This Mr. Eden seems to be suffering from some sort of mental illness as well.
The kind that only ice pickers can cure...
The kind that only ice pickers can cure...
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This Mr. Eden seems to be suffering from some sort of mental illness as well.
The kind that only ice pickers can cure...
I swear, if someone trepans the bastard with a icepick in Mexico City, I will personally drive to Sarmatia1871's house and tell him that I'm seriously cheesed off, and possibly also shake his hand and eat any pickled products in his refrigerator. We'll know if the revolution is heading that way if they start erasing Eden's name from history books. History is written by the victors, and also by idiots. Rule Britannia! Indiana Britannia! YEAH!
The Era of Commotion
1842 to 1847
__________________________________________________________________________________
1842 to 1847
__________________________________________________________________________________
***
Speakers and Dominant Groupings
In the House of Commons of the Commonwealth of Britain
1837 - Feargus O'Connor of The Charter Association
1838 - Feargus O'Connor of The Charter Association
1839 - Feargus O'Connor of The Charter Association
1841 - Feargus O'Connor of The Charter Association
1842 – Feargus O'Connor of The Charter Association;
--------- Replaced February by Henry Hetherington of The League of Moral Force
1843 – Josiah Wedgewood III of The Friends of the Rational Society
1844 – John Frost of The Union of the Industrious Classes
1845 – George Smythe of Young England
--------- Replaced April by James Watson of The Free-Thinkers
1846 – Henry Vincent of The Brothers of Liberty
1847 – Francis Place of The Friends of the Rational Society
1838 - Feargus O'Connor of The Charter Association
1839 - Feargus O'Connor of The Charter Association
1841 - Feargus O'Connor of The Charter Association
1842 – Feargus O'Connor of The Charter Association;
--------- Replaced February by Henry Hetherington of The League of Moral Force
1843 – Josiah Wedgewood III of The Friends of the Rational Society
1844 – John Frost of The Union of the Industrious Classes
1845 – George Smythe of Young England
--------- Replaced April by James Watson of The Free-Thinkers
1846 – Henry Vincent of The Brothers of Liberty
1847 – Francis Place of The Friends of the Rational Society
***
Official Records of the Session of
The Most Venerable and Hallowed House of Commons of the Commonwealth of Britain
Held Upon the 17th August 1846
Speaker: Motion to be presented by the good representatives of Manchester.
Machester First: Manchester does request a reduction on the cotton dues for the maintenance of the productivity of the Mighty Mills of Lancashire, which provide the heart of the national wealth.
Camberwell: The interests of Manchester are not those of the nation – besides, the monies of the cotton dues are well-needed in London for the provision of the docks and the good Sons of the Fleet.
Machester First: London is not the nation either, good Sir.
Camberwell: Sir…!??! Why Brother you do seek to insult me.
Leeds Second: I do agree with Manchester - the working folk of Leeds too need cotton of a better price, or else they shall be flung into the direst of poverty and subjection of which the slavery of the Israelites under Pharaoh shall be nothing when compared...
City of London Second: Bah! It is you who does seek to make our Good and Free Working People subsist on the Blood of the Slaves of the Plutocrats of the Americas and the Despots of the East!
Basingstoke: Concurred! He wishes to turn us into a Land of Cannibals and Vampires!
Falmouth: No - the work of the Poor and Indentured shall be spun into the Sinews of Liberty!
Brigg: Bloated Whig swine! You seek to throttle our own liberty with these threads you have spun yourself with your lying aristocrat’s tongue - We should have strangled you all ourselves when we had the chance!
A Most Impassioned Outcry prevails
Speaker: Order! Order! Debates on the cotton duties to be suspended until further deliberations have been made at the Board of Works and a full report prepared. Next.
Manchester First: But the Chairman shall simply decide as he pleases without listening to US, the Representatives of The Peop…
Camberwell: Hush! Our Chairman does not need to hear your frightful wind!
Denbighshire: Too true! Three Cheers for the Nourisher of Ireland!
One Half of the House: Huzzah for the Chairman!
The Other Half of the House: Boo! Down with the Iron Autocrat of the Board of Works!
Recriminations and obscene gestures abound
Speaker: Order! Next.
A continuing commotion
Speaker: Order! Order!
The commotion grows more heated
Speaker: Order or I shall summon the Chief Officer of the Staff of Liberty!
All grows hushed and quiet
Speaker: Thank you Brothers. Next.
Hexham: Men of the Commons, may I draw attention to the motion of which I had presented some weeks ago to our most venerable House regarding the possibility of the establishment of an official National Police Agency…
Birmingham North: Sit down Tory Blackguard!
Gwent: Bravo! The next we shall hear from him is that he wishes to dig up the Hated Pitt and seat his stinking corpse on the Speaker’s Chair!
Laughter and Commotion
Kirkcaldy Burghs: I do not know – a Foul Enough Stench has been emitted from that position often enough…
Hilarity, Whistling and Uproar
Speaker: Order! Order! Return to motion. Proceed.
Hexham: With the prevalence of the extra-judicial investigations to which my constituents have drawn my attention…
Linlithgowshire: “Extra-Judicial”…? You wish the work of our Valiant Commissioners be conducted in the full view of the Abominable Kings of Europe?
Epping: Too true - why not invite them here to crush us with their fat arses?
South Lanarkshire: No no! He speaks the truth!
Sunderland: Qui custodi ipsi custodi?
Cambridgeshire: My word, shocking...
Hullaballoo.
Speaker: Order! Order! I call upon the Chief Officer of the Staff of Liberty to close the Sessions for the Day.
***
A Despatch from The Commonwealth of Britain’s Envoy in Cairo
23rd May 1846
My Lord,
I would graciously inform your Lordship that I had the pleasure of a personal audience with His Majesty the Khedive Ibrahim Pasha, Hereditary Overlord of Egypt, the Sudan, Cretia, Palestine and Levantine Tripoli.
