Bruce and Barry get Bushwhacked - an Austrian AAR

Chapter 1, Part V
In which Bruce and Fred visit Italy

August 1432. In the dungeons. Bruce and Barry are talking to a rather grubby man dressed in what may once have been a yellow and red uniform.

Bruce: Right, you Swiss scum, our Noble Archduke has had enough of your insults. Take this message back to your king and prepare for war! *tosses a scroll to the ambassador*

Swiss Ambassador: Errr ... I know relations have been poor recently, but please believe that the Helvetian Republic has never insulted His Grace, the Archduke.

Bruce: Hmmmm ... Now that you mention it, you don't look like the guy who insulted Bert. *steps outside, looks at the cell number. Walks down a couple of cells, and peeks in* Ohhhh ... *returning* Looks like you're right. It was Magdeburg who insulted us. But since the scribes worked so hard on this letter, we'll stick with you anyway. Just look at the craftsmanship. *Pointing at the scroll in the ambassador's hand*

Swiss Ambassador: It is quite beautiful, my Lord, but please consider the consequences. If you start this war all the nations of Europe will hold you in suspicion, and your local populace will surely not support an unjustified war.

Barry: But we need this war for our mission Bruce. Don't let him talk you out of it. We'll get to raise war taxes while the war is on. *grins evilly*

Bruce: Well, we'll just have to risk it, I guess. This is what Bert wants, after all.

The narrator strolls in through the cell door.

Narrator: So the First Swiss War began in August of 1432. Austria received support from her allies Bavaria and Savoy, while, as the ambassador had foreshadowed, Helvetia received support from all over Europe, with Milan, Mantua, the Papal States, Frieseland and Genoa offering support.

Bruce: Bugger.

Narrator: Prior to the declaration of war, the Austrian K.u.K. Armee was stationed in Tyrolia, and from there invaded Milan, in order to negate the support coming from Italy. Meanwhile, a new army was hastily recruited in Vienna, and moved in to Tyrolia. Both armies inflicted defeats on the enemy, and Milan was besieged. Then, in April of 1433, Milan fell.

...

April, 1433. The smoke-filled streets of what is apparently Milan. Bruce is accompanied by a young man dressed in a very shiney military uniform.

Bruce: Well, Duke Friedrich, I think your cousin Albert made a wise choice in putting you in charge of this siege. It has gone very well.

Duke Friedrich: I had hoped it would be more interesting to be here in Italy. It was soooo dull outside the city. Still, the siege is over now, so maybe it will be more interesting soon. And hopefully someday soon Albert will have a son, so that he can take care of this sort of boring stuff.

Bruce: You have no aspirations to the throne for yourself, my lord?

Duke Friedrich: *assessing Bruce* You and your strange friend are known to be the closest allies of the Archduke. For me to admit such aspirations to you ... even if I held them ... would be to cut my own throat. In any case, running the country is not one of my goals, it would spoil what little fun I get to have.

Bruce: Good point ... Not everyone sees the burdens of government. They just look at the big palaces and the shiney coaches and the pointless executions.

Duke Friedrich: Archduke Albert has always been a most just ruler. And he recently sired a daughter, so surely a son cannot be far off. If not, I am sure that this girl will be a suitable heir for Albert.

Bruce: I believe that the laws of Austria do not permit a female to inherit the throne. But we'll take a climb through your family tree some other time. For now, here comes the Milanese deputation.

Three elderly men, dressed in rich, but somewhat dirty clothing approach, followed by five very battered looking soldiers. They bow deeply to Maximilian, and the oldest and dirtiest of the old men speaks.

Milanese Representative: O mighty conqueror, as we, the representatives of mighty Milan prostrate ourselves before you, so too our city bows before you. Your armies have scattered ours to the four winds, and you have torn down the walls as if they were ...

Bruce: Yes, yes ... what is your offer for peace?

