There can be only one

[vandalay222]

Empire that is. And the Seleucids are the only empire. Arguments could be made that they aren't technically large enough, but those only come from Ptolemys. And they think you can preserve a body by wrapping it in a towel and burrying it with gold.

And so war were declared with these false heirs to The Great Alexander's empire.


Here is the latest map drawn up by the heir apparent. Not bad for a child.


In a matter of weeks the Anatolian holdings were besieged


The Egyptians were defeated in open battle. The enemy commander was captured. He begged for his life and proceded to cry. Not knowing what to do, the King made him walk to his home dressed as a woman.


Things were fantastic. Too fantastic.


The ugly people WERE NOT INVITED


When the nobles found they had missed out they began to plot. They started to lose battles intentionally. And peace was signed with Egypt. Giving them one gold a month. After all the King felt sorry for them, crying and all.

[comagoosie]

The enemy commander was captured. He begged for his life and proceded to cry. Not knowing what to do, the King made him walk to his home dressed as a woman.

Don't you hate that when that happens

Oh no, nobles acting in a bold way! Is there going to be a civil war soon?

[vandalay222]

In 478 the ruling family of Crete sent a letter to the Mighty King.

"Dear Mghty Ruler of the strongest nation under the heavens. I am the legitimate ruler of an island in the Mediterranen called Crete. You may have heard of it. Recently we were attacked by the Macedonians, and my family and I have been overthrown. As you read this they are literally raping our land. But with your support the land could belong to you. All I ask is command of a few men, and I will use my claim to take Crete for the glory of your esteemed nation. When it is under your rule i will return the men and settle down as Governor of Crete.
[]I want to lend my support
[]I don't not want to lend my support
Thank you for your time"

Not wanting to start war with Macedonia the Great King checked not to lend his support.

When the Cretian recieved the letter he laughed all the way to the 1st Stratos general and handed him the note. The King clearly gave command of the army to him by checking the double negetive. After some discussion the general went home with the title of former general and a note in his hand.

The King opened with murmors from the nobles. They all stood up and began to walk out the door of the palace. The King sat with a blank stare on his face as he read "civil war were declared"


Without an army he couldn't defend against lowly barbarians.


With the ptolemys having made deceptive letters illegal, they were now obligated to defend the true Seleucid King. The tributes were rejected and war declared soon after. To get rid of the rebels of course. What a kind gesture.


And out of the wilderness the Egyptians came to meet up with the rag tag army that repelled the barbarians a month before.


As the militia greeted the relief army things took an ominous turn. The Egyptians began shanking their greeters. And captured Selucia.


But it was for the better good of the Great King. The rebellion ceased and all the nobles came back to the court. Each with a little perverbial egg on their face. Everyone was pardonned for their treason, even the Cretians. But only after they were made to lick the Kings toes.


Egypt was given a one gold a month payment for their "help" with the rebels. And the King rebuilt his armies, and hired mercenaries. The Egyptian armies were numerous as well as their navy, which was 280% larger spies reported.


By 491 the rebels foolish enough to create their own states were brought back into the Mighty Seleucid Empire, led by the well loved, Mighty Great King.


Crete found a way to rebel from the Macedonians. Maybe it wasn't a scam after all.

[Brandenburg III]

And they think you can preserve a body by wrapping it in a towel and burrying it with gold.

I need to go out and get my shovel but before I do that I wanted to say great work so far! Not that I’d know, not having Rome, so take that as you will

Crete found a way to rebel from the Macedonians. Maybe it wasn't a scam after all.

[vandalay222]

The great comagoosie and mighty Brandenburg III are looking at this. I blush ^_^

[comagoosie]

The great comagoosie and mighty Brandenburg III are looking at this. I blush ^_^

nah we are just wondering fools looking for a good story

Anyways, "I told you so" suffices in this situation. I told you the nobles were trouble and did you listen? No

Still you grabbed victory. I have no idea how but you did! Congratulations

[vandalay222]

I don't know how they won either. The teller of this story isn't very descriptive of some events. Like battles that were lost, or how half the country was controled by Egypt. Twice. It's as if only the good parts of history are being told.

[vandalay222]

Though now 26, the heir Antiochus has not impoved on his world map drawing ability. In fact the King wonders how his empire will fair under someone who can't understand basic perspective.


After the civil war the King held a triumph. Two actually, just to show the people how mighty he really was. This made him very popular. Too popular perhaps.


Even the gods waited eagerly to get a glimps of him. Maybe he was just the right amount of popular. He didn't want to get so popular that derranged fans tried to kill him.


