Ah, our old friend Pedro the unwasched. 
Absolutly not the kind that is liked by Theodorians.
Absolutly not the kind that is liked by Theodorians.-
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Will the victory over the Turk be followed up with a quick decisive blow against the Venetian territory in the Morea, Crete and Rhodes?
Nothing more hilarious and sad at the same time as a wet cat. :rofl: And I see Pedro is making his usual rounds yet again.
It occurs to me that you are forming a sort of reverse Genoa. Very interesting where you choose to fight, and I thought the Turks had you that time. Nice work.
It occurs to me that you are forming a sort of reverse Genoa. Very interesting where you choose to fight, and I thought the Turks had you that time. Nice work.
I say that you move the capital to Constantinople and revive it's ancient system of baths and plumbing.
You know DoW, Your story reminds me the narrator of Me, Myself and Irene. Especially the beginning of each chapter.
That is a compliment, cause i really think that it was a splendid movie as is your story of everybodys little state that could.
Back to lurking....
That is a compliment, cause i really think that it was a splendid movie as is your story of everybodys little state that could.
Back to lurking....
Just wanted to tell you that your updates getting better and better, especially the pics.
Keep up the clean work
Keep up the clean work
I am really, really, really enjoying this AAR. Keep on rolling with the good stuff.
Soarom - Certainly the world needs improving.
Specialist290 - The dirty people of the world all look alike....
CSK - And if they don't they shall be taught again.
stnylan - An excellent point.
Charles II - Thanks and I will.
Chief Ragusa - I was quite pleased with the result. It's not propaganda at all
coz1 - Wet cats are great, the more the merrier. I didn't expect to get so much off of them.
Grundius - Indeed a lot of work ahead, but we'll get there.
SunZyl - Quite, how can Italians be left in charge of the clean people.
Snake IV - Is he liked by any?
Walter Model - I think it will be in this AAR a lot to come.
Fulcrumvale - Exactly.
Chief Ragusa - Not immediately.
Walter Model - Cleaning Aussie? Nah too much work to do there.
Le Ran - Thanks.
Vincent Julien - I actually want to avoid this becoming a Byz game, but reviving the plumbing ain't out of the question.
Deus - Thanks, I hadn't thought of comparing the two I haven't seen the movie in so long.
The_Imp - Thanks very much, I feel I'm getting the hang of this writing which is somewhat different than my other AAR.
acci_dent - I enjoy your AAR too so I'm glad you like this. Welcome aboard.
Specialist290 - The dirty people of the world all look alike....
CSK - And if they don't they shall be taught again.
stnylan - An excellent point.
Charles II - Thanks and I will.
Chief Ragusa - I was quite pleased with the result. It's not propaganda at all
coz1 - Wet cats are great, the more the merrier. I didn't expect to get so much off of them.
Grundius - Indeed a lot of work ahead, but we'll get there.
SunZyl - Quite, how can Italians be left in charge of the clean people.
Snake IV - Is he liked by any?
Walter Model - I think it will be in this AAR a lot to come.
Fulcrumvale - Exactly.
Chief Ragusa - Not immediately.
Walter Model - Cleaning Aussie? Nah too much work to do there.
Le Ran - Thanks.
Vincent Julien - I actually want to avoid this becoming a Byz game, but reviving the plumbing ain't out of the question.
Deus - Thanks, I hadn't thought of comparing the two I haven't seen the movie in so long.
The_Imp - Thanks very much, I feel I'm getting the hang of this writing which is somewhat different than my other AAR.
acci_dent - I enjoy your AAR too so I'm glad you like this. Welcome aboard.
For the not yet big (but getting there) principality that could times were on the up. A shopping spree in the Ottoman lands had just been completed and the prices had been quite a bargain.
A slight downer was that the Pope and his filthy cronies had also gone shopping, in Northern Africa, picking up Theodoros' unwilling vassal Tripoli in doing so.
I never wanted it anyway
Much to Alexander's surprise the Sultan of the Ottomans sent a letter to Doros in January 1520.