Milanese Representative: *sneering at Bruce* We have not come to talk with mere servants. *turning to Friedrich* No doubt you will wish to incorporate Milan into your Dukedom?

Duke Friedrich: *yawning* No, I think that would be more trouble than its worth.

Bruce: My lord, if I may. Milan is a wealthy city, it would be the gem in Austria's crown, and also a great coup for you personally to have brought it under our control.

Duke Friedrich: Again you seek to tempt me with power. I am not interested in glory. I just want to get this war over and done with, and get back to my wine and a good book.

Milanese Representative: *bowing again* My lord, is it then sufficient that we pledge allegiance to your great nation?

Bruce: And agree to pay half of your incomes into our coffers. *under his breath* That should cheer Barry up.

Duke Friedrich: Yes, as the servant says, swear allegiance, pay us half of your incomes, and give us freedom to march our soldiers through your nation at will, and we will be content.

Milanese Representative: Thank you my lord, most magnanimous of you.

The narrator steps out from behind a smouldering building, his eyes watering slightly.

Narrator: Just over a month after the capture of Milan, and the subsequent vassalisation of the city state, Milan agreed to join Austria's alliance, swinging the balance of the war further in Austria's direction. In early February, 1434 Duke Friedrich and Bruce successfully captured Mantua. Once again, Duke Friedrich was content to vassalise the ciry state. The Austrians then returned to Milan, where a Genoese army was defeated, before moving in to Romagna to fight the armies of the Pope. In late March, the Mantuans also transferred to the Austrian alliance.

Bruce: Woohoo!

Narrator: Don't interrupt!

Bruce: Sorry ... do go on.

Narrator: Well, actually I had finished.

Bruce: You don't want to explain how we easily won the war, and annexed Switzerland, and Albert hailed us as conquering heroes? Something like that?

Narrator: Not in my notes. Sorry.

merrick: Trying to justify some of the AI's decisions is always fun. Some people have accused Bruce and Barry of being insane, but, as the narrator would say, they are just perfectly adapted for niche that they fill, i.e. having to deal with the AIs.


Stroph: Thanks, I'm glad you are enjoying. Your Sultan of Swat AAR was one of several that inspired me to have a go at doing this one.

The dungeons are practically full of ambassadors at the moment. The only problem I can foresee will be finding a place for all the ambassadors once we start finding thousands of protestants to lock up.

Chapter 1, Part VI
In which Bruce returns to face the music

April 1, 1434:

Scene: Bruce and Duke Friedrich seated on horseback watch the Austrian army as it winds it way through a lightly wooded area. A messenger approaches.

Messenger: *to Bruce* Are you Ludwig, advisor to Archduke Albert?

Bruce: No.

Messenger: Ahhh ... Then you are Wolfgang?

Bruce: No.

Friedrich raises an eyebrow, and the messenger looks confused.

Bruce: Errr ... That is, yes, I am Wolfgang. Sorry, I was busy counting the troops.

The messenger hands a scroll to Bruce.

Bruce: *Unrolling the scroll. Looking at the messenger.* Yes?

Messenger: I am instructed to wait for a reply, my lord.

Bruce: A message from the Archduke. Although we have crushed the Swiss and their allies, he's still not happy.

Duke Friedrich: *shaking his head* My cousin Albert was ever the demanding one, why I remember when we would play together as children ...

Bruce: Isn't Albert a fair bit older than you?

Duke Friedrich: *looking away* Err ... Yes, quite so. I must have confused him with my brother ... Don't you need to send a reply?

Bruce: Actually, I think I had better get back to Vienna. Albert is planning a punishment for Barr ... err for Wolfgang over this.

Duke Friedrich: Aren't you Wolfgang?

Bruce: *pauses* Yes ... yes, I am. Thats why I need to get back to Vienna and accept my punishment.

Duke Friedrich: Very well ... I am sure the war will go just as smoothly without you. I can command the troops quite well.

Bruce: *looks sceptical* Of course you can. Well, toodles.

...

May 1434

The throneroom back in Vienna.