The conquest of Armenia had failed. It was never even attempted. The Empire needed a new goal. And since Egypt was the enemy of most importance, he decided to take Lycia. They were Greeks, and the Ptolemys were forcing false gods upon them.
The King made a number of allies. The Greeks in the Anatolia were brought into an anti Egyptian alliance.


But soon after the wolf tribe north of the Bosphorus decided to gain glory by attacking The Seleucids. They measured their strength by the strength of their enemies. War with the Mighty King would make them to appear to be the greatest military force ever. They would beg for peace a year later.


Colonies were established to the West of the capital. Although the area was a bit arid, the cities could defend against Egyptian attacks in the future. And they would serve their purpose soon.

[Brandenburg III]

In fact the King wonders how his empire will fair under someone who can't understand basic perspective.

I don’t know if I should take offense to this or not.

It's as if only the good parts of history are being told.

I wish I could offer some sound advice but I can’t so have some cookies! No, I don’t have any, you’ll have to buy them on your own and be sure to get the good kind. But I will say this, I always look for AARs like this to games I’m thinking about getting. It says what it needs to say, shows a screenshot and keeps moving at good quality.

[vandalay222]

In March the Mighty King appointed his friends eldest son to General of the 5th Stratos. Eager to defend the new colonies, he moved the army to Nabatea. But the Egyptians saw this as an act of belligerence, and had the young general assassinated.


This could not be tolerated. To honor his death, the assassin was strung up by his toes. His eyes were plucked out, his tongue cut off, his nose snipped, and his hair shaved and gelled into a flat top. And he was sent back to the court of his Ptolemy master with a sign around his neck saying " war were declared". Ptolemy reportedly was heard screaming "DEAR GOD, WHAT IS THAST THING!?!?". And the assassin heard it clearly, with his perfect little ears. And cried as well.

An attack was launched into the desert lands, to take advantage of the two front war Egypt was fighting.


Although initially a success. Egypt quickly made peace with Carthage and the full force of their milltary might was unleashed. An entire army was destroyed, and another routed. Like the previous wars the Anatolia was in Seleucid possession.


As the Egyptian armies drove deeper into the Mighty Empire, attrition took its toll. Their three pronged approach fizzled out. The 2nd Stratos general launced an attack deep into the heartland of Egypt. Over the next two years their cities were captured.


After the spectacular battle of Antioch, Pontus completely destroyed the Egyptian main army. With the loss of their elephants, and no home country to rule from, the Ptolemys were forced to cede Anatolia, and pay indemnities for the men who lost their lives.


A great triumph was held in the capital honoring the brave general who won the war. And a large gift of gold was sent to the Pontians for the help they had given the Mighty King.

But not all of the King's allies had stayed loyal. Pergamon had betrayed the King. They did not join the war with Egypt. They would pay. Even if they were so called "friends".

But the Bythinians and Pontians went a step further and voluntarily offered to pay tribute to the Mighty King. So that he could "protect and unite all of the greeks".

[Enewald]

Shame that you have somehow lost all of your eastern terrotories?
How did they end up as too 'remote and hostile'?

[comagoosie]

Shame that you have somehow lost all of your eastern terrotories?
How did they end up as too 'remote and hostile'?

They looked at the king funny

If only I knew some of your thoughts while you were playing this game...

Continue!

[vandalay222]

I should have explained myself better in the first post. But The Mighty Great King cannot allow the scribe edit them except for gramatical errors. He is very stubborn that way

As the Seleucid Empire gets new monarchs, they will describe events differently. Antiochus thinks he is much better than he really is for example. And Antiochus II will remain a mystery for now...

Are you referring to the rebels in the East of the empire? Those are slave revolts. They were quickly reenslaved. As they should be. They live in a tiered society. And should live within their tier

But now I must make my next update. But this one is complicated to do for me.

Oh, I also get too excited and forget to take screenies when I get deep into a war. So I made a character excuse for it.

Falalala lala lalalalalan falalala lala lalalalalan

[vandalay222]

By the end of 502 the King implemented his plan to conquer Armenia. Assassin were sent to eliminate their best leaders with great success. The armies were moved to the border. The King to demonstrate power and rally the people even cancled the tribute from Egypt.

For such a blunder a few nobles wanted the King assassinated. But it couldn't be carried out due to his popularity.

The newly appointed generals made the best of the situation. Following the Egyptian army. Allowing them to waste time and sack the cities they went through. The royal family gathered all their belongings, and along with the nobles fled to Babylon.
After the the capital was captured, the Egyptian army was met outside the walls of Babylon. The following battle showed the cowardice of the Egyptian commander. In an attempt to flee, he was captured, and his army destroyed. None would be allowed to see their families in this life.


