem to be much of a strategy in these case hearings on his side, just a lot of grumbling.
I don't know about office Christmas parties in the Netherlands, but the fireworks on New Years Eve are definitely there. The sky's lit up everywhere you look and your ears ring from the aural onslaught. This year, we still had some diehards going at it at 1:30 am in my parents' neighborhood. My 3-and-a-half year-old daughter was very impressed with her first Dutch New Year's.
I can't tell if Harry's truly making an effort to gain a soul, or if he's merely being contrarian. There doesn't seem to be much of a strategy in these case hearings on his side, just a lot of grumbling.
I don't know about office Christmas parties in the Netherlands, but the fireworks on New Years Eve are definitely there. The sky's lit up everywhere you look and your ears ring from the aural onslaught. This year, we still had some diehards going at it at 1:30 am in my parents' neighborhood. My 3-and-a-half year-old daughter was very impressed with her first Dutch New Year's.
He shall suicide.
Turkish Rus? No one will ever accept him.
well his birthplace is not far off that of one Iosif Vissarionovich Dzhugashvili so he may be setting a rather dangerous precedent ...
sounds more like the sort of dodgy Vodka that you can buy in Aldi? or is that just a Scottish thing?
Perhaps he's channeling his name, if he's not producing any offspring (okay, that's the last time I'll make a comment about Bugra's name - it's starting to become in poor taste)...
I can't tell if Harry's truly making an effort to gain a soul, or if he's merely being contrarian. There doesn't seem to be much of a strategy in these case hearings on his side, just a lot of grumbling.
I don't know about office Christmas parties in the Netherlands, but the fireworks on New Years Eve are definitely there. The sky's lit up everywhere you look and your ears ring from the aural onslaught. This year, we still had some diehards going at it at 1:30 am in my parents' neighborhood. My 3-and-a-half year-old daughter was very impressed with her first Dutch New Year's.
ach poor taste has never been frowned on in this AAR, the whole thing is an exercise in lack of restraint
glad she enjoyed the Netherlands ... you must have been in one of the posher parts. My partner's family comes from one of the rougher areas of Den Haag (they now all live around Amsterdam which is great for me) & the use of fireworks and creation of ad-hoc bonfires was down right ... enthusiastic (as long as it wasn't your car)
oh Harry has a strategy ... and I've got about 90 years (so roughly 20-30 posts) to work out what it is.
Apols for the delay, I've become utterly addicted to Rise of Prussia and have finally won the short Saxony scenario with the Prussians .... and then lost when I tried the same thing again. The AI in that game is nasty, if you split up, it concentrates and vice-versa. Helps with only 4-6 active elements in each game turn but its a real gem & it covers a genuinely interesting (& oft overlooked) slice of European history.
Bugra 1378-1384, in which he has a tihng about colours
Scene 1: The Gates of Hell
To a close (if very foolish) observer it looks as if Harry and Astarte are embracing?
'are we not a team?'
'no ... and get your hands off me'
'well we're doing a damn good job stopping Odin getting back into the proceedings'
'yes ... but thats not team work ... I'm doing all the work ... going out with all these men'
'yes .... but then I keep on getting exiled'
'you should be used to that by now'
'can I come in'
'no'
Scene 2: The court, Bugra is trying to explain his colour fixations, Michael seems to lack understanding of this particular motive.
'well brown, I mean, what real realm is brown coloured'
'so thats why you attacked him?'
'yes, that and he was the largest landholder not paying homage left in Russia'
'and of course there was that annoying purple bit'
'ah yes ....'
'well if I was going to war with them, I might as well make it profitable. I couldn't have this:
but I could make claims on this'
Satan do you have anything to say?
Harry?
Harry looks up a bit bemused, he's been reminiscing of a particularly fun day out in the woods
oh me, no nothing.
Do you mean you are no longer worried about all these mysterious inheritences.
No, no, nothing to it ... I mean people keep on leaving things to me all the time ... you know, their immortal souls things like that
Bugra, sees this as a chance to improve his reputation
'anyway, I must have been doing some things right ... first I cheered up
and then the realm cheered up ... obviously in response'
So will Harry and Astarte continue to ensure that Odin has no claim on the dynasty? Will Bugra ever actually get around to attacking Byzantium? Are there any other colours that might attact his attention?
To a close (if very foolish) observer it looks as if Harry and Astarte are embracing?
'are we not a team?'