Albert, wondering why an invasion of Switzerland ended up in Italy.

Albert: You have failed me, you incompetent fools. I give you one task every five years or so, and you can't even manage that! We have embroiled ourselves in a pointless war in Italy, and seen the flower of the Autrian knighthood slain all because you idiots didn't think to look for Schwyz in the mountains!

Bruce: Actually, the war went quite well for us.

Albert: *roaring with rage now* Did you, or did you not capture Schwyz?

Bruce: Well, no, but ...

Albert: Be quiet! I should have you executed for treason.

Barry: Treason?! We have always been your loyal servants.

Albert: But you don't do what I tell you to do. Thats disobeying an order from your ruler. Come to think of it, I am divinely appointed, so its not just wrong ... its positively blasphemous!

Barry: But we did our best.

Albert: What did you achieve then?

Bruce: Well for one thing, I took your cousin Freddy on a nice ride through Italy. He's been out of your hair for months now.

Albert: That is true enough, and it has been peaceful without him whining all the time. But thats not a good enough reason for a war ... well, not a big war anyway.

Bruce: We have also captured Mantua and Milan, and both states have become our vassals.

Albert: That is good. Not what I told you to do, but good, nevertheless.

Barry: Milan is a particularly prosperous city, my Lord. They will bring a steady stream of cash to our treasury.

Albert: What else?

Bruce: We have just made a peace with the Swiss. They are going to pay us 88 ducats.

Albert: Is that all we could get out of them? Why not capture Schwyz now?

Barry: The peasants are tired of the war, my Lord. They are revolting more and more often. We can barely raise enough troops to suppress the peasants, let alone besiege a fortress in the Swiss Alps.

Albert: Hmmm ... Very well. Your performance has probably been acceptable after all. I won't kill you this time.

Bruce and Barry both bow and thank Albert.

Albert: I will set you a new task, however. One more suited to your abilities, I think. Your mission, and I don't really care with you accept it or not, is to keep Steiermark! Begone!

Chapter 1, Part VII
In which things end with a whimper

September 1435.

Scene: The archducal throneroom. For a change it is thronged with brightly dressed nobles. A contingent from Bavaria stand before the Archduke. Beside them, stand Barry and Bruce, dressed in similar finery, although Bruce has had some difficulty in arranging his codpiece. Beside the Archduke stands his wife, Elisabeth, and his cousin Friedrich is stifling a yawn amongst the nobles to his right. Standing in front of this assemblage, but apparently invisible to them is the narrator.

Narrator: By April of 1434, then, the First Swiss War had drawn to a close. Although it was sparked by the implacable hatreds between the Swiss and the Austrians, the majority of the fighting in the war had taken place in Italy, and it was from Italy that the Austrian spoils of war had come. Over the next few years, Bruce and Barry spent many an hour in the dungeons, negotiating deals with Austria's allies, and flat out bribing them from time to time. In July 1434 Bavaria agreed to become vassals of Austria's. It took some time, but eventually a grand ceremony was arranged.

Court Crier: And so, with the exchange of these oaths, Bavaria and Austria bind the fates of their great nations together. Let all here present bear witness that Austria shall ever be a faithful protector of Bavaria, and that Bavaria shall now and always offer her loyalty to Austria before all others.

The crier pauses and spontaneous applause begins. When the applause is finished, he begins again.

Court Crier: The next item of business is the elevation of these two men here present to the rank of Count.

The crowd of nobles begins to slip away, except for Friedrich, who has fallen asleep leaning against a doorframe, and the Bavarian delegation, who hadn't located the exits in time.

Albert: *standing, and lifting to two chains from a cushion by his side* Wolfgang, Ludwig. In recognition of the fine works you have performed in my service, I hereby appoint you both to be Knights Commander of the Order of the Startled Ostrich. Come forth and receive your awards.

