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Thread: Real Men Do It Alphabetically: An AARgau

  1. #1161
    Stupid and without purpose Charle_88's Avatar

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    Real Men Excommunicate Their Problems.




    Wait... oh yeah. Muslims. Uh... Never mind.
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  2. #1162
    General JimboIX's Avatar

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    Aren't Muslims less inclined to Realm Duress unless you add some events? IOf course, as all mods are Cathars...that could be a problem. But Real Men Transcend Problems.
    Corsican Dawn: The Rise of House Obertenghi
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  3. #1163
    Chairman of this board Dysken's Avatar
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    Prestige mines must be a truly horrible place.
    "Success seems to be connected to action. Successful people keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don't quit." - Conrad Hilton

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  4. #1164
    On the look-out for Grues... MagisterMundi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dysken
    Prestige mines must be a truly horrible place.
    I'm trying really, really hard to imagine it... and I'm failing.

  5. #1165
    Non sufficit orbis Lord E's Avatar
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    I am certain that the prestige mines are a wonderful place… filled with hard working slaves… I mean workers creating prestige…. Real Men really need such a mine
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  6. #1166
    Crusader for Fun and Profit Murmurandus's Avatar
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    Real Men Can Enjoy The Al-Jokes, But It Surely Is Getting Boring...
    "May the Earth tremble with Beer... euh, Fear"

    "Never change a winning avatar..."

    "Si hoc legere scis, nimium eruditionis habes."

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  7. #1167
    On the look-out for Grues... MagisterMundi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Murmurandus
    Real Men Can Enjoy The Al-Jokes, But It Surely Is Getting Boring...
    Real Men Think That Al Anything Is Getting Boring, And Should Be Swiftly Crushed.

  8. #1168
    Stupid and without purpose Charle_88's Avatar

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    Real Men Drink Until Al Jokes Are Funny.
    "Good people drink good beer."
    - Hunter S Thompson

    "In the begining the universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move."
    - The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
    88 is my birth year. It has nothing to do with loud German politicians and sexy facial hair.

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  9. #1169
    The League of Al has anonymous4401 stymied. Took awhile, but the invincible Seljuks have stopped the Habsburgs.

  10. #1170
    AARlander
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    Cl...Al-ms... Ok that doesn't work.

    Chapter 16: Al Bichri

    As told with many pictures. And a moderate amount of words.

    (All formats, fonts, layouts, and even this little disclaimer transferred unattentively from phargle's
    Knud Knýtling, Prince of Denmark (and other assorted tales))



    1154-1155



    I've got a critical Bible interpretation for you RIGHT HERE .|..-_-..|.




    Hey remember when the Pope declared war on Medina and I wondered if it would end well? Well that was a rhetorical question for me because I already knew it would not.




    Don't forget your prestige canary!




    The game's about three months late with this, but you'll have to excuse him. He's a bit slow




    Anyways Naples has joined in, but I predict that will only mean that Medina will control all of southern Italy instead of just North South Italy.




    Wah wah baby wants a court position. Well guess what, Hermann? You were an unwanted bastard! Oh, and you're not getting that court position because your stats also suck.




    TurkWatch: 1155. They are at war with what I assume are two Christian minor counties east of the Caspian or something. Anyways all it will mean is that they increase their power just a little more.




    Anyways I have extra prestige so let's spend




    spend




    spend!


    You might be wondering why I am bothering to spend prestige points on titles I will not even get to claim for about seventy years or possibly never when I will manage to take those Muslim Al provinces, but then I have to wonder why you bother to buy things when you are going to die eventually. Yeah. Not only was my logic ironclad there but it was also perfectly appropriate to this AAR. Take that, you doubters! Don't miss the next exciting episode of Real Men Do It Alphabetically, an AARgau!
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  11. #1171
    Chairman of this board Dysken's Avatar
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    Real Men Do Doubt Anonymous 4401.
    "Success seems to be connected to action. Successful people keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don't quit." - Conrad Hilton

    Bring back the American Politics Megathread.

