Before war against Iraq was declared in Britain many people had been urging the government to break ties with "those damn Americans". They blamed them for the rise in obesity, the rise in gun and knife crime and anything else that could be considered remotely American was subject to defacing and vandalism. McDonalds almost shut down, much to the joy of roadkill everywhere.
Then the war in Iraq started.
This was the last straw for the already enraged British public, the government was even following the Americans into war. The government was not solely heald to blame, the Queen was also the subject of much criticism.
And so, on 22nd March 2003 the leadership of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland was overthrown and a peoples council was set up as a temporary measure until someone that embodied the TRUE spirit of Britishness was found to lead the country. They took less than 45 minutes to come to a decision. They had found their man.
And he was Stephen Fry.
Introduction: Above you buffoon.
Chapter Eye: IT BEGINS!
Chapter Eye Eye: IT CONTINUES!
Chapter Eye Eye Eye: IT GETS A LITTLE TEDIOUS!
Chapter Eye Vee: Expect the unexpected. But not too much.
Chapter Vee: A brush with a spy
Chapter Vee Eye: Not a popular choice
Chapter Vee Eye Eye: Doctor, Doctor please gimme some news.....
Chapter Vee Eye Eye: Intermission
Chapter Eye Ecks: EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
Chapter Ecks: A cookie to the man who can read this without losing his breakfast and stomach lining.
Chapter Ecks Eye: Head of Intelligence, oh the irony.
Chapter Ecks Eye Eye: Both hilarious and fun
Chapter Ecks Eye Eye Eye: It's a good thing they have names that could be considered ethnic.
Chapter Ecks Eye Vee: A brush with danger.
Chapter Ecks Vee: Now for something completely different
Chapter Ecks Vee Eye: NO UR A GAY!
AUTHORS NOTE THING
You do not need to be British or indeed knowledgable about Britain to read this, you just need a working British stereotype and you're away!
The characters may be difficult to associate with if you're not sure who they are, but just read and hope that the way I've charcterised gives you an idea of what they're like.
But here's a run down:
Stephen Fry - A horrendously clever and very stereotypically British comedian known for starring in Blackadder. He also hosts QI which I strongly suggest you watch!
Hugh Laurie - The other half of comedy duo Fry + Laurie, he also starred in Blackadder. Some of you may know him as House from the American drama series. Despite this he IS British, and quintessentially so.
Boris Johnson - Mayor of London, well known for his bumbling and general "ummm"ing. He also is the only person I have ever heard say "Phooey!"
Sean Bean - Played the role of British Commander Sharpe in Sharpe, the drama series.
Sean Connery - The most famous James Bond, I do make him seem more stupid than he probably is and I apologise for that.
John Cleese - Star of Monty Python and Fawlty Towers. Quite possibly one of the funniest men ever. Played the frog chap in Shrek.
Paul Merton - A comedian who I rather love. He's in comedy panel show Have I Got News For You which you MUST watch sometime, it's very good.
Ian Hislop - Also in Have I Got News For You, also very funny. And short.
Jamie Oliver - A British chef. A rather annoying chap but he has his moments of shouting at parents who are making their children fat.
Basil Brush - A British children's TV character. He's a fox hand puppet famous for shouting "Boom Boom!" every time he made a terrible joke.
Marvin the Paranoid Android - A depressive robot from Douglas Adam's Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy which I suggest you read.
All other charcters are figments of my imagination or horrific blendings of references that you should be able to follow.
Right then. Here's my second attempt at an AAR, this time I'm using the Modern Day Scenario mod for Hearts of Iron.
It'll include quite a few screenshots, be comedic (although not necessarliy funny ) and will be to a lesser extent interactive.
First decision for you, viewing public. First two infact.
Firstly should Lord Fry be first elected King of Britain or first President?
And also if you would like to nominate people you think are embodiments of Britishness to sit on Lord Fry's cabinet filling the places such as Chief of Staff one can usually find in HOI2. Be aware I've already picked some people so whatever you say may have absolutely no effect on the outcome.
ON WITH THE SHOW!
Edit: It's proving harder than I thought to edit Mr Fry in. Anyone got any tips?
Helping the progress of the AAR may be rewarded by afternoon tea and a place somewhere in the thing.