Barry and Bruce both move forward and kneel in front of Albert, who hangs the heavy chains around their necks. The chains are fashioned to look like a series of ostrich feathers, with each chain having at its end a flat disk with the image of an extremely surprised-looking ostrich's face etched onto it.


The founder of the Order of the Startled Ostrich.

Albert: Henceforth, all those in my realm shall refer to you by the title Count. Arise, Count Wolfgang *Barry stands up* Arise, Count Ludwig. *after a brief moment of puzzlement, Bruce stands as well*

The Bavarians applaud quietly, anxious not to wake Duke Friedrich. Albert and Elisabeth sneak out a door on the opposite side of the room, and the new Counts lead the Bavarians through yet another door, leaving Duke Friedrich in deep reflection on what has happened. He snores softly as he reflects.

...

January 1439.

Scene: A steep slope, with pine trees dotted across it. Two wolves glide across the snow. Speaking over his shoulder, the narrator keeps one eye on the wolves as he speaks.


The narrator, listening out for wolves.

Narrator: Here, in Hungary, in the 15th century was one of the last remaining habitats for the European wolf. Further west, the encroachments of man had driven the wolf, along with the aurochs and the European bear, over the edge and into extinction, but here in Hungary, a sense of the frontier spirit still remained. And it was here that Albert V came in 1439. To understand why, we need to look back.

The final few years of Albert's reign in Austria were busy years for Albert personally, but Barry and Bruce had little part to play in these successes. In December of 1437, Albert's father-in-law, the Emperor Sigismund died. Albert was elected Emperor in his place, and early in 1438, Albert left Vienna, never to return. Sigismund had also been King of Bohemia and King of Hungary, and Albert took over the rule of these two countries as well. However, Austria did not merge with its neighbours at this time - the thrones were combined only in the person of Albert.

In Albert's absence, a ruling council was established. Bruce and Barry formed a part of this council. For the time being, all was well in Austria, and the council met rarely, and made vitually no important decisions. From the start of 1439, although Albert continued to reign in Bohemia and Hungary, in Austria and Germany, the ruling council made decisions in the name of his unborn heir, Ladislas Posthumous, rather than in Albert's name.

And so, Albert's involvement in Austria ended not with his death, although that was to come soon after, but rather at the hands of the powerful nobles of Austria. And we will see the results of their decisions in the next chapter.

jwolf To be honest, it just rolled off the tongue. I hadn't noticed the Osterreich/Ostrich thing - just lucky, I guess.

Farquharson Lets just say that sometimes Bruce and Barry are easily distracted. Besides, I think that they are secretly enjoying things in Austria, apart from all the time they have to spend in the dungeons talking to ambassadors, of course. And barry really enjoys the feel of his codpiece.

Chapter 2, Part I
In which Barry and Bruce educate the emperor


Monarch: Ladislas Posthumos
Admin: 6
Dip: 6
Mil: 5

Aristocracy: 8
Centralisation: 4
Innovativeness: 4
Mercantilism: 8
Offensive: 5
Land: 8
Quality: 5
Serfdom: 8
Hmmmm ... Thats the same settings as for Albert V. One or the other is probably
wrong, but you get the picture.


February 1439

Scene: The Archducal throneroom. The nobles making up the ruling council are gathered around. Duke Friedrich, resplendant in a velvet robe and fox furs steps forth.

Friedrich: Ludwig and Wolfgang, you have served Austria well, both in Archduke Albert's presence, and during his current absence. As a reward, the regency council have unanimously agreed that you should be awarded a Knighthood in the Order of the Furious Hedgehog. This is one of the highest awards available to you in this land, and it entitles you to refer to yourselves as Marquis. *Friedrich pins a very prickly looking medal onto each of Barry and Bruce's chests.*


A furious hedgehog. Hedgehogs, of course, are noted for their quiet rage.

Bruce: *quietly to Barry* So now we have to call ourselves Marky? Both of us! Surely thats gonna get confusing? Can't we just tell them our real names?

Barry: No! Uncle Fred there is up to something, and we don't want to put him off side.