  12. #1172
    Crusader for Fun and Profit Murmurandus's Avatar
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    Real Men Are Getting Desperate...
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  13. #1173
    Pantomacatalasecesionanis ta

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    Real Men Don't Wonder About Spending or Not. They Just Spend.
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  14. #1174
    General JimboIX's Avatar

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    It's a huge disappointment if a ruler dies with any prestige, all the better you spare them that.
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  15. #1175
    Sometimes I wonder if it wouldn't have been better to get all the A provs before being allowed to take B provs, etc. It would still be alphabetically, just not as strict. Funny how both of your liegi? have realm duress, shame you can't make the Sultan of Seljuks your liege.

  16. #1176
    On the look-out for Grues... MagisterMundi's Avatar
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    Real Men Know That If Your Ruler Dies As Anything Less Than One Of The Most Despised People In Christendom, You've Wasted Your Prestige.

  17. #1177
    AARlander
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    Heirs Al Made, Not Born.

    Chapter 16: Al Bichri

    As told with many pictures. And a moderate amount of words.

    (All formats, fonts, layouts, and even this little disclaimer transferred unattentively from phargle's
    Knud Knýtling, Prince of Denmark (and other assorted tales))



    1155-1156



    And so I make Johann von Habsburg, the fourth son of Stefan or something, a Count. Seriously Stefan has a ton of children.




    This is because Johann has much better stats than both Hermann the Ugly and Hermann the Ugly and Whiny, which are the first two in line to inherit Stefan. And to give Johann the inheritance I will have to de-Primogeniture myself.




    Of course one county isn't exactly enough, so I give another. As you can see Salic Consanguinity is the best inheritance law, as you can practically pick and choose among your children who should inherit.




    And voila.




    Of course if Johann inherits that means that Agen, despite being ruled by a von Habsburg, will be highly unlikely to ever come under my direct rule again, and Hermann the Ugly von Habsburg will go off to create his own branch of the von Habsburg line, just like Petros von Habsburg did in Al Amarah. Though it's not Hermann's stats that are valuable but rather the 3.20-base income of Agen! Really this failed attempt was the only way to prevent that. Alas.




    Hermann the Ugly and Whiny takes his whininess to the next level!




    I knew it! He has taken up residence in the court of Eberhard Haggis-propeller , son of Hartmann the Guy That Took More Than A Thousand Ducats From Me and my least loyal count! Surely there he will plot a devious plot of a thousand poisoned daggers, to take from Stefan Duke of Abydos what he views to be his rightful claim! Well let it come, Hermann! I will be prepared and turn your plot back on you in the mightiest of reversals of fortune!




    Unless of course you flee back to my court six months later for some reason.




    TurkWatch: 1156. Still insurmountable. However they are once again at war with Tabaristan. But it's not the Shiekdom of Tabaristan!




    No, it's the independent County of Tabaristan, ruled by a Byzantine Arcruni! Explain that one, you CK wizards!

    Seriously, explain that one. Because I have absolutely no idea. I don't even see how that is possible. The last time I looked at the province of Tabaristan, it was just incorporated into the personal demesne of the King of Seljuk Jerks. Heh. Seljuk Jerks. I should use that again later. Don't miss the next exciting episode of Real Men Do It Alphabetically, an AARgau!
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  18. #1178
    Stupid and without purpose Charle_88's Avatar

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    "Good people drink good beer."
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    - The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
    88 is my birth year. It has nothing to do with loud German politicians and sexy facial hair.

    *****


  19. #1179
    Crusader for Fun and Profit Murmurandus's Avatar
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    Real Men Are Avoiding The Real Problems... The Ones In Yellow...
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  20. #1180
    The Seljuk acquired the county in which Arcunii was a courtier, acquired him along with the county and then decided to get rid of him and give his troops some exercise.

    You're only outnumbered by under 7-1, now. Almost few enough to risk a smash and grab raid on the Al's you need and make peace with the Sultan for all your treasury.

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