His Majesty is a most jovial, engaging and intelligent man, as are often found in the upper ranks of Oriental Courts. Yet even more remarkable are the changes he has effected, and is still engineering, in his Dominions. That his father’s triumphs over the Ottoman Porte a decade ago have revealed Egypt as a mighty military power is well-known. And his successes in the drawing of wealth from his Levantine and African possessions and from his unique emplacement to take advantage of commercial intercourse between Europe and the East (particularly given the turbulence overtaking the lands of India), is similarly renowned. His influence is furthermore beginning to extend over the Hedjaz and the Yemen.
Yet even more astounding are the political and social reforms he has been able to bring forth: close contacts with the Kingdom of France have filled the Khedive’s ample brain with many progressive ideas. Moves have been made for an assembly elected by a limited franchise, the removal of corporate restrictions, and the recodification of traditional Islamic law in line with such Enlightened general principles of the sanctity of property and freedom of association and commerce (although it must be noted that – as in France – this apparent constitutionalism does coexist with heavy – public - police presence). It is even thought that the Khedive plans for a written Constitution, based upon the Bill of Guarantees issued in the last year by the King of the French, to be drafted and promulgated – what a wonder!
While such policies would undoubtedly be unsuitable to the development of a Free Country such as Britain, they seem singularly well-suited to the Despotic Empires of the East.
I am Your Lordship’s Most Obedient Servant (and Most Brotherly Fellow),
Benjamin Disraeli
Handwritten Note:
We would like to recommend that The People’s Envoy to the Khedive refrain from using the term “Your Lordship” in his official correspondence towards the Minister of Foreign Affairs. While we are aware that The People’s Envoy is a man of high calibre and a sharp mind, his continued deployment of such antiquated and obsequious modes of address (as well as his other known affectations) do render us slightly uneasy.
He would do well to bear this in mind should he ever wish to advance beyond postings to minor Asiatic courts (for which his other personal qualities make him particularly well-suited), where he can do little but indulge in fantasies of “progressive” Oriental Potentates.
In Brotherly Unity,
G.H.
***
I'm not sure that a colonial state with two or three different systems of apartheid is really all that preferable.
Let's hope instead that he and his moderate friends can sweep into parliament.
Upper Ramsbottom: I should like to present a Motion of Appreciation to the Venerable Author for a Most Splendid Update.
Dickie-on-the-Codwobble: Rubbish! Poppycock! Codswallop! Arseketchup, I say! Arseketchup, Sir!
West Bramblefuck: Mr. Speaker, discipline this Foul-Smelling Reactionary Swine!
Trollope-next-the-Sea: I propose we raise the duties on vinegar by one penny! ONE PENNY! VINEGAR!
Persianshire: This is Blasphemy! This is Madness!
Glasgow Thermopylae: THIS! IS! PARLIAMENT!
Great update, with quite a fitting name. I say bring back the King's Own Fusiliers and show those bickering proles the smack of firm government, wot wot! </blimp>
Dickie-on-the-Codwobble: Rubbish! Poppycock! Codswallop! Arseketchup, I say! Arseketchup, Sir!
West Bramblefuck: Mr. Speaker, discipline this Foul-Smelling Reactionary Swine!
Trollope-next-the-Sea: I propose we raise the duties on vinegar by one penny! ONE PENNY! VINEGAR!
Persianshire: This is Blasphemy! This is Madness!
Glasgow Thermopylae: THIS! IS! PARLIAMENT!
Great update, with quite a fitting name. I say bring back the King's Own Fusiliers and show those bickering proles the smack of firm government, wot wot! </blimp>
Well it seems Parliament is just as entertaining as always. Egypt is a bit too close to the French for comfort, I presume.
A Sarmatia AAR? I really have been away from AARland for too long. Excellent stuff so far, it looks as though all those years digesting 19th C tomes has finally come in useful!
A very English revolution though... in tone at least. The influence of the French experience comes through occasionally (and I can't wait until 1848!) but it will be interesting to see how long the political reforms will paper over social tensions
A very English revolution though... in tone at least. The influence of the French experience comes through occasionally (and I can't wait until 1848!) but it will be interesting to see how long the political reforms will paper over social tensions
Many thanks - I'm taking a bit of time off at the moment to consume another batch of nineteenth-century convolution and associated commentary, but things should swing back into action with this fairly soon.
Huzzah, it's alive! I anxiously await the further Adventures of our Intrepid Revolutionaires as they continue to bring the Light of Reason and Liberty to the Benighted Peoples toiling under the Yoke of the Steam Barons and Aristocratic Oppressors!
BTW, Sarmatia, should we read anything into the constituency names in the Commons debate? As a political historian of the period, I find the names rather interesting. London representation appears to be by borough, while Manchester & Leeds by number & Birmingham by geography. What really interests me, though, is Kirkcaldy Burghs. I would have thought that the Scottish burgh constituencies would have been abolished as an affront to rep by pop. Perhaps the 'reformed' Commons is not as democratic as its pretensions might suggest?
BTW, Sarmatia, should we read anything into the constituency names in the Commons debate? As a political historian of the period, I find the names rather interesting. London representation appears to be by borough, while Manchester & Leeds by number & Birmingham by geography. What really interests me, though, is Kirkcaldy Burghs. I would have thought that the Scottish burgh constituencies would have been abolished as an affront to rep by pop. Perhaps the 'reformed' Commons is not as democratic as its pretensions might suggest?
Maybe they kept the name as being a Scottish term? Change of name doesn't have to accompany a change of system, although usually it's good to do it for symbollic reasons to herald and re-inforce that change...