'no ... and get your hands off me'
'well we're doing a damn good job stopping Odin getting back into the proceedings'
'yes ... but thats not team work ... I'm doing all the work ... going out with all these men'
'yes .... but then I keep on getting exiled'
'you should be used to that by now'
'can I come in'
'no'
Scene 2: The court, Bugra is trying to explain his colour fixations, Michael seems to lack understanding of this particular motive.
'well brown, I mean, what real realm is brown coloured'
'so thats why you attacked him?'
'yes, that and he was the largest landholder not paying homage left in Russia'
'and of course there was that annoying purple bit'
'ah yes ....'
'well if I was going to war with them, I might as well make it profitable. I couldn't have this:
but I could make claims on this'
Satan do you have anything to say?
Harry?
Harry looks up a bit bemused, he's been reminiscing of a particularly fun day out in the woods
oh me, no nothing.
Do you mean you are no longer worried about all these mysterious inheritences.
No, no, nothing to it ... I mean people keep on leaving things to me all the time ... you know, their immortal souls things like that
Bugra, sees this as a chance to improve his reputation
'anyway, I must have been doing some things right ... first I cheered up
and then the realm cheered up ... obviously in response'
So will Harry and Astarte continue to ensure that Odin has no claim on the dynasty? Will Bugra ever actually get around to attacking Byzantium? Are there any other colours that might attact his attention?
Den Haag... I don't think you can get any more 'enthusiastic' than that on New Year's Eve. I grew up in Apeldoorn, which is a sleepy town of 150,000, so yeah, not quite comparable to Den Haag.
Can't argue with Bugra's esthetics: that brown looks like an outbreak of diarrhea in his pretty green country. As far as the large number of unexplained deaths (and handsome inheritances) go, you could argue that the sheer success of the enterprise must mean that it's a good thing - it's successful, therefore it's good, right?
Nice reference to that famous son of Georgia, by the way.
I grew up in Apeldoorn, which is a sleepy town of 150,000, so yeah, not quite comparable to Den Haag. Can't argue with Bugra's esthetics: that brown looks like an outbreak of diarrhea in his pretty green country. As far as the large number of unexplained deaths (and handsome inheritances) go, you could argue that the sheer success of the enterprise must mean that it's a good thing - it's successful, therefore it's good, right?
Nice reference to that famous son of Georgia, by the way.
Forget about becoming Emperor of Byzantium. The Emperor is also King of Bulgaria. I think Bugra King of Bulgaria sounds very distinguished.
It gives you a warm happy glow and enables you to think about the good improved stability would be doing you if you were playing another Paradox game.
It gives you a warm happy glow and enables you to think about the good improved stability would be doing you if you were playing another Paradox game.
Den Haag... I don't think you can get any more 'enthusiastic' than that on New Year's Eve.
Can't argue with Bugra's esthetics: that brown looks like an outbreak of diarrhea in his pretty green country. As far as the large number of unexplained deaths (and handsome inheritances) go, you could argue that the sheer success of the enterprise must mean that it's a good thing - it's successful, therefore it's good, right?
Nice reference to that famous son of Georgia, by the way.
sort of it since it worked it must have been a good/acceptable idea in the first place. Certainly the other famous Georgian would probably have agreed. Next stage is to eliminate the ugly purple stuff.
In CK very little. I think it increases the speed at which you get prestige and decreases rebellions, but its not the critical bit of the game it is in EU3.
which more or less sums it up. I reckon I get less rebellions but then I have so much cash I can buy them off in any case these days.
rats ... wish I'd spotted that option earlier. As you'll see in the next post I've rather missed my chance ... unless of course this Emperor conveniently dies at some stage before wee Bugra.
Bugra 1384 - 1387, in which at least one of his colour problems is put to rest
Scene 1: The Gates of Hell
Just for a change Harry and Astarte are arguing
yes, it was your fault, you were meant to help me stop this happening
I mean I kept my end of the bargain
but, you, you were off playing with your voices
Harry looks offended
well, I did manage to keep him very busy
Astarte regards Harry with what might be considered some fondness
Yes, I suppose you did
So what do we do about Odin?
Astarte turns to enter Hell, Harry shuffles after her
... and just where do you think you are going?
Sort this out, before you get any ideas
typical, he's got the attention span of a gnat.
Scene 2: The clerks office
I don't understand it, for 250 years this lot couldn't put down a peasant revolt without getting themselves killed, captured or looting their own baggage train. They now can wage war with the largest powers in the world and this
is all that happens.
Scene 3: Bugra's trial
Bugra has finished explaining important stuff about arranging a few fosterings, sacking his wife and so on.
