:rofl:AUTHOR #1
I had destroyed the only man in the room that was worth a grain of sand, the only one I could count as my true brother. He would serve at least twenty years for my betrayal, but I would be safer for it. The city would be safer for it. This was my gift to the state.
What a neat twist in the "gift to the state" category!
This is exceptionally well written, some earlier choppiness getting smoothed out by the end (which is unusual -- in these stories I often find they start great, then get choppy at the end!). I love the setting and mood -- reminiscent of, perhaps, Storey's stories, or Nil's Chicago. It's obviously well planned, to turn out so complicated yet make sense. I think more detail could have helped it make more sense, but it certainly came across.
Very good job! For author, I'd lean toward Storey or Nil out of desperation, but I think I recognize Coz1's intricate weave in this story.
p.s. Having read Coz' comment, he seems to throw off the scent, but I'm still suspicious. I don't think it's poorly written or "indicative of an English learner". Perhaps it is Nil, but I'll keep my guess on Coz until further notice!
Author #2
The slight departure from reality, I think, helped this story, though I generally like serious stories. Just like Lord Roxton, I first thought "how silly" and then thought "how brilliant!" Like Nil, I remain somewhat unsure what happened, and how it was resolved. But I get the impression the British were had, even though they were sure it was a ruse.
I think it would be a supreme irony if, as is possible from the setup, the Germans really meant to make peace with the British and take the war to the French instead, but that the British distrust ruined it! That would remind me of my favorite Babylon 5 episode, in which bitterness and distrust turned an opportunity for peace into a bitter war between the Narn and Centauri.
I'm going to guess this is Lord Roxton, simply because he is here and I expect he would comment if he contributed!
Rensslaer
p.s. I'll be back later with more comments about at least one of the previous entries, as promised!