There is polite applause from the gathered nobles. Barry and Bruce bow and make there way out of the room.

Bruce: What do you mean Fred's up to something? He told me he wasn't interested in the throne.

Barry: Well, he would, wouldn't he?

Bruce: Would he?

Barry: Put it this way, Bruce, don't ever come between one of this lot and their chance at the throne.

Bruce: You mean he lied to me?

Barry: You know Bruce, there are times when I wonder if you're really cut out for international diplomacy. Of course he lied to you, numbskull! He wants the throne, but he couldn't make a claim for it while Albert was in such clear control. Now that dear cousin Bert is out of the picture, he'll make a grab for it any day now.

Bruce: But Bert is still alive and well and living in Hungary, isn't he?

Barry: Apparently, yes. But no one ever comes back from Hungary.

...

June 1439

Scene: The Archducal throneroom. Duke Friedrich, carefully dressed as always, has ensconced himself on the throne. The room is empty except for the Duke and out two heroes.

Friedrich: Now before his ... departure ... Albert set you two a mission. Have you succeeded in that mission?

Barry: Yeah, no worries, Fred.

Friedrich: You will refer to me as Duke Friedrich!

Bruce: Now where have I heard that before?

Barry: I miss Bert ... How is your cousin Albert?

Friedrich: You need not concern yourself with Albert. He has gone to Hungary, and I will rule in his place.

Bruce: I thought you didn't want the throne? And what about Ladislas? He is the Archduke, and the Emperor after all.

Friedrich: I hardly think that I will be worrying about an unborn child, who may or may not turn out to be male. So I am in charge, and I have a new mission for you.

Bruce and Barry glance at each other, and shrug.

Barry: You're the boss.

Friedrich: Damn right I am! Your mission is to vassalise Hungary. You have five years.

Bruce: But won't Albert object to that?

Friedrich: I am confident that Albert will not be troubling us much longer ...

Bruce: Oh Bert was never any trouble. A bit of a softy really.

Friedrich: You have your mission, now jump to it!

Barry: Since you have given us five years, perhaps we'll just wait until the Emperor confirms the mission.

Friedrich: *smiling evilly* I'm sure I will soon ... But don't expect to be given more time because you chose to wait.

...

September 30, 1440

Scene: The palace gardens. Bruce and Barry are relaxing with a game of chess in the afternoon sunshine, while the baby Archduke Ladislas plays on the lawns under the watchful eye of his wetnurse. The peace is distrubed by the approach of a furious Duke Friedrich.

Friedrich: Wolfgang! You are a fool! And you, Ludwig, you are useless!

Barry: Errr ... what seems to be the problem Fre ... errr your higness?

Friedrich: Last December you encouraged me to increase the amount of government business that was carried out here in Vienna.

Barry: Yes, its good policy to ensure a strong central government.

Friedrich: And you urged me to announce it straight after Christmas?

Barry: *nodding* Standard practice. The general public wouldn't be too happy about that kind of thing, so its best to announce it while they're still hungover from Christmas.

Friedrich: Even so, the people whispered and made accusations against me, and generally made life difficult.

Barry: Yes, but we sorted that out. The populace have gotten over that.

Friedrich: No longer. The peasants are becoming restive again.

Barry: Ahhh ... Now that, that comes from their lack of faith in your policies, and concern for their baby Archduke.

Friedrich: Why would they be concerned about the child?

Barry: I think there may be some concerns that members of the regency council could attempt to replace him on the throne ...

Friedrich: The mere thought hadn't even begun to speculate about the merest possibility of crossing my mind .. I mean the minds of anyone on the council.

Barry: Well, nothing to worry about there, then. So it must just be a lack of respect for the policies you are coming up with, then.

Friedrich: So you think that I, and my colleagues on the regency council are incompetent?

Barry: Not at all ...

Bruce: In fact, I think you'll find that Bar .. errr ... Wolfgang and I both serve on that regency council.