Alexander was sceptical but soon agreed. After all if the point of his crusade was truly to spread hygiene as he said then he could hardly refuse the help. Additionally the security promised would be very welcome.
In other routine matters Lithuania received a declaration of war from Mecklenburg dragging the alliance into yet another pointless war.
A revolt was sparked in Montenegro in 1521. Some Italians were caught sneaking around the back of the bathhouse in Cetinje. Suspecting the Italians were up to no good the population violently demanded Alexander take action. It was soon revealed that the 'Italians' were actually nothing more than a couple of locals returning from, a long shift cleaning out stables. This failed to appease the rebels.
Lithuania tried to give a hand to Theodoros by dealing with them. They failed miserably.
Lithuania tries in vain to help
Never send a Lithuanian to do a Greeks work - Theodoros sorts the issue
Seeing how weak the Lithuanians were Sweden took what was an ever popular course of action, declared war upon them. Begrudgingly Alexander once again accepted. The move was unpopular and the less desirables of Constantinople voiced this violently.
Give us peace or give us death! Alexander of course chose the latter. Why waste a good opportunity for cleaning out the population.
The next year came another request from Lithuania, please declare war on Brandenburg with us. At last Alexander had had it. No more stupid wars against not particularly dirty foes. He refused.
This left Theodoros all alone. Not at all a good position when you are not yet big and surrounded by countries who already are. Quickly the Georgian nations of Kakheti and the vassal Abkhazia were invited to form the Hygienic Orthodox Partnership (HOP). Alexander was happy to be in control now for if there's one thing Theodorans pride themselves on it's their leadership.
At last in 1527 the wars with Mecklenburg and Sweden were brought to a close, thus tidying up Theodoran diplomatic affairs considerably.
With the wars out of the way efforts could be directed to research. This bore fruit unexpectedly soon when a new invention was pioneered in Attica. A new type of bath with extra high sides and special funnels that reduced spillage and caught water that did escape. It was just the thing needed for the navy who's sailors often suffered horrendous deprivation being unable to bath whenever waters were rough.
A factory is set up to manufacture the new rough seas bath
The factory provided some nice benefits for the Atticans who received the reject tubs and soap free of charge. Such a bounty attracted the green eyed monster and the people of Euboea revolted demanding that they were in fact the best tub manufacturers in all the Greek lands.
Jealously leads to revolt in Euboea
The jealously was soon settled to the sharp edge of a sword and after the armour and weapons had been meticulously cleaned Alexander sat down to oversee the placement of soap and shampoo traders throughout Europe. In most places the merchants set up shop without problem. But in Genoa they faced a much more difficult task. No one would buy their product. It certainly proved the old saying, 'You can lead an Italian to soap but you can't make him wash'.
The waterlogged nature of the trading centre may also have played a problem
HOP received a welcome fourth member in 1535. Cephallonia at last saw the light and left their alliance led by the dirty Venetians to come and join the righteous and clean side.
Cephallonia? Where is that? Aren't your armies getting a little thingly spread with all the rebellions? What's your MP?
rofl at many gags.
congrats to ridding yourself of the useless warmongering Lithuanians.
But can the new HOP stand against its greater, filthier neighbors?
congrats to ridding yourself of the useless warmongering Lithuanians.
But can the new HOP stand against its greater, filthier neighbors?
Epirus is the name of Cephalonia's other province. Only they're Catholic not Orthodox. So the little nation says farewell to the big Lithuanians and their warmongering ways. How will Theodorans amuse ieach other now they can no longer make jokes about the alliance with Lithuania?
So in Montenegro, Lithuania reports attacking about 3000 rebels with 1000 men, while Theodoros supposedly attacked 1000 rebels with 3000 men.Duke of Wellington said:
Lithuania tried to give a hand to Theodoros by dealing with them. They failed miserably.
Lithuania tries in vain to help
Never send a Lithuanian to do a Greeks work - Theodoros sorts the issue
I don't suppose this was an embarresing friendly fire incident?