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Thread: Suenik the Beleaguered - a None Too Serious AAR

  1. #761
    Crusader for Fun and Profit Murmurandus's Avatar
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    Ah, celebrations... time to bring on the booze and pretty wenches!
    "May the Earth tremble with Beer... euh, Fear"

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    Deadpan Snarker Johan11's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Murmurandus View Post
    Ah, celebrations... time to bring on the booze and pretty wenches!
    And the time to get drunk and let out the german....
    I was fan of the week: 9/28/09

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  3. #763
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    Suenik has an army of a quarter-a-million?

  4. #764
    Patron Saint of Suenik Iain Wilson's Avatar
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    Feeding Back...

    Quote Originally Posted by morningSIDEr View Post
    Excellent update. The Kingdom of Croatia is hundreds of miles away...and yet I doubt that will be far enough!
    Quote Originally Posted by Murmurandus View Post
    Hah, trying to hide Croatia in France... Suenik finds it out always...

    Well, as you can see they've been let off - for the moment! If Suenik ever gets round to warring with France I'm sure they'll be there for the offing. Or I may just usurp the King of Croatia title!

    Quote Originally Posted by Snaake View Post
    Priceless!
    Thank you!

    Quote Originally Posted by Snaake View Post
    Although the most interesting suspicion of an affair I had was when my second wife was rumoured to be sending a lot of time with my oldest son (from my first marriage). It was just a rumour, though.
    Bloody hell - that's quite a rumour! Thankfully my son is only seven months old and I've only had one wife!

    Quote Originally Posted by Snaake View Post
    And back to the topic, what is it that makes those bishops so prone to affairs with people...
    There's a whole, controversial argument just waiting to happen there

    Quote Originally Posted by Johan11 View Post
    I say that Aboulgharib dies within four updates. How old is the old bugger anyways?
    He's pushing 60 now!

    Quote Originally Posted by Enewald View Post
    Is anyone getting a proper burial in Suenik?
    You don't really need any graveyards since everyone goes anyway to hell.
    And bishops are useless, they just consume the alcohol and make the people heretic. Invite back the Old Gods!!!
    Wow - someone's got his judgemental hat on

    Quote Originally Posted by Johan11 View Post
    Ia! Shub Niggurah!
    It's all about the murderers and the lunatics with you lot isn't it?

    Quote Originally Posted by Raaritsgozilla View Post
    I say 2. Maybe even next. Sueniks have a habit of suddenly dying.
    That they do. Stay tuned...

    Quote Originally Posted by AllmyJames View Post
    I say our glorious Lord and Emperor lives for another thousand updates!
    Quote Originally Posted by Scalenex View Post
    Stop speculating about our glorious lord's demise. Do you want to get put on the List for disloyalty?
    LONG LIVE THE EMPEROR OF SUENIK!
    Quote Originally Posted by Bingo Brett View Post
    Hear hear! I say we make him Emperor Eternal!
    Loyal minions! My favourite kind! Aboulgharib, for all his flaws, has kind of grown on me though.

    Quote Originally Posted by KaiserMuffin View Post
    Suspciously loyal...
    Yeah, well, they know about the wells...

    Quote Originally Posted by AllmyJames View Post
    I wonder what will happen when he's gone. Either everyone will be relieved, and have a big party, or no-one will know what to do and stand around looking dazed.
    I think the phrase "realm duress" springs to mind!

    Quote Originally Posted by Johan11 View Post
    The red is the rucksack rodent, right?

    Of the ghosts, I mean.
    It is indeed dear old Bagrat. The orange is Mleh and the black is...well...I'm sure you can figure that out yourself!

    Quote Originally Posted by praxiteles View Post
    In fact I go there every summer. Great place to be. On the other hand, the strange name is really hard to pronounce, it is not used today .

    http://www.lycianturkey.com/
    Wow - you have some nice places to go to over there

    Quote Originally Posted by Murmurandus View Post
    Ah, celebrations... time to bring on the booze and pretty wenches!
    Abooulgharib is a good, clean-living kind of guy. However, booze and wenches will be in order for the soldiers...

    Quote Originally Posted by Enewald View Post
    Suenik has an army of a quarter-a-million?
    ...which as you can imagine is a LOT of booze and a LOT of wenches!

    Quote Originally Posted by Johan11 View Post
    And the time to get drunk and let out the german....
    It's not that big of a celebration!
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  5. #765
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    Heh, turns out that the heretic Bedros isn't someone you can get rid of that easily... Let's see if he can still cause some havoc in Onega.

    Solid conquests and a funny update. Yeah, adding the Croatian title could be something for the future

    Looking forward to the celebration
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  6. #766
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    Guess who took over Cyprus in my Ireland game!