Friedrich: Really? I have not seen you at any of the meetings.

Bruce: Yeah, well, we have been flat out trying to educate the Emperor here *pointing at the baby Ladislas* on the importance of a sound a foreign policy.

Barry: Not to mention fiscal and monetary policy.

Friedrich: You have been wasting your time trying to teach the art of government to a one year old child?! You are greater fools than I had thought!

Bruce: Oh, I don't know. He seems to have grasped monetary policy pretty well. He took that ducat right out of your hand.

Barry: Yeah, that was a good sign. But then the nurse took it off him in case he choked on it.

Friedrich: In any case, you two incompetents have upset the people of the realm, and caused us to fall behind in our attempts to improve our economic infrastructure.

Barry: I don't see how its our fault. We weren't even there. You said so yourself.

Friedrich: You have a responsibility to the nation to be there! And now you must repair the damage your neglect has caused.

Bruce: That's checkmate, Barry.

Barry: Where? Oh yeah, so it is. Do you think Ladislas is up for a game?

Bruce: He's napping, I think.

Friedrich: So what will you do to reduce the restlessness of the peasants?

Barry: Look, Fred, we'll find some way to cheer up the populace. Some sort of parade to present young Ladislas to the public, I think. Give us a few months, and I'm sure that everything will be right as rain.

Its good to hear from people who are enjoying this. Please let me know if you DON'T like it too. I'm most likely not going to change my style too much if I get negative feedback - I'm writing for my own enjoyment more than anything else - but I'd still like to hear honest opinions. I may even learn something.

TreizeV Yes, this is my first attempt at an AAR. I read a few others, and figured I would give it a try.

Chapter 2, Part II
In which Bruce and Barry handle the truth

November 30, 1442

Scene: The library. Bruce is building a card tower, when Barry enters, accompanied by a middle-aged man in a clerical outfit.

Barry: Bruce. Bruce! This is Nicolas de Cusa. Have you met him before?

Bruce: Can't say I have Barry. Who is he?

Barry: Nick, I'll leave it to you to explain.

Nicolas: Currently I am on my way to represent the Pope at the Diet of Frankfort ...

Bruce: The Pope lives on a diet of frankfurters? That must play havoc with his digestive tract ...

Nicolas: To the best of my knowledge, no pope has ever eaten a Frankfurter, nor a Hamburger, nor a Viennese, nor any other German.

Barry: Anyway, I didn't bring Nick here so you two could discuss the culinary wonders of the fifteenth century. Nick has some ideas ...

Nicolas: Ah yes, it is my belief that the nature of God can be perceived in a multiplicity of aspects ...


Nicolas de Cusa contemplates the nature of God.

Barry: Not those ones, Nick. Your ideas about the stars ...

Nicolas: Ahhh ... But the nature of God is more interesting. All right ... I believe that all of the stars are like the earth, and that they move relative to each other.

Bruce: Close, but the earth isn't a star.

Nicolas: Ahhh ... you subscribe to the Aristotlean belief that the earth is the centre of the universe, then?

Bruce: Hell no! *reaches for a piece of paper* Look, the Milky Way is a galaxy, made up of millions of stars, and then at the edge of the galaxy ... about here ... is a relatively small star that we call ...

Barry: Bruce! I don't think the world is ready for your ideas just yet.

Bruce: Why shouldn't they know the truth, Barry? The deserve to know.

Barry: They want answers?

Bruce: I think they're entitled.

Barry: They want answers?

Bruce: They want the truth!

Barry: They can't handle the truth! No truth-handlers, them! Bah! I deride their
truth-handling abilities!

Bruce: Whoa ...

Barry: Yeah ... Anyway, they're not ready. Re-evaluating their worldview like that will just cause problems. Riots in the streets even.

Bruce: Well, what if I tell him and then just lock him up, so no one else hears.

Barry: We could do that, but the dungeons are teeming with ambassadors at the moment, and you know what terrible gossips they are.