He makes to go.
Michael stops him.
Bugra. Is there something else you need to discuss?
No, think that covers it all?
A war maybe?
Harry checks his papers.
Two actually.
Oh that. Well I really had no choice given the sign that told me to do it ... I mean, after this?
and anyway it ended pretty well, no more ugly purple in the middle of Russia
Can I go now?
The assassination?
The what?
This?
Oh that?
Now Russia is no longer purple or brown what will Bugra do next? Just why is Odin so interested in baby Peksen? Will Astarte soften and let Harry back in?
Just for a change Harry and Astarte are arguing
yes, it was your fault, you were meant to help me stop this happening
I mean I kept my end of the bargain
but, you, you were off playing with your voices
Harry looks offended
well, I did manage to keep him very busy
Astarte regards Harry with what might be considered some fondness
Yes, I suppose you did
So what do we do about Odin?
Astarte turns to enter Hell, Harry shuffles after her
... and just where do you think you are going?
Sort this out, before you get any ideas
typical, he's got the attention span of a gnat.
Scene 2: The clerks office
I don't understand it, for 250 years this lot couldn't put down a peasant revolt without getting themselves killed, captured or looting their own baggage train. They now can wage war with the largest powers in the world and this
is all that happens.
Scene 3: Bugra's trial
Bugra has finished explaining important stuff about arranging a few fosterings, sacking his wife and so on.
He makes to go.
Michael stops him.
Bugra. Is there something else you need to discuss?
No, think that covers it all?
A war maybe?
Harry checks his papers.
Two actually.
Oh that. Well I really had no choice given the sign that told me to do it ... I mean, after this?
and anyway it ended pretty well, no more ugly purple in the middle of Russia
Can I go now?
The assassination?
The what?
This?
Oh that?
Now Russia is no longer purple or brown what will Bugra do next? Just why is Odin so interested in baby Peksen? Will Astarte soften and let Harry back in?
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Harry and Astarte must be able to claim Bugra for greed if nothing else. His stash of gold is huge.
Nice line.
When Astarte is viewing Harry fondly, is she A) sincerely re-evaluating her opinion of him, B) looking at him as one might at a old beloved yet incontinent mutt, who for once has managed to do his business in the yard instead of on the sofa or C) merely drunk?
Bugra is obscenely rich. As Alfredian points out, that's bound to be a strike against him in one religion or other. As a practical matter, besides periodically buying your vassals' loyalty, is there anything meaningful that you can do with 49,000 coin in the game?
aye, maybe one need for CK2 is to forget about realism and demesnes and all that stuff and come up with a more involved system of sins and virtues. In this case I can't get rid of it. I make about 400 a month, have set scutage to 0 (to drive up loyalty), church contributions are fairly high (to drive up piety and thus improve loyalty and reputation), have just had a year of warfare with most of the regiments mobilised and it still only dipped by about 7000.
but no, I can't use it. If some of my vassals have particularly poor provinces I give them 500 every now and then so stuff gets built. sigh - what was it about camels threading sowing machines in Hell again?
yep ... I'll go with that. The jolly green giant will smother Europe from the east.
Nice line.
When Astarte is viewing Harry fondly, is she A) sincerely re-evaluating her opinion of him, B) looking at him as one might at a old beloved yet incontinent mutt, who for once has managed to do his business in the yard instead of on the sofa or C) merely drunk?
go with (b), in the next update he manages to send the wrong teenager nuts, so its probably shock that a sequence of random actions led to him doing something right.
there's a sort of a useless male (dieties) theme to the next update as well ... not that the in game ones exactly cover themselves in glory.
just a reminder, one more week of the aar awards to vote in. Lots of wonderful stuff to go and read ... even a second AGEOD AAR now .... so then do your duty and vote ... for anything that takes your fancies
Bugra 1387-1392, plots develop (but not as they are meant to)
Scene 1: Valhalla
Odin and Freyja survey their collection of souls. Neither look happy.
"I mean they are so old"
"yes last one who died in battle is at least 100 now"
"anyway hows it going"
"what"
"your big plot to restore our place in the Rurikovich lives .... ah, don't tell me, not too well"
"..."