    I now live in fear of "An evil servant of Principality of Cyprus has attempted to assassinate *insert Irish name* O'Neill and succeeded, but was discovered!" messages.
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  7. #767
    Deadpan Snarker Johan11's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Iain Wilson View Post
    It is indeed dear old Bagrat. The orange is Mleh and the black is...well...I'm sure you can figure that out yourself!
    What about Grigor and his defence, and then Mister awesome-name-byt-not-long-living-enough-to-make-an-impression-Hovhannes-Senek'erim?

    That was a long title I just gave him......
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  8. #768
    General morningSIDEr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Iain Wilson View Post
    He can manage "Dada" for "Daddy" and "Mama" for "psychotic German bitch locked in a tower" but that's about the extent of his vocabulary.
    Hmm...German but perhaps part-Scottish too! Brilliantly funny update.
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  9. #769
    Sergeant Cunobelinus54's Avatar
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    Can't wait to see what the cause for celebration is...
    I will revise this signature when I have thought of something funny.

    I ended up being a Count of the Duchy of Novgorod in Iain Wilson's Kingdom Of AARland.

  10. #770
    Deadpan Snarker Johan11's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cunobelinus54 View Post
    Can't wait to see what the cause for celebration is...
    Aboulgharib dies.
    I was fan of the week: 9/28/09

    On semi-permanent hiatus until CK 2 arrives. Don't expect to see me on.

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  11. #771
    Quote Originally Posted by Iain Wilson View Post
    Yeah, well, they know about the wells...
    You meant the "Aboulgharib screw" his lasting contribution to history, right?
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  12. #772
    Patron Saint of Suenik Iain Wilson's Avatar
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    SUENIK THE BELEAGUERED
    CHAPTER 66 - PARTY TIME!
    (1167-1168)


    Well, you all must be itching to know what the celebration I've got planned is, eh? After all, a hundred years of glorious Gardman-Aghbania rule requires something pretty special, right? Hold that thought - we'll come back to the celebrations shortly. Until then, let's see how the war with the Emir of Mosul is going, shall we?



    Poor him - his vassals didn't even come to his assistance; instead they choose to sit back and listen to my armies rampaging over his demesne and subduing it. I believe the Arabs have a word for that sound - it's called the sound of inevitability.

    So... This celebration? Well...

    Hang on...

    What's that?



    I summon Mleh and demand that he feed the current Royal Cartographer to the piranhas! Who the hell decided to paint Emba (wherever that is) the same colour as the Empire???

    You all know what this means, don't you?



    Thankfully Emba is defended by one man and his dog...



    ...so it's all over and done with rather quickly. I also decide to wrest this sandy arse-end-of-nowhere from it's existing ruler (if you can call "man who lives in tent and rules over a few hundred people and some camels" a ruler) and hand it over to the safekeeping of the Church.



    Let's get converting those heathens! That would be a suitable addition to the celebrations!

    Speaking of which, what I'm planning is...

    What?



    Obviously the decision to convert Emba hasn't gone down too well with her neighbours! Never mind, Aral is promptly dispatched and it's lands handed over to the (somewhat befuddled) Bishop of Emba. More heathens for you to play with. Have fun!

    While he's working on the locals I can carry on with my plans for...

    Would you believe it? Someone's knocking on my door! WHAT NOW?

    Oh.

    My decision to extend the One True Faith into the far east is really not going down well with the local one province minors who are making a brave, but foolish, stand against my "religious imperialism". Our next plucky contender is this guy:



    Unbelievably they slaughter my armies and before I know where I am the very capital of the Empire is under siege!

    ...

    Only kidding - they get the whupping that their hubris deserves and are shackled into the Empire.



    Next!

    No takers?

    So - my celebration...

    What would really show just how far Suenik has come in the last one hundred years?

    What would make it clear to the world our metamorphosis from backwater little county on the verge of annihilation, to one of the world's dominant powers?

    Hmm...

    I know!

    Are you ready for this?

    Here's a clue:



    Yup - I'm going to wipe the Seljuk Turks off the face of God's earth.

    Happy Birthday Suenik!

    Will Aboulgharib fulfill his promise? Do the Turks have any fight left in them? Is this a step too far for Suenik? Stay tuned for the next exciting episode of Suenik - Land of the Beleaguered!
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    Hurrah!!! All hail Aboulgharib, the New Alexander!
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    Happy Birthday Suenik!

    I love it, the best party ever
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    Happy Suenik Day everyone! Will there be cake?
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    Happy Sunik and St. Pat's day! Watch two worlds collide!
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    Wait until you get a claim for the Seljuk throne, and then add that title to your list of crowns?

  19. #779
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    Quote Originally Posted by Iain Wilson View Post
    Thankfully Emba is defended by one man and his dog...
    Yes, and thank you for disturbing an otherwise peaceful walk! My poor Jackrussel is still afraid to go out of the house. Excellent update!
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  20. #780
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    It's only a matter of time before Aboulgharib turns his attention to Europe...
    I will revise this signature when I have thought of something funny.

    I ended up being a Count of the Duchy of Novgorod in Iain Wilson's Kingdom Of AARland.

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