Bruce: Hmmm ... We could say he's a witch and burn him at the stake.

Nicolas: Errr ... I am still in the room you know. Also, I should mention that as a Papal legate, the Pope takes a special interest in my whereabouts, and should I fail to appear at the Diet, there will be trouble.

Barry: Errrm ... Oh, we were just kidding around, weren't we Bruce.

Bruce: Oh absolutely. Big kidders, us, Nick. Austrian sense of humour, you know?

Nicolas: Yes ... Quite so. Where was I?

Barry: You were just about to explain your ideas about the nature of God to us, Nick ... *tucking Bruce's sketch of the galaxy out of the way*

OOC: Uncooperative philosopher event. Had the option to imprison him, but chose to let him remain free. Stability -1, Innovativeness +1.

...

October 1443

Scene: The throneroom. Archduke Ladislas (aged three) is perched somewhat precariously on the throne. His regency council surround him, with Duke Friedrich noiceably on the outer. Three Milanese representatives kneel before the throne, offering their allegiance to Austria. Bruce and Barry are located towards the back of a crowd of minor nobility present to witness the event. The heroic twosome chat amongst themselves whilst the ceremony drones on.

Barry: Good work with the Milanese ambassador, Bruce.

Bruce: A little bit of cash will go a long way sometimes.

Barry: Fred doesn't look to happy about it. Whats up his bum, do ya reckon?

Bruce: Well he was pretty chuffed when he heard that Hungary and Bohemia had both elected Ladislas as their king.

Barry: They elect kings? Weird!

Bruce: Yeah, its quite the tradition in this part of the world apparently. Anyways, after poor old Albert had that nasty hunting accident, they both needed new kings, and they voted in Ladislas. Fred thought he could send Ladislas off to Hungary, just like he did with the dear departed Bert, but the regency council wouldn't have a bar of it. Instead, they go behind Fred's back to do a deal with the Hungarians and Bohemians. Apparently they found a couple of lookalikes for Ladislas, and sent one to each country. One of us has the real Ladislas, the other two have imposters.

Barry: OK ... But aren't people a bit fussed that they don't have the real king, you know divinely chosen by God and all that?

Bruce: Well, the little kid isn't going to be able to make any decisions on his own for a while, right?

Barry: Right.

Bruce: So it doesn't really matter if he's the real one. When he turns 18, of course, it'll be a different story, but until then he's just a figurehead. And, he's at risk of assassination by others who might want to claim his thrones.

Barry: Like Fred?

Bruce: Got it on the nose, Barry. And apparently they're queueing up for the throne in Hungary and Bohemia too. And by having two imposters, it makes him safer.

Barry: How so?

Bruce: Well, lets say Fred has our Ladislas assassinated, right? Chances are that its not the real one. In which case, Fred will have revealed his intentions, and there's two chances in three that he won't have achieved anything. Same goes for all the other kingdoms.

Barry: Ahhhh ... Thats clever! So Fred is just in a huff over that?

Bruce: Yeah, mostly that, but also the fact that they arranged the whole thing without consulting him.

Barry: They didn't consult us either, Bruce. Doesn't worry me.

Bruce: Yeah, but Fred is worried that it means that nobody trusts him. Ohhh, isn't that cute?!

The ceremony is drawing to a close. The Milanese representatives have presented the keys to their city to "Ladislas" who is bashing them against the shield of one of his household guards. The court crier makes a final announcement, and the Milanese rise to their feet amidst polite applause.


OOC: Lombardia (Milan) pop 61,294. Income 24, Trade 14. Cloth province.
Also supply 8,751 troops - 8,000 inf, 751 cav

I was thinking that I'd move the ambassadors out of the dungeons to make room for the protestants when they appear, but perhaps I'll leave the ambassadors in there. That would explain how Protestantism spreads so fast in the game - some idiot locked Luther up in a cell next to an ambassador, and Pow! suddenly everyone in Europe knows about it.