The King's allies showed tremendous courage in the capture of Judea. And the Egyptian armies were in retreat.


To the Great Kings dismay it was all a ploy. As Bythinia marched into the Sinai, two Egyptian armies sprung their trap. Following the disastrous battle, the Egyptians marched up the coastline capturing cities along the way. They even insulted the Great King with an offer of peace.


As they had earlier in the war the Mighty King's generals marched behind the Egyptian armies liberating cities just days after capture. The 1st Stratos even repeated the successes of the previous war by capturing Alexandria.


Pirates had plagued Lycia for almost the full duration of the war. The Great King brought the navy in and destroyed the single ship. As he docked his ships for the night, a single fire ship was floated in during high tide loaded with oil and and dry grass. The brave crews attempted to put it out, and were almost successful. Then it exploaded, covering the entire harbor in flames.
The entire navy was completely destroyed. A few months later, the Mighty King was dead. Too distraught to continue in life, knowing that the people of Lycia, a city he had saved from the Ptolemys, saw a complete military failure while he was the commander. "Would they remember my great success in the previous war?" was all could mutter the days before his death.

[Enewald]

Ptolemaios won.
Or is he dead too?
What about the rest of the 'friends of Iskander'?

[comagoosie]

This doesn't look too good...

[vandalay222]

Antiochus II had little time for sadness. This was the day he had been hoping would come for years. When he would be rid of his fathers uneducated comments about his art. When he could put on plays, build sculptures, and build great structures where the people could enjoy his artwork.

But for now he would have to end the war. Two months later an opportunity presented itself at the Battle of Pisidia. Tired and starving, the Egyptians were no match for the Pontians. Realizing they had no chance of winning, the Egyptians sent a messenger offering peace. The Pontians agreed, knowing that by the time they retreated to Cappadocia the Seleucid army would be there to massacre the Egyptians.

This was the final conflict of the war. With the Ptolemys realizing the fact that the war had become hopeless, a white peace was signed.

Antiochus II had won his first war. But it was won using his fathers strategy and his fathers troops. The war was already won when he took power.

He needed to gain glory for himself. He needed the peoples support. So in the winter of 508 he invaded Armenia.

In January Antiochus II rode triumphantly into Selucia with the Armenian generals, stripped naked and chained together at the neck.

For entertainment during the feast, Antiochus II made each of his prisoners put on a play. The general who put on the best play would be allowed to return to his homeland. To the joy of the crowd none of them had made a play to the Kings liking.


The people were so entertained by the King's triumph, that a new war was declared on Colchis. New generals were captured and forced to do interpretive dance.


Antiochus had captuered five cities only a year. He had also built defensive structures in key cities to better prepare for a war with Egypt.

The time for a new age in art had come.

[Enewald]

Invade India!
Oxidentalis must be yours!!!
And invade greece, for one must do so!!!

[comagoosie]

Hehe, you gave armenia false hope that they could expand, look where that got them

Are you going to have another round with Egypt so soon?

Your manpower doesn't look too good

[vandalay222]

With the tribes to the North no longer any sort of threat, Antiochus II decided it was time to unveil his grand art exhibit. The exhibit toured the empire, making sure that all of its citizens saw the greatness their King possessed.

His popularity with the people had grown to an extent that he was now referred to as "Antiochus the Painter". This all came at the price of angering the Ptolemys. And in 512 they sent spies to vandalize the King's art. Thankfully he was caught before any damage could be done, and beheaded.


Six months into the war the Egyptians were trapped between two armies at the battle of Nabatea.


They suffered a humiliating defeat. While chased back to Tabuk by the 2nd Stratos, the 1st Stratos followed a herding trail and flanked them. They were slaughtered in the desert moonlight as the brave soldiers on horseback chased them into the archers and infantry.


Again at Damascus the Egyptians found themselves out manouvered. While attempting to break the defenses of the 2nd Stratos, they were attacked from the side by the cavalry. As the line folded in on left, the cavalry archers were able trap a portion of the Egyptian main army in a pocket of blood and screams.


The remaining forces of Ptolemy were destroyed in front of the citizens of Nabatea. The city rejoiced and held a festival commemerating the victory with games that the prisoners of the battle were forced to participate in.


During the ides of March 514, Antiochus the Painter died at the old age of 46.

Would the artwork make him an everlasting ruler, or would his light fade over time? These are questions that would not be tolerated by his son. The touring exhibit found a permanent home in Antiochia, a port city near the capital of Seleucia.