"come on, be honest"
"well she's still alive"
"ok"
"but there are still problems with securing the succession"
"time to see if we can produce either a direct male heir or change the succession rules?"
they high-five and wander off, looking rather pleased with themselves
Scene 2: The second circle of Hell, Minos is picking his teeth with his tail[1]. He is also complaining to Astarte
"look its getting really boring here ... so few of the damned to process, we're back to Marshalls dieing of old age"
"and if you've given them leprosy ... well bits drop off ... its just not hygenic"
Astarte gets a bit annoyed
"when was Hell meant to be hygienic"
Minos points to the recently published Health and Safety Audit
"pah, I'm off to see how Satan has got on with tormenting Peksen ... she should be due down here soon"
Minos fails to agree
"what do you know?"
"don't think that particular plot worked out"
Scene 3: Harry's refugee camp
He is complaining bitterly to Gabi
"I mean, I had all those problems just getting a barbecue pit dug and a bunch of mortals manage this"
"oh, hallo Astarte"
"Harry, remember we agreed you'd get rid of Peksen to keep Odin out the way"
"Yes, nice blond girl, all in hand"
"Harry, Peksen is under 5, this one was 14 ... and has a different name"
"oh well ... at least Bugra keeps of falling for the other trick ...
but he seems to be too chaste to actually do anything ... still at least it keeps him busy"
"but I did upset the bishop"
"ah yes, you did upset the bishop, she's still alive, he won't actually have a proper affair, but yes, you did upset the bishop"
"Harry if Edla produces an heir, we're out of business ... you'd better come up with something better than a stressed bishop ... especialy as he was mine in any case"
Astarte storms off
Harry looks to Gabi for re-assurance
"well what can I do?"
1- "cignese con la coda tante volte quantunque gradi vuol che giu sia messa" (canto V, lines 12-13) - but then you all knew that
Odin and Freyja survey their collection of souls. Neither look happy.
"I mean they are so old"
"yes last one who died in battle is at least 100 now"
"anyway hows it going"
"what"
"your big plot to restore our place in the Rurikovich lives .... ah, don't tell me, not too well"
"..."
"come on, be honest"
"well she's still alive"
"ok"
"but there are still problems with securing the succession"
"time to see if we can produce either a direct male heir or change the succession rules?"
they high-five and wander off, looking rather pleased with themselves
Scene 2: The second circle of Hell, Minos is picking his teeth with his tail[1]. He is also complaining to Astarte
"look its getting really boring here ... so few of the damned to process, we're back to Marshalls dieing of old age"
"and if you've given them leprosy ... well bits drop off ... its just not hygenic"
Astarte gets a bit annoyed
"when was Hell meant to be hygienic"
Minos points to the recently published Health and Safety Audit
"pah, I'm off to see how Satan has got on with tormenting Peksen ... she should be due down here soon"
Minos fails to agree
"what do you know?"
"don't think that particular plot worked out"
Scene 3: Harry's refugee camp
He is complaining bitterly to Gabi
"I mean, I had all those problems just getting a barbecue pit dug and a bunch of mortals manage this"
"oh, hallo Astarte"
"Harry, remember we agreed you'd get rid of Peksen to keep Odin out the way"
"Yes, nice blond girl, all in hand"
"Harry, Peksen is under 5, this one was 14 ... and has a different name"
"oh well ... at least Bugra keeps of falling for the other trick ...
but he seems to be too chaste to actually do anything ... still at least it keeps him busy"
"but I did upset the bishop"
"ah yes, you did upset the bishop, she's still alive, he won't actually have a proper affair, but yes, you did upset the bishop"
"Harry if Edla produces an heir, we're out of business ... you'd better come up with something better than a stressed bishop ... especialy as he was mine in any case"
Astarte storms off
Harry looks to Gabi for re-assurance
"well what can I do?"
1- "cignese con la coda tante volte quantunque gradi vuol che giu sia messa" (canto V, lines 12-13) - but then you all knew that
Boo! Not fair quoting in foreign tongues were a copy-paste Google search doesn't give me an exact translation!
I must say, that is not the strongest defense Harry has ever mounted: "I bothered the bishop a bit". Although getting the chaste Bugra to seduce a bunch of his vassals' daughters is somewhat of an achievement.
Having pagan Norse gods high-fiving is certainly an... interesting... image in the mind's eye.
I have just worked out what has been niggling me all through this AAR. When I picture Harry, I am actually seeing Andy Hamilton (for those of you who haven't heard of him he is a very short, bearded British comedian). Has anyone else thought the same?
yes, me ... must confess the aar is inspired by equal amounts of Old Harry's Game (ie the aforementioned Mr Hamilton) & my own highly eclectic reading of the Divine Comedy
Glory be for Wikipedia! I didn't have a clue what you two were talking about, but now... I can certainly see some parallels. Though I'm not sure your Harry